I'll Keep Singing This Lie If You'll Keep Believing It
A/N: Welcome to a new story! My original intent for this story was to basically have the same plot as I Wanna See Your Real Smile because I like the idea behind it but the actual writing is shit. Well, it turned into something else that I like better. You will probably notice some slightly similar themes if you've read the other story, and if you haven't read it please for the love of god don't because the writing in that story makes me want to claw my eyes out of my skull. In a way I'm grateful that I started writing when I was younger (even though the writing itself is very cringe-worthy) because I stuck with it and I'm a better(ish) writer because of it. Anyway, I hope my old readers enjoy this and maybe if you're a new reader this story will catch your attention. Enjoy!
Warnings for a lot of swearing, sexual-ish content but not really, drama, angst, and jokes about Donald Trump's hair.
"No Nick, mustard is the most disgusting thing in the entire world. It tastes like shit."
Nick rolled his eyes fondly. "Tell me Jeffery how do you know what shit tastes like?"
Jeff smiled devilishly. "I've kissed you, remember?"
"Ooooh," Nick laughed. "You must be proud of that one you shit head." Nick pushed Jeff down on their bed and sat on his legs. "Say you're sorry you meanie."
Nick and Jeff had a very interesting relationship, and they fucked around with each other like this all the time. It was all in good fun, and Nick knew not to take Jeff too seriously when it came to the banter.
But in that moment something clicked inside of Jeff and Nick saw panic flash across his eyes. "Nick get off, please!" he cried.
The second Nick realized Jeff was panicking he got off of him. "Baby I'm sorry, I was just playing around. What was that about?"
Jeff shook his head and wiped away the tears that frustratingly managed to break through. "Nothing, I'm sorry that I yelled at you," Jeff whispered, getting up.
"No Jeff, baby please tell me. You can't have a reaction like that and just expect me to drop it," Nick begged, following Jeff. "Jeff has somebody ever hurt you?"
Jeff shook his head quickly. "Nick it's not like that, not like you mean. Look I don't want to talk about it, okay?"
Nick turned Jeff around and made the younger look at him. "Jeffery please tell me," he pleaded, looking Jeff in the eyes.
Jeff refused to look Nick in the eyes and he tried to pull away.
"Jeff," Nick said sternly.
Jeff started crying when Nick wouldn't let him go. "Nick please drop it," he begged with tears falling down his face.
Nick's face softened and he pulled Jeff into a hug. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. You don't have to tell me. Calm down. I love you."
"I love you too," Jeff whispered. They dropped it for the rest of the night.
Nick and Jeff had known each other since high school and they started dating towards the end of their sophomore year. They were in college now and still happily together.
But Nick noticed funny things about Jeff. There were certain things he was closed off about. It didn't makes sense.
"Have I mentioned how much I can't stand my parents?" Nick groaned.
"I fucking hate my parents," Jeff mocked in the most dramatic impression of an angsty teenager. "But no, what is it now?"
"My mom just called me. She scheduled a dentist's appointment for me, it's on Thursday. Not that I care but for god's sake, I'm almost 19. I can make my own dentist's appointment," Nick complained.
Jeff flinched and started to grow fidgety and uncomfortable, and Nick didn't understand why.
"You okay?"
Jeff nodded quickly and tried to compose himself. "Yeah, I'm just tired," he excused lamely. He smiled reassuringly at Nick. "Stop complaining, she just cares about you. Now I'm going to take a shower, I have class in an hour."
Nick grinned cheekily. "Mind if I join?"
Jeff shook his head. "Not right now mister," he said, locking the bathroom door behind him.
"Tease!" Nick shouted.
A few weeks later they were at some frat party, and they'd been drinking a little because you know college. Nick hadn't drank a lot because he was keeping an eye on Jeff and letting him have a little fun, and Jeff was the most adorable drunk he'd ever seen. Jeff was so drunk right now that everything was hilarious and he was laughing his ass off.
"Jeff you're ridiculous, you remind me of one of those hyenas from The Lion King."
Apparently that statement in itself was hilarious because Jeff was laughing so hard that he couldn't breathe. "Nicky stop it or I'm gonna throw up on you!" Jeff warned in between laughs.
