"Good evening, ladies…." The husky, rumbling voice was amplified around the room, rousing a cheer from the predominantly female crowd, "…though I see we have a few gentlemen in the crowd tonight." A blue eyed wink is cast to a handsome young man seated in the centre of a group of woman, wearing a jaunty hat that flashed the phrase 'Birthday Boy' on it.
"I'm Garrus and welcome to the only all male revue on the Silversun Strip," his subharmonics purred around the room and more than a few of the crowd shifted uneasily in their seats.
"Let me introduce you to the rest of the talented, muscular and…." he rumbled a laugh, "…flexible men that will be entertaining you tonight."
A gut grinding sound thumped from the speakers, and Garrus' voice twined with the singers voice:
"We will begin with Thane, Superspy for the underground," A spotlight came up on the darkened stage, revealing a tall, lean figure in a hat tilted down over his eyes, a long black coat on, his hands thrust into the pockets. He didn't move for a moment, then slipped the hat off his head, flicked it around in his fingers with impressive dexterity. He flipped it around his back and it landed back on his head. He swept his coat aside, revealing a bare, muscular chest that got the crowd whistling, and he paused, kneeling, his hand on his head, while the spotlight came up on the next stripper.
"James Vega, rough, tough soldier of the Alliance. He will hunt you to ground, ladies," there was laughter in Garrus' subharmonics as James Vega marched out in camo-gear, without an undershirt and carrying a mock-rifle. He had a smirk of a smile on his face, came to attention in the middle of the stage, and began an intricate series of manouvres with the gun in time to the music that got the crowd whistling and cheering. Some of those moves with that gun wouldn't be legal in twenty systems, some of them were banned on Omega.
"He can hunt me down anytime," Ashley murmured to Shepard taking a sip of her champagne.
"I can't believe you talked me into this," Shepard hissed in reply, she had her arms folded over her chest, "It's just…blatant…I don't know…" she waved her hand at Vega who had finished with a cocky salute and a wink to the crowd.
"It's smokin' hot is what it is —WOOHOO!" Tali cheered as she sipped her champagne through a straw. Vega pointed at her and ran a hand down his impressively muscular chest.
Cortez just buried his face in his hands, "I can't believe you brought me here."
"Oh, lighten up," Ashley lifted her fingers to her lips and gave a piercing whistle, "This is the other human in the review. Alenko something. I heard he can seriously move."
"From brute strength to sexy flexibility, ladies, this is Kaidan!"
The man named Kaidan had the build of a dancer, and oh, could he dance. In loose black pants and bare chest he worked it. Sweat shimmered on his skin as he writhed and spun, undulated his impressive abs and finished on his knees, dark eyes smouldering at the audience.
Shepard nearly choked on her drink, "Bloody hell." She wiped her chin, "Okay, that was sexy as hell."
"Just wait, Shep," came the drawling voice of Jack, seated just in front of her, "You should see the turian behind the voice."
"Turian?" Shepard's nose wrinkled, "Sexy?"
"Oh. Just you wait," Jack sounded smug.
"And the final member of our little group - Garrus, intrepid officer of C-Sec," the turian stepped out from the shadows, dressed in the tunic of C-Sec, open down the front, barechested and muscular.
"Oh my gods," Shepard choked out.
"Told you," Jack leaned forward as Shepard shrunk down in her chair, blushing fiercely.
The four men began a routine that was…yeah…had the women in the crowd on their feet, cheering and shouting. Kaidan was the only trained dancer, but the others, oh they could really move. Muscles flexed, eyes smouldered, skin went slick with sweat. The song ended abruptly as the four men posed in a final moment, chests heaving with effort, the women in the room hooting, hollering and waving glasses of champagne over head.
Three of the men went off stage, and the music changed.