he's not answering , why the hell won't he pick up the phone!? damnit ! this is getting on my last nerve , what could he be doing! his phone is never turned off , so what the hell?! this is so gay , I throw my phone down on the floor , why does last night brother me so much! so what , if he is seeing someone else... no I mean ! it's not like I ever had feelings for the little fag .

I just don't get it , the ass hole just comes and goes , he cheats on him ! yet he makes up lies for him! Kenny had no right doing that , Butters knew god damn well he was a man whore from the start , I-it's not like I care, or if I wanted to be something more to butters.

I'm not a fag! were just friends , I placed my face into the pillow and no matter how many times I push it out of my mind , he comes back to my mind why did he even say yes to that poor fuck!? why do I even care , I shouldn't even give a damn ever since I was in 4th grade , I had been using him or have lied to him ... but now I just feel , like the worse piece of shit on in this whole world , I didn't want to love butters! no I don't ! Butters can get fucked for all I care . but I rather die then let that fucking poor shit fuck his sweet little as- I Mean his ass! no god! what is wrong with me!? but why won't he pick up the phone , the fight we had the other day, damn butters ...I just don't understand what went wrong ?I gave th-that little fag everything! my heart! my soul!

I blushed hard as I thought this , I remembered well I told him the truth , yes I lie from time to time but you got to do it to live in this dumb town . it all started a few weeks ago back before he started dating that ass hole , back when we all would use him and I was still well trying to decide if I was not a fag! because I'm not! but anyways , Butters always would come out with his smile, it made me wonder how can he stand living here?! I sighed , Butters was in a way my best friend , Kenny and me we stopped begin friends way back! but lately , I find myself blushing everytime I think about Butter's, god I should have told him my ..feelings to him sooner , I told him to met me at the lake down town

At first I think the little asshole stood me up! but I was wrong , 'for once' My mouth went dry he was wearing his normal blue sweater but this time in stead of his long jeans , he wore some shorts 'damn my hormons' I blushed hard , but finally found my words " er ..butters we need to talk " he raised his eye at me "were are the others?" I looked down as I shoved my hands into my jeans , damn his cuteness " th-there not here , I came alone" I finally looked up " okay? so what do want" his voice was soft does he even know what he looks like when he makes that smile? " I wanted to say , butters I-I LIKE YOU! a lot! okay! there I said it!" I could feel myself blushing hard , Butters however just looked confused " c-could you repeat that? it sounded like you said your gay?" " I-I'm not! sort of! but that's not the point! " He looked down , then looked up with a sad face "I've fallen for this trick before E-Eric, just -just leave me alone " he turned and walked away , he really thought I was fucking joking!? " it's no lie! " " just l-leave me alone ! haven't you done enough!" I couldn't stop him , it felt like he just killed me , it hurt like fucking hell. the next day that fucking ass hole asked him out , I pinned him against the lockers " why ... just fucking why!" I couldn't hold it back , butters had never looked so scared then he did right then " say something!" I ordered him, I saw tears form in those eyes " Be-because you would never love me" my eyes widen , it hit me hard I let him go and he ran after the piece of shit, the cheating lying ass took him away , not saying I wanted Butters like that! okay maybe I did at one point ! but -but were friends , I think we are ...that little fag left me! even though I told him I loved him first! did that mean nothing?! did all of that just mean fucking nothing!

