o.O.o

"Lily!"

"No."

"But, Lily!"

"No, James!"

James pouted. "But why not?" he whined, sending pleading eyes towards his wife.

"Because, James," Lily sighed, "We already decided."

"No, we didn't!"

"Yes, we did."

"Well, I don't remember!"

"Yes, you do."

"Well, so what? That doesn't mean anything. I changed my mind!" James huffed and crossed his arms.

"Nope. Not happening. You agreed."

"But I changed my mind!"

Lily raised an eyebrow. "And exactly how many hours of labor did you go through?" she inquired.

"Hey! Without me, he wouldn't be here."

"You don't see me trying to name him "Lily", do you?"

"Well, no," James adjusted his glasses. "That'd be ridiculous. Not to mention, he'd be teased the rest of his life."

"Exactly."

"What's ridiculous about the name James?"

"You're not naming the child after yourself, James."

"It's a nice name!"

"Yes," she agreed as she tugged him down towards the bed for a kiss. "It's a very nice name. But," she smiled against his lips, "there's no way I'm putting up with your narcissism a second time around."

"Just because he's named after me doesn't mean he'll- I'M NOT NARCISSISTIC!"

Lily leaned back against the bed and laughed loudly. "Of course you're not," she soothed placatingly. James frowned.

"Do you really think I'm narcissistic?"

"What are you trying to name our child again?"

"Plenty of people name their children after themselves!"

"There's not exactly a dearth of narcissistic people out there, James."

"I'm not narcissistic. I just happen to like my name."

"Oh, really? So what are you going to call him?"

"James, of course."

"Really? Could get confusing."

"Well…" he hemmed. "I might have been thinking of calling him Junior… Just to make it easier on him!" he stammered, alarmed, and gently pushed her against bed as Lily tried to sit up. "No strenuous activity, Lily-kins- Healer's orders," he added firmly.

"I am perfectly capable of sitting up," Lily huffed as she batted James' hands away, "and if you think any son of mine is going to be called Junior, EVER, buddy," she grabbed his shirt and pulled him down, so that he was eye level with her, "you have another think coming."

James' shock turned into amusement as he grinned, eyes crinkling, and kissed her swiftly. "All right then," he compromised, "no Juniors around here."

She gazed suspiciously at him, clearly waiting for the rest. James didn't disappoint. He grabbed her and cuddled her close.

"Just Lily and the two amazing Jameses," he promised. She bit back a grin and swatted his arm.

"One James is enough to put up with, thank you very much."

James gasped in mock-horror. "Lily! You want to give up our son? How could you?"

"No," she giggled into his shoulder sleepily. "I want him to not have to live in his fathers' shadow."

"Oh. Because I'm such an awesome example of a man, you mean. Just unable to measure up to. Simply amazing."

Lily turned her head and gazed at the basinet.

"I think he's pretty amazing already," she murmured. He turned to look at the basinet as well.

"Yeah," he agreed, voice softening. "He really is, isn't he?" They stared in comfortable silence for a few moments. Then Lily yawned, breaking the silence. James looked back at her; his gaze grew, if possible, more tender. "Go to sleep, Lily. I'll watch over him, ok?"

Lily murmured an incoherent reply into his shirt, then pulled back to look at him seriously.

"If the Healer comes, no naming him until I'm awake." James smiled and pulled her head against his chest, but didn't answer. "I'm serious, James. No naming our child," she yawned, and drifted off to sleep. James looked down at her head, resting underneath his chin, and grinned; thanks to her sleepiness, he had avoided agreeing to her "request".

o.O.o

"JAMES!" The shout reverberated throughout the corridor, rang down two floors, bounced around the corner, shot into the cafeteria, and reached the ears of one suddenly very frightened James Potter. Remus, Sirius, and Peter turned as one and looked at James, who had suddenly gone as white as a sheet. "Gotta go," he choked out, and took off running down the corridor. He sprinted toward the door, and was almost out the door when Lily Potter suddenly appeared in front of him, scowling furiously and brandishing a piece of paper. James backtracked, whirling around and slamming straight into Sirius' chest. Sirius chuckled.

