Dreams
It came in phases, gradually getting worse in an almost amusingly lycanthropic way. That is to say, with the lunar cycle. Mother Nature could be such a kidder.
They had been close long enough to sense it coming on at times. Though Lightning believed herself to be more aware of it than her lover. She could see the subtle yet steady changes in Fang's manner, the way she carried herself, down to the tone of her voice depending on the moon's phases. As it waxed fatter and fatter each night, Lightning could feel the pelt coming in too.
"Pelt's high," Fang would say, almost in warning, her eyes always low and away.
Not that she needed to hear it. They had shared a bed for over a year, she knew. Fang was an awfully clingy sleeper, and just the contact of skin to skin, anywhere, gave Lightning ample gauge of where Fang's symptoms were. At its lowest there was no sign of it, though it was there, flat against the L'Cie's skin. Going further along the microscopic hairs would raise, show themselves, and thicken to a fine bristle. Fang's temperament would also change, from cool and playful to tense and fidgety, even unnecessarily cross. And with it came a degree of vulnerability that would have Fang waking in sweats from nightmares. That is, more often than usual.
Our memories can either cripple us, or galvanize us. And while Fang experienced the latter much more often than the prior, no one could stay strong like that forever. Everyone bends eventually, which was unsettling to see in someone as strong as Fang.
Sometimes they surface so hard, so real, it's terrifying.
The dreams usually started in the reactor.
Struggling, jerking, cutting away the wires and the glass. Can't speak, only screaming and growling. Scalding hot. Burnt to bones. On my knees, can't get the claws to retract.
From there, it could go anywhere. By now the fear sets in, that subconscious gut wrenching that can only come in one's defenseless slumber.
The animal's comin'. Black and hungry, gainin' fast. Gotta out run it. Gotta go, can't let it devour me. Not a monster, not an animal. Gotta run. It's right behind me, my own shadow, gnashin' teeth and reachin' for me. It's pullin' me, claws hookin' my veins.
And it just keeps going, getting worse.
But Lightning. She holds me tight, secure, safe.
"I'm losin' it darlin'. Just hold on to me...else I might disappear. Don't lose me...don't let go."
Lightning explodes into pillar of blood. I'm covered in it, can taste it, its in my mouth. Mortified, struck with horror at what I've done. Lightning's body's on the ground, ripped apart, eyes open and lifeless. Screaming. Stabs of pain, adamantium spines shooting through the skin. Daggerflesh. Twisted, fractured, hurting. Can't breathe fast enough, gotta scream. Howlin'. Howlin' like a...a...
A gasp of air, body seizing upright in one swift, jerking motion, a cool rush as air moves against a veil of sweat on naked flesh. She's shaking, hands fisted in the sheets, claws peeking out of the terminals from the tension wracking her body. Fang reminds herself over and over, mind buzzing with the chant, that it was just a dream. She pulls her hands, still fists, up to cover her face, a tremor rattling visibly through her as she forces a long and shuddering breath out of her body. She gathers herself a little, lifting her head, looking about through the dark stillness of the bedroom. Moonlight was coming in through the sliding glass doors. Pearl shadows on the floor so bright you'd think it was daylight.
Fang huffed again, eyes lowering away from the lunar glow, and to the rises in the bed linens beside her. Looked like Light was still sleeping, undisturbed. Good.
She pulled her palm down her face, wiping away the sweat as she slipped out of the bed. Just as quietly she crept through the cabin, through the dark and still air. It was too god damn stifling in here. She had to get out, she had to find room enough to breathe. And she wouldn't find it until she stepped through the front door, out into the chilling autumn air. Out into the wild. She shivered once, looked out into the dense forests surrounding the retreat, and then just ran, disappearing into its sylvan veil.
Light was awake, actually. Though she was so still, showed no signs of concern or surprise, that she managed to fool the L'Cie. She waited, having been awake for some time now, anxious of what would happen. What Fang would do. The tossing and turning, sleepy muttering, woke her perhaps an hour ago. She knew it was another of those nightmares, and as much as she wanted to stop it, shake her lover out of its grip, she restrained herself. She'd always heard it wasn't good to wake people in the middle of dreams like that.
She had been listening, just able to hear the wild L'Cie moving through the cabin, her heart sinking when she heard the door open and close. Fang was gone again, though not for good. At least she hoped. Lightning understood, to a sufficient degree, what Fang went through when the heat had settled in. Understood enough to accept that sometimes Fang just needed to get out, just...run away.
But she always came back.
Still there was always a quiet anxiety as well. Would she be back? Did the animal finally win?