the next morning , my mom fixed me breakfast her cooking just didn't seem to make feel better like it always did, I mostly just picked at it , I finally grab my keys and headed out , this had to be the worse fucking day of my life , I had my head in my locker " hey Cartman!" that voice , I growled showing they were last asshole's I wanted to see " dude! you look like hell!" Stan looked at me with shocked eyes , the fucking Jew himself was standing right behind him " for god sake's were trying to help!" " fuck you Kyle ! I don't need your Jew fucking Pitty" " shut up Fatass!" " AY! I'm not fat! I'm big boned!" That's when I hear the voice , the one I hated the most " your yelling this early?" He gave that dumb ass smirk, I was going to say something but I saw he had his arm around Butters , I couldn't bear to face him " whatever" I looked away, I could tell he was looking at me with his sad blue eyes " so where were you last night dude? I couldn't get a hold of you! I got this new video game!" Kenny took off his hood shaking his blond fucking hair , show off " sorry man was 'busy' helping my sister's friends with there study" Butters smiled at Kenny buying the lie , god why do you buy into his lies , Stan and kyle already could see though the lie , Klye raised an eye " oh really? I'm sure they pleased you?" for the first time the Jew was trying to catch Kenny in his Lies , HA! FUCK YOU KENNY! the lieing ass kenny rubbed the back of his neck " It wasn't hard , I'm sure they'll get A's" I rolled my eyes as he said that " I-I think that's awful sweet of ya to help your little sister's friends like that!" Butters says sweety still holding Kenny's arm , I felt anger for Kenny no hate! the way he touched butter's it made me sick , Butters shouldn't be treated like that! I should have said something , But it hurt when he would smile at Kenny because he used to give me those smile's , it just wasn't fucking fair Stan finally sighed and looked at me " your not going to say anything" I kept my eyes to the ground , Kyle that fucking jew finally got me talking! "Stan just forget it , he's too much of a soft pussy to stand up for his friend!" I finally grabbed Kyle " shut your god damn mouth! before I break it!" I let go of Kyle and walked away , I wasn't scared! Just upset .Butters would always follow me to find out what was wrong , but he didn't , he should have maybe he doesn't even care about me that way , I thought he would ...how could he? fuck all I wanted was him ! but something happen I felt a hand on my arm , I turned to see a small butters " E-Eric ,I-" " what do you want , can't you see I'm busy" that didn't sound as bad ass , Butters looked down " I just came to ask if anything was bothering you" I looked away , he was so trusting and so small frame " it's nothing " I lied , Butters eyes started to water " p-please Eric don't lie to me , I want to help you " He spoke softly , I glared at him " help? you really want to help!?" he nodded , I removed his hand from my arm " just leave me alone , I don't care if your dating someone else, when I saw you with him , I knew I had lost-" I notice we were holding hands and I let go , oh god I'm blushing ! I turned away " forget it! screw you guys! I'm going home!" I just fucking left , I could hear him starting the water works , I felt my chest hurt He should have seen it coming .

I think the school just gave up on trying to get me to go back , so skipping wasn't so bad It helped me keep my mind off him , I hear my phone go off and look at it to find it was Stan , I look at the text

Text: yo get over here! just got a bag of weed! - Mash

I sighed , I didn't feel like even moving I needed something to take my mind off the fucking fag , and Weed seems to do the trick for that , I started texting back .

Text: Fine -Cartman

I rolled out of Bed and pulled on my black and red Cap, and was out the door , I think my mom ask me something but I ignore her , I looked a head Stan didn't live too far from me , he's smart ass once and while but I guess he's okay. I finally made and before I can even knock on the door Stan open's it " HEY CARTMAN OLD BUDDY!" I raised an eye , he was clearly high and I chuckled " you ass holes getting high with out me?" Stan laughed " you did take your time!" I glared and sighed " smart ass" I swore under my breath , Stan finally let me in I walked upstairs where the Jew and Kenny were sitting down waiting " about damn time! come on Stan pass me a smoke!" I rolled my eyes at Kyle " well fuck you too "

Kenny Just rolled his eyes at this " come on I need a smoke after putting up with today!" Kenny took the joint from Stan taking a few puffs before handing it over to Kyle "what's got you all bitchy?" Stan asked as he took a seat " butters what else?" I raised an eye at him , that fucker better choose his words right! god no! I don't care , I took the Joint fom the jew as he was getting a few puff's in " hey I wasn't done!" " shut up Kyle" my mind began to feel funny , all thought's left me " nice job of the weed Stan" Kenny chuckled , Kyle just glared at Kenny " dude when are you going to dumb butters?" " don't know , I still going to take Bebe out next week , at least I don't have to buy anything for butters! she made me buy her dinner ! god , I swear sometimes I don't even understand how do you put up with Wendy?" Stan just shrugged , Kyle looked to the side " yeah, I wonder why" I really could care less what was wrong with Kyle, I took a few more puffs before handing it off to Stan and he took a deep smoke " Hey Cartman what happen to butters? he isn't answering his phone?" I looked at Kenny " I just skipped class and went home fuck if I know" I layed against the wall , as the image of Butters came into my mind , He was so fucking cute , I wish I could take him and show him how he should be treated " Cartman don't you at least care in a little way about Butters!" Klye must be high , Stan chuckled " maybe he wants to fuck Butters" We all laughed , the only time when we get along it was weird but somehow Kenny had that Cat like smirk , I hated it even though I was high off my ass " tell you what Cartman , I'll tell butters to give you a free blowjob!" I didn't laugh that time , Kenny had burned that Image into my mind " fuck you Kenny" I looked down , such an ass hole