"What'd you do now, Potter?"

"Um…" James' eyes darted around nervously, but every possible way of escape was blocked by amused Marauders. Some friends, his brain scoffed, as he turned to face the wrath of the frankly terrifying redhead in the middle of the room.

"See, Lily dear, I didn't think it was that big of a deal-"

"That big of a deal!" Lily screeched, eyes wild. "James Potter, the name of our son is considered a big deal! How could you even think about- we specifically discussed this! I can't believe-"

"Now, Lily," James started as he shrank back slightly, "it's not as bad as you're making it out to be. I didn't name him James, see- just his middle name."

Lily swelled with righteous indignation. "You foul- narcissistic- sorry excuse for a husband!" She advanced towards James, who was rather wondering when his life would start flashing before his eyes, and brandished her wand threateningly. Luckily for James, however, a Healer stepped in between the couple.

"Excuse me, miss," she said politely but firmly. "While I don't doubt your husband deserves whatever's coming to him, I'm afraid you're not strong enough for such exertions. Now, if you'll please follow me…" And with that, she grasped Lily's wand-hand with an iron grip and led her off to her room. The piece of paper fell out of Lily's other hand and floated, gently, to the floor. Remus grabbed it and scanned the paper, letting out a guffaw before passing it to Sirius and Peter. James groaned and sank down into the seat behind him, putting his head in his hands.

"She hates me," he moaned into his hands. "She just birthed my child, and already she hates me." He glanced up with bleary eyes towards Remus. "How did this happen?"

"Well," chuckled Sirius as he sat down beside James, slinging a comforting arm around his shoulder, "I'd say it's because you're a melodramatic, narcissistic bastard." He paused to think. "That, and you went ahead and named him without her."

"I didn't think she'd take it this bad!" James moaned. "What am I supposed to do now?"

Remus rolled his eyes. "Well, since the birth certificate's both a legal and a magical document, it's nigh unchangeable." He heaved himself into the seat across from James. "I'd suggest apologizing. Groveling, maybe." He smirked.

"Why does everyone think it's so damn funny?" James glowered, head still hidden in his hands.

Remus, Sirius, and Peter exchanged looks before bursting out laughing. "Because it's so you, James," Peter guffawed.

"Well, at least he's got a nice name, anyways…," James muttered before standing. "Well, I'm off to apologize. And possibly grovel." He glanced around at his friends. "If I don't survive, you all are the best mates a guy could ever ask for. And keep little H.J. safe for me, alright? Make sure he's instilled with the proper Marauder spirit…" he sighed, looking balefully at the doors. Sirius and Remus got up and pushed him, as one, towards the doors.

"Go on, you big baby. You'll be fine," Sirius laughed.

"You sure?" James muttered darkly, mentally picturing the murderous look on Lily's face.

"Yes, James." Remus sighed. "Now go!" And with that, they pushed him through the swinging doors to meet his doom.

With James finally gone, the three collapsed into laughter once again. They wound down after a few minutes, wiping away tears of mirth from their eyes.

"Harry- James- Potter," Sirius choked out.

"Lily looked about ready to murder him," Peter recounted gleefully.

"Well, it could've been worse," Remus pointed out. "At least he didn't name him James Harry. Can you imagine?"

"Lily would've killed him."

"We'd never get James to shut up about him."

"Ugh- what if he called him Junior?"

"You know he'd love that."

"Poor kid- no one deserves to be called Junior."

Still chuckling intermittently, they pushed open the doors to the pregnancy ward, intent on finding James and saving him from the clutches of his fiery-tempered wife.

o.O.o

A/N- Hey, all! Hope you enjoyed. Although this is, as you can tell, a Lily/James one-shot, it's in a bit of a different era than my other collection of Lily/James one-shots. So, I decided to start another collection, for Lily and James after they've graduated Hogwarts. It seemed easier and less confusing. As usual (not that it's changing anytime soon), I own nothing Potter-verse-wise. Reviews are greatly appreciated!