Nick just shook his head. "That wasn't even that funny you nut. You're so fucking drunk right now, what am I going to do with you?" He looked his adorable drunken boyfriend over and just smiled fondly. "You know I think I like drunk Jeff. He doesn't care about what anyone thinks of him. This is the only time I ever see you laugh without covering your mouth."
Jeff stopped laughing and frowned a little.
"Aw no what's wrong baby?"
Jeff shook his head and started crying a little. "I don't like it."
"Nooo honey what don't you like? Don't cry you're okay," Nick said, pulling Jeff onto his lap. "I think we should leave soon honey."
"My smile. Yours is so pretty and perfect. I don't like mine."
Nick frowned. "Well I promise you that I love your smile a lot. It's unique and cute, nobody else has one like yours. Besides, who said you had to have straight teeth to have a pretty smile? That's stupid."
"Nuuu, I still don't like it," Jeff argued.
"You know you could get braces, or something like that. Invisalign, or braces on the back of your teeth so nobody can see. You should be able to feel comfortable with yourself honey," Nick suggested.
Jeff shook his head. "No Nicky, that's scary."
"No it's not you goof. I could go with you if you wanted."
Jeff started crying again. "No Nick."
"Alright, alright. Never mind. Let's get back to our apartment, I think you've had enough to drink for tonight."
He dropped that too. Nick helped Jeff back to the car and they went to sleep. Jeff didn't even remember their conversation the next day.
Nick loved Jeff to pieces but he was a very strange creature. Sometimes weird things would make him upset or put him in a foul mood, but he refused to talk about it. He was usually an adorable ball of sunshine and cute hand-muffled giggles. Jeff was generally a very happy person but when his down spells hit they hit hard, and Nick noticed.
"Jeff c'mon baby what's wrong? I tell you everything but you keep so much shit to yourself. Communication is supposed to be a two way street and I want you to come to me, you know? Please tell me what's up."
Jeff shook his head. "I don't want to talk about it. It's stupid and you're not going to understand, nobody does. It doesn't matter, alright? Let's just drop it, please."
"What does that even mean? What won't I understand, Jeff?"
"Nick," Jeff begged, trying to get him to stop talking about it.
"I'm not going to drop it, Jeffery. It's not fair that I tell you everything and you're still so closed off. You don't trust me and I need you to if you want this relationship to work."
"Nicky, please don't be like that. You know I trust you but it's something that I don't feel comfortable talking about; I don't talk about it," Jeff struggled to explain.
"Then make an exception, for me. Please honey. It's bothering you and I want to help." Nick pulled Jeff into his lap and pulled him close. "I'll tell you anything you want to know about myself if you tell me about what's bothering you, okay?"
Jeff gave into Nick's hold and snuggled into him, feeling safe and protected. He was like a cat because he melted right into physical affection. "That's not a fair deal, you already tell me everything."
Nick laughed. "I know. How about you take a page from my book?" he suggested sarcastically.
"Nicky can we just cuddle?" Jeff pleaded.
"Only if you tell me about the thing," Nick countered.
Jeff was getting desperate to avoid this conversation, so he decided to pull the sexy times card. He turned over in Nick's lap so he was facing him and started kissing his lips, it quickly grew heated because he needed Nick to get distracted. Jeff slid his tongue into Nick's mouth after a few sweet kisses and they both started breathing heavy. It worked for about a minute and a half.
"Mmmm... Jeff," Nick pulled away despite himself. "Seriously, we need to talk. You're not going to get out of this by being cute."
Jeff pouted, looking genuinely hurt. "Something else tells me that talking about my feelings isn't at the top of your to-do list right now. I'm sitting on your lap, remember? I can feel your-" he didn't get the chance to finish that statement because Nick cut him off.
"I'm serious you sexy little shit. Talk now, sexy times later. Got it?" It took quite a bit of self control but Nick pushed Jeff off of his lap.
"If you drop it I'll give you a blow job."
"Jeff!" Nick scolded. "I'm. Serious."
