Moment in Time

This just came in my head one night…..it was late. It was like brain vomit, I just had to keep typing before I knew it was three in the morning. Oh well, I hope you like. Enjoy.

Sometimes I just wished that things would just go the right way, that everything around me wasn't out of my control. That I could hold on to the time where everything was right, and that moment would be perfect; perfect for me at least

what happened the day that Kouji brought Kouichi to meet their father, did [father's name] welcome him with open arms? Or did everything go downhill from there on?

Disclaimer: I not own Digimon. I don't, I don't!

//

It's nerve-raking meeting someone for the first time, I can't take the suspense of it all. It felt like my body was full of tiny little butterflies wanting to leapt out of my chest. Those butterflies were making me want to vomit on the spot, but I kept it in; for Kouji. Kouji was the only reason I was here, Mom wouldn't allow me to see him. It wasn't that she was afraid, not at all, its just that some hurdles [such as these] were left un-jumped in divorces. Besides I didn't want to do this, especially because of the way I was feeling at that moment.

But Kouji was persistent, he tugged and pulled me along, all the way to the gold plated name plate which adorned every home around here, with the respective names. As soon as I saw the name Minamoto, I wanted to run, I couldn't take it anymore. "Kouji…..do..do you really think this is a good…a good idea" I protested

He stopped, "what do you mean?"

"I mean….." my hair hid my eyes from him, embarrassed at the thought that crossed my mind. "I mean, do you really think he'll….."

"accept you?" Kouji finished for me. I looked up at him, I couldn't believe it he knew exactly what I was thinking, he always knew, we were twins after all. "yeah"

"don't worry so much, it'll be great, we can be a family" he smiled, one of the rare ones

"o…okay" I smiled hesitantly back.

Kouji continued on, I held my breath as he pulled out his key. I was about to bolt when he turned the lock in place, and I wanted to scream when the door swung away from the threshold. We both walked in at the same time, taking our shoes off, and heading toward the living room. Kouji sat me down, and asked if I wanted anything, I said no.

"It will be okay, Nii-san, I know it" he told me, but I wasn't listening I was staring at my hands counting the small wrinkles, and etchings in my knuckles. He placed his hand on my knuckles making my miscount.

"Nii-san, relax" easy for him to say, "Kouji, do you, I mean are you okay with this?"

"what do you mean?" he asked for the second time that day.

"you aren't a little worried, I am…I'm scared" I admitted

"to be honest with you…" before he could finish the door creaked opened

A small voice, female by the tone of it, "I'll just put this away for you,"

Another voice cut her off, "okay" it sounded tired, weary almost. Kouichi's stomach sank from the sound.

Kouji gave his brother a small wink and cut his dad off from heading toward his room. "Dad, I have to tell you something…" he paused "well, show up something."

"Kouji, what's wrong?" the voice coming a bit closer, Kouji was pulling his dad to the living room.

I didn't want to do this anymore, I wanted to cry. I held my fist tightly so tightly that I was drawing a bit of blood. It felt like I sinking into the cushions themselves when Kouji came into view, 'his' father in tow. I plastered a smile on face.

He looked like anyone's father; tired with bags under the eyes from a hard days work, graying hair from excess stress from the task of everyday life. Normal. But I didn't see anything of that, all I saw, all I thought about at that moment was how surprised he looked. How utterly shocked……and one thought popped into my mind at that moment: Why?

Why was he shocked did he think I was dead?, why was he shocked didn't he keep in contact with my mother?, Why after all this time did he not feel what I was feeling at this moment? I couldn't hold it in anymore, "D…Dad?" I held my breath.

He looked like he couldn't answer his mouth slightly open, Kouji had to intervene to make him speak. "Dad, it's Kouichi….he's here"

All of a sudden that shocked expression turned into one of indifference. It was like he didn't care that I was standing there, his long lost son. Everything inside me turned to anger, I had to keep it in; Kouji was there after all. So I said something. "Dad, it's really is me" I paused

He still didn't say anything, it felt like forever, then with a small nudge by Kouji he responded, "Kouichi you look so big…"

I wanted to hit him, is that all he could say, the anger was building. I bit my tongue to keep it at bay. Was that all he could say after all this time?

