Found it buried in My Documents while I was looking for something else. I had completely forgotten about ever writing this!
Integra stops at the top of the stairwell and stares down into that inky blackness of the basement. She'd been trying to work up the nerve for the past several days to venture down to the dungeon like room. Every time she'd stop at the top of the stairs, then her heart would seize up and she could barely breathe. This time was no different but she forced her feet to take one step at a time down that long and narrow stairwell to the cool basement below. She could hear his voice mocking her in her head for being such a coward every time she started to turn back and return to the mansion.
Finally the bit of light that filtered down the stairs disappeared completely, leaving her in a darkness so dense it almost felt like she was breathing it in. Like every other part of the mansion she didn't need any light to know where she was going. There'd always been something exciting about the night when she was a child, then that darkness became a soothing balm to her tired body and mind as she got older. He often teased her that she belonged to the night just as much as he did. Stopping at the aged wooden door Integra hesitates then reaches up to press her hand against it. It swung open with a familiar eerie squeal. She always loved the sound purely because it made the vampire that lurked inside cringe ever so slightly. She'd given strict orders that the hinges not be oil for that reason. It was petty of her, but sometimes he truly deserved it.
Pulling her lighter from her pants pocket she strikes it and reaches out to light the candle that was always left sitting on a stool by the door for her. The meager light didn't do much for dispelling the dark that choked the room. Picking up the candle she walks over to the old mahogany desk and lights the few candles that were sitting scattered about the desk. Finally the room was bathed in that warm light, but it did nothing for the cold. When she'd venture down here as a child Alucard would take her into his lap and wrap his coat around her while she pestered him endlessly with questions. She'd never been afraid of him, not since he stopped that bullet from hitting her. It was just something she saw in his eyes when he looked at her then.
When had she stopped being so comfortable around him? She scoffed at that, remembering exactly why she had started putting such distance between them. When it was him she imagined kissing her, taking her into his arms as a lover. She could still remember the look of confusion on his face the first time she had slapped his hand away when he came out to escort her inside the mansion after she had been gone for some foolish meeting. She had locked away her heart, but he still remained at her side, always watching over her. He had taught her how to be strong and fearless. She chuckles quietly as she brushes her fingertips over the top of the desk to the book that still lay open, his favorite bookmark dropped on top of it where he had left in a hurry. She owed him everything, but had given him nothing really.
Integra sits down in the massive red velvet throne and leans her head back as she closes her eye. Two weeks had gone by but she could still smell him in the room. Blood, gun powder, and something that was uniquely Alucard…she never could quite describe it. With a sigh she props her elbow on the chair arm as she drops her head into her hand. It was hard to tell which hurt worse at the moment, the empty socket where her eye had been shot out or her heart. Betrayed by Walter then Alucard disappearing…she didn't feel much like the Iron Maiden lately, but be damned if she was going to let anyone else see her heart was broken. Life goes on and she had an organization to run, there wasn't any room for a foolish heartbroken girl. Still, sometimes she'd give anything to have the chance to tell Alucard the truth…to tell him she loves him.
"M-master…?"
Integra jerks her head up at the sound of Seras' voice, "What is it, Seras?"
The girl's warm smile helped to ease the ache in her heart, but her empty socket still hurt like a bitch.
"Well, it's late…thought you might be hungry so I ordered a pizza. You need to eat."
Integra sighs and stands up from the chair, then takes a moment to snuff the candles before heading to the door. It was going to be pointless to argue, the girl was beyond stubborn when it came to Integra's health. She didn't know if it was because Seras was bored, some promise she made to Alucard, or just needed a friend. Either way she wasn't going to deny she enjoyed having the young vampire around even though she would never admit that out loud.
Stopping at the door Integra looks back over her shoulder into the dark room one last time before pulling the door to, "Goodbye, Alucard."