Lightning eased out of bed, keeping the blanket around her shoulders to ward off the chill in the room. Bare feet slipped across carpet to the sliding glass doors and she looked out as she eased to a stop in front of them. Just managed to catch a glimpse of her lover vanishing in the shadows of the woods. Worry creased her features gently, the moonlight casting shadows on her face as she tucked the blanket closer to her body.
Light had wanted so badly for these next few days to go smoothly, especially after having gone through the trouble to plan this time away for just the two of them. She had purchased the secluded cabin a few years back, thinking it the perfect place to disappear to should a job attract too much attention. Still, she had known it was coming, knew there was no avoiding it. Knew it from the moment she noticed how uncomfortable Fang had been on the long drive up here, squirming in her clothes and growling low at the frustration of it. When the pelt was high, clothes were the last thing Fang wanted to have to think about. She said clothing felt like sandpaper, bordering on painful at times, and there was nothing to be done about it until the pelt laid down again. Sex helped, but not always enough to count.
Lightning shrugged. She had tried and failed. No point in pouting over it. She slipped out of the bedroom, her feet and the blanket dragging a little as she drifted into the kitchen. Maybe making some coffee would help. She wouldn't be able to sleep until Fang returned anyway. As she pattered about the kitchen, gathering grounds and sugar and milk, her mind wandered. Her features creased again.
Fang always fought it, tried to hold it back until this sort of thing happened. Trying, giving everything she had, doing her damnedest to be the person Lightning needed her to be. In the L'Cie's mind, that must have meant to be as human as possible, to force the animal to hide. But Lightning knew that never worked. It came out eventually, and often left Fang feeling ashamed. And it didn't matter how many times Lightning assured her that she could take it, that she understood. She still tried to shove it all down and behave, perhaps afraid to break her fragile hume.
Her mate.
Then these things happen. Like the nightmares, or the more unsettling waking dreams. Flashbacks that came about like a bullet to the brain. Fang often had to sit through them, let them settle before being able to function normally. One night it left her wedged in the corner of her dorm room, curled, face hidden against her knees and hands curling claw-like into her scalp. For hours. But once it ended, it was like it never happened.
Some days it's like caring for a special needs child, almost a burden that you willingly bear. Other days Light felt as a mere mortal in the presence of some supernatural being, at the mercy of a force of nature. Humbled.
Lightning almost felt as though her lover didn't trust her to handle that wilder, rougher side of her, though she had already seen the best and the worst of it. Then again, that could be part of the reason. Fang knew Light had seen it all and didn't want to expose her to that again. However that concern seemed to fade when they made love, especially when the pelt was high.
Perhaps the only time Fang and the animal in her blood could find consensus.
Lightning took a deep breath, starting the coffee pot. Then she ran her fingertips firmly over her scalp.
It wasn't complicated, she kept telling herself. Just...difficult. Fang was anything but an open and shut case, but did she have to hide like that? From her? They were supposed to rely on each other, share the burdens. That's what mates do, right?
Another deep breath, her worry settling a little deeper in her chest with a slight clench.
Maybe, she wondered with a subtle whimsy, Fang just needed to be shown that her mate was strong enough. Convinced her fragile hume wasn't so fragile.
But how?
(-)
It was safer here, quiet among the trees and the other animals that scurried about on four legs instead of two. Here the animal could roam and not harm anyone, could have its turn until it was satisfied.
Through the dark she moved like a ghost, almost unheard, almost unseen, her keen eyes able to work sufficiently even with such little light coming through the dense forest. The pelt bristled at the cold air rushing over her skin, heat was coming off of her in a fine mist, just visible. Sweat was still rolling as her body was pushed, harder and harder, legs pumping as fast as they were able. Heart slamming within her ribs, lungs heaving with air. She could avoid the roots, low branches, and the fallen logs of the wood as if she'd known they were there, knew this place like she'd been born here.
The animal knew, as any animal would, instinct guiding every step. Just as it had known the forests of Oerba when she ran through them one night, riding out the adrenaline of another series of dreams that had left her shuddering in terror.
"Go, darlin', run. Just let it have ya for a spell." Her father had said. "Let it stretch a bit."
It had helped then, the rush of it soothing and at the same time exciting. It was starting to help now that she had run for a while. The animal was just under the skin in moments like these, and it was...there was no describing it. It was a state of grace where it seemed as though everything was perfect. Human and animal merged, harmonious and powerful, adapted. But Fang found that just as horrifying as her nightmares. She didn't want to be the animal, she just wanted it to stay quiet, to leave her be so her mate would be safe.
Fang was not afraid of the animal, more so of what the animal had come so close to making her do. All because some clever bastard found a way to fool her nose.
