Hello people, I am the Author. One of many who take joy in writing stories. Today I will take part in story that I'm trying to make funny but we'll see where we go. Enjoy the story and I hope I make you laugh.
Chapter 1: I am Author!
Author sighed as she stood, looking down at her beautiful characters. Maria, Asha were heaps of flesh and next to them were her sins, Eve and Satan.
"Wait! This in not the beginning! Start over!" Author yelled at the writer.
Author was a large girl, up to 500 pounds and gaining more weight with everything she ate. Some people wondered how she was able to move. She wears tube tops and mini skirts to show off her folds of skins.
"WRITER!" Author screamed looking down at her disgusting form.
Author is not ashamed but finds Writer is the kindest, sweetest girl who would change her back if she stopped being a jerk and butting in!
"Fine I'm sorry" Author said with a frown "please continue."
Author was a lovely girl with the perfect hour-glass-figure. It was the reason she no longer was eating Quiznos at lunch. She had short brown hair that was cut uneven and brown eyes that were covered by glasses and had braces on her shirt.
Today she wore a black t-shirt that said 'Love is poison, love with heart.' She was also wearing black stretchy pants, a mini skirt, black boots that laced up and a long black sweater.
"Thank you" Author said looking in a mirror, "500 pounds is a lot to carry."
Anyway, today's story is start in Brantford, Canada. Author walked down Colborn street with her dad, the thought of running out into the middle of the road into oncoming traffic seemed like fun compared to talking to her dad about people he hated. She began to zone out as her father talked about what he liked, her mind going to Kingdom Hearts 2 were it belonged.
'Author, what do you want to do?' writer whispered in to her ear.
"Why are you asking me? Your going to be Author someday so you have to learn how to do this without my help." Author said quietly.
Fine but if I screw this up it's you who will suffer.
"What did you say?" Author's dad asked looking down at her confused.
"Nobody" Author said with a smile. All of a sudden a large black hole appeared and sucked Author into it. It was too fast since she was gone before her father could do anything.
"Oh yeah, so original" Author said sarcastically.
Author appeared in a small town she thought she knew but it couldn't exist, could it. It looked like Hallow Baston, from Kingdom hearts 1 and 2. She walked a bit and saw heartless begin to swarm around, fear boiled in her as she tried to back away.
"Oh my god! HELP!" Author screamed as one of the heartless charged at her. A light flashed as she saw a boy with a key blade fighting the heartless with a duck and a dog. "That's Sora, Donald and Goofy stupid" Author said to the Writer.
I KNOW! I JUST WANTED TO INTRODUCE THEM THIS WAY BUT NOW IT'S TOO LATE! Anyway, after the heartless were defeated the boy walked over to Author.
"Are you ok?" Sora asked calmly.
"I guess" Author said with a smile. "Thank you for saving me."
"No problem." Sora said with a smile.
"Why don't you come with us to Leon's house, it'll be safe there from the heartless." Goofy said with a smile.
"Ok but I'm not really from this world and that was actually the first time I saw those things..." Author put a hand on her mouth to stop herself from saying more.
"I actually already know what a heartless is I'm just being controlled by a newbie" Author said quickly, knowing something was going to happen. A large key board appeared and two hands that faded into the sky at the wrists.
Newbie am I, well this newbie is going to have some fun. Then something strange happened. Sora and Author switched bodies. They started at themself in shock and at the keyboard that had done this to them. Seconds later the key board disappeared, leaving our idiots in the wrong body. Author looked at her hands in shock as did Sora. Author gave out a blood curling scream as she knew Writer was not changing them back for a while.
"YOU FUCKING BITCH!" Author yelled, making Donald and Goofy thing Sora was going crazy "You will pay!"
Not bloody likely but I guess you can try. Sora frowned when he heard the voice. "Who's there?" He asked looking around.
"Oh God, I can't hear her... YES! I can't hear her!" Author said excitedly. "Sora" said pulling her body over.
"We will have to pretend to be each other until the bitch turned us back. My name is Author and act anyway you like since nobody knows me here. Now, lead the way to Leon." Author said before the two walked to where Leon and the others were.
As they walked, Soar kept an eye out for heartless, that could attack t any moment. As they walked, they were surrounded by heartless. Sora tried to bring out his key blade but being in Author's body made him unable. Instead, a whip appeared, making Sora look confuse. Author brought out the key blade and ran at the heartless with her awesome weapon, killing heartless as she ran forward. Donald zapped them with his magic, Donald bashed them with his shield and Sora whipped them away as they followed Author to the house.
As they reached the house, the heartless disappeared from where they had come from, leaving the group right outside the house.
"Does she say everything that happens?" Sora asked Author who nodded wearily.
"And she decides when we turn back so we have to be nice to her" Author said with aa frown.
"Turn who back? Who are you talking about?" Donald asked them confused.
