Title: Nightmares on Cobin Hill
Author: pipilj
Characters: Peter Burke
Genre, rating: gen, angst,g
Spoilers: season 6 before Neal lets Peter know he is alive
Word count: 400
Summary: Peter does not know Neal is alive when Jones is hurt.
Author's Note: This is for runthecon, for Arargna prompt "Last Time". Unbetad all mistakes are mine.

Gun fire broke out as we breached the perimeter of the warehouse. Suddenly Clinton collapsed, he had been hit. Luckily we got the situation under control and perps were neutralized. I had become a little paranoid of my team's safety after Neal's death.

Clinton was taken to St. James Hospital. The paramedics said it was a superficial wound to his arm. He would be fine. I sat with him somehow holding it together till Clara his girlfriend arrived. I called a cab and headed home I was in no state to drive or work. The last time I was there I was in morgue with Neal's body. Memories of that terrible day Neal died, his still body, the sound of Mozzie despair. Neal's effects being handled over by the ME. Elizabeth collecting me from the hospital as I was inconsolable over Neal's death.

I have not been sleeping too well, after Neal's death. First David Siegel then Neal I felt responsible for both death. Sure Rachael and Keller killed them. But may be I could have prevented. Various permutations and combinations kept playing in my head. If only David had not transferred to New York, if only Neal got his freedom earlier, if only I asked Neal to come with me to the office. If only...

The body in gurney kept changing – sometimes Neal, sometimes Diana, Jones and worst of it El and little Neal. There cold unresponsive bodies, the accusation of Mozzie, June, Theo, Mrs. Jones on my failure to protect my team. It was a never ending cycle. I woke up in cold sweat unable to go back to sleep.

I was seeing a therapist after Elizabeth insistence. In spite of my initial skepticism the therapy season have helped. I am now seeing Dr. Pierce regularly.

Spending time with my son is therapeutic – bathing him, putting him to bed. It's a time I cherish. With my insomnia I took over the nightly feeds I loved these uninterrupted moments with Neal. That night as I sat in the nursery with the munchkin I watched him drift back to sleep smiling slightly as babies do. I felt a twinge of hope after a long time.