*I changed the summary of the story (because I suck at initial summaries) to match better with the plot now.*

One

~.

Things were so much simpler before, as friends.

When they were just teammates playing baseball, they talked, laughed, and hung out with each other. They could look each other in the eye without turning away from embarrassment or mumbling an excuse to leave. They could touch in the most innocent places - a shoulder, an arm, hands while in mediation - without feeling awkward and strange. They could blurt out anything on their minds and then joke around about it, instead of dwelling on "Did he mean something else?" or "What was he actually implying?"

Because friends didn't think thoughts like that. Friends didn't look at their friends and imagine what it would feel like to hug the person and squeeze him until nothing is left but the feeling of their touch. Friends didn't let their subconscious think things like 'I wonder where he is now' or 'I wonder if he's thinking about me as well.' No, friends didn't get jealous when their friends begin to hang out with someone else more than them, and especially when they seem to be flirting with every single person within a 10 inch radius as well.

And most of all - friends did not cry when their friend decided to get a girlfriend.

Of course, if someone had actually pointed out that Hanai was reacting to the complete opposite of this, he would have denied everything. Of course he wasn't crying. He wasn't even close to shedding a tear, much less a sob. Though his frown eventually grew into a wry and somewhat aching smile, he wasn't particularly jealous either. He just felt...a bit annoyed when he saw Tajima with an arm around a beautiful blonde-haired girl in the school courtyard. And it wasn't like he didn't want to admit that the two looked really good together. With Tajima's dark hair, ruby-colored eyes, he contrasted sharply with the girl's golden locks and sky-blue eyes. An immense difference, but for some reason, they seem to work.

Hanai felt his heart thump in his chest as the girl said something to Tajima and laughed. He watched Tajima's eyes grow soft and slowly, the cleanup batter leaned down and gently kissed her on the lips. His hands gradually pulled the girl into him, an almost hesitant and cautious gesture, but when she pressed closer, Tajima didn't grab her as Hanai thought he would. Instead, his hand reached to smooth back her hair, and he smiled in an almost abashed manner. Whoa. Hanai's eyes widened. Never before had he seen Tajima act so gentle, so caring and delicate when handling someone. This was the very same person, who, only a few months ago, declared that he masturbated before and after a game everyday, who streaked around in public without a clear thought for others. How could this very same person, with such a crude and loud personality, be capable of such affectionate gestures...?

I-

I want... him to be like that...with...me...-

Wait... What?

No!

The baseball captain quickly whirled around, skulking quickly from the scene before his thoughts ran rampant everywhere. Why am I thinking things like that anyway? It's completely idiotic. The wind scraped across his face, and tears welled up in his eyes. Hanai furiously wiped them away. That was the wind, dammit! He wasn't going to go around crying like a girl who'd just been heartbroken! And there was no way in the world that it had been a misunderstanding either...

He glanced back behind him, half in paranoia and half in hope. Thinking perhaps Tajima had somehow seen him spying on them and decided to chase after him to clear up the situation. "I-it's not what you think!" Tajima would say, breathless and panting from running. "It's not her I like! It's you, Hanai. It's always been you!" And then Tajima would cutely lean forward on his toes to kiss him as gently as he'd kissed the girl, and whisper, "I made a mistake, but I want to clear it up now. Because it's Hanai I want. Only Hanai."

Of course, when he turned, all he saw was an empty, white hallway. Of course Tajima would never ever say something like that, because he obviously was in love with girls, one girl in particular at the moment. And when they went to practice the next day, Tajima would treat him the same as he always did. With almost uncaring indifference, with only occasional words that clearly implied they were friends, but not even close enough friends to hang out with each other everyday. Because that was how his relationship with Tajima worked, ever since the first day they met. Ever since he realized that he had slowly, unexpectedly, fallen for Tajima some where along the way...that he had begun to think of Tajima as more than a friend.

Hanai lowered his eyes to the ground as the wind picked up again. He wondered what Tajima and the girl was doing now, if they had even done it yet. They were already nearing the end of their 2nd year, almost upperclassmen now. They weren't the kids they were back when Nishiura's baseball team had just formed. Tajima had a girlfriend now, and he was pretty sure their star batter wasn't the only one. Soon, everyone else would grow up, high school and baseball would end, and they would move on to own separate ways.

And he probably wouldn't be able to see Tajima ever again.

Dammit... Hanai sank to the floor, clenching his fists. His heart was hurting like crazy.

Things were so much simpler when they were friends, before he started to have those weird feelings for Tajima.

Before he started thinking about their near impossible future.

A/N: I heard a song and it just fit Tajima and Hanai so much, and I couldn't resist trying a fanfic for them. I've been obsessin' for awhile, so I'm going to give it a try :'D