Boss: Gotta clear some shit up here first before you try to read this.

1. My boss suffers from certain issues for a reason.

2. Shit that I write can take a turn for the dark real fast, which is why I classified it with a possible horror genre depending on the direction I take it in. It could possibly change.

3. Everyone is included in the story but there's more based on the relationship between the Boss and Johnny. I love the boss and Johnny.

4. The farther I go, the more swearing there will be.

5. I also have a huge affinity for horror games so if things here get horrific, do NOT be surprised.

6. I'm also hella funny. Shit can be hella funny here.

7. If there are any questions, feel free to ask. Just don't be a dick about it. Please.

8. Manipulation of the simulation based on the mental state of a character will also be incorporated in order to make it more personal to the character, namely my Boss.

9. I will try to be as spot on with the characters as I can but if they get a bit ooc, don't be surprised.

10. This isn't a typical Saints Row fic. I have a tendency to make shit a bit deeper than they primarily are. I do that because it makes the characters feel more real to me.

I guess that's it. Reviews are appreciated. I can take constructive criticism. Just please don't be a dick. Oh, and:

11. I have never written a sex scene. Don't expect one. If one appears in here, it'll be my first and will more than likely not go into detail, but will be heavily insinuated.

Okay, I think that's it. Enjoy.

The universe was pretty much at their fingertips. They ruled over an entire alien empire, they had the power of time travel, they had the most deadly man in the world back at their side, and a number of other advantages, but...that didn't change things for the Boss. For Kano. Funny enough, despite how quickly she came to run the world and how cocky and sarcastic she was, despite how confident the air about her was, she had secrets she managed to keep all these years, even from the Saints. But that was coming to an alarming end soon and she couldn't stop it. She didn't want to admit it and if she could help it, she still wouldn't.

Kano was diagnosed with major depressive disorder and severe social anxiety when she was young before she joined the Saints. She was smart, though. Not a word of her issues were breathed when she got in, hence all her time in silence. She wouldn't risk it. If they were to find out, she would've been out the fucking door, so she made sure to keep her medication hidden and all of her personal issues to herself. Even after she became the boss (and then the fucking POTUS), not a word of her mental disorders was ever mentioned at any point. Not even to Johnny, the one person in the universe that she trusted without question or reason needed. Currently, she was sitting atop one of the towers after collecting the data clusters atop each of the platforms, simply looking at everything. She ran a gloved hand through her unruly black and iridescent pink hair that everyone oh so lovingly dubbed her 'anime hair' and let out a deep sigh. She had fallen into one of her 'fits' as she liked to call them and decided to go into the simulation and do what she did best, starting with shooting a random cop and ending with a pile of dead Zin strewn across the streets below her tower. Even after going through her little homicidal rampage, it only half helped. The anxiety slowed down, only to give way to the depression afterwards. Unlike her normal self, there was no sarcastic remark or pun when she was done. Just silence. Complete silence. She hadn't said a word since she came into the simulation. She couldn't stop enough, despite her normal act, the Boss was also very intelligent. She could even understand some of the shit Kinzie said, but still needed clarification from time to time and let's be real, sometimes it was just fun to see Kinzie's eyes roll like a slot machine when she had to repeat herself without using her extensive vocabulary. But her last conversation with Kinzie frazzled her.

"Of course I'm excited about time travel!", she exclaimed, "But we still have to be careful about how we use it. Interfering with the chain of events that have passed can severely alter how things are in the present. Something as simple as stopping Zinyak from taking Johnny could result in the invasion not only taking place sooner, but could also result in the possibility of Zinyak deciding to just blow up Earth anyway when he's shown how hard you're willing to fight to go against him, meaning there is no chance of stopping him because we're all dead. That would mean you guys would have never expanded and recruited me or Oleg or Viola, you wouldn't have ended up becoming the president, Matt would have never become MI6 and end up helping us anyway. It's like dominos, Boss. Even interacting with certain people can change how things play out. All I'm saying is that we have to be careful how we decide to use it. If I can figure out how to keep the world from exploding while simultaneously keeping what we have at our disposal, I'll let you know. Just PLEASE don't…well, don't be you when you decide to go between times, okay?"