Jeff sighed. These tactics weren't going to work. Time to lie. "I um... I just had a rough day, alright? I'm struggling with my math class and it's stressing me out."
Nick studied his boyfriend's face closely. "I know you're bad at math but that's not what this is about. I can tell you're lying to me Jeff. Just tell me the truth, please? Tell me and I'll stop bugging you about it."
"Ugh," Jeff groaned. "No you won't. It'll only give you more reason to bug me. If I tell you you are not allowed to bug me about it, not even a little. Pinky swear?" he held out his pinky in similar style to a child.
Nick looked at Jeff skeptically but interlocked his pinky with Jeff's in a pinky swear. Only Jeff didn't see that he crossed his fingers behind his back, it didn't count now. If Jeff was going to be childish enough to make him pinky swear then he was allowed to cross his fingers and invalidate the pinky swear. "Alright, I pinky swore. Now spill."
Jeff crossed his arms. "Nicky you're gonna make fun of me."
"I won't Jeff, I promise," Nick assured. They went back and forth a few times, Jeff making more excuses and Nick assuring him they weren't valid.
"Ugh! Fine. Fine. It's stupid... but um... one of my..." Jeff started.
"One of your what, Jeff?" Nick inquired.
"One of my teeth," Jeff divulged in distress. Well there was no taking it back now, he said it. Before Nick could say anything Jeff explained further. "It kind of hurts a tiny bit, but it's fine. I'm fine. It's not even that bad and honestly it could be worse, and I mean it'll go away and it's not a big deal. It doesn't matter, alright? I don't want to talk about it anymore. End of discussion. You pinky swore you wouldn't bug me about it and now you have to leave me alone." Jeff's face was red from embarrassment and he was flustered. He didn't want Nick to get a word in, he didn't want to hear what he had to say. Nick opened his mouth like he was going to say something but Jeff cut him off. "Seriously, I don't want to talk about it. Please don't say anything, I don't want to hear anything you have to say. I'm gonna go take a shower now." He tried to get up to avoid the rest of this conversation, but Nick followed him.
"Hey! Jeff, calm down please. I won't say anything about it but you look like you're going to have a panic attack. Look at how badly you're shaking. Come here, sit down for a minute." Nick pulled Jeff back to the sofa and made him sit down. "Calm yourself you cute little nut. Now tell me what's wrong."
Jeff felt a little better once Nick said he wouldn't say anything about it, but he had a feeling that wouldn't last long. "Nothing's wrong," he sniffled.
"Are you crying?"
"Maybe."
Nick ran his hands through Jeff's hair to make him feel better. "Jeff why is a toothache such a big deal? Just make a den-"
Jeff shivered involuntarily. "Niccckkk, noooo. You said you wouldn't bug me about it, you pinky swore."
"I crossed my fingers. It doesn't count," Nick grinned sheepishly. He made Jeff look at him. "Look. This isn't a big deal. I'll make the appointment for you myself."
Jeff shook his head, trying his best not to start crying again. "You will not," he said sternly.
"Why not, Jeff?"
"Because Nick, I'm scared. Haven't you caught onto that by now?" Jeff tried to get him to understand.
"Well I'm scared of spiders and I still kill them for you, you know? I learned to deal with it," Nick reasoned.
"No Nick, this isn't comparable to that. I have a phobia, it's not that simple. In psychology a phobia is classified as such if it significantly impacts your life, like if you avoid certain situations or uh, places, because of it. It's by definition a phobia so I can't just brave through this because that's not how it works." Jeff was trying hard to make Nick understand.
"Alright. I understand. How can I help?" Nick asked genuinely.
"You can't. I don't want your help. Not to sound harsh but I don't want to deal with this. That's why I didn't want to tell you, because I knew you'd want to help."
Nick furrowed his brows. "But you have to. Not to be the bear of bad news but if it's a cavity it's just going to get worse over time and hurt more. It's not going to go away you know. Teeth don't heal."
"Yeah, thanks for that reminder," Jeff grunted. "I know how it works, Nick. But I don't care. It'll be fine."