Satomi walked in at that time, "oh….." a look at me "Hello" she looked just as shocked as he was. I didn't know what to say to her, she was the one that caught his eye after the divorce. I couldn't look at her, without crying. So I stared at my knuckles again. Kouji saw this and came to me, pulling me toward another room.

"Dad were going to my room" Kouji called back as we entered his room. It was small, too clean. A small desk; I noticed with a picture of our mother. I guitar sat near the doorway. His bed was made and he placed me there, I continued it stare at my knuckles.

"Kouichi, are you okay" Kouji asked. Why would he asked me that? He touched my hand again, "Kouichi, please say something" he paused "you're crying…." I didn't even notice that, when did that happen. I touched my cheek to confirm what Kouji had just said. And yes there was tears, why am I crying?

"Kou..Kouji why….why couldn't he say something other that?" I asked why a lot today….

"I really don't know, maybe it's stress, from work"

I don't believe that, he's just……not the person I thought he would be. Maybe I thought he cared.

"you know Dads can be that way"

Kouji was trying to make me feel better, inside I could feel that he didn't understand what was going on in his father's head. He wanted answers too, I just didn't want to start a fight. But Kouji was all too ready. "come on" he pulled me downstairs. And took me back to the living room, where he and Satomi was seating.

"Dad, what's going on, this is Kouichi, you know your son" Kouji asked

But he just sat there staring at Kouji, like the words coming out of his mouth were foreign, I wanted to wrench him from his very stop and do something….But I couldn't. I wouldn't want to hurt anyone, Kouji and Mom especially. So I stayed quiet as my brother interrogated our 'father'.

"Dad, answer me, what. Is. Going. On?" Kouji repeated.

But he still wouldn't answer, without coaxing from Satomi, a little nudge. That my heart hurt for some reason…..I didn't know why.

"nothing is going on Kouji….you just surprised me today….Kouichi, you….you look just like….." he stopped, I knew what he was going to say though.

"yeah, I know, Dad"

He didn't know what to say after that, what could he say? He abandoned my mother, for another woman, separated twins. What could he say, after all that. I had to say something though, but it would hurt someone…..

"why Dad……" I asked "why did you do this to mom….." why didn't I stop after that "why did you leave me and mom for her" I couldn't stop " why did you hurt us so much, broke up our family…." I didn't stop "why did you choose Kouji!" I was screaming now, and crying. The tears wouldn't stop. Right then and there my anger exploded, I wanted to run, like before. But I couldn't, I didn't, I wanted to know the answers that's why.

I gasped for breath, and stared at my feet waiting for an answer. It came in the form of tears…..he was crying too. But why, because of what I said? Because of himself? Because he was feeling the pain I was feeling? I didn't know. He didn't answer.

Kouji took me back to the room after my outburst, I wonder if what I said hurt him, like I thought it would.

"I'm sorry Kouji, I had to know"

"it's okay" he answered "it's okay Ni-san, I would want to know too"

I can't believe him, why isn't he upset?

"I'm not mad… because if I were in your shoes I would want to know, everything…" he read my mind again, I just had to smile. So I hugged him instead. He was surprised, especially when I started crying again.

"I….re…rea..really want…ed to know, I c…co..couldn't help myself, I'm sorry!!!!!!" I said between sobs.

He comforted me until, I stopped.

Which wasn't long, we both went downstairs, not to confront our father but to leave. I was done, I got what wanted….I just wanted to ask those questions, get it out of system. So it wouldn't plague me anymore. Besides mom was probably worried right now, I needed to get home. I said my goodbyes, put on my shoes, and walked away from the Minamoto house.

What I wouldn't help to go back in time, to see those answers for myself. To get the answers for myself, to go back to the moment where Dad made the choices he did. The moment where he torn up everything for this moment in time. That moment in time.

//

I know the ending sucked…I'm sorry.

I read this twice so no grammatical errors….hopefully.

I'm back, I won't be continuing any of stories before this one. So sorry to all the reviewers.

I hope you like this please review! :3