She forced the memory down, tossing her head back and forth in protest as she pushed herself to run that much faster, that much deeper into the wood.
(-)
Lightning would've sworn she sensed Fang emerging from the forest, though she didn't see it from where she sat on the sofa, blanket still about her shoulders and an empty coffee mug having been sitting in her hands for hours. With no apparent hurry she stood, setting the mug on the kitchen counter as she passed it on her way to the front door. She would wait behind it, near to it, listening as steps ascended the small collection of wooden stairs and how they seemed to stop just at the landing. She would wait maybe a minute more, wait to see if she would actually come inside. She would open the door just a little when nothing more happened.
There she was in the gray dimness just before dawn, sitting on the steps with her knees to her chest, back curled slightly. Fang was quiet, still, which had become the norm during these phases. The claws were partially extended, only an inch or two visible. Lightning could see the fine mist coming off of her skin, body heat in the chilled autumn morning. Light would advance with care.
She put the blanket around Fang, knowing she didn't need it, but also knew that Fang understood that it was more for herself than the L'Cie. It lessened the worry. Yes, the microscopic pelt kept her warm enough, but Lightning...she had to do something, not wanting to feel entirely helpless. So she simply let it be.
The first time she tried, though, Fang had snapped at her.
"I've drawn a bath for you." was all she said, and did so quietly.
No verbal response, in fact, no response at all, but Lightning knew she heard. Fang was always
quiet, focused seemingly elsewhere when these things happened. She was riding it out, taming herself, letting the wildness settle back down. Once she had, she would look at her again. Everything would be okay.
Fang would eventually creep back inside, Lightning not too close behind so as not to agitate her. Light waited outside of the bathroom, a brush of steam and light cast against her briefly as the door was opened and closed behind the L'Cie. She waited, listening, quietly anxious for the sound of water that would cue her that Fang had gotten into the tub. She would wait but a short time more after that before stepping inside, having given her ample time to settle.
The claws were still extended as the L'Cie had curled up on herself again, knees to her chest, chin atop her knees, eyes forward and slow blinking. Her arms crossed over her shins. Lightning approached slowly, body language neutral, and she came to settle on the floor beside the tub, the blanket that had been left in a pile enough of a cushion to sit on. Just as cautiously as she had settled, Lightning let one hand dip into the hot water, to the knuckles. Times like these you had to take getting close to Fang in stages, none too quickly lest she react.
Lightning counted to ten in her head, holding her breath, and quietly exhaling as she reached the double digit. The only sound was the drip-drop of water from her fingers as she lifted her hand and touched Fang's side. She felt the soft bristle of the unseen pelt and slight twitch of the muscles under the skin. A soft growl rippled the water, Lightning tensing slightly. Her hand unconsciously started a gentle stroking gesture, though it could easily have been to calm herself more than Fang. The L'Cie accepted the tender offering without complaint. Lightning could almost feel some of the tension in the room ebb, most of it her own. Feeling like that part of Fang had finally accepted her presence, there was more ease to her movement. She cupped her hand, filled the space with water, and raised her hand to allow it to flow down Fang's back. If you focused, you could see the fibers of the microscopic pelt.
Another low growl, this one sounding much more relaxed, almost pleased. Encouraging. Lightning continued, mindful of the subtle changes in Fang's body language, the slow but steady relaxation, the claws beginning to slide back. Eventually her body would loosen entirely, stretching until she rested against the tub, her head propped on the rim. Her eyes were closed as she let out a long sigh. Her hands hung over the rim as well. It hurt like a bitch when hot water got down in the terminals before the flesh healed.
Lightning had her hands in her lap, the water on the one growing cold. Her mind seemed to wander, her eyes unfocused, off and about. At this point it was just a matter of waiting, waiting for Fang to come back to herself. The animal was tired now. Sated.
Well, not so much sated.
Lightning moved, feeling the soft bend of a knuckle against her cheek. Her eyes focused, lowering, and meeting deep green irises. Fang's eyes were only half open, but they focused, no longer distant as they had been. The L'Cie's hand gently pushed stray rosy tresses away from her face.
"You didn't worry about me, did ya?"
"You know I do. Sometimes." she replied. "It just...it seemed worse."
"Meh," Fang sniffed. "Just been too long since the last time, I think. Nothin' to fuss over." It had been a while, almost two months since the last time she'd been able to run like that. "I'll be okay. Just gimme some time."
"I know." Light nodded, the motion curt, discreet. "Fang?"
"Yeah, babe," Fang sighed, head now tipped back again, eyes closed.
"What," she had to muster up the guts to say it, "what do you dream about?"
