So I just watched OVA 7 and I gotta say... What the actual fuck did I just watch? Like holy shit that was... just uncomfortable to watch. Like there was so much wrong shit going on. The only good thing that came from it was a set up for a LaLu oneshot. The only actual cute thing was the Gajevy moment... everything else was just... wrong. There were waaaaaayyy too many weird rapey hentai vibes going on. Basically, this fic is my attempt at making something good come of that uncomfortable monstrosity that I'm pretty sure Mashima wrote with a raging erection. Like that's the only explanation. Anyways, this takes place in the same universe as my "Sparky and Blondie" fic.

Smut. But honestly the OVA is pretty damn close to fucking R rated anyways. I don't own Fairy Tail. And mild trigger warnings because like I said there's some disturbing ass shit in the source material I'm pulling from. O.O

As soon as Laxus threw rock and Erza threw scissors, Fairy Tail team A's hearts dropped. Even Lucy's - because she could see the devious look in his eye. Team B whooped and cheered, and Juvia eyed Gray with a creepy perverted look on her face.

"Oh no." Is all Gray said, his face white.

In the meantime, Lucy shuddered. She had no idea how this was going to go - she and Laxus had just started their "friends with benefits" arrangement a couple days ago. She swallowed thickly, eyes wide, as she caught him eyeing her hungrily. His eye caught sight of the white faced Erza and quickly straightened his back and averted his eyes. Shit. He remembered the whole "keep it a secret" thing... She's going to have to go through whatever weird ass, un-sexy punishment everyone else will be. She bit her lip and tried to hide her blush.

Team B chatted softly amongst themselves for a moment until Laxus pulls out an old-looking map. He grinned wickedly. "This is a map of a place called the 'gates of hell'. I want you guys to bring me a magic stone from there," he said simply, his smirk betraying the level of difficulty. "Except for Elfman, he stays," he tacked on. Elfman pointed at himself uncertainly.

"Uh, me? Why?" he asked hesitantly. Laxus smirked and jabbed a thumb towards his back.

"You get to rub my back," he grinned. Elfman's face dropped and he huffed in indignance.

"Dammit..." he grumbled. Lucy glared at Laxus. That totally would've worked as a way out, and no one would even be suspicious.

"Asshole," she grumbled under her breath, making Laxus smirk wider.

"Careful everyone, take care not to get lost," Erza called over her shoulder, seemingly unbothered by the fact she was wading through a swamp in a bikini. Lucy groaned from near the back, wiping at her forehead. In front of her, Happy paddled desperately, trying to keep himself afloat. She briefly considered picking him up, but it was so fucking hot in this swamp, just the thought of Happy's fur touching her made her feel like having a heat stroke.

"Something's down there!" Happy shrieked, flying up into the air frantically. Lucy just watched the cat. Why wasn't he already flying? She squeaked at the feeling of something brushing past her legs and she looked down only to fly into a panic. There were leeches latched onto her all over.

"KYAAA!" She wailed, flopping around desperately. The boys and Wendy (Who was sitting on Natsu's shoulders) turned to look at the commotion. Happy gripped Natsu's arm. "LEECHES! GET THEM OFF!" she flailed around.

"They're everywhere. It's kind of erotic," Happy whispered calmly. Natsu and Gray just stood watching the scene. Lucy squawked.

"GET THEM OFF!" She kept on screaming, accidentally pulling off extremely suggestive pin up poses that made the guys' faces go red.

"I suppose I should help, since no one else is," Natsu muses. Gray shrugs non-committedly. Slowly, Natsu took his time approaching Lucy and burning off the leeches with his fire. Finally, the last of them fell off and Lucy heaved a sigh of relief.

"Thanks, Natsu. You could've done that a bit faster though," she muttered. There was a sound behind her and everyone slowly turned to look.

A leech the size of a person burst from the water's tepid surface and to Lucy's horror, lunged at her chest and latched on between her breasts. Her eyes blow up and shudders rack her body. The obscene suckling feeling of the creature's slimy mouth had Lucy flailing and screeching like a banshee again, whipping the long leech back and forth.

