Teenage Red Riding Jacket

Once upon a time, I was Little Red Riding Hood and lived in a cabin in the quiet woods. I would deliver cookies and bread to my grandmother once a week. Now I live in Manhattan, have a riding jacket, motorcycle, tough attitude, and am still delivering things to my grandmother. Lovely.

"Rachel!" my mother called. I shouted back "What?" even though I knew "what."

"Could you deliver this to Grandma?"

I don't know why she bothers asking, I'm going to do it. To be polite, I suppose.

"Sure, mom," I said as I took the bottle of vinegar from her. I went to grab my helmet (always safety conscious) but she shouted again, "Take the subway, honey." I rolled my eyes at the "honey" part. "It's raining so hard and I don't like seeing my baby sick," she continued, walking into the entryway. I rolled my eyes again, more like you don't want to take the time out of your "me time" to go deliver the crap to your own mother. Whatever.

I said the last part out loud and dashed out the door before she could reprimand me. As you can see my mother and I have a great relationship, it's just peachy as my grandmother would say.

I've been living here for seven years and was well aware of the kind of…people who rode the subway. The first time I rode it my mother was frantic with worry when I didn't come home after being gone for several hours. I was really still at Grandma's which she found out when she called. Grandma had decided to teach me some self-defense when she found out I was riding the tube by myself. Anyway, most of the people who ride the subway are what I call "the regulars" and they know to stay away from me.

A few years after my self-defense lesson I got to demonstrate my skills to some unfortunate prick who decided he wanted to cop a feel. He seemed to think I was a helpless little girl that could be taken advantage of easily. So much for that thought. No one gave me so much as a sideways glance from then on.

As I got off the subway down in the lower east side of Manhattan, about two blocks from my grandmother's apartment, a group of three guys surrounded me. Apparently they weren't some of the regulars who'd seen my demonstration all those years ago. In fact, I knew they weren't. They were part of a gang and gangs never leave their part of town. That's where they're most powerful. I pushed my way through them and started walking towards Grandma's.

They followed a few yards behind me.

Finally, half a block from her apartment building the leader, you could tell from the way the other two mirrored his actions but were delayed a few seconds, made a move. He ran up behind me, spinning me around, yanking my purse from my hand. I rolled my eyes thinking, I hope you need the tampons as much as I do.

"Seriously?" I asked him, exasperated. "I don't have time for this. My mom's serving dinner at 5:30 and my boyfriend's coming over at 7." He sneered, which looked odd considering he was missing half of his teeth. "I don't care what you don't has time for missy. My son need a playmate." He grabbed my arm, preparing to drag me to his "son." I rolled my eyes. Again. Twisting out of his grip was easy, as was grabbing my purse in the same movement. I started walking away and heard him running after me. When he was just two steps behind me, I spun around and brought the vinegar bottle down over his head.

CRASH!

The guy fell on the ground gripping his head. "That's what you get for being stupid!"

Right before my eyes he dissolved into tears, he was positively bawling! The door to my grandmother's apartment opened and she ran out. Apparently my bottle breaking ceremony hadn't been that quiet because as I looked around to see her running I noticed several of the residents peaking through their curtains. Oops?

When my grandma approached the scene you'll never believe what she did.

She pulled the guy into a hug! She started comforting him saying, "It's alright, Wolf, it's alright" and "You're not stupid, Wolf, you're a smart boy."

"What the fu- what are you doing!" I yelled (thank god I had caught myself before I swore) "Shh, Rachel," Grandma told me, then to Wolf, "Are you alright now?" He nodded, got up, wiped his nose, and disappeared around the block with his cronies. My grandmother then turned to me and explained that he was in her support group and had emotional and self-esteem problems. I shook my head, trying to process this.

"Whatever," I muttered. Louder I said, "Apparently you can't escape wolves no matter where you go. They're in forests AND in cities!" She laughed. I waved goodbye and headed home. "Did you get there alright?" my mother asked, hearing me slam the door. I thought about telling her the truth but decided against it. "Yeah," I told her as I plopped down on the couch.

I didn't feel like moving again.