"The usual." the answer was almost too quick, like she'd rehearsed it before in preparation for this very conversation. "Blood. Guts. Screamin'. You know."
"Is that all? Really?"
Fang's features tightened, not liking the hume calling her bluff. "I don't wanna talk about it."
Light hadn't expected that answer. She had expected a lie, a diversionary assurance that it was nothing. But not that.
"You can talk to me."
"I know. And I don't wanna."
Light felt her chest tighten, hurt. "Don't you trust me?"
Fang shook her, slowly, back and forth against the rim of the tub. "It ain't that, darlin'. I just wanna let it go...not think about it more than I have to."
Lightning sat and processed the response, trying her damnedest to come up with a gentle yet potent protest. But she couldn't find one, and the failure left her silent.
Fang saw the displeasure on her mate's face. Could sense it too. "Don't read too much into it, darlin'. 'Sides, it's just a dream."
"A dream that makes you run from me...waking up terrified. You think I don't notice?"
"I never said that. Just sayin' ya don't have to worry so much." Fang touched her face again, fingertips tracing the gentle bend of her cheek, the slope of her jaw. Trouble lined her features when the hume wouldn't look at her. "C'mon, don't be like that. Ya feelin' left out?"
"Yes, actually." Light responded, matter of fact like. No point in lying.
"Well, no need for me to bother ya with every little thing, is there?"
Forest met sea as Light raised her eyes, meeting her lover's gaze. "Maybe I want you to. We take care of each other, remember?"
"You're such a sweet thing," she smiled, toothy. "Give us a kiss, yeah?"
Not that she could say no, deny or resist though a small part of her wanted to. She knew Fang was trying to change the subject, and was rather successful I might add. Lightning wanted to talk it out, to say what was really on her mind, but the words faded like spiderwebs at dawn after the first kiss. Everything started to blur then, and the next thing she would be aware of was the bed beneath her, and Fang surrounding her with those powerful and deadly hands slipping beneath her clothes.
"I'll be gentle," came that purring, hungry whisper just as her teeth pinched a nipple through Lightning's clothes.
Light was grateful for the assurance, actually. During the heat it was hard to tell what side of Fang she would experience in bed. The softer, loving side, the playful and somewhat daring side, or "bite the pillow, I'm going in dry"; each had their pros and cons, but it was the surprise that Lightning appreciated the least. She had found lovemaking to be much more fun when she knew what she was getting herself into, though Fang seemed to have a different opinion. Surprise was half the fun.
Afterward Fang would fall back to sleep, Lightning curled along her back, backs of her fingers stroking her side in languid passes. Her sleep was deep, dreamless. But Lightning remained awake for a while yet, wondering, her thoughts circling.
What could she do to make Fang see? Words weren't going to cut it, something she should've realized from the start. She needed to think of something else, something more...potent. A display of strength that both Fang and that side of her she was hiding would understand.
But what?
The question would plague her for the next couple of days, lingering on the edge of every train of thought as she and Fang enjoyed their time away. It consisted mostly of lazing about the cabin, talking, and silently reveling in the idea that they had nothing more pressing to do. Nice change of pace. The L'Cie insisted on doing the cooking, which Light was incredibly surprised to find out she was a natural. She didn't have much instinct for it personally, but Fang seemed to have it all figured out. To the point where the hume was genuinely concerned of getting fat. Maybe she should've guessed at her talent when she had so eagerly volunteered to handle groceries for their trip. Who knew beer was an ingredient in so many dishes? And it was actually rather amusing to see Fang prance about the kitchen with a cigar in her mouth, vaguely following the radio in nothing but jeans.
The nights would wind down after a few more beers and idle chitchat, and then the two would shuffle off to bed. The lights went out and the cabin was quiet for a spell.
Lightning would lie awake, still wracking her brain in the dark for the answer to that million gil question. On her back, staring at the ceiling with her hands folded over her stomach and trying to focus through Fang's resounding snoring. Dear gods, whoever was responsible for her lung capacity should be shot.
But the racket didn't last for very long, she knew it wouldn't. The snoring would usually fade out just before the tossing and turning started. Almost like clockwork. The mattress shifted and shook under the rolling of the body beside her, the silence cut by sleepy huffs and grunts. All of which steadily increased in frequency as the minutes ticked by. Lightning mentally steeled herself, knowing what was coming next. She could already feel the heat coming off of Fang's skin, and then the muttering started. Lightning never could make out what she was going on about, only that it gave her the chills to listen to. She happened to look over, seeing in the moonlit darkness how Fang's fingers hooked into her arm, tearing at them, like tearing out the wires in her dreams.
