"Well, what do we have here?" Kirk asked as he walked to his chair. As Spock turned to answer, there was something on his face - but Kirk couldn't put his finger on what.
"It is most peculiar, Captain. A ship seems to be hailing us with short-range transmissions while the radars clearly state that there are no ships within that range. I am running diagnostics on both systems for errors, but I am unable to determine the source of this anomaly."
So he was enjoying this. Great.
"That's nice, Mr. Spock, but what are they saying?"
"The signal claims the ship to be the SSV Normady with the Systems Alliance."
"Never heard of it. Open the channel!"
A red-haired woman appeared on the screen, wearing what seemed to an armored uniform with an N7 marking on it. She seemed human, which was good. At the same time, she also seemed military, which could be very, very bad. Hopefully not renegade-romulans-from-the future-here-to-destroy-the-timeline bad, but still.
"This is James T. Kirk of the starship USS Enterprise. Who am I speaking to?"
"Commander Shepard, captain of the SSV Normandy. Your ship is really hard to track down."
"You are looking for us, then?" Kirk asked while glancing over to Sulu's display to check again if their shields were up.
"We are on a vital mission. Entire human colonies are vanishing, and we've uncovered evidence that not only the act is carried out by a mysterious race of the Collectors, but they are merely slaves of an ancient race of starship-sized…" It didn't take long for Kirk to get lost in the explanation packed full of Reapers, Geth, Collectors, Mass Relays and who-knows-what-else. He'd given up at following the story, and only focused himself enough to comprehend what the redhead was saying at her summary "...I am building a team to stop this threat. We will strike at their HQ, and hopefully prevent a race of sentient machines from returning and wiping out intelligent life in the galaxy."
Kirk was silent only for a few moments before he promptly begun to address his crew in the cockpit. "Mr Sulu! Please plot a course to the nearest Federation base with long-range communications! Mr Spock, as acting captain in my absence, your orders are to report this situation to HQ, and bring us any and all reinforcements they can give..."
Shepard stopped and blinked a few times before taking an apologetic tone.
"Oh- The truth is, that we are here to recruit Mr. Spock, as I am in need of a science officer, and according to his dossier, he is the best there is. "
Shepard could only judge by the reaction of the Enterprise's crew, but it seemed Kirk was not often left this dumbfounded and speechless...