It always made her laugh when Kinzie gave her 'don't be you' warnings when it came to certain things. Oh, she was a genius, but she really had no idea. Kano didn't have a 'you'. She had certain habits that remained constant, but she didn't know what exactly she meant when she told her not to be her. She was stressing out and getting moody and she knew why. When the earth blew up, EVERYTHING was gone. Including the medication that she had to take for her issues, which wasn't a big deal to her. The problem started a week later. What some people don't know about certain medications prescribed for problems like anxiety, depression, and mental issues similar to it is that you're NEVER supposed to just suddenly stop taking it out of nowhere for no reason because it could result in a psychotic break since the medicine is to help regulate certain chemicals in your brain and the sudden halt will cause more harm than good and could even result in having to go into 72 hour psych lock up (an issue she knew all too well). It had been a few weeks since then and it was taking it's toll on her. Bad. But again, it wasn't like she could tell somebody why she was moodier than normal. She couldn't tell Pierce why she stopped singing in the car with him when they drove around simulated Steelport despite how much he knew she loved music. Couldn't tell Shaundi why she stopped wanting to hang with her and her young, fun past counterpart as they continued catching up on their past shenanigans. Couldn't tell Kinzie why she didn't respond to their usual back and forth light hearted banter. Couldn't tell Asha why she didn't feel like sparring with her or doing training simulations with her to help keep her skills sharp. Couldn't tell Ben why she didn't have it in her to be his muse for his book that he was so soaked up in writing. Couldn't tell Keith why she didn't feel like reminiscing with him about their days in the White Crib and all of the wild things that happened during their campaign. Couldn't tell Matt why she didn't want to review the latest installment of his beloved Nyteblade expanded universe fiction even though she did have more of an interest in it since his simulation. Couldn't tell CID why she didn't snap back at him like usual every time he played Captain Obvious with his remarks. And what broke even more was that she couldn't tell Johnny anything at all. He knew her the longest. He noticed the changes. Even approached her multiple times about it, to which she responded with a bullshit excuse about how being in the simulation all the time was kinda starting to take a toll on her and she just needed to recuperate from time to time. In a way, he knew that was absolute shit, but he didn't push. Johnny was fully aware of how often she would be in the simulation and for how long. It didn't surprise anybody if the boss took a little time to just pull herself together before jumping right back in. They depended on the Boss a lot and they all knew it.

Kano stood from her spot at the top of the tower and looked down. When they first began to take over the simulations, the towers sometimes blew her mind, especially after Kinzie began to incorporate the fragmented data clusters into her coding, giving her the ability to jump impossible heights. But now, they didn't seem so high up any more. Of course after everything that happened, the simulation would start losing some of it's impressiveness, but this was different. Nothing was impressive anymore. At least, not to the boss.

"Hey, Boss", she suddenly heard Kinzie say. /span/p

"What's up?", Kano responded.

"I was going through the simulation and found that one of the rogue programs managed to respawn. I've already fixed the problem in the coding, I just need you to take out the program real quick". Kano nodded./

"Got it. Anything else I need to do while I'm here?"

"Nope. That should be it". A small cut in the white noise after Kinzie spoke let her know that she was once again alone and she looked down before kicking off the ledge and free falling from the tower. Despite how many times she went and played in traffic to disrupt the system, she couldn't help but wonder what would happen if she just decided to face plant the asphalt beneath her but she rolled her eyes. Like Hell she was gonna give her crew MORE of a reason to get nosey. A crater formed around her as the heel of her boot slammed into the concrete, putting her just a few feet in front of the respawned program and she let out an exasperated groan upon seeing which one it was.

"What the fuck is this dramatic irony bullshit?" she mumbled, looking at her past self. She almost wanted to say this was like one of Matt's fan fictions except poorly written and not as well executed. "No, you know what? Fuck it. I don't even care why you're the one that respawned", she ranted as she activated her fire buff and pulled out her smgs, proceeding to blow the program to bits. "I am NOT putting up with this shit today".

Kano's eyes opened as she came out of the simulation. She stepped down from the platform and ran her hands over her face, careful not to accidentally pull any piercings or smudge any makeup on her face. At this point, she just wanted to sleep and contemplated kicking CID out of his makeshift 'love nest' but she didn't feel like even having to interact with the agitating ball of shiny metal and unprovoked sass, so she peeked around the corner to see if Pierce was on the couch and thankfully, he wasn't. The second she laid across the couch and rested her arm over her eyes, footsteps could be heard walking towards her and she silently huffed out a 'fuck me running' before lowering her arm.

"What did I forget to do now?" she said before opening her eyes to see it was Matt. He crouched beside her like an excited child.

"Nothing! But I really need you to look over this!" he said, setting a laptop into her lap.

"Well, what is it?" she asked as she sat up to clearly look at the screen. "Doesn't look like anything for the simulations"

"It's my latest installment to the Nyteblade EU and I really think you'll like this one! I can honestly say this is some of my best work!". Kano let out a small breath and bit her lip.