"It won't be fine until you deal with it, Jeffery. You're being ridiculous. It's literally just going to get worse and if you wait too long you could need a root canal or lose your tooth altogether. Do you really want that?"
"Of course I don't Nick, but you don't understand how hard this is for me. Now stop, you're scaring me."
Jeff was trembling again and Nick felt bad. "I'm sorry," he apologized. "Let's talk about this. Why are you so scared?"
"Dunno," Jeff mumbled.
"You're lying but whatever, don't tell me. You have to get this checked out either way. I'll schedule you an appointment with my dentist. Just to see what's going on, alright?" Nick offered.
"No Nick," Jeff said sternly. "Have you not been listening? I don't want to deal with this."
"As a matter of fact I have been. You say that you have a phobia, and the way to cure a phobia is to introduce you to it in small steps. I'll even go with you, okay? It's easy. Let's just start out with a check up," Nick reasoned.
"Dammit Nick I said no," Jeff snapped. He hardly ever got angry so that outburst was unexpected. "I don't want your help. Don't do anything, I'm serious. I'll deal with it."
"If 'dealing with it' means avoiding it at all costs then yeah I'd say you're dealing with it pretty well," Nick inquired.
Jeff glared dangerously at his boyfriend. "I'm finished talking about it." He stood up.
Nick sighed. "Jeff, where are you going?"
"I don't know," he said, slamming the door to the apartment behind himself.
Nick didn't go after him. He thought about the situation for a few minutes before deciding that Jeff wasn't going to deal with this himself. He pulled out his phone and dialed a number. "Hi, I'd like to schedule an appointment."
Ever since Nick found out about Jeff's little issue Jeff stopped hiding how much pain he was actually in. This was somewhat a plus because that meant Jeff could complain endlessly, but the downside was it resulted in getting an earful from Nick.
Jeff was laying in Nick's lap on the sofa. "Nicky it hurts, and Advil isn't helping anymore," he pouted.
"It won't hurt anymore if you get it fixed," Nick inquired tiredly. He loved Jeff to death and genuinely felt bad for him, but the constant complaining was getting old and Jeff refused to even think about going to the dentist. Little did he know Nick already had the appointment in place, now it was just a matter of convincing him to go.
"Don't wanna," Jeff whined.
"You're not allowed to complain if you refuse to do anything about it," Nick stated sternly. "Jeff, you really need to consider getting this taken care of."
Jeff just shook his head and mashed his hand into his lower jaw area harder. At this point he was whimpering and crying and just all around miserable. "It's throbbing now and that doesn't mean anything good. It's definitely getting worse and I'm scared, Nicky."
Nick sighed, but ran a hand through Jeff's hair in attempts to make him feel a little better. "Please let me make you an appointment Jeff, before this gets any worse."
"It's already worse," Jeff added sadly.
"How about I make myself an appointment and you can watch, okay? You'll see this stuff isn't scary and it'll make you feel a little better. Then you'll be one step closer to getting your tooth fixed," Nick suggested. Jeff only shook his head again. "Damn you Jeff, come on I'm trying to help. Look, I just remembered I have a biannual appointment next week and I'm making you come with me."
"Nick, nooooo," Jeff whined. "I don't want to go with you. It's scary."
"It's not. Besides, I'll be the one in the chair. I'm not asking you to do anything but watch," Nick reasoned.
"I don't want to watch," Jeff continued. "Nick would you stop bugging me about it?"
"Hey, you're the one who brought this up. You were literally in my lap sobbing a few minutes ago." Nick thought for a second or so before getting an idea. "If you don't even try then I'm going to tell all of our friends about this and embarrass the shit out of you."
Jeff sat up and gaped. "Nick you would not!"
"I am so serious Jeffery. You have to at least try."
"You're essentially blackmailing me Nick! You can't do that!"
"I can and I will if you keep up this stubborn ass act. I'll post about it on Facebook or something and tell all of our friends to spam you," Nick said seriously.
"I hate you," Jeff grumbled with his arms crossed. "You wouldn't do it. You're not that mean and you know how embarrassing this is for me."
Nick raised his eyebrows in question before he took out his phone and started typing something. He pressed a few buttons and then set down his phone.
