The night was chilly, but Clara's skin had a layer of sweat over it. She was having nightmares again.

But not just any nightmares. She was remembering. This certain night she dreamt of Oswin again. Clara woke up at the same moment in every single dream. The moment she died. Oswin had burned, when the daleks destroyed the asylum. She remembered the few seconds of pain, and then she woke up.

She couldn't tell the doctor about these dreams. He'd be worried. He'd say that it was his fault and then be angry for a while. Clara hated to see him angry. She preferred it when he looked like an exited puppy. Or when he'd sometimes cling after her like a lost puppy. When he was angry it was more like a deep void in his eyes. A darkness she couldn't describe. And when he was angry with himself, there was so much guilt and sadness mixed in the darkness as well.

Clara shook her head. She didn't want to think about it. She noticed that even though she wasn't asleep anymore, the dreams sort of kept going. All these lives were in her head, and they didn't disappear. She felt their emotions and thought their thoughts.

"Stop!" Clara said aloud. Thankfully, not loud enough to wake the Maitlands. She looked through her purse to find her phone where she plugged in her headphones and let the sound effects of "fix the sky a little" by "65daysofstatic" distract her from her thoughts.

But Oswin's cries for help kept showing up in her head. She turned the volume up and closed her eyes. Tried to think about something else, but things kept popping up!

She buried her head in her pillow. But what good did that do? It didn't help to fall asleep, because then the memories where just clearer. She had been conscious during the entire transformation. She had felt the step from human to dalek. The transformation had taken about a day and every second had hurt.

Clara did fall asleep, though. She had been woken up by Artie who told her that Mr Maitland had gone to job in a rush. She faked a smile to him as she got out of bed.

None of the echoes disappeared from Clara's thoughts. She didn't even know about half of them. How could she have lived so many lives?

Clara had been in a grumpy mood the entire day. From when she woke up, to when she went to bed again. There was only one thing she looked forward to. Tomorrow was Wednesday. The doctor was coming. She smiled a bit at the thought of new adventures with him. And then, due to the little sleep she got the night before, she quickly became unaware of the things around her.

It was Oswin again. Oswin had always sticked a bit extra to her memories, but this was just horrible! She woke up at seven A.M. with tears in her eyes. They didn't stop raining down her pink cheeks.

For some reason that she couldn't think of at the moment, she stood up and grabbed a pencil sharpener and a bobby pin. She screwed out the razor and threw the screw, bobby pin and remains of the sharpener away. She drew the razor across her wrist and red dots appeared. They grew thicker and thicker for each second and then they started to roll down her arm.

Clara continued to do this until her arm was covered in her blood. Her sheets and parts of her PJ's where red. "What have I done?" She thought "No one can see this."

She quickly changed to a bit oversized light blue sweater with a lace collar and a pair of leggings. The sweater was so thick, the blood couldn't bleed through. Clara then proceeded to change her sheets and throw the old ones and her PJ's in the wash.

She had been so stressed about making sure nobody found out, that she had pushed aside the thoughts of all her past lives, but now that everything was hidden, they came back. This time a headache followed.

She could hear the noise of the TARDIS outside and under a minute, a knock on the door. "Okay, Clara", she thought "he can't know. Don't let him suspect anything." She walked to the door and didn't have to fake a smile when she saw his exited puppy-face