Disclaimer (Legal): I do not own any part of All Dogs Go to Heaven; I am merely here to have some fun by making up a script format of an Abridged Series of it. Because I do not have access to the means to make Abridged Series videos, if you wish to use this script in any part feel free to ask me, and I will whole-heartedly allow you to do so.
Disclaimer (About Content): This fanfiction depicts the characters of All Dogs Go To Heaven using raunchy vocabulary and actions all for comical intent. It is all only a joke and is not meant to offend anyone. This is not suitable for those under the age of 13. Reader discretion is advised.
Episode One: No Wonder People Do CharliexItchy Yaoi, Part I
Parody of: "The Doggone Truth"
INTRO
[A brief blurb of the ADGTH: The Series intro plays. VO (Voice-Over) of Charlie can be heard on a still of the series' logo]
Charlie: All Dogs Go To Heaven: The Abridged Series… let's hope the big man upstairs is grading on a curve today…
[Still of "The Doggone Truth" episode title with "Episode One: No Wonder People Do CharliexItchy Yaoi" beneath it. A majestic view of San Francisco can be seen, yadda yadda yadda. After a few seconds, "In Stereo" pops up along with a "=P" emoticon and the camera zooms slowly into the picture of the city. As the city's streets come into view, Charlie's VO can be heard once more]
[On screen, the words "Actual Quote From The Series" can be heard as Charlie speaks]
Charlie: I can't believe Annabelle is sending us on a mission to save a CAT! We hate cats!
Itchy: "Someone set us up the bomb", indeed…
Charlie: (Head peaks out from behind a wall)…dammit Itch, you need to stop making Engrish references…
Itchy: That so?
Charlie: Quiet, quiet… (sniffs the air) Heeeeey… did you rip one?
Itchy: What are you talking about?
[Camera pans over to a view of a hamburger cooking on a grill]
Charlie: …either you spazzed, or that is the most gut-wrenching burger I've ever smelt. (Walks forth with his tongue out)
Itchy: (Dashes in front of Charlie) It's a city. Of course the food vendors' food sucks, hence the smell.
Charlie: Good for you. But I think I need to give whoever is cooking that crap burger a swift bite in the pants… (dashes past Itchy)
[Charlie approaches a disguised Killer who is attending the burgers]
Charlie: Ya know, I'd be totally surprised if that was Killer. (Is near the vendor) Yo. Burger, stat!
Killer: (To self) Coming right up, dummy.
Charlie: What?
Killer: Uh, coming right up!
[Cat approaches an alleyway where there is a boy ready to shoot a water balloon at it from a slingshot. Shot of Itchy flipping out, and his audio plays as the boy prepares to hit the cat]
Itchy: [Famous Darth Vader "Nooooooooooooooooo!" from Star Wars: Episode III]
[Boy hits cat with a paint-filled water balloon. Camera pans to Charlie and Killer]
Charlie: Awwwwwww *bleep*
Killer: See ya in hell, loser! (walks off)
Charlie: (Head drops) Wow, I am surprised.
Itchy: (Approaches Charlie and shakes him gently) Nice job screwing the mission, bud.
Charlie: *bleep* off, Bitchy.
[Thunder can be heard from a distance]
Itchy: Hey, *bleep* you!
Charlie: No time! C'mon!
[Shot to a storm cloud where a beam of light from above shines outward. Charlie and Itchy are shown running from it and are eventually caught and pulled up to Heaven. Annabelle is seen floating there as Charlie and Itchy arrive.]
Annabelle: (Floats toward the boys) Charles. [Darth Vader Voice Over: "You have failed me for the last time".]
Charlie: (makes a choking noise on a still on his open maw for a few seconds)
Annabelle: (Lunges forth and pokes Charlie in the chest, then snaps her fingers) I'm not done yet. You've been a bad boy, Charles… (Appears in a soldier's jacket and with a whip tapping her foot)
[Screen fades to black with the words "S&M fan service scene depicted too graphic to air". This shows for about 6 seconds before fading back to the normal scenery]
Annabelle: (Puts on her soldier's helmet, which appears from nowhere) Attennnnntion! (Annabelle's audio is blurred out as the visuals and Annabelle's audio continues normally for about 12 seconds)
Charlie: (Thinking to self) Man, as if the whipping wasn't enough… now she's going to just bitch about -- oh, crap, she's done talking!
Annabelle: (Audio can be heard normally) …you never showed up!
Charlie: (Shrugs) Uh…. What?
Annabelle: (Sniffs air) Liar liar plants for hire.
Itchy (Off-screen): "Pants on fire".
Annabelle: Whatever. PK Thunder Alpha. (Lightning bolt zaps Charlie's rear)
Charlie: (Is hit) *bleep!*
Annabelle: Mission Foxtrot Uniform Kilo -- Return kid's missing [the word "jizz" from the song "Jizz In My Pants" plays] money. (Slips over to Charlie's side) You spent it on [The words "a video game", used in the line "Wasted a paycheck on a video game" from the song "Chuck E. Cheese Hell", plays].
Charlie: I was framed.
Annabelle: Bull shoot.
Itchy: "Bull *bleep*"
Annabelle: Hush. (Leaps away, as does Charlie) [Off-screen] As for your vocabulary, Itchiford… PK Thunder Beta.
Itchy: (Lightning strikes him in the rear) Yaiiii!
Charlie: (Laughs at Itchy before lightning zaps him as well) Owwwww! (Leaps away)
Annabelle: (Snaps fingers) At ease. (Military clothing vanishes)
Charlie: Whew…
Annabelle: [Off-screen for a second or two] If you want to stay on Earth, you have to do a good deed… a real good deed. (Turns head) Until you do, I'm going to use my heavenly PSI on you when you mess up. Got it?
[Charlie and Itchy whirl about into a tornado effect]
Annabelle: Sayonara! (Snaps fingers, sending Charlie and Itchy back to Earth)
[Camera returns to San Francisco and pans over as Charlie and Itchy splash into the fountain]
Itchy: (Coughs) Nice going, Charlie. How come you mess up, and I get soaked.
Charlie: 'Cause. You touch yourself at night.
Itchy: [Phillip from South Park says "Oh yeah", in response to Terrence some time before the "Uncle Fucka" song from South Park the Movie, followed by a Terrence and Phillip laugh from Charlie and Itchy, which occurs directly after Phillip says "Oh yeah" in the voice over clip]
Charlie: (does Terrence and Phillip laugh as he places the cap on Itchy's head, then leaps out of fountain) Wonder what Sasha's up to? Come on, wank master. (Runs off)
Itchy: (Runs after Charlie) Yeah, we really oughtta -- what did you call me?!
[Camera fades to black]
END OF EPISODE ONE, PART ONE.
Disclaimer (About Content, reposted): This fanfiction depicts the characters of All Dogs Go To Heaven using raunchy vocabulary and actions all for comical intent. It is all only a joke and is not meant to offend anyone. This is not suitable for those under the age of 13. Reader discretion is advised.