Jeff's eyes widened in horror when his phone buzzed. He looked at his notifications to find that Nick kept his word and tagged him in a status. "DAMMIT NICK DELETE IT RIGHT THIS SECOND YOU JACKASS!" He got up and tried to get Nick's phone from him, but Nick refused and it turned into a game of keep away.
"I'll delete it if you agree to come with me to my appointment," Nick said laughing as he continued to keep his phone from Jeff.
"It's not funny! Seriously Nick delete it!" It wasn't funny to Jeff in the slightest and at this point he was crying in a panic. "Nicky, please!" he begged.
Nick felt bad when Jeff started to cry but he wasn't giving up yet. "All you have to do is say you'll come with me Jeff."
"Fine!" Jeff agreed, he'd say anything to get Nick to remove the post at this point.
Nick smiled. "See? That wasn't so hard. I'll delete it now." He showed Jeff as he deleted the post. "You were the only person who could see the post by the way. I'm sorry I scared you. I'd never actually do something like that."
Jeff stopped crying but he was still pissy because of what just happened. "That was mean."
"I'm sorry. I'm a shit head, but if it means anything I really am trying to help." Nick scooted closer to Jeff on the sofa and put his head on his shoulder. "I love you," he said sweetly.
Jeff glared at Nick. "You're on my shit list," he countered, "but I still love you." No matter how angry Jeff or Nick were they always said I love you back. It was sort of their thing even though it was cheesy as hell. An 'I love you' was never left hanging in the air, even if it was a casual 'that's why I love you'. It was always said back no matter what.
"You're gonna be okay," Nick assured lamely.
"That reassurance sounds as fake as Donald Trump's hair."
Nick laughed lightly at Jeff's joke. "It's just the dentist Jeffery, I promise you'll be fine."
"Ugh, stop saying the word," Jeff whined.
"Are you serious? It's just a word. What else am I supposed to call it?"
"I don't know... torture dude seems reasonable. TD for short so other people don't know what we're talking about." Jeff decided.
"That's ridiculous Jeff, it's not torture. I'm not calling it that."
"You're boring. Fine. It can stand for tooth doctor, would that make you feel better?"
"You're still ridiculous. I'm calling it a dentist. Maybe if I say it enough you won't flinch every time you hear the word."
Jeff only responded by glaring at his boyfriend.
"Jeff c'mon, you said you'd come with me."
"Only because you blackmailed me," Jeff reminded.
"Blackmail with good intentions."
After some more arguing somehow Nick got Jeff in to the car and he started driving. "I'm sorry that you're so scared honey. Is there anything you want to ask me? Maybe I can make you feel a little better since I've been the bad guy lately."
"I don't know. Have you... um... this is kinda a weird question but have you ever had a cavity before?" Jeff asked sheepishly.
Nick thought for a moment. "Yeah I've had a couple in the past. I was young, like twelve or something. I remember my second set of molars came in sideways and I couldn't really clean them properly, so I had a cavity, or maybe it was two, maybe in both of the top ones. I can't remember, and the fillings are tooth-colored so I can't really tell. We can ask the dentist when we get there, that could be fun, right?"
Jeff was mildly interested in Nick's story but he didn't really say anything other than a quiet "oh."
"Why? Have you ever had any? I mean other than right now."
Nick's question was innocent but it made Jeff feel embarrassed and he turned bright red. "What I have right now isn't a cavity," he defended quickly, purposely avoiding the question he didn't want to answer. "Composites are stupid and they shrink sometimes when they aren't done in layers, and I kinda cracked my tooth because the filling shrunk and left the tooth unstable. I mean... it could be a cavity by now and maybe that's why it hurts so much, but it's not my fault, okay?! I don't have a cavity and if I do it doesn't count," Jeff babbled.
Nick laughed at Jeff's long-winded and dramatic response. "Composite? Is that what you call a filling?" he wondered, off topic.
"Not all of them, only the tooth-colored ones," Jeff answered. "Wait you don't know that? I thought that was common knowledge."
"Not really. You seem to have done your research, huh?"
