Another Brony fic! Hopefully this shall get my muses back in working order, but no promises (unfortunately). The songs used are both by Skillet in their 2009 album "Awake." "Monster" and "Never Surrender" are theirs respectively, I'm just using them for the enjoyment and further development of this fic.
Enjoy!
It was after a battle that Tony became privy to his lovers innermost thoughts. Now, the whole thing could have been avoided had Bruce gotten better headphones, ones that didn't leak the sound out, even when they were in use. But his refusal at spending more money than was needed meant that the usually calm man had to make do with the shitty ones that came with the iPod. Even if the volume was rather low, if one put their ear close to the other person's and the headphones were still in, they could hear the song; every word, every chord, every beat.
Bruce had gotten injured in the latest battle; rather, the Hulk had, and the damage, within proportion, marked Bruce's skin. Long jagged claw marks swiped diagonally across his abdominal muscles, and Tony, being the over protective man that he was, demanded that Bruce allowed himself to be looked over in the lab.
"Tony, I don't know if that's such a good idea; I need that time to cool down..." Bruce tried to explain. Each of the Avengers had a post-battle ritual; Nat cleaned her guns, Hawkeye meditated in his corner of the tower, Captain read, even Thor calmed himself by seemingly talking to no one (when questioned, he explained that he was actually talking to Heimdall, who saw and heard everything. He would pass on Thor's tales to his father and friends until Thor could return to Asgard.)
Bruce, by comparison, chose to listen to music. Tony had asked him what kind on many occasions, but he merely responded with a cryptic, "It fits the mood." With that said, Stark was curious, but still accepting and willing to give Bruce the space.
"Well, you can do your routine while I fix you up. Sound good?" Tony asked, keeping care to leave an option for Bruce to say no. But as Bruce tried to exasperatedly sigh, his breath hitched with pain, leaving him hissing and doubled over, and Tony looking onwards with worried smugness, an odd combination that only he could pull off.
Bruce looked up, meeting Tony's expressive gaze. "Okay, meet you there? I just gotta grab my iPod..." he hesitantly asked. Triumphant that Bruce now would be getting help, Tony nodded before spinning around to go walk to the lab.
"Now sit up here Bruce, and take off your shirt. Once that's done, you can just tune me out, got it?" Tony instructed once Bruce met him in the lab.
Shaking slightly, making Tony frown, Bruce nodded. Sliding onto the cool metal lab bench, Bruce shed his shirt before unplugging from the rest of the world. Watching as his lover slowly slipped into a near meditative state, Tony softly smiled. For peace to finally grace his lovers face meant that he was truly happy. He walked over to the sink in the back of the lab, wetting a cloth and grabbing some rubbing alcohol to prevent infection. Tony then returned to his physicist, and began inspecting the marks. For the most part they were shallow, and had clotted over already when Bruce was the Hulk, but there was one deeper gash towards Bruce's chest, wrapping around to his back.
Wincing in sympathetic pain, Tony began to clean out the wound, watching for any signs of discomfort. Aside from some small twitches here and there, Bruce seemed relatively calm. So it surprised Tony when he felt tears dropping onto his hand.
"Wha...?" Tony was at a loss; if the pain was that much, wouldn't he have said something, maybe a wince? His pain tolerance wasn't thatstrong, so what was the problem? Tony reached around Bruce's back, tenderly cleaning the abrasion, watching for any collation between the tears and the pain. Instead, he was granted with an earful of hot, heavy metal rock. The type of music that rebellious teenagers listened too, not something that Tony would peg Bruce to like. Until he caught some of the words.
"I feel it deep within,
It's just beneath the skin,
I must confess that I feel like a monster!
I hate what I've become,
The nightmare's just begun,
I must confess that I feel like a monster!
I, I feel like a monster!
I, I feel like a monster!"
Tony was shocked. So this is what Bruce meant when he said that it "fit the mood?" He felt like a monster? Even after all Tony had done to ensure that Bruce need never feel that way again?
Uncharacteristic anger washed over the billionaire as the realization set in. Bruce hated himself; no, he hated the Other Guy. He felt like a monster.