"This is also very erotic," Happy calmly states.

"STOP FUCKING SAYING EROTIC YOU STUPID CAT!" Lucy wailed, squeezing her breasts together in an attempt to, id don't know, suffocate it or something?

"Should we help again?" Natsu muses. Gray crosses his arms.

"She seems to be enjoying it," he considered.

"THESE ARE NOT THE SOUNDS OF ENJOYMENT YOU IDIOT!" Lucy sobs. Natsu sighs and steps forward again blasting her with a completely unnecessary amount of flames. While it does burn off the leech, it also burns most of Lucy's clothes. She fell back into the water which luckily put out the flames. She spluttered her way to the surface and glared at Natsu.

"Thanks," she said drily. Suddenly a monkey burst from the surrounding trees and wrapped itself around a surprised Gray.

"The FUck?" Gray shouted in surprise, eyeing the monkey distrustfully. It coiled itself around him with hearts in its eyes. Gray's face drained of color. He pushed at the monkey but it wouldn't let go. Natsu started laughing at him.

There was a spine-tingling screech and a larger monkey burst from the trees, fangs snapping at Gray. The ice mage was able to throw up an ice make: hammer just in time to smack the attacking simian clear into the distance.

After they got back from their venture in the swamp, which ended shortly after Erza massacred a bunch of alligators, Laxus took the rock from them and dropped it into… a Jacuzzi.

"It was…. For a Jacuzzi," Gray deadpans. "A fucking monkey forcibly made out with me, for you guys to enjoy a Jacuzzi."

Lucy's face was red as a tomato and she couldn't decide if it was because of her anger at Team B, or the sight of Laxus in his swimsuit. His stormy eyes locked on hers and he shot her a toothy smirk, flexing subtly in a way that made Lucy forget what she was thinking about. Team B started choosing their victims and Lucy shook herself out of her daze just in time to hear Gajeel claim her. Her jaw dropped.

"NO WAY! SERIOUSLY!? THAT'S THE WORST OPTION!" she bawled. Gajeel gihi'd manically from his spot in the hot tub. He pulled a box closer from off to the side and tossed it to her, grinning deviously.

"Tell ya what. There's two outfits in there. Get shrimp to join and I'll go easier on ya," he chuckled. Lucy puffed out her breath dramatically, shooting an accusatory glance at Laxus that seemed to say "are you seriously letting this happen right now?". The blond behemoth watched her with a bored expression, but a heat in his eyes that once again threw her mind out the window. She didn't even pay attention to what other nonsense situations the others were sentenced, and scampered off to find Levy and beg her to help.

By pulling every favor she had, she was able to convince Levy to don the second "outfit" and help with her punishment. The outfit? A goddamn sexy bunny costume. Lucy looked in the mirror as she stood next to a similarly embarrassed Levy and looked at her ridiculous visage. She groaned and buried her face in her hands in mortification for a moment. Her punishment, was to go on stage on either side of Gajeel and dance while he played a set of his songs. So not only did she have to embarrass herself in front of everyone, but she had to listen to that god awful cacophony of sounds Gajeel calls "music". Out of the corner of her eye she spotted Laxus seemingly headed for the bathroom.

"Be right back, Lev." She muttered, but she only made it one step before Levy's small hand grabbed her arm in a grip far stronger than she should have been capable of. She could sense the darkness rolling off her friend and slowly peeked over her shoulder to see Levy looking at her with an expression that mixed murderous with embarrassment, and uncomfortable.

"Don't. You. Dare. Leave me." She threatened lowly. Lucy trembled a little, actually a little afraid of her friend, before shaking her head vigorously.

"I swear I won't! I just need a minute!" she blabbered. Levy slowly released her grip and went back to sullenly looking at her own reflection. Lucy scampered off into the back halls to find Laxus.

