"I'm sorry, Kaidan, but I… kind of have something going on with Garrus," Shepard reluctantly admitted.

Comprehension filled him. "After Horizon…?" Shepard nodded. "Right. Well, not the answer I was hoping for."

"Times are… complicated."

"Oh, I understand. It's okay." And he meant it. He really did. "So, when does that steak get here? Incidentally, you'd better be buying now," he joked, trying to dispel the tension and her guilt.

"What'd you call it? A sanity check?" Shepard chuckled back.

Yeah. Yeah, it really was.

Kaidan had always known his actions back on Horizon would fuck things up between him and Shepard. She had come back ("clinically dead" she'd said) after two years—sporting Cerberus colors, no less— and he hadn't been able to cope. Not after he had spent the majority of the two years mourning and unsuccessfully trying to move on from the enigma that was Shepard. Not after mere seconds of Horizon's colonists being kidnapped by the Collectors that, till then, had been believed to be pure myth. Needless to say, it had been a shitty fucking day—made complete with a cherry on top with Delan's oh-so-companionable voice serving as ambiance.

"You're letting how you feel about their history get in the way of the facts!" Garrus argued when Kaidan brought up Cerberus. Even in the midst of his unbelieving anger, Kaidan felt a sharp pang of petty jealousy. Of course she found Garrus first. These two were the epitome of "two peas in a pod". Even back on the Normandy SR-1—

"Nice to see some things don't change," Joker's voice echoed from the cockpit, thankfully interrupting one of Kaidan's least proudest moments. Kaidan's head shot up—he hadn't realized he'd aimlessly walked back to the Normandy.

Attempting to put on the mask of indifference, Kaidan replied, "Like what?"

Joker spun around in his Cerberus-supplied fine leather seat. "Oh, I don't know. The dead silence in the ship—save for the eerie creaking of my joints— when everyone else is out having fun on shore leave—"

"Jeff, if you wish to partake in the rare occasions of shore leave, my physical platform can accompany and assist you—"

"EDI, you're messing up my groove! Anyways, the dead silence, the mostly alien crew despite this being an Alliance ship, Shepard riding in on her white horse to save the galaxy again, and… what else…" He made a show of looking very forgetful: face scrunched up in thought and tapping his index finger on his bearded chin. "Oh! You pining over said knight," Joker finished with a shit-eating grin only he could perfect.

So visibly shocked (he's pretty sure his face is blanched and his eyes are impossibly wide) that even Joker saw through him, Kaidan made the mistake of staying silent for too long. Which became Joker's cue to burst out in laughter— his face turning a bright red and breaths coming in short wheezes and "Oh my God, your face! I'm gonna crack a rib! Stop it!".

"Would you like me to alert Dr. Chakwas to your condition, Jeff?" EDI's smooth (and weirdly concerned? Kaidan noticed) voice cutting through Joker's delight and Kaidan's utter embarrassment.

Joker's laughter came to an abrupt halt as he whipped his head in EDI's direction. "What, no! Damn, ruin my only fun, why don't you." He turned back to Kaidan. "Sorry, man. Didn't mean to poke fun at you. It's just… you looked like you just saw a litter of stray kittens drown in the Presidium's reservoirs."

Kaidan relaxed his shoulders and leaned into the entrance of the cockpit. Joker was cynical and sarcastic to the rest of the crew, but he'd never minded Kaidan's occasional heart-to-heart. Kaidan suspected the man maintained that particular perk with Shepard.

Kaidan crossed his arms and took a deep breath. "I asked her if she wanted to pick up from where we left off." Joker winced. "But she's moved on. And if Garrus is the one who makes her happy, I'm not complaining."

"Look, I would've said something, but… how do you tell someone, 'Hey, buddy you. Your old flame's dumped you for an alien. And it's not even an asari.'"

It was Kaidan's turn to wince. "If you ever need to utilize that need to tell someone their ex-girlfriend found someone else, maybe don't use that line." Joker shrugged. "Frankly, thinking back, I'm surprised they didn't happen sooner. Even back on the SR-1, they were close. I found myself feeling defensive most of the time. But Garrus never made a move. Of course, he probably saw her as some sort of a mentor."

Joker's mouth twisted into a smirk. "Shepard did always like to impart some of her wisdom. Never did anything for me, but he absorbed it like a sponge. Pulled out half the stick that was lodged up his ass. Mind you, it's a pretty huge stick." Kaidan snorted in response. "So… you're okay with Shepard and Garrus?"