Just as Tony was going to rip the earbuds out of Bruce's ear and start yelling at him, the song changed. Low guitar strums echoed across the headphones, before the song started.
"Do you know what it's like when,
You're scared to see yourself?
Do you know what it's like when,
You wish you were someone else?
Who didn't need your help to get by?
Do you know what it's like to wanna surrender?
I don't wanna feel like this tomorrow,
I don't wanna live like this today.
Make me feel better,
I wanna feel better,
Stay with me here now,
And never surrender."
The change in the tone of the two songs was radical. Tony froze, bandaging the injuries robotically. It wasn't until the end of that song that he realized Bruce was looking at him. Turning to meet his gaze, Tony could feel overwhelming sadness in his eyes.
"Do...do you really feel that way?" Tony stammered. Bruce pulled the earbuds out of his ears, methodically wrapping them around the iPod, buying himself time.
"If I'm being completely honest with you, Tony, then yes. Yes I do. The Hulk may be a help in some cases, but you don't have to live with him in the back of your head, day after day. Constantly keeping a lock on him, each day is a test that I can't recover from if I fail. Don't you understand that?" Bruce implored, begging Tony to understand. Everyone had abandoned him because of that, and that's before he tried to kill them. Blind rage was a scary thing when it came to Bruce Banner.
Tony stood, putting some distance between himself and Bruce. He understood, but didn't Bruce? He would love him unconditionally, both him and the Hulk; after all it was due to the Other Guy that he was even here after his mini trip to space.
"Bruce, I don't need an explanation for anything except for one thing; do you really view the Hulk as a monster?" Tony asked, keeping his voice carefully free of any accusation.
To his surprise, Bruce glared halfheartedly at him. "Don't bother trying to stay neutral Tony. I know where you're going with that, trying to convince me that the Hulk is good. But I just can't see past all the murders, the fear, the blood that he's caused."
"So what you're telling me is that all my efforts to make you feel love and appreciated are worthless because you will never believe it? Is that what you're saying?""No, that's not it at all Tony; stop trying to make it all about you!"
"Surprisingly, it's actually all about you, Bruce." Tony's voice held no malice, just an earnest reassurance. "Everything I do, everything I say, everything I feel is now related to you in someway."
Tony stepped closer to Bruce, letting his body heat warm the other. "I'm never gonna stop trying to convince you otherwise, Bruce," he whispered before rising to kiss the man sitting before him. He kept enough wits about him to avoid draping his arms across Bruce's back, but all other thought fled except for worshiping Bruce. Gently nipping at Bruce's lower lip, Tony sighed into the kiss, allowing him to gain entrance to his mouth.
Bruce's hands trailed up Tony's body, before tangling themselves in Tony's hair, lightly pulling. When Tony moaned in appreciation, Bruce teasingly pulled away. Laughing slightly under his breath, he countered,"And I'm never going to stop denying it-ahhh, Tony!"
Stark kissed and nipped along Bruce's jawline until he settled over Bruce's pulse point and sucked, drawing a whine of at the skin below his lips, Tony gave one last lick before pulling away, exposing the bruising skin. Smirking at his handy work, Tony kissed his way back up to Bruce's lips as he carefully massaged Bruce's chest, keeping care to avoid the mostly closed gashes.
Bruce leaned into the warm hands spread over his chest, reveling in the sensation of being wanted. It wasn't something that he had been exposed to in his lifetime, only with Betty before, and that went extremely wrong. The painful memories curled around his brain, causing him to jerk away from Tony's ministrations.
Reading Bruce's pained expression, Tony mentally rolled his eyes (outwardly could have been misread) before leaning upwards and whispering, "You're not a monster, Bruce. I love you."
To which Bruce replied, "You don't know that for certain, Tony. I love you, too."
Between kisses and confessions, the argument continued throughout the night. Tony, the man who wouldn't surrender, and Bruce, the self proclaimed monster. In the end, it was a tie. But did it even matter?
Hope you enjoyed! Comment please?
3 Huntress