"I know what they call tooth-colored fillings, that's not exactly impressive. It's just a word," Jeff defended.
"But you also talked about how those type of fillings shrink if they aren't done properly or something. You seem to know what you're talking about at least," Nick insisted.
Jeff shrugged. "I know what I'm talking about somewhat, I guess, but my knowledge in this field is limited. I probably don't know what I'm talking about, I'm just good at pretending I do." The two had been talking for quite a few minutes, but it didn't register with Jeff how long it had actually been until they started pulling into the building. "Shit we're here already?"
"Indeed. You'll be fine. Just follow me in here and I'll check in. This is so boring Jeff, seriously don't worry," Nick said, turning off the car.
Nick was downplaying this by a landslide, at least from Jeff's perspective. His stomach was turning aggressively in protest, he did not want to go in there. "Nick I can't go in there."
"Yes you can. You just walk in, one foot in front of the other. I thought you knew how to walk but if you forgot I can carry you if you'd prefer that." Apparently sarcasm wasn't the way to go because Jeff was glaring dangerously at Nick now. "Okay, sorry. Not the time for jokes. What's wrong Jeff? This really isn't a big deal."
Jeff understood that Nick was trying to help, but constantly invalidating his fears was only making him angry. "It is for me. This stuff freaks me out, I know you don't get that and I can't make you understand but what I'm feeling right now really sucks. All you're doing is making me feel worse, Nick."
Nick walked around and opened Jeff's door because he wouldn't get out. "I'm sorry. I'm not trying to make you feel worse. I don't understand what you're feeling, you're right, but I'm still here for you. But regardless of any of that, you still need to do this honey. Take my hand, you can hold my hand when we walk in."
Jeff looked reluctant but he took Nick's hand and let his boyfriend lead him inside. "Nick I feel like I'm gonna poo myself."
Nick muffled a laugh as they walked in. "Hold in your shit Jeffrey," he said quiet enough so that nobody else heard them.
"If I sneezed right now I'd poo," Jeff supplied.
"Jeff stoooppp talking about shit. I'm gonna check in, go sit down."
Jeff crossed his arms and sat down. He was trying to block out this entire situation, but his surroundings were slowly starting to sink in. He was sweating like a whore in church as everything around him started registering. The gross clinical smell was the first thing that hit him, he hadn't smelled it in a really long time but he recognized it the second it entered his nose. It didn't welcome fun memories either. He cringed at a certain memory he was trying to suppress. There was no way in fuck he'd be able to do this. By the time Nick sat back down next to him he was freaking out.
Nick put a hand on Jeff's knee. "Are you okay babe?" He noticed how badly he was trembling and frowned. "Hey you're okay, tell me what's wrong."
Jeff was simultaneously sweating and shivering hard, he looked like a mess. "You never bothered trying to make me talk about why I'm so scared. You never asked, you were too focused on making me do this to consider that maybe something traumatic has happened to me to make me like this. You don't know the half of it and what I've been going through for years because of shit like this," Jeff said in a harsh whisper. "I physically won't be able to do this. We need to leave."
Nick's face blanched. "But we're already here so you might as well try."
Jeff could have almost gone livid from how angry this was making him. Nick STILL wasn't hearing him. He was about to say something else but someone came from the back office and opened the door.
"Jeffery Sterling."
Jeff felt himself go weak and dizzy and he might have fainted if not for the anger that was keeping him distracted. He decided he was not going to do this no matter what Nick or anyone said, it was out of the books, not possible. No fucking way he was going back there.
He looked to Nick with an angry stare, who was diluted enough to think that they were still doing this. He stood up and was trying to get Jeff to come with him, grabbing his arm even and trying to say something. Jeff snatched his arm away. He didn't say anything as he calmly walked out of his personal hell and went to the car. Nick was trying to grab him and he was saying something, but Jeff kept snatching himself away and smacking Nick's hands when he tried to touch him.
"Jeff, honey please. I wasn't lying. I'll go first and show you that it's not bad. She just wants to talk first, okay? You can handle that, I know you can. My dentist is really nice I promise."