Then she was awake again, though in a slightly gentler fashion than usual. It wasn't as sudden. Still, Fang slipped out of the bed as quiet as a spirit and out of the room. Light felt a slight flinch go through her at the sound of the front door closing.
Now what? I feel like I need to do...something.
Wait a minute...
Lightning practically jumped out of bed and rushed out of the room.
Fang ran, like always, deep into the embrace of the woods as hard as she could. On and on, hundreds of yards ducking about the undergrowth at breakneck speed until she just couldn't go any further. Spent, body heaving to breathe and body throbbing with fatigue she perched on a fallen pine at the pit of a ravine. She hunched, on the balls of her feet with her palms against the bark. A feral posture.
The woods were still, quiet, the air still and damp, chilled. Her own heartbeat was the only sound for miles once her breathing eased. No deer, no birds -not even owls at this hour-, nothing. It felt like being a world apart, light years away from anything and everything. A deep exhale left her as a mist, rising upward.
Then everything stopped. Fang went rigid, muscles bunching as she froze, even stopped breathing. Something was in the air, something that wasn't there before. Green eyes searching, severe, she sniffed manically, ears tuning. Suspicion made her body tense that much harder, her back straightening. Something was out there, moving, coming up fast.
Fang sprang into motion, leaping from the fallen pine and dashing along the length of the ravine, headed for its end. It wasn't out of panic, there was too much finesse in her movements for there to be panic. She was in complete control, as was the animal, they simply had to know what was out there. What was making the grave mistake of following her trail?
Along the ravine, out, and then doubling back around its outer slope the L'Cie ran, quickly, quietly. But whatever was back there was keeping pace, almost too well. Still, there was no panic. This area was full of more ravines, some furrows connected in an labyrinthine fashion. It would be easy to outmaneuver, at least fool what was giving such faithful chase into losing her trail.
There was still no trace of it, no scent on the air, only a vague sensation of its presence. And her own heart was pounding much too hard to pick up any other sound.
Fang ducked into the next furrow she came to, skidding on bare heels in mud as she turned suddenly. Halfway down the length of it she could have sworn she saw something leap the breadth of the ravine just above her. A good ten foot span, not many things in this forest could jump that so easily. But no scent of deer, and the biggest thing in these woods was on two legs, not four. It wasn't something, it was someone. Someone had followed her out here. And now there was a mild panic, now the claws came out.
Up and down the mountain side, passing game trails and creek beds, and then down into the valley Fang pursued and was pursued by this thing she had yet to catch scent of. It was always just behind her, just out of sight. She'd had enough, this had to end.
Coming off the slope she entered a clearing, a sort of bald spot in the woods bathed in moonlight. Just as she turned, claws poised and body set like a trap, something collided with her and wrapped about her waist, tearing her to the ground. Fang struggled, pushing against hands gripping her wrists, keeping her claws at bay. Heated bodies twisted, rolled through tall grass and vying for control. A flurry of motion that kept the L'Cie from focusing, from seeing her assailant. A growl of frustration ripped out of her heaving chest, teeth snapping desperately. She could feel the hot breath of the other against her face, could hear the grunts of resistance. With that, at last she had a scent, and it gave her pause. She froze, on her back, looking up with more shock than she thought herself able to muster.
"Lightning?!" she heaved, chest rising and falling in rapid succession.
The mercenary was perched above her, straddling her, her weight focused forward to keep the L'Cie's hands above her head. She panted heavily. "Gotcha."
The L'Cie gawked at her. "Are ya off your rocker?! Don't you realize what I-," and the complaint was cut off by an insistent, silencing kiss. Fang twisted against her weight, demanding she hear the rest. "I'm bein' serious, I could've-," no such luck.
Lightning wouldn't have it, she wouldn't be chastised or coddled this time. She kept her grip tight on Fang's wrists, allowing them no purchase even after the claws slid back and the L'Cie gave an honest effort in resisting. She growled against the hume's mouth, protesting wordlessly, but Lightning took it in.
"God damn it, woman, I'm tryin-," and the snarl was cut short, a sharp intake of breath and the sudden stilling of her entire form a symptom of it. The L'Cie felt blunt canines at her throat, cautionary pressure against the tender flesh there. And there was a growl not her own, a sound she was convinced her mate couldn't make. Still, her reaction to Lightning's behavior was natural, if you think about it in a different way.
She understood now. Finally. Lightning had it figured out. She needed to stop trying to convince Fang of her strength like a human would. She needed to show her, like a proper mate. All this running, giving chase, made Lightning see what she was doing wrong, where she was coming up short. Wolves don't make arguments with words, they convince with fangs. And the realization, combined with the pursuit of her lover through the woods, had made her hot.