Lucy POV

I didn't get very far before I smacked right into a hot, damp expanse of muscled chest. Large hands quickly caught me by my shoulders and I looked up into Laxus' heated eyes. I swallowed thickly at his appearance. Droplets of water trailed down his form temptingly, steam rising from his heated skin. His damp hair was spiked even more erratically than usual and his swimsuit left very little to the imagination. Not that she had to imagine, of course – she was becoming quite familiar with his… appendage.

I want his cock – NO! BAD LUCY!

I snapped my wide eyes back up to his smug ones and glared at him. His eyes trailed down my figure, taking in my costume with hungry eyes.

"You look… delicious," he purrs, his head lowering towards mine. One of his hands slid down my arm, trailing shivers behind it. I ignored the aching in my core as best I could and planted a hand smack dab in the middle of his face and pushed him backwards. His feet remained planted, but I managed to make him bend backwards. He looked at me between my fingers in amusement. He then licked my hand and I squawked, pulling it back hastily as if burned. I wiped my hand off on my leg before placing my hands on my hips.

"Yea, well, you could have…um… t-tasted me all damn day if you didn't leave me to the fucking wolves, you jerk!" I stuttered out, blushing brightly at my insinuation. His eyes darkened but that damn smirk stayed put.

"But that would be too obvious, now wouldn't it?" he murmured, and I hated that he was, kind of, sort of, right. But still!
I harrumphed and turned around to stomp back, his chuckle behind me ruffling me further. I reached a morose Levy and grabbed her wrist, pulling her with me towards our destination. "Let's get this over with," I groaned.

We took our places on either side of Gajeel (dressed in that ridiculous white suit and hat, although Levy blushed a little at the sight of him). His awful singing began and I started the dance – shaking my hips back and forth sensually, and letting my breasts bounce up and down with each move. My face burned in embarrassment at seeing the crowd of townspeople watching us with hearts in their eyes. Over everything I was able to hear Mira torturing Erza on the other side of the crowd in what sounded like a weirdly sexual dominatrix thing. At least I'm not Mira's victim.

After a while, for some reason, Levy bolted away crying. I guess she tapped out. Gajeel called after her gruffly and growled as she kept running through the throngs of townsfolk. He pulled his guitar off and growled. He turned to me and pointed towards Mira – who was now sitting on a throne in her Satan Soul with Erza kneeling to the side in a skimpy maid outfit on a leash. What. The. FUCK Mira?!

"You're Mira's now! I gotta go catch shorty!" he barked to my utter, and complete, dismay. All color drained from my face and I started to tremble. Oh Gods no.

I watched helplessly as the raven-haired man barreled through the crowd after the crying blue-haired bunny. I could feel Mira's evil intentions radiating off her. And she was like forty feet away.

The next few hours involved Mira alternating between me and Erza with her riding crop, smacking us on the rear until we blurted out whatever weird thing she wanted us to. After a little while, I started to realize something. I certainly wasn't enjoying this situation… but if, say, Laxus were the one doing this…

The thought heated me up quite a bit more than I care to admit. We were both tied up and I puffed out my cheeks in annoyance. Dammit Mira, you are not supposed to be the person teaching me about the various kinks I have! Talk about humiliating.

"Slave, tell me why you're being punished?" Mira demands, her voice taking on a dark edge. Really?

"Um… C-Cause Erza lost at rock-paper-scissors?" I hesitantly squeak. Mira just smacks my ass with the riding crop, the sting making me yelp. "Because Gajeel pawned me off on you?" I try again, accidentally letting a little sarcasm slip in. Mira is not amused, and my ass cheek screams at me to not be sassy right now because goddammit that thing hurts like a bitch.

"Try again, Lucy," Mira says sweetly. I take a deep breath.

