Particles of dust spring in a violent assault against blue cotton and a puffy pink duster- only to be swept away harmlessly and soundlessly towards a compact vacuum cleaner.
"Curse you, you plump"- Screams the King of the Dust Bunnies, before he and his army are sucked up into the darkness of the hoover.
I switch off my weapon of mass destruction and walk over to see Danger Mouse- my boss, my best friend, and my boyfriend.
"How are you doing, DM?" I ask jovially, leaning over the back of the sofa and giving him a friendly smile.
"I'm bored!" he huffs in reply, glaring me at me as though I'm responsible for him and his boredom. "I want danger, I want excitement! I want a mission!"
"Danger Mouse, you can't go back to work until your leg is mended." I remind him patiently with a sigh, going over to plump the pillow his bad ankle is resting on. Sometimes I wonder if he had known he was signing up for my mother hen package when we began dating.
"You can't tell me what to do! I'm not a kid!" He retorts, sticking his tongue out at me as leans back into the sofa cushions in a pouty sulk.
"You're acting no better than one, Chief." I answer boldly. He just folds his arms and glowers at me.
"How's the leg?" I ask cautiously, and he suddenly throws his venomous glare to his left leg- currently imprisoned in a cast, which had been signed by Danger Moth, Danger Mole, Danger Bug, Danger Hedgehog, Professor Squawkencluck, Colonel K - and of course me!
"The only thing I can say is that I wish it wasn't in a cast," he grumbles quietly, folding his arms across his chest.
I wince with sympathy. It isn't much fun sitting around incapacitated, and not even being able to walk. But DM hadn't been careful on our last mission; he attempted to jump across London's rooftops to catch the Baron's Frog's Head Flyer; but a poorly calculated jump caused Danger Mouse to fall off a roof and he fell down the stairs of someone's fire escape.
He'd been lucky that he only got a few scrapes and bruises in addition to the broken leg. It could have been his neck, according to the doctor. I was so frightened there and then that I vowed to keep him in the flat until he was healed; or at least until he had some independence again.
As much as I love him, he can be very trying sometimes.
Since he can't do anything in the flat at the moment, I'm responsible for pretty much all our chores and seeing to his needs. This might be all I do here, but it's ten times worse when he has a broken leg, for I feel isolated at times. Squawkencluck and several Danger Agents stop by and offer help here and there, but I'm pretty much on my own when dealing with my beloved's foul moods.
"So, do you fancy playing a video game?" I offer, attempting to cheer him up.
"Not in the mood," Huffs DM crossly, giving his cast the death stare again.
I'm relieved that Professor Squawkencluck temporarily confiscated his i-Patch- he looks as though he would gladly bring it the same fate as many of the Professor's inventions- in pieces, and him in innocent denial over him being the cause of its end.
I bite my lip. I'm not sure how I could make him feel better without him getting irritated at me. Sitting down near him on the sofa, I pick up a book I had been reading about the history of jam making and open it to the page I left off; 304, if anyone is curious to know!
The living room descends into silence, with only the sounds of our breathing gently fluttering though the air, combined with the occasional soft sound of page turning from me.
….
Sometime later, about page 312 later, I become aware of a weight in my lap, hidden behind the book's covers. Lifting it up tentatively, I notice with surprise that DM had taken the liberty of lying his head across my thighs.
"I do hope you don't mind, Penfold, but I was feeling lonely." He says with his customary smirk on his face.
"How- I've been right here in the room with you all this time!" I point out, feeling hurt that once again, my contribution is left in the dust.
"Well, yes, but I meant it in a slightly different way." He answers, before his smirk falls away to a frown. "Penfold, love, I was meaning to ask after I was discharged… are you mad at me?" he asks, in a voice so unlike him I feel alarmed and worried.
"For what, darling?" I ask in concern, allowing a hand to cup his cheek gently. He smiles gratefully at me for a small moment, before sighing.
"Well, it… it might have been somewhat my fault for getting my leg broken, and you, Penfold, have put up with an increased workload because of my injury. Not to mention my churlish moods…."
"Oh, DM, of course I'm not mad." I tell him lovingly. "It was just an accident, sweetheart, and not one you or I anticipated. Besides, I'm more than happy to help you in any way I can until your leg heals."
He smiles up at me.
"Penfold, I will never understand your limits," he says with such a quiet gratitude that I almost forget the occasions when I never received even a thank you over the past few days. "I have no idea what I will do without you."
I smile back at him, before leaning forward. Our lips meet, and I feel the familiar warmth soar through my insides, making me feel giddy and so loved.
I feel his arm snake itself behind my head as we deepen the kiss with the mutual passion and tenderness we hold for each other.
…
When we pull away, he lays his head back down on my lap again, giving me a huge smile; not a cocky smirk, but a smile filled with a warm and simple affection.
"I love you, Penfold," he tells me dreamily.
"I love you too, DM," I reply, allowing my fingers to run through the tuft of fur atop his head gently. He lets out a small sigh of contentment, and I feel his shoulders finally relax, before he lets out a small yawn and closing his eye.
Seeing as I'm here, I might as well take a break from my chores for a while. And I can't think of any better way to spend it than being here with my beloved.
Just like old times.