"Now listen." the heat radiated into her voice, and a small grin twisted the edge of her mouth as she felt Fang shudder beneath her. "No more hiding. No more excuses."
"Light, this isn't funny," Fang snapped.
"I'm not joking. I caught you, I win. I'm making the rules now."
Fang tried an honest protest again, but not a word formed as Lightning tightened her jaws anew against the L'Cie's neck. She could even feel the gentle pulse just beneath the skin. Instead, like before, she froze and her body tensed.
"This ain't a game, Light!" Fang tried again when her lover's hold released.
"Good, because I'm not playing." The velvet heat at the tip of her tongue found the tender lobe of Fang's ear and the L'Cie shivered again. Light felt her lover still resisting honestly, even as she took the bit of flesh between her teeth and pressed, even as Fang groaned at her insistent attentions.
It was too much, the L'Cie fretted. Too much. She couldn't handle it. The pelt was high, accepting of what she was trying to fight, encouraging what she was attempting to deny. Lightning's tongue eased over the fibers and set them alight with hot sensation. Her mate was taking her control away, and it was terrifying. What little resolve she had to keep it all in check was disintegrating. But Light was asking for it, nigh on demanding it. And as much as Fang didn't want to admit it, she kind of liked it. Okay, "kind of" didn't quite fit. A part of her was reveling in it, heating her body, her core, to her lover's touch, to her demand. The animal was reaching for it. And it would be so easy to just lose it with her.
But I don't wanna hurt her. And she released a ragged cry, just as the hume's arms wrapped about her, one hand sinking between her thighs and a kiss silencing her. It left Fang's hands free, but all she could manage to do with them is twine them in heated rosy tresses, nails to the scalp.
Light felt herself shiver. Her testing touch revealed the scalding heat of her mate's center. Already so hot for her. She teased the swollen bud and rimmed the entrance with a single fingertip, then tested further, a gentle penetration, and the found the slick passage hungry and gripping.
"You want this," came her heated whisper. "Tell me."
"Light," Fang panted against her scalp, holding on tight. "Please,"
"Please what?"
"Just...gimme control back, lemme handle this," she almost choked on the words, struggling to find them. "It'll still be good, I promise,"
"Oh no. My rules, remember?" the hume rose, back straightening as she peeled the tank top from her body. She didn't have a pelt to keep her warm, so clothing was still a necessity in this chill. Now all she had were those tight, black boy shorts that Fang had expressed a hatred for a time or two. They cover too much, she said. They got in the way.
Fang's heaving breath stilled at the sight of her, pale skin alight with the moon's glow. Good gods, like seeing her for the first time, and she hardly resembled the hume she took as her mate. Much too powerful. She wet her lips with her tongue as she reached up, wanting so badly to touch, but Lightning stopped her, gripping her wrists once again.
"Not yet."
A snarl, a flicker of fangs. "That ain't fair," she growled.
"I never said my rules would be." a slight smirk, one that made the L'Cie's grimace tighten. But then it smoothed as she was able to watch her hume touch herself, palms flattened against a toned abdomen, hands cupping to support supple breasts but a moment before the thumbs and forefingers pinched the nipples. Fang swallowed hard, a lupine shimmer in her eyes as she watched the tokens harden. Her mouth was watering, and she could feel the animal bristling just under her skin. Her resolve was nearly gone, and there was nothing to be done about it.
Lightning's hands eased to the back of her own neck, just a moment as her eyes held her mate's gaze, and then retraced their previous path downward. Over her breasts, her stomach, and then eased onto Fang's quivering body. Over the hard muscles of her belly, teasingly between her breasts, and then oh so gently settled over her cheeks. All the while rubbing languidly over the pelt, setting it ablaze with pleasure. Fang growled hard, her jaw tight, molars creaking with the pressure.
"Look at me."
Fang had shut her eyes, pleasure riding hard through her body, but now looked up. Desperation and hints of fear filled her.
"You won't hurt me."
"But, darlin', I-,"
"You won't," she said again, hushed, lowering closer to her. "I trust you."
Fang tried to shake her head, finding the hume's grip surprisingly secure. Where had all of her strength gone? That power that could push back a Ugallu almost weighing a ton? "No. That's the heat talkin'."
"I've never been afraid of you, you know that." Light was moving now, wedging herself between Fang's legs, hips settling against hers. "Even before the heat, I was never afraid. Even when you said I should,"
Fang swallowed, her heart rate spiking as Lightning's scent filled her, her heated breath against her skin.
"I trust you," she repeated, her tone somewhat softer, "because I love you."
There were no words, no response her mind could process enough to vocalize. Fang simply looked at her, stupid.
