The sun was setting on the great Sereitei and it made everything have a honey and warm look. The white and brown that specked the ground were all bathed in the beautiful light. The wind played with my long feiry red hair, moving it's cool fingers through every strand.

Blue eyes scanned all the land around me for any sign of life. More specifically the life of my lover, Captain Toshiro Hitsugaya. We had talked earlier and were planning on going out to our spot and cuddle up and talk, like every week.

But this meeting would be different because Toshiro had seemed stressed about something.

~Flashback to earlier that day~

Knocking slightly on the door, knowing he could hear me, I opened the door and walked into Toshiro's office. He looked up from his paperwork and smiled slightly.

"Hi." I stated, smiling shyly as I closed the door and walked to his desk.

"Hi. Come sit." I walked around the large wooden desk that was stacked high with papers and made myself comfortable on his lap. He burried his nose in my neck and breathed in deeply.

"I love you, Kiyo." he said, a tint of sadness in his usually happy voice. I turned to him and looked into his aqua eyes. Rubbing my thumb on his cheek affectionately, I smiled at him.

"I love you too, Toshiro." I spoke his name slowly and quietly, knowing that's how he liked me to say it. It put a smile on his face. I giggled slightly and wrapped my arms around his neck as he did the same around my waist.

"You should do your paperwork so we can meet at our spot tonight." I stated, planting a kiss on his cheek. His grip tightened and he put his forehead on mine.

"When we get to our spot… I-… I need to takl to you about something." a quizzical look crossed my face and Toshiro wasn't making eye contact with me.

"that's fine." I stated as I brushed off the uneasy feeling that statement gave me. Suddenly, he held my chin firmly, without hurting me, and kissed me on the lips. I could feel the heat radiate from his body but, I was more focused on the feelings I was getting from the kiss.

I felt desparation and passion. He put his soul into it and I did the same, showing him in love. We broke the kiss, breathign deeply. Then I got off his lap and made a seat for myself on the couch as he worked on some more paperwork. I stared at the fireplace, that was unlit, and though about his behavior.

What was wrong with my Toshiro?

~Flashback end~

"Kiyo." I jumped slightly as I turned and two completely different shades of blue eyes clashed together, electric blue with aqua.

"Sorry, I was daydreaming." I stated as I took his outstretched hand and wove our fingers together.

"As usual." we both laughed at this. I did have a habit of daydreaming, but I didn't get that habit till I met him. I looked at Toshiro from the corner of my eye and saw the pain on his face, it was clear now. I stopped dead in my track and he stopped as well. We were in our spot.

Our spot was a small clearing that we had found together so we could get away.

"We can't be together, Kiyo." My body stopped. Blood ran cold. Feet molded into the ground.

"I know we got the Commander-Captain's permission and every other Captain's permission but-"

"I-…" My voice cracked, and all I said was one little word. I swallowed but it didn't help, my voice was lost. Was I dreaming? Was this happeneing?

"I love you Kiyo, I do." he grabbed my shoulders and forced me to look at him. His eyes showed he meant was he was saying but, something inside him was conflicting.

"Is is something I did?" I asked, my voice cracking at the very end. His grip loosened and he held my face.

"No. It's not you, Kiyo, it's me." he said, kissing the top of my nose. It would usually make me laugh but, all I felt like doing was waking up from this horrid dream.

"Then stay." I gripped his captain's jacket tightly and looked into his eyes pleadingly.

"I can't.. because even though I love you more than the air I breath- I mean.." He released my face and took a step back.

"I heard about Abari." I blinked once. Twice. Three times. Then it clicked. He had heard about Renji confessing to me. Renji confessed that he liked me but, I told him someone else has taken my heart and he understood.

"Then you heard that I turned him down." I stated, trying to close the space between us.

"I did but, I also heard about shuuei, kira, and a lot of other guys." what did it matter about them? I had told them all that there was someone else and they understood.

"I don't understand, Toshiro. So what's the matter?" I asked, grabbing his hand. He kissed my hand that was in his and looked at me.

"There all better for you." My eyes widened. My body moved on it's own. There was a loud smacking sound that echoed through the empty clearing. A red mark was forming on Kiyo's hand and Toshiro's right cheek. He looked at the ground, shocked and ashamed.

"How can you think someone is better for me than you!" I asked, shouting with a voice shaky. So much for losing my voice.

"They'd treat you better than I ever can." Didn't he understand me at all? I was nothing before he came into my life. He knew how much he meant to me.

"Understand this. You're the only one for me." I said, trying to capture his eyes so he could see I was telling the truth. He stole a glance at me, his own eyes watering like mine. He suddenly turned to walk away. Tears poured from both our eyes. This wasn't how it was supposed to end. It was never supposed to end.

"Goodbye, Kiyo." just before he flash stepped away, he turned, without looking at me, and moved my bangs, placing a tender and warm kiss on my forehead. I kept the feeling securely in my mind.

"Goodbye, Captain." Holding myself together long enough for him to take one more look at me before he finally flash stepped away. The wind whipped around bitterly, taking away the feeling of his warm touch. I crumbled to the ground and cried, sobbed, screamed, untill someone found me. All the while thinking, he still didn't understand me.