"The writer, she decides everything that happens. The people that need to be changed back are Sora and me. I'm Author not Sora. That bitch changed us and now we are stuck like this until she decides to change us back." Author rubbed her temples as she got a weird look from the two Disney guards. Author jumped as a hand landed on her shoulder. She turned around and saw two girls and a guy. It was Arith, Yuffie and Leon.
"Hey Sora" Leon and the others said happily.
"Not Sora" Author mumbled so nobody could hear.
"I heard that" Sora said to the writer who ignored him because he's weird. "Hey, that's not nice"
"What's she saying?" Sora asked pulling him close.
"She said nobody could hear what you said and then she ignored me and said I was weird." Sora said calmly, hardly believing what he was saying.
"Let's go in and NO WRITERS ALLOWED!" Author said as she put up barrier around the house so I can't tell them what to do, BITCH!
OK, time for the Author to take control. We walked into the house and the others looked at his. Kind of embarrassing for me but nothing I can do, except. A large light appeared, blinding everybody in the room and both Sora and Author changed back to there original bodies.
"Much better" I said as the light faded away and saw I was in my old outfit. "No offense Sora but I'm not very good at being you, I'm too much of a bitch."
Sora looked confused at me and for some reason could still hear the writer and author. It was strange to be writing this and he could hear me, lol, of well.
"Why didn't stop?" Sora asked confused.
Because I said you could hear, get used to it. Well, Leon walked over to a large computer where Cid was sitting, typing stuff up.
"Why don't you three go with Leon up to the room. Show them the computers." Cid said not turning around.
The FOURTH person looked less then amused at this statement and walked forward. I will be going as well.
Cid's chair turned around, forcing him to look at the fourth member.
"Who's this?" Cid asked looked at the girl.
"I'm Author and I was wondering if I could go with them?" Author asked with a sweet smile on her face.
"Sorry, we need conformation from the King saying you can go in." Cid said shacking his head. Author rolled her eyes and she made a note appear in her pocket. She took it out and handed it to Cid. He read it quickly and smiled. "I guess you can go then since the King really wants you to go."
"Come on then" Leon said walked out.
They came out sides house and headed for the room. Fighting heartless as they went.
As they arrived at the room, Author gasped at just how big it was. On the floor below were these people. Author sighed as she stood, looking down at her beautiful characters. Maria, Asha were heaps of flesh and next to them were her sins, Eve and Satan.
"What are they doing here?" Author asked anybody listening.
"I don't know" Leon said seeing the people.
"Writer, get rid of them" Author said angrily. Then all the people disappeared and they walked into the computer room. Author looked at the computer and heard it say..
"USER! BACK AWAY FROM THE CONSOLE. YOU HAVE NO ACCESS"
"Really?" Author asked.
"REALLY!" the computer answered.
"Really" Author asked again.
"REALLY!" The computer said, more annoyed.
"Really?" Author asked, a grin on her face.
"REALLY" the computer said angrily and they kept going as Sora, Donald, Goofy and Leon stared at them.
5 hours later...
"Really?" Author said after have bitten every hand that tried to shut her up.
"WOULD YOU SHUT UP!" The computer asked.
"Why?" Author asked sweetly.
"Because your inferior" the computer said angrily.
"Why?" Author asked again.
"Because your human" the computer asked.
"Really?" Author asked.
"I THINK SO BUT FROM WHAT YOU HAVE SHOWN, YOU MAY NOT BE." the computer said angrily.
"Really?" Author asked excitedly "Because I always wondered."
"YOU INFERIOR HUMAN WILL PAY FOR WASTING TIME" the computer said, kind of delighted with itself.
"How come?" Author asked looked at the sleeping 4.
"WHILE YOU ARGUED WITH ME, I RELEASED HEARTLESS INTO YOUR WORLD!" the ICU said happily.
"Oh, here I thought you were going to release heatless here. Wow, what a relief." Author said happily.
"I DID RELEASE THEM HERE YOU MORON!" the ICU said angrily.
"Then you should have said that. I'm not from this world! I guess I'm going to have to leave then" Author said turning around.
"WHERE ARE YOU GOING USER? THERE IS NO WHERE TO HIDE!" The ICU said, taunting Author.
"I'm going to my world, this place is to dangerous. Writer, this story is almost over. A piece of ...two pieces...three pieces...wait...
"MAKE UP YOUR MIND!" Author said angrily.
Four pieces of paper appeared and a pen. Author walked over and woke Sora, Donald, Goofy and Leon up "can I have your autograph?" She asked kindly. The four wrote there autographs and watched a large hole appear. "Oh, almost forgot, the ICU said he released heartless into your world, good luck with that." Author said, leaving four stunned guys.
Author walked out and saw her dad looking at the spot as if she had just disappeared and reappeared in a second.
"Shall we?" Author said before they continued the walk and he interrogated her about what happened, all in all, a normal day.