Jeff wordlessly walked out to the car and sat by the passenger's side door on the ground. Nick had the keys and he wasn't unlocking it.
"Jeff I'm not unlocking the door. You have to try," Nick said sternly.
"Then I guess we'll sit here all day," Jeff spat harshly. He had never been so angry in his entire life, he was shaking hard, completely soaking in his own anger. "You lied to me."
"I didn't."
"You did!" Jeff shouted, angry tears streaming down his face. "I trusted you and you lied to me! I was going to try, but now you've shown me I can't trust you. You've lost my trust. I'm not trying anymore. I'll let this stupid fucking tooth rot in my head, I don't care anymore." Jeff had his hands on both sides of his face and he stared down at the asphalt and watched his tears fall to the ground. He couldn't even look at Nick.
Nick could see how much of a mess Jeff was, but he wasn't giving up yet. He knew Jeff was mad, and he definitely seemed like the bad guy here but he was only doing this because he cared. He knew how much pain Jeff was in and he needed this taken care of. "Jeff please. I know your tooth hurts and this is the only way to make it stop. Now please get off of the ground and come inside."
Jeff refused to argue or even speak to Nick at this point and just kept shaking his head hard. Jeff didn't even care how embarrassing this was, how he was 19 and cowering outside of a dentist's office on the ground crying. Nick wasn't his mom and he couldn't get tired of his behavior and drag him inside, he was an adult now and he could say no. He could think for himself and he definitely wasn't going in there.
"Jeff please," Nick tested, trying to lay a hand on Jeff's shoulder.
Jeff swatted Nick's hand away again. "Don't touch me!"
"You're acting crazy," Nick said in exasperation, the frustration getting the better of him. He didn't know how to deal with this.
"Then maybe you should break up with me," Jeff said calmly, still staring at the ground. He couldn't stop himself from saying it and he was so angry that he didn't care.
Nick's face went pale and he gaped. "Jeff why would you say that?" he said in a soft voice.
"Because I'm acting crazy. I know you don't want to deal with me anymore and you're fed up, so just break up with me. Then I won't be your problem anymore." Jeff kept his impassive attitude as he spoke and still didn't look up.
Nick slow-blinked and deadpanned at his boyfriend who didn't even have the decency to look up at him. "Jeffery Anthony Sterling how dare you even think for a second that I'm going to break up with you in the parking lot of a damn dentist's office because you're scared. I'm frustrated and I'm kind of mad because you're outright refusing to cooperate, but I still love you and I would never abandon you. You know I love you and it hurts me that you'd even say something like that," Nick said in the most melodramatic, every cliché in a romantic movie, type of way. He had tears falling down his face and all. "I love you," Nick said softly.
Jeff blinked a few times because his dramatic ass was crying again, now he felt terrible for saying those things. He finally let his eye's meet Nick's. Nick was looking desperately at him, like he needed to hear the I love you; needed to know that Jeff still cared despite the anger and fear.
"I love you too," Jeff said softly. He felt bad for leaving it hanging in the air for so long. "You know that I still love you. I'm angry and scared, but I definitely didn't mean what I said. I'm sorry for being so dramatic."
Nick sat down next to Jeff on the ground and wrapped his arms around him, and they were both crying like the most dramatic saps in love ever.
Both of their heads popped up when they heard the sound of a throat being cleared. A woman in scrubs, who looked mildly uncomfortable, was the source of the sound. "Would you like to reschedule the appointment?" she asked awkwardly.
A/N: Hey guys! Whatcha think? I almost cut out the scene where Jeff was drunk because I felt like it was too similar to a scene in Party Poison (if you've read that story), but there was a small detail in that scene that I feel like is important and I didn't know how else to get it across. I feel like at that point in the story Jeff wouldn't have talked about his insecurities sober, and I get that the whole spills secret while drunk thing is a cliché in itself but this is fanfiction alright what do you expect. I don't know if I like how this turned out but I'm tired of rewriting and cutting out scenes. Do you guys like it so far? Leave me a review if you like it and want more :)
PS. I had Sophomore Slump or Comeback of the Year stuck in my head the entire time I edited this chapter.