"On Behalf of the Kitties"
The candles set the tone for this romantic affair. Never before had there been a more beautiful set up; a scene more fitting for two lovers in heat. With the hazy glow of light softening their features and the fragrant aroma of lust in the air, Alphonse Elric swore he had never been so in love. Colonel Mustang had just entered the room. His eyes peered across the veranda, searching, searching for his love. His eyes fell heavily upon Alphonse, and instantly brightened: There he was, his handsome lover, all shimmering and glowing in the light, in his metal armor suit. A light blush crept across Mustang's cheeks. Oh, how he had waited for this moment for far too long! He crossed the room, meeting Al at a small table. Before he could sit down, Al hurriedly came over and pulled out the seat for him. "I thought this would be nice," said Al, "a quiet dinner between me and you." Roy smiled coyly.
"Indeed, this is very nice. I have long awaited this day, Alphonse."
Al gasped. Mustang had never before called him by his full name. The sound of his name, tumbling forth from Roy's lips, enticed him. He longed to hear it again. Before he could respond, Roy's face lit with excitement. "I almost forgot! I brought you a gift." He pulled out a small envelope from within his coat pocket and handed it to Al.
"What's this?" Al mused. He tore open the envelope with care, and was astonished to find a certificate inside proclaiming him to be the proud father of three precious kittens. "But, Roy!" he exclaimed.
Roy placed a single finger upon Al's grill, and said, "Hush.
"I stopped by the animal shelter earlier this day and couldn't help thinking of you when I found these fellows. I knew you'd be the perfect companion for them; though, I can't help feeling selfish and wondering whether I'd make a more fit companion."
Roy fidgeted with the silverware on the table and his eyes roamed the room, looking anywhere but Al's. And then, in a flash, his eyes pierced into Al's, burrowing deep into his soul. A funny sensation overtook Al; he felt light and fuzzy.
Had… Had he just …? He'd been eyefucked!
"But, but Roy! I was a virgin!" he protested.
"Excuse me?"
A woman came forward to take their orders. "What would you like tonight, Messrs.'?" Her presence went unnoticed, for Al had fled from the restaurant, crying, "How could you?"
And Roy had been left to his tears.