"I know...you took me as your mate out of obligation, and I'm okay with that. But...that doesn't mean you can shelter me. I don't want to see you suffer...don't want to have to watch from a distance while you ride it out. Let me help. I can take it."
Still nothing. What could Fang possibly say?
"And if you won't let me. I'll make you."
Then her ass showed, ego curling her expression. "Like t'see ya try, dar-," the snicker was cut out by a scream, her fingers hooking into the hume's shoulders. Lightning lowered her head with savage quickness and put her teeth to the L'Cie's throat a third time. A claiming strike, drawing blood with certainty.
The pain was quick to ease, Fang's chest heaving against Lightning's weight with both surprise and a hot streak of lust. Sweet gods, that was unexpected. That was hot. But following the pain was wariness, as the L'Cie had felt something change. Something, Lightning's scent maybe...no, but it was coming from her. She watched, curious, as the hume rose over her again, back rigid.
Lightning felt it, something was going on now that she had that copper rich taste in her mouth. There was a smudge of crimson on the edge of her lips that her tongue unconsciously chased after. Her heart started pounding, panting breaths slipping in and out. She could almost feel her blood flaring with heat. Not just her blood, but the mutation in her cells. It was working again, changing, building on the foundation the serum had laid.
Slowly Lightning inhaled through her nose, chest expanding, eyes closed. Then she exhaled with a slight groan, eyes opening wide, a new glint to them. She looked down at her lover who could now clearly see a new breed of hunger in her gaze. Her hands fanned over her lover's stomach, fingers curling against the taught and tanned flesh. Then she paused, perhaps lost in the sudden rush of her vitals. All Fang could do was lay there and watch, wait.
Everything synched. All of her senses heightened and focused, pupils dilating, nostrils gently flaring. Another deep intake of air, scents coming clearer than before, another pass of her tongue over her bloodied lips. Everything was different now. She looked down at Fang, realization in her eyes.
What came next would be a blur to her come morning, but for the time being, it was as sharp and clear as the edge of broken glass.
Lightning hurried to wriggle out of the black boy shorts, tossing them away to forget about completely. Then she moved, no, stalked upwards along her lover's body, skin slick with sweat to allow the ease of the advance, and situated herself just so, her knees on either side of Fang's head in the grass. Eyes narrowed, Light smoothed the stray curls of dusky tresses from her mate's face.
"I'm waiting," her tone was low, rumbling. Almost a growl.
It was in that moment Fang, and the animal as well, realized they were anything but in charge. They were at the mercy of this woman who had so easily taken the dominance away and now wielded it with ferocious precision. That, coupled with the overwhelming scent of her arousal, the intoxication of her senses, there was no denial. Fang had to accept her place, if only for tonight.
Fang felt the tips of Lightning's fingers harden against her scalp as she raised her head, hands cupping her backside to find the leverage she needed. Her caresses began with a series of almost gentle kisses, wetting her appetite really, and then she eased her tongue along the nectar coated slit. Above her Lightning shivered, groaning, fingers tightening in her wolfish mane. Fang hooked her own fingers to catch into Lightning's supple flesh, pulling downward with enough strength to leave welts. The pressure pulled the hume closer, giving Fang better access to her heated center. Sweet gods, she tasted so good, and she growled at the sweetness. Lightning whimpered as the vibration rattled her frame. Her hips began to move on their own, churning, gently bucking against her lover's tongue.
The hume was burning from the ground up, fire across her skin from head to toe. And she didn't care. It felt too good for her to care. She just wanted more, she wanted to feel that much more powerful. She had this L'Cie, this force of nature wrapped around her little finger, pleasuring her on a whim. You don't just let that go.
"More," she demanded, voice and body shaking. "Gods, give it to me,"
Another growl shook her core, Fang's tricky tongue probing her entrance, and another ragged cry escaped her mouth. One hand untangled from Fang's plentiful tresses to palm her breast, adding to her own pleasure as she was pushed closer and closer to the edge. Gods, so close, so close and wound so tight already.
Fang's tongue slipped inside her, working deep, wicked in the way it twisted and curled.
"Oh gods," Light shuddered, back arching. "Etro, please," then it happened. Her breath caught up in her chest as her body tightened, went still, and then shivered through an exaltation of her lover's name. And through it all Fang growled with pleasure, holding her tight with her hands as those hot, wet muscles clasped around her tongue.
In the haze of the aftermath, Lightning didn't comprehend how she ended up on her back, a heated body easing over her as she still quivered with tiny tremors, beads of sweat dappling her face. She tried to focus, her eyelids moving languidly.
