Mass Effect: Emma Shepard's Story
Bad memories: Mindoir
Screams, penetrating cries of fear. That was the first thing I remember about that day. I had finished my day classes and was heading to a friend's house out in the wooded area just outside of the colony when we heard the screaming. The screams cut through me, piercing my ears, raising goose bumps on my skin. Something was terribly wrong.
I looked over at Anna who was also frozen in her tracks; the expression on her face mirrored how I felt: terrified and confused. We ran to the edge of the woods, on a small cliff and could see the colony in the distance. Fields were engulfed in flames; several of the structures had collapse; black smoke was filling the air.
"What is happening?!"
"I don't know Anna. Run home and find your parents. I am going to go and see if I can find mine."
"But Emma, you can't, you can't go down there-"
"I have to Anna. I need to find my family and make sure they are okay. Now go. I will come back, I promise."
I slid down the slanted part of the cliff, hit the bottom and ran. I didn't see anyone but I could still hear the screaming. I slowed down when I got to the edge of our farm town. With my back against the outer most building I quietly walked to the edge and peaked around the corner. It took all of me to hold in the scream building up in my throat.
Batarian slavers. As I looked around the corner I saw a woman who was running get gunned down. Her body landed hard on the ground and blood began to pool under her. I looked at her in horror. Her face was so familiar but I couldn't think; I could barely react. Terror overcame me and I was frozen. What is happening? Her eyes were still open and it was like she was looking at me. I stared into them, so empty, lifeless.
"She is gone Emma. You need to get out of here." A little voice spoke from the back of my mind and it was right.
I finally convinced myself to look away and ducked back around the corner. I could feel tears welling up in my eyes. It was not the time for that. I needed to find my family. I gathered my strength and looked back around the corner. I didn't see anyone so I started to move. Eventually I was able to see my house on the end of an adjacent street. The slavers were in that section in force. I could see the men and some women fighting them in the streets. Grenades were being thrown in every direction, bullets were flying everywhere. The screaming here couldn't be heard over the commotion taking place over here. Using the small street war as a distraction I ran home.
"Hello? Mom? Dad? Ben?" I tried to yell as quietly as possible, trying not to draw any unwanted attention but I doubt anyone could have heard me because the sound that left my mouth was barely more than a whisper.
I had come in through the back door so I was in the kitchen. It was dark in the house and I couldn't see much. I walked into the living room and there was nothing. Where are they? Then I heard the thudding of footsteps coming from upstairs. My heart was racing; I didn't know what to do. I quickly ran back into the kitchen and climbed into a cabinet. I could hear voices but they weren't any of my family's voices. It was the slavers. I could hear them coming down the stairs but what was that noise. Are they dragging something? I had a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. Whatever they were dragging sounded heavy. They reached the bottom of the stairs and stopped.
"Leave the bodies here. Radio the captain. We need backup; another Alliance team is on its way."
More of the Alliance is coming. Maybe there is some hope after all.
"Captain Endryl, we need reinforcements. The humans are resisting and we have heard another Alliance team is in route."
"You will get your reinforcements. Remember we don't want all of them dead. We need some live subjects to test these cranial control implants."
"Yes sir, you have a shuttle full leaving as we speak. Do you need mo-"There was a sickening sound of flesh being sliced, then a loud thud of the batarian falling. Someone else was in here.
"You can't take us that easily you batarian bastards. We won't stop fighting and the Alliance will come and defeat you." That voice belonged to my brother, Ben.
"Ben!" I crawled out from my hiding spot and ran to him.
"Emma? What are you doing here? I thought you were…" His eyes dropped to the floor and I could see moisture collecting in them. He looked back up at me and pulled me in for a tight hug. He did not need words to express his feelings of relief in that moment.
"I had to come back and find you guys. Where are mom and dad?"
He didn't say anything and his silence was my answer but I didn't want to believe it. He then stepped back and turned, looking out into the living room. I followed his gaze and realized who was being dragged down the stairs. I took a few steps towards them, felt my knees give out and I dropped to the floor. I stared at the pale, limp bodies of my mother and father. Bloodied, beaten, dead. I couldn't hold myself together anymore; I lost it. All at once every emotion I felt from the beginning came flooding out of me: fear, distress, anger. I sobbed; my whole body was shaking. I wrapped my arms around my middle to try to hold myself together. This was my home, my colony. We built our lives here only to have everything torn away in an instance. I felt helpless, hopeless. Was there anything I could have done? Should I have come straight home after my classes? Maybe if I was here I could have tried to save them. I cried and cried until there literally weren't any tears left to shed.
Ben laid his hand on my shoulder. I could feel him trembling too, and looked back to see him crying as well. I gathered what strength I had left and stood.
"Let's get out here before any more of them come back. I don't want to be here when they do decide to do one last sweep."
"Ben…" I was still choked up and my words didn't want to come out of my mouth, "we can't leave them here."