"B-Because I'm a bad girl, mistress! I'm sorry I'm so bad!" I wail, putting just a little moan in there, absently hoping Mira will get uncomfortable by the extra sexualization and move back to Erza. Although that is a pretty unlikely chance. She's literally a demon. I hear a low groan to the side and I whip my head over to see Laxus on the sideline, eyes wide and jaw dropped a little, looking simultaneously caught off-guard, ridiculously turned on, and uncomfortable, all at once. I watch his eyes narrow, the blistering heat in his gaze making my stomach flip deep inside of me in a way that made me tremble. I try to pull my best sexy eyes, and I guess it worked at least a little because he shuddered in strain. That's it, Laxus… C'mon big boy… take the bait… Come save me from Mirajane the demon dominatrix…

"That's right, Lucy. Now say it again, dear." Mira chided, the crop stinging my ass again making me squeak. Except… the sting felt somehow… kind of good this time. Well shit. I remembered reading something about how when you're really aroused your pain tolerance goes up and pain can also become pleasurable. I guess it might be right.

"I-I'm a bad girl!" I stutter, locking eyes with him and watching his jaw clench in frustration. I subtly lick my lips, still looking him in the eye, and he takes the bait. He schools his expression into his usual neutral, bored one and strides over confidently.

"Yo, Mira. Elfman and Natsu are taking too damn long and I need someone to clean my office for me," he drawled, avoiding my gaze. "Let me take Lucy from ya."

Mira shrugged. "Sure," Is all she said. I could hear Erza mutter something like "God fucking dammit," under her breath as Mira turned her full attention back on the requip mage. Laxus hoists me up over his shoulder like a sack of potatos, because apparently he's a fucking caveman. He waves in farewell, striding back towards the mostly empty guild hall. I can feel his tension as he forces himself to keep his pace natural seeming.

"I have to admit, I was not expecting that one," Laxus grumbles. I cross my arms and huff.

"You could have been doing this the whole time, too. But no, you just had to be a big jerk," I grumbled back, cheeks permanently stained red at this point. I shifted uncomfortably – as ashamed as I was, I couldn't deny that the combination of his gaze and the smacks from the riding crop turned me on a lot more than was probably appropriate for public display. A low groan rumbles from his chest as he inhales deeply and I almost die of embarrassment when I realize he's actually smelling my arousal. And my ass is right next to his face goddammit just kill me already.

"You have no idea how fucking delicious you smell right now, Blondie. Fuck…" he moans, running his free hand through his hair. I bury my face in his back and try to slow my breathing, hands wringing themselves nervously. As soon as we reach the back door to the guild, Laxus practically sprints us upstairs to his personal office. He sets me down and immediately goes to grab a small remote type thing from his desk. He clicks a button and a ring of runes around the premises light up. He then slams the door shut, which makes me jump, and wrenches the lock shut. Before I can even think to react, his hands are on my body and his lips are capturing mine roughly. My body instantly reacts to him, pressing itself closer to him even as he walks us back to his desk. He blindly reaches behind me and shoves the stack of papers to the floor.

I moan into his mouth as his hands explore my body, tugging at the skin-tight outfit. When he can't figure out how to get it off, he picks me up and sets me on his desk, where he drops to use his teeth to tear the front of the costume open. His hot lips pull at my nipple, pulling a strangled squeak from me that I try to stop by slapping a hand over my mouth. He chuckles while his hands rip the front even more until he can slip his hand down to cup core teasingly. I bite my lip hard to try and withhold the moan.

"Those runes make this room soundproof, Blondie. And my demand for you is that you let all those sweet sounds out," he purrs, nipping along my breasts. He pulls back to look at my body strangely and he raises an eyebrow at me, some unknown emotion in his eyes. I blink at him, unable to do much as his fingers circle my clit and tease my opening. "Any reason you've got hickies all over you?" he growls.

"Huh?" I respond dumbly, trying to figure out what he's talking about. I look down… Oh. Right.

"I was assaulted by leeches thanks to your stupid fucking scavenger hunt," I growl, eyes narrowing. He looks at my body in contemplation for a moment, his fingers continuing their insanity-inducing teasing. Then he smirks.

"So what you're telling me is, I can mark you all I want and you have a perfect excuse?" he grins. I glare at him.

