inspired by — /watch?v=w_CuXlC762I&list=UUTOzk4HvSdSlDL_zA1u-_qg&index=2&feature=plcp
hearts get broken
a scott & bailey fanfic.
She's sick of the mixed messages, one minute she's wanted and the next she isn't. She understands Gill's insecure, hell she'd be insecure if she had a twat of an ex husband who shagged anything with a pulse.
It just hurts to know that the woman you love doesn't fully trust you — or want you.
/
She's sat at the table in the club with Janet. Their table is covered to the brim with empty glasses and they're both laughing hysterically about something one of them has said. They stand up, unsteady on their feet and link arms before leaving, heading in the direction of Rachel's place.
They have a drunken conversation as they walk, a conversation that only makes sense to them because they're both pissed out of their heads. They reach Rachel's place and she's leant against the front door, rustling through her pockets trying to find the keys.
"Fucks sake." She mutters before finding them in her right pocket. As she picks them up, she drops them to the floor, sighs and bends down. Finding the right key for the door, she puts the key in the door and opens it with more force than necessary.
She falls through the front door, the door banging against the wall and Janet bursts out laughing. Rachel giggles and puts her finger to her lips as an order to silence Janet but it doesn't work as she laughs louder.
Rachel closes the door and leans against it. It's only then that she realises the fuzzy feeling she's getting inside her stomach. She always did get this fuzzy feeling whenever she was in Janet's company. And before she can even think about what she's doing, she kisses her.
/
Guilt. She's guilty. They shagged less than an hour ago and yet she already regrets their night together. She's cheated. She's shagged Janet behind Gill's back. Oh god, what a mess.
She picks up the phone, despite the voice in the back of her hand telling her, ("Don't make calls when your pissed.") She won't listen to it, since when did Rachel ever do anything sensible?
"I can't do this." She tells Gill down the phone. She really can't do it anymore. She doesn't want to go home and cry herself to sleep for all the times Gill's let her down. Cried for the times that could've happened if only Gill had trusted her.
In an ironic way, Gill was right not to trust her. Her back had been turned for five minutes and Rachel's already shagged someone else.
"I'm shagging her." She blurts out. She regrets it almost immediately but it's too late to do anything. She puts the phone down, cries herself to sleep and knows that tomorrow is going to be awkward.
/
She gets a phone call first thing in the morning, "I need to talk to you — not on the phone." Gill tells her. She remembers last night's drinking, her drunken one night stand with her best friend, her drunken phone call and confession.
She follows Gill into the office. As she closes the door, Gill tells her that she got a drunken phone call last night. She says that if it's true, that she did shag someone else, she wouldn't only lose Gill; she'd lose her job too.
All Rachel can do is lie.
She lies her way out of it by promising there was nobody and she doesn't know why she said such a thing. Gill doesn't believe her, she believes Rachel was telling the truth when she told her she was shagging someone.
Gill doesn't suspect that it would be the friend she's known for over eighteen years.
/
"We're telling Gill."
"No." Rachel answers back. They can't tell Gill. They can't. If they do, she'll lose her job. She'll hurt Gill and that's the last thing she wanted. She loves Gill, honestly she does. She's just — confused, doesn't know where she stands with the woman.
Not to mention, the small factor that she's in love with Janet too.
She sits by the sink, tears streaming down her cheeks as she realises that she's hurt both the people she loves. She's hurt Gill by cheating, she's hurt Janet by making promises she can't keep. She's hurt herself because nothing would ever be the same again.
(Friendship's shattered, hearts broken.)
jottings — i don't attempt to write fanfiction from a video because nine times out of ten, i get it wrong and it turns into a massive fuck up. however, i actually liked the thought of a love triangle between Rachel/Gill/Janet so here is my shocking attempt at writing it.