What she had told Amanda, although it felt like a lifetime ago, still held true. Kenya chose to end her 'thing' with Nolan because she was unwilling to compromise her job and her clients for him. Yes, she cared about him and yes, she'd enjoyed their little get-togethers. She had even refused to take his money and that, ultimately, is where her problem started. Refusing his money had given Nolan the idea that what they had was something special, had planted the seed for ideas of galloping in on his white horse to rescue her, the poor damsel, from this horrific life where she was forced to sell her body.
Kenya was not ashamed of her career. It was her decision to provide a much-needed service to the people of Defiance and, despite what Amanda may think, it gave her a somewhat respected status with plenty of leverage. There was no way she was going to lose that for some Lawkeeper who had ridiculous notions of love and stability. Kenya knew that the world of white picket fences was far behind them and it was no longer possible to have a simple relationship without death and danger breathing down your neck, so she shot him down.
Without the hope that she could have a normal relationship, Kenya didn't mind their 'thing' ending so abruptly - the Needwant was her life and she was content with that. Of course, that was until Stahma Tarr walked in asking for assistance in educating Alak.
Before their encounter in The Needwant, Kenya found she had very little opinion on Stahma. She was merely 'Mrs Tarr', one of the more pleasant wives of her patrons. Kenya respected her and tolerated Datak, taking his money without complaint and keeping a powerful man very happy with her. After their conversation, however, Kenya found herself in a very different situation.
It was never her intention to seduce Stahma. They were simply talking and drinking when Kenya noticed the way the light fell across Stahma's features when she laughed or looked down at the table. Kenya saw how she came alive as she spoke of being a performer with her loyal following. When they went upstairs, when Stahma came apart clinging to her and saying her name like a prayer, Kenya knew that she had found something unexpected; something she didn't want to give up.
When Datak requested an appointment Kenya would have said yes. She knew that she should say it because her priority had always been running her business and that Datak was a loyal customer. But she couldn't do it. When she thought about how Stahma had spoken of her husband, the fear in her voice as she insisted that Kenya never tell anyone about them, Kenya felt sick. With nausea rising up within her Kenya chose to provide Datak with one of the other girls, someone who would keep Datak happy and prevent Kenya from having to look in that man's face and hide her disgust.
Stahma's visit made her forget all about the horrible situation. Kenya lost herself in Stahma. The beautiful Casti's moans and sighs were all she heard, the sweet tang of Stahma's skin all she tasted, lilac eyes rolled back in pleasure all she saw. Once it was over and Stahma was getting dressed, Kenya realised the enormity of what she had done. Stahma explained it to her, the issues that may have now arisen with Datak due to her carelessness.
Kenya told Amanda that her job came first before any relationship, so when Stahma pressed the money into her hand Kenya tried to convince herself that it was only business. Watching Stahma walk away was one of the hardest things she had ever done.