"I just told you I got attacked by leeches, and that's what you got out of it?" I say drily. My irritation with him goes right out the window when he dives to latch onto my neck, teeth scraping the sensitive skin. I buck my hips, trying to get his fingers to go faster. "Oh God, Laxus… please…" I whine. He chuckles against my neck and suddenly he's ripped the entire top half of the outfit clear off. He then pulls me down off the desk and turns me around. He gently but forcefully bends me over the smooth wood, my heart thundering in my chest as he pulls the remnants of the outfit down enough to expose my glistening womanhood. His hand goes back to my core and he spears two fingers deep inside of me, drawing a yelped moan from my panting lips.

"You're my slave, remember Lucy?" he chuckles. Then his free hand's palm comes down on my exposed ass and my hips jerk into it.

"FUCK!" I yelp. His hand then soothingly massages the tender area, making me hiss as he trails over the fresh stinging marks from the riding crop. He clucks his tongue.

"So you are into spanking, hm?" he teases, voice gravely enough to betray his own level of desire. I say nothing, but my blood rushes to my cheeks. His hand then very gently pats my rear in a very light spank and I moan, dropping my head to the desk.

"Yea, when you do it," I grit out. He hums, and just lightly rubs his hand over the slight welts.

"I'll keep that in mind for next time," he purrs. "But it looks like Mira went a little too rough… we can try it again once you've healed," he murmurs to himself. I nod slightly, unsure of what else to do. I feel him hesitate, and his fingers stop the ministrations against my inner walls. I look back in confusion to see his brow furrowed and mouth in a line.

"Um… Shit… Okay, I know I said you're my slave, but I just… I need to make sure you know that you do have a choice right now, yeah?" he grunts out awkwardly, blushing a little. I stare at him, a little dumbstruck. "I mean, it certainly feels like you're into this, I just… uh… with the situation… I don't want you to think you don't have a choice in this particular activity just cause of the bet thing…" he rambles. I blink owlishly. His unsure facial expression with a slight blush was strangely… cute. Especially considering he currently has his fingers inside my pussy at this very moment.

"Laxus," I say softly, drawing his guarded eyes back to mine. I cock an eyebrow saucily. "I'm aware. Now I think you were in the middle of something?" I deadpan. He smirks, the heat back in his eyes and his fingers curl, making my eyes roll back. HE brings me to the edge while his free hand pulls down his pants enough to release his hard member. Withdrawing his fingers, he grips my hips and lines himself up, the hot tip sliding up and down my slit. I whimper in want, bucking backwards.

"I'm going to show you a new position now, Blondie. And I think you're guna love it," he growls in my ear. His hips surge forward and he sheathes himself in my wet heat, pulling a strangled moan from my agape mouth. This position… fuck he's so deep right now. He begins to move and as soon as his head rubs up against a special, amazing spot, my walls clamp down on him in a rush of ecstasy. His hips pump in and out throughout the toe curling high, each pass working that awesome spot.

"Oh fuck me Laxus… R-Right there…" I keen, back arching to try and pull him even deeper until he's hitting the very end. His strong hands hold my hips firmly as his own buck with enough force to force my breath out of my lungs with each thrust. Groans of his own mingle with my moans and screams, and I'm so thankful for this soundproofing thing because holy shit that feels so good.

He hunches over my back to bite and suck on my shoulder. The force knocks the bunny ears off my head and they dangle awkwardly from my ear until he grabs them and tosses them somewhere over his shoulder. His hand comes back to thread through my hair, gripping it in his fist to add tiny pinpricks of pain that blend into more pleasure. His hips speed up even more until I'm crying out again, my release dripping down my thighs. He grunts and pulls out, leaving me panting against the desktop. I struggle to lift myself back up on shaky arms, turning around to look at him in confusion. He didn't cum yet, so why did he stop?

Laxus walks over to his desk chair and sits down lazily, cock still out and at full attention. He leans back, hands behind his head and grins cheekily.