He grabbed me by my arms and shook me. "Emma, listen to me. They are gone; there is nothing we can do for them. We need to go no-"
His words were cut off by the sound of glass shattering from the outside gunfire. I ran into the kitchen and Ben ducked behind the wall in the living room. Then a grenade landed two feet from where Ben was standing.
"Emma, RUN!"
I turned without hesitation and took off for the back door. As I my hand left the handle and I was through the threshold, it blew. I was launched off of the steps and flew into the trees behind our house. I rolled over onto my back; I could see shapes falling all around me and I saw a figure walking towards me. I tried to sit up but everything was hazy, my ears were ringing. My head was spinning out of control and darkness was creeping in from the corners of my sights. I fought it but the darkness consumed me.
I could feel myself waking up but for some reason I couldn't open my eyes yet. I could hear the voices of the people around me but I didn't recognize any of them. I don't remember much. The last thing I remember was the grenade and the explosion. Then everything went dark. Where am I? My mind kept replaying the last thing I remembered like I was missing something. There was a grenade, I ran, and then there was an explosion. Grenade, running, explosion. Oh my god-
"BEN!" I sat straight up in my bed. It was bright as hell in here and it took a second for my eyes to adjust. I looked down and saw tubing running from my arms to a machine. I freaked out and started ripping them out, spewing blood and liquid all over my bed and floor. A woman came over to me; she was human.
"Honey, I need you to calm down. You are okay now." She injected something into my arm and all of a sudden I felt fine. The anxiety and distress were gone.
"Where am I?"
"You are in the med bay of the SSV Einstein. Do you remember anything? Can you tell me your name and age?"
"Emma. My name is Emma Shepard and I am 16. Is my brother Ben here?"
"Emma, your bother is here but there have been complications. He is triage right now. I can take you to see him if you would like. His doctor can tell you more once you get there."
I heard her words but I didn't really process them. I guess the shock of everything hadn't quite worn off and after seeing my parents I refused to believe that Ben wasn't okay. Ben had to be okay; I needed him to be okay. She wheeled me over to his room in a wheel chair. I stood at the doorway; my legs were wobbly and weak but I needed to stand. I needed to show Ben that I was fine.
Ben was far from okay. His skin was charred and red; he was missing an arm and part of his leg. There was a mess of tubes coming from everywhere and there were several machines hooked up to him. His eyes were closed and he looked like he was resting as peacefully as he could with everything he had going on but I couldn't imagine the pain he must have been feeling.
His doctor entered the room behind me. "Hi Ms. Shepard, I am Dr. Patrova."
"Is he going to be alright?"
"I am not going to lie to you, your brother is in bad shape. Over three fourths of his body suffered third degree burns. As you can see he lost his right arm and part of his right leg. And that is just what you can see. He had a significant amount of internal bleeding and several blood clots that lodged themselves in places they should not have been. One of his lungs collapsed and the other is badly damaged. We have done a handful of surgeries to try and fix everything but unfortunately there is nothing more we can do. Without the machines, your brother will not survive."
"So these machines are keeping him alive."
"Yes and unfortunately with you being his only living relative, it is your decision to keep him on them or take him off."
"Is he in pain?"
"We have a steady morphine drip going and have him in a drug induced coma to ease the pain so yes he is in a significant amount of pain but we have done what we can to minimize it."
"So I have to decide whether he lives or dies?"
"Precisely. Just take into consideration that if you choose to keep him on the machines, his quality of life will be poor and this is how he will be. I am so sorry this has been put on you but like I said, you are his only living relative and it is what he asked for before he lost consciousness. He said you would make the right decision."
I looked at Ben. I couldn't help but feel angry toward him. Why me? I'll make the right decision- what? Why do I have to decide something like this? I can't just kill my brother but I don't want him to live in agony either. What do I do? What would Ben want? He wouldn't want to live like this- this isn't living. I want my brother more than anything but this person on this bed isn't Ben. Ben died on Mindoir and this is what is left of him. A mangled shell of the man who was my brother, being kept alive with tubes and machines. He wouldn't want this.
"Doctor, if I pull the plug, how long will he have?"
"A few hours maybe. Maybe more, maybe less. It is hard to really say."
"I'm sorry Ben. I love you." I walked over to the wall and yanked on the plug but it didn't move. I looked back and the doctor moved in and turned the machines off. The only machine left on was his heart monitor.
I sat with Ben and held his hand. I didn't talk. There wasn't anything I wanted to say. My whole family was gone. We were happy one day and then the next day I was left an orphan. I could feel tears streaming down my face and I laid my head on his bed. I don't know how long I was like that but the silence between us was broken when the monotonous sound of the heart monitor changed from a beep to a steady tone. The doctor came in, announced the time of death and stepped back out. My whole life was flipped upside down. My parents were dead, and now my older brother.
At least with Ben I had a chance to say goodbye.