Emily Prentiss stood up from her desk with determination written on her face. Today was going to be the day. She looked up at Hotch's office and made her way up the few steps and over to the closed door. She faltered right when she reached the door. 'I have to do this.' With that thought she knocked lightly on his door.
"Come in."
Emily slowly opened the door. "Can I talk to you for a minute Hotch?"
"Of course. Come on in. Have a seat."
"That's okay. I think I'll stand." Emily looked at Hotch working on his paperwork and she felt like she couldn't breathe. She started to pace around the small space of his office trying to think of how to say what she needed to say.
Hotch looked up at her with a worried look on his face. "Prentiss, are you okay? What's wrong?"
Emily ignored him and kept pacing. She had too many things running through her mind right now; she couldn't listen to him as well.
"Stop pacing! You're making me nervous."
Emily looked up and met his dark, brooding eyes. "I have to tell you something Hotch, and I'm really nervous. And I just walked in here and you're already looking at me like I'm nuts and I think I might be hyperventilating but I can't hold it in anymore. I'm usually so good at compartmentalizing but this…this is kicking my ass." She blurts out in one breath. She's trying to get her breathing under control but with the way Hotch is looking at her makes it very difficult.
"You can tell me anything Prentiss. You know that."
"I don't want what I tell you to change anything between us. I still want us to be Hotch and Prentiss because if I ruin that from what I say to you I might go jump off the roof because that's not my intention. I just can't keep it in anymore. The smart thing to do would be to tell JJ or something but I can't do that to her. You're the one I can tell. I don't want you to look at me differently when I tell you what I need to tell you. Promise me Hotch."
Hotch sits there wondering what has Prentiss in such a jumble. He's never heard her ramble on like this before. Whatever she had to tell him it must be very important and weighing heavily on her mind.
"Promise me Hotch," Emily repeats again, and Hotch realizes what she just said.
"I promise you. I won't look at you differently when you tell me whatever it is you need to tell me. You have my word."
Emily takes a deep breath, looks Hotch in the eyes and just blurts it out. "I love you! In a really big horrible way. I have for a while now. And I know it's so stupid of me to tell you because nothing will ever come out of it, I mean you're my boss and there are rules, and you don't see me that way, but I can't keep it in anymore and I really need you to know."
She pauses and sees Hotch looking at her with his eyes wide. She bites her lip. Man, she just fucked up. She feels it. Nothing is ever going to be the same between them anymore. This is why she didn't want to tell him. Her confession just changed everything. Him not saying anything was starting to make her even more nervous then when she first walked in here, so she decided, 'hey why not just say everything that's on my mind!?' So with him looking at her like a deer caught in headlights, she continued on.
"Do you really have no idea how much I want you? How much I need you? How fast my heart beats when I see you? Hotch I get butterflies in my stomach when you call me Emily, because it's not often and I know it's usually for a good reason. I can't breathe when I'm around you. My palms get sweaty. God, there have been so many nights that I can't sleep because all I can think about is you. I've even stopped myself from going to your apartment and throwing pebbles at your window screaming I'm in love with you. But the sad part of all of this is the fact that every morning when I first see you and I say good morning Hotch, I always hope you see something in me that you didn't see the day before. That you'll look at me the same way I look at you. I look at you and I see the person I've wanted to find my entire life."
Hotch stands up and Emily starts to get worried. She's never seen that look on his face before. He moves to stand in front of her.
"What you just told me changes nothing between us. I will keep looking at you the same way that I have been looking at you. I will keep sneaking peeks at you when no one else is looking. I'll keep pairing us together on cases so I can keep you safe. You said you didn't want anything to change between us from your confession. It doesn't change a single thing between Hotch and Prentiss. But if you want, maybe we can change things between Aaron and Emily."
Emily gasps. Did she just hear him right? Did he say he was looking at her when no one else was? What did that mean? Is he saying he wants her like she wants him?
"I feel exactly the same way about you that you feel about me. And yes there are rules, but I don't see why we wouldn't be allowed to try to deal with these feelings if we keep those feelings separate from work. Emily, would you want to do that?"
The butterflies were working their magic in her stomach. "Hell yes!"
Hotch smiled at her and leaned in to kiss her sweetly on the lips. They pulled apart reluctantly. After all they were still at work. "How about I pick you up tonight, let's say around 8, take you out to dinner and we can talk about us. Well the Aaron and Emily part of us. And we'll leave Hotch and Prentiss here at the office. Is that something you're up for?"
Emily suddenly couldn't talk, so she just nodded her head.
"Great! Now go back to work and I'll see you at 8. Oh, and Emily, wear a dress. I rarely ever get to see those great legs of yours." He flashed his dimples at her.
Emily blushed and giggled like a school girl. He felt the same way about her! This whole time she had been worried and now she didn't need to be. She went back to her desk looking like she just won the lottery. She had a date with Hotch tonight. Correction, she had a date with Aaron tonight. She could get used to calling him Aaron. She couldn't wait for 8 to roll around. But she had better things to do than work on the case in front of her. She had to figure out what she was going to wear!