"I didn't know ya felt like that, love." came Fang's gentle purr, liking her lips clean. "I just didn't want ya to worry. But I understand now, darlin'. I understand." In truth, the L'Cie understood, and the animal simply didn't enjoy having its ego abused in such a manner. It would go along with it, pacify its mate if it meant avoiding further such punishment. "And I didn't take ya just because of what's become of ya. I got a habit of takin' what I want, and I wanted you. I wouldn't have made the offer if I didn't."
Light looked back at her, seeming half there. "Do you love me?"
Fang's brow knitted in the dimness of the moonlight, shadows deepening around her eyes. "I dunno, not too sure what that kinda love feels like. But I could. Iffin' that means anythin'."
Light smiled, a little expression due to fatigue. All the running was catching up to her. "Kiss me."
And Fang was more than happy to oblige. In her mind she marveled at the hume. Hard to fathom someone accepting that part of her that she couldn't. Lightning was embracing the animal, tried to pacify, at times even encourage it. Fang always tried to cover it up. Guess Mother Nature had the right idea after all.
"Now touch me, darlin'. Make me scream for ya."
And by gods, she would scream.
They would remain in the forest until dawn, enjoying their carnal romp in the tall grass, among the towering trees. In the grayness of early morning they lay together, Lightning tucked to her lover for warmth, Fang curled along her back and holding her mate close. She kissed her shoulder, not too quickly as she wanted to relish in the flavor of her flesh.
"Your scent's different." She said quietly. Now she was certain of it, no longer having to sift through all the arousal to find it. "Somethin's changed."
"I know." Light almost sighed.
"We'll have Moira take a look into it when we get back."
"Could we not talk about work just yet?" it was a gentle complaint complete with a groan. "I just want to sleep."
"All right, love, you rest. I'll watch ya."
"Fang?"
"Yeah, babe?"
"What do you dream about?"
Fang took a breath, half shrugging. "I wasn't lyin' before. Just didn't tell ya the whole truth I guess."
Lightning had guessed that much, from having watched her night after night. Her restlessness was telling enough, but she knew there had to be more.
"It's just...they all end the same. I lose you. One way or another, though mostly because of me."
"You're afraid of hurting me." something else she already knew.
"More to it than that, darlin'." Fang continued. "I'm not gonna be able to keep a hold on myself forever. It's gonna happen. I've accepted that. One day it's just gonna be too much...and I won't come back from it."
Light felt her heart clench. Perhaps she had considered the same possibility. She was certain everyone on Muir had as well.
"Part of me prays you won't be around to see it. Another part of me hopes ya are. 'Cause I know you'd put me down gently. That is, iffin' I didn't take you out first."
It was quiet for a spell, the two of them trying to process it all. Eventually Lightning would find Fang's hand that rested on her stomach, their fingers lacing together.
"I trust you." was all she said, certain it would suffice.
Fang smiled against her shoulder. "Good t'know, love. Someone should." And though she said she would stay awake, watch over her weary mate, that lasted for all of ten minutes. She tried. But she was tired as well, while having slept, never really rested. And she eased into another dream.
Though this one would be much different.
A flash of light, like a veil of blackness drawn back, too bright to see. Like seein' the sun for the first time, it burns. But the pain is small, brief. I'm not alone, someone's there, nearby. It's her, Lightning, her face comin' into focus slowly. Those eyes, and they're full of all the love and understanding I never saw before. Never thought was there. I reach up, touch her face. The claws are still out and I can't pull them back. But she's just smilin' at me, soothin' all my fear away. She keeps tellin' me it's okay, and I believe her. She loves me in spite of it. She loves me. Loves me.
But she looks away from me now, down and away, to the side at something on the ground. I look too, too curious not to. Just a heap of somethin' black, all twisted up and covered in hair. It's that thing, that creature I can't get away from. At least what's left of it. Looks like a throw rug now, an empty husk of what it was. Had..was I wearin' it? I've been scared of myself this whole time...and Light pulled it offa me...
We are one, the animal an' me. But she don't care. She ain't afraid. She just holds me to her, real close, and never lets me go. I'll be all right. Yeah...both of us.
And both would sleep soundly, almost at home in the embrace of the forest.
Author's Note: Hope you enjoyed this installment of fanservice for its own sake, as it may be a long ways before there's another. I tried to make it as sexy as possible, not too sure I got there, though. I like a little story with my erotica. Don't know if I'll ever write FLight again after this, but stranger things have happened so don't count me out entirely. Next is Lords of Chaos, but not until I take some duly deserved time off to recoup and catch up on school. Thanks again for taking the ride with me, and be sure to catch my "Ask the Author Video" for this fic on youtube! Check my DA for details!