Writer's block, boredom, insanity, end of sophomore school year...
These drive me to write a little spinoff about what happened to Kahn in the events of Dang O' Ponies...ENJOY :D
A few minutes earlier before the end of the world
11:57 PM
Arlen, Texas
Kahn was busy trying to sleep but couldn't. "Jesus freaking Christ, man..." he thought.
As he stared at the ceiling, bored out of his mind, he turned and saw his wife Minh, happily sleeping.
Kahn slowly got off the bed quietly and gently kissed Minh in the head.
11:58 PM
He left his room and went to the room of his daughter, Connie, and saw her sleeping softly.
Kahn sighed. "Goddammit," he said to himself as he went to the kitchen. "Everyone's sleeping but me..."
11:59 PM
Kahn went to the kitchen and opened the fridge door to get a drink when he suddenly heard a small sound on his lawn.
Kahn immediately, but quietly, ran outside with a putter in his hand
12:00 AM
"Dauterive! Is that you there?" Kahn shouted as he looked around.
To his surprise, he saw a little cat on his lawn.
"Shoo!" Kahn said, making the cat ran away.
"Ugh." Kahn said as he shook his head. "I need to go back to sleep before some other stupid crazy thing happens..."
A white light suddenly appeared.
"Too late." Kahn muttered as he put a hand in his forehand and the light got bigger...
"Ughhh...What the hell?..."
Kahn noticed he was in a dark alley with some trash.
Kahn gulped. He was glad that he wasn't with a traumatized teenager with a knife in this situation.
He noticed a small rat looking at him. Kahn let out a glare.
"What are you looking at?-!" he barked as he waved his hoof to get rid of the ra...
I'm sorry. Hoof?
Ponies wearing fancy clothes were surprised to hear somepony scream in an alley.
They noticed a brownish unicorn with a black tail and mane and a banana peel on top of his head ran out of an alley.
Kahn accidentally bumped into an upper-class pony.
"I say!" the pony said with anger.
"WHAT THE HELL?-!" the unicorn, Kahn, shouted, "A GODDAMN STINKING TALKING PONY!-?"
Kahn slowly relaxed and asked calmly, yet still horrified, "Where am I?"
"Canterlot. I say, why aren't you dressed properly?" the pony asked.
"Ah...Shuddap before I look for a three hole puncher and three hole punch your face." Kahn muttered as he walked away, ignoring the upper-class pony's angered face.
After talking to another pony, he decided to go somewhere called "Ponyville"
He saw a small dragon with grocery bags. Kahn was surprised to see a dragon but he decided to ignore this.
"Hey kid!" Kahn shouted. "This Ponyville or something?"
The dragon looked irritated. "Yeah. And don't call me kid."
"Jesus Christ whatever." Kahn muttered as he put a hoof on his head.
"Jebus what?" the dragon said as he scratched his head. "You're the second pony to say that some other pony said that too. He was talking about the 4th season and Equestria Girls or something like that. He was hanging out with his friends like that one with the orange hat and sunglasses and..."
"Wait. ORANGE HAT AND SUNGLASSES?-!" Kahn said with a shocked look on his face.
"Uh...Yeah...?" the dragon said.
Kahn looked at the dragon with a concerned face. "Alright. Start from the beginning"
"Alright." Kahn said as he ran towards an apple farm. "That dragon said that they MAY be there..."
He immediately stopped running and saw 5 ponies there.
A light brown unicorn sighed. "Well, we're here..." he said.
Kahn had a shocked, disgusted look on his face. "What the? Not you rednecks!" he shouted.
The unicorn quickly turned around and was shocked to see who it was.
"Kahn?" the unicorn said. "Kahn Souphanousinphone?"
Kahn was walking towards them. He looked angry.
"Yeah it's me." he muttered. "Jesus freaking Christ, man..." he thought.
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