A/N: Hey everyone! So, I was listening to Moana's soundtrack, when this idea popped up in my mind: what would it be like, if "Shiny" was performed by... Ripper Roo? The answer is, a crazy parody! As Ripper Roo is one of my favorite secondary characters, in the Crash Bandicoot series, I think this kind of self-describing, funny (and somewhat creepy) song, really suits his personality. Also, let me mention that this here, isn't related to my Crash story. It's just something I wrote for fun! Gotta admit, though, it was harder to write, than I thought, but I hope the result is worth it. (something I will only find out, if you guys review and share your thoughts with me, get it?)
This parody is set in Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back, when Crash faces Ripper Roo at the waterfall. It is supposed to be something like, Crash gets teleported to the waterfall, where he's greeted by the sight of Ripper Roo singing to himself. Then, the demented kangaroo notices him and addresses the second part of the song to him, while poor Crash is desperately trying to avoid his attacks. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I don't own Crash Bandicoot, or Moana.
*CM*
Crazy!
A parody by Cinerea Mayia
Well, Ripper Roo hasn't always been this freak
I was a poor little joey once
Then, two doctors snatched me up and did their trick
With the Evolvo-Ray, baby!
Was this all that Cortex wanted me to be?
Some loyal minion on his side?
Was I too smart for him? He zapped twice, hurting me!
My brain was fried! And now I'm all...
Crazy!
Like green Nitro crates exploding all around
Hear the sound! So glassy and...
Crazy!
I will sparkle like a blazing TNT
Count to three!
Don't you know?
They go boom-boom-boom!
Wreaking havoc, so take cover! (Or.. recover!)
Ha! Bring the doom, doom, doom!
Can't escape this chain reaction!
Mmm, destruction!
Then comes my laughter!
My insane laughter!
(Laughter!)
Well, well, well
Little Crash wants to relive our previous strife
You pesky teensy-weensy bandicoot!
Oops! You won't be so lucky this time!
Get a life! (Get it?)
You don't spin it like you used to, man!
Not so nice of you to trick me and push me away
Over the great waterfall's edge
But I survived back then, so here's what I'll say
I want revenge! It's time to go...
Crazy!
Thanks to you I'm even crazier than before
Can't ignore! My bounce, it's too...
Crazy!
Send your mask, but he will never be enough!
My skull's too tough!
Crashy man, you can try, try, try
But you can't expect a bandicoot
To beat a kangaroo (Look it up!)
You will die, die, die
Now it's time for me to rip apart
Your aching heart
Far from the girl, who abandoned you
Chasing the shine of these crystals
That makes you feel special
You tried to be tough
But your fur is just not hard enough!
Crashy
Now it's time to make you
Trashy!
Ever seen someone so...
Crazy!
Soak it in 'cause it's the last you'll ever see
C'est la vie, mon ami
I'm so...
Crazy!
Now I'll crush you, so prepare your final plea
Just for me
You'll never be quite as...
Crazy!
You wish you were wild and...
Crazy!
Ahahahahahaha! Ehehehehehahaha!
*CM*
Happy 21st Birthday Crash Bandicoot!