"Matty, I don't know if-"

"You didn't read the last one I wrote", he pouted,"at least read this one. I promise you'll absolutely love it!". She threw her hands up in defeat.

"Alright, alright. I'll read it". Her red brown eyes began to read down the lines a bit quickly at first, but the more she read, the slower she went before turning her attention to Matt.

"You…you actually wrote me into it?" she asked, skimming back over all of the details in the story. From her constant sarcasm and swearing to the small victory smirk that crossed her features when things went her way. He nailed every detail.

"I mean considering how everything worked out in the simulation you accompanied me in and how you left everything to me, I figured I could show some appreciation by making you a bit of a reoccurring character here and there. And the fact you didn't shoot me when you found out you were the sidekick in my other story", he awkwardly chuckled. "And you seemed pretty into it once I broke it all down. Asha still won't give my 'paranormal bromance' a chance, but I wrote her in anyway". Kano let out a small laugh. "No need to thank me", he said, especially proud of himself, "I know it's wonderful"

"Yes, it is, Matt", she agreed as he made his way back to his little corner of the ship. In a way, that interaction lifted her spirits a little. It was cute in a childlike way that he showed his appreciation through including people in something he loved even if they didn't like it as much. Again, she laid back down on the couch, her arm back over her eyes, attempting to doze off which was almost successful until she felt her legs being lifted and sat back down onto a lap after someone else sat at the end of the couch.

"So, you gonna tell me what's up now or are you gonna bullshit some more for the next week?". There it was. The no bullshit tone of Johnny Gat who was waiting to see if she was ready to be honest with him or not. She sighed, keeping her arm over her face. If she even attempted to look at him, she might just vomit up her whole life story and she wasn't going to make him sit through that train wreck.

"Haven't decided yet", she mumbled, already attempting to curve the conversation that hadn't even started yet.

"Boss. Drop it already. You never turn down a murder spree and yet, you all of a sudden don't have the energy for it for the past few weeks?" he said. She shrugged.

"Taking down an alien empire kinda takes a lot out of you"

"And yet, when you go into the simulations on your own, you kill everything that even looks like it's thinking of moving".

"Nice to know that you're watching my every movement", she sarcastically remarked. It wasn't like she didn't want to tell him. He was her oldest and best friend and it made her sick that there was a part to her that she kept hidden from him after everything that they had been through together. Especially with what happened with Aisha.

"I've had your back for a long ass time, Boss. And I know you've had mine. Even risked everyone else's skin just to come and find me based on the feeling you had. So what's the problem now?"

"What makes you so sure something's wrong, Johnny?". Johnny turned his gaze to her, only being met with the tattoos across her forearm.

"I have a feeling. And plus, how the fuck can something be wrong when you're pretty much ruler of the fucking galaxy?" he pseudo joked, making Kano kinda laugh. Well, he had her there.

"I'm just dealing with some shit right now. No big deal"

"I'd believe that if this wasn't something that's been happening for weeks. Now, quit givin' me the run around. I ain't Asha. I'm not gonna accept some passive bullshit just to avoid possibly being asked the same shit. You know about all my skeletons in the closet", he said, making them both kinda chuckle at the pure honesty in that statement, "and as long as we've been tight, there's no reason I shouldn't know about all of yours. Fuck, I helped you put most of em there". A small silence passed between them and Kano dropped the arm from her face, looking up at the ceiling before sitting up beside Johnny, leaning her head back against the couch. Her eyes wandered around the room for a moment, trying to think of a way to word everything without actually telling him what was up.

"There's…some things going on in my head that isn't quite…agreeing with me", she slowly said, still trying to find a way to explain without explaining. Johnny looked at her, brow raised above the frame of his glasses./

"You ain't growing a conscious or some shit, are you?". She rolled her eyes and almost laughed.

"Fuck no. This has nothing to do with a conscious. It's just…shit in my head isn't sitting right", she sighed. Johnny sighed and ran a hand over his face.

"Boss…are you having like a mental breakdown or somethin'?" he said.

"Well…sorta". Again, she was trying to turn the conversation. The gears in Johnny's head began turning. Silence took over for a brief moment and Kano began to get anxious again.

"What aren't you tellin' me?" he said, crossing his arms. She bit her lip, pulling on the piercings she had. At this point, she knew she had to throw in the towel. He wasn't having it. Either she was gonna tell him now or she was gonna tell him later, but regardless, she was gonna tell him. They both knew it.

"Tell you what…meet me in the simulation later and I'll tell you everything". Again, Johnny raised a brow.

"No run around bullshit?" he asked.

"No run around bullshit".

Review please. The more reviews I get, the more likely I am to update. Thank you.

-Boss