"Suck me," he demands. I stumble over to him and fall to my knees in front of him, the sight of his hard cock covered in my release making my breath hitch. I lean forward excitedly and wrap my lips around the tip, my hands bracing themselves on the tops of his thighs. He groans lowly and I probe around the tip with my tongue, exploring slowly. He reaches to the side with one hand while the other cups my cheek and bends my head to look up at him. He smirks and sets the bunny ears back on my head. "Keep those pretty eyes on me, little bunny," he growls. "It's not wise to look away from a hungry wolf," he finished, flashing one of his fangs and letting his eyes smolder. I swallowed thickly around his member before continuing my task with renewed vigor. I take him as deep as I can, gagging a little, and allow my tongue to caress every inch I could reach. I hollow out my cheeks and suck, making his head fall back with a moan. Excited by his response, I keep doing that, trying different techniques with my tongue and learning what makes his eyes roll back.

One of his hands grabs the back of my head, gently holding me closer, his fingers flexing in restraint. The other stayed behind his head, giving him a sexy, smug look. He panted heavily, the throbbing in his member signaling his close end.

"Swallow all of it," he demanded, eyes blazing. My own widened in surprise. I mean… do I want to? What's that going to be like? What if it tastes bad? His hips start to jerk roughly as he loses all of his control and I focus on not gagging. And suddenly he lets out a long groan and hot, thick liquid hit the back of my throat. I almost choked in surprise but recovered enough to swallow it as much as I could, pleasantly surprised at how… acceptable it tasted. I mean, it wasn't good, per say, but I didn't mind the taste. I swallowed what I could, but a little bit dripped out of my lips. I pulled back, letting him slide out of my mouth and coughed, trying to regain my composure. I work on swallowing the remnants, but catch sight of his gaze boring holes in my skull. I look up at him with wide eyes, his mouth agape. I slowly lick my lips, catching most of what slipped out. His eyes were so dark I could hardly see any stormy blue left. I used my finger to wipe of the last of his cum from my chin, and look up at him curiously. He just stared at me with rapt attention. I slowly flicked my tongue out at it, lapping up the last of the salty liquid. He groaned low in his chest.

"Holy fuck, Blondie. Words cannot describe how fucking sexy you are," he groaned in temptation. He shoots a look at the nearby clock and smirks. "Well, little bunny. We've got another four hours until you're free," he grins devilishly. I gulp and blush deeply.

"W-Well… I guess you should… get started on t-tasting me then, huh?" I squeak out nervously. His grin turned wolfish and he lifted me up by under my armpits, setting me on his lap so I straddled him, my bare core pressing against his half-erect member.

"Mmmm… I suppose I should, hm?" he breathes against my lips, capturing them desperately. His hands were everywhere at once, quickly reigniting the fire in my veins.

At midnight, while lying on his office floor in each other's nude arms (aside from the bunny ears still inexplicably on my head), I suddenly frowned.

"Laxus."

"Hm?" he responds lazily.

"Mira thinks I was cleaning your office," I murmur unhappily. Laxus nods sleepily.

"Yup," is all he said, obviously not getting what I'm trying to say.

"Your office is a fucking mess, Laxus. It's pretty obvious there was no cleaning done." I explain slowly. Laxus stilled, then looked around slowly, his face falling as he noticed that yes, his office was a mess.

"Are you saying…" he starts.

"Yes," I sighed unhappily. "We need to clean your office before tomorrow," I finish. He groans and flops his head back, slapping a hand over his face.

"Do we have to?" he whines. I roll back over and wobble to my feet.

"I think we do. Unless you want to explain to Mira what else we did instead of cleaning?" I suggest sarcastically. He grunts. "C'mon. If you help me, I'll stay naked and in these stupid bunny ears. And maybe if we finish fast enough, we can fool around some more," I purr suggestively. He hops to his feet immediately and makes his way over to the pile of papers on his floor and started gathering them up.

"Well? Let's start this shit!" he says impatiently.

Fin

Seriously, what the actual fuck Mashima. Even transcribing some of those events made me feel awkward. And I write smut often.