Kaidan pondered the question. Was he okay with Shepard cheating on him? Okay, maybe not the best term considering the circumstances at the time, he thought. Was he okay with Garrus swooping in and taking her breath away? He thought back to the SR-1.

Shepard and Garrus were always bantering. On the ship, off the ship, in battle, after battle. One of the more memorable banter Kaidan was witness to occurred while Shepard, Garrus, and he were running around on Port Hanshan in Noveria, feeling out that crap-hat Anoleis and helping the more likable Lorik Qui'in. Shepard had just finished talking to Qui'in and regrouped when she noticed Gianna Parasini, Anoleis' secretary.

"Oh yeah, she told me to meet her here. Wonder what she wants. Maybe she'll feel charitable and tell us what the hell we need to know," Shepard murmured.

"How many more favors are we going to hand out? Because I don't know if you've heard, but turians don't like the cold, Shepard," Garrus grumbled back. Kaidan had to agree with Garrus. These people were not saints and the blistering cold was affecting his famed patience.

Shepard glanced back at Garrus and grinned. "Why, does the cold make you shrink too? Hurts your ego?"

"Shepard! What—I mean—" Kaidan spluttered. Garrus frowned in utter confusion.

"No, but it's really weird that humans do. Most other species just wear thicker clothing." He looked the two humans over. "Kaidan looks about the same height. Shepard—I can never tell with you. You're so small that I can't see you under my cowl."

Shepard smacked his arm as Kaidan explained, "No, humans don't shrink when they're cold. Not in the way you're thinking of, at least." Kaidan took a deep breath. "When human males get cold… their—ugh, please don't make me say it out loud. This is hardly appropriate."

Garrus stared. And stared. Mandibles tight against his face as realization reached him. Then he slowly moved his arm and gave Kaidan a sympathetic pat on the shoulder. "It's okay, Kaidan. I have enough ego to go around. But in the future, try to…" At this, his eyes flew to Shepard and he gave Kaidan a knowing grin. "… in a warm room." Both Shepard and Kaidan slapped the back of his head hard, just under the fringe. "My, my. If you wanted me to join…"

Shepard barked out in laughter, "I'd die before I considered you for sex, Vakarian."

Kaidan chuckled and shook his head as he remembered Shepard's response to Garrus' playful proposition. I wonder if they remember what she said. I bet they'd get a good laugh, Kaidan thought fondly.

"Kaidan," came a dual-toned voice awkwardly from behind him. Joker craned his neck as Kaidan spun around. Garrus was shifting his feet, holding in one hand what sounded to be a duffel bag filled with empty bottles and another duffel bag of questionable content in the other hand.

Garrus carefully set the two bags down and cleared his throat. "Can I, uh, have a word with you?" The two humans glanced at each other and back at Garrus.

"Uhh, yeah. Sure thing, Garrus."

Joker swiveled his chair back into position. "So, EDI. About that offer… you still up for it?"

Garrus led Kaidan towards the galaxy map in the CIC.

"Okay, what's up?"

Garrus stayed quiet, eyes trained on Kaidan's curious ones. Kaidan was about to break the silence with a terrible human joke when Garrus spoke up. "Shepard and I—we've been through a lot together. I understand you have as well. But it doesn't change the fact that you hurt her—whether it was back on Horizon when you shut her down without letting her get a word in, or even on Mars when you questioned her existence and ties to Cerberus. You hurt her."

Kaidan stared back into Garrus' intense eyes in acceptance of his angry accusations. After all, he was right. As much as he wished he hadn't reacted the way he had, what's done is done. He'd broken what was left of their relationship and turned his back on her while she—with Garrus—had marched into the home of the Collectors and blew it all to kingdom come. What had occurred at the Mars Archives was just as bad, if not worse.

"But you're still important to her," Garrus continued. Kaidan noticed his eyes had lost their fiery gleam. "So I have to ask: are you and Shepard good? Are…" He gestured to the space between them. "…we good?"

This time, Kaidan didn't need to think about it. He'd already come to a decision talking to Shepard and Joker. He patted Garrus' shoulder and genuinely smiled. "Yeah, Garrus. We're good." Garrus rose his browplates in question. "Really."

Garrus blew out a breath and nodded in relief. "Good. I didn't want to persuade you by showcasing the different ways I could make you shrink." He shot a glance downwards and smirked. Kaidan followed his gaze, barked out a laugh, and slapped Garrus' arm.

Kaidan composed himself and gestured towards the duffel bags. "You have somewhere to be?"

Garrus glanced at the bags and cleared his throat. "Right. Glad we got this straightened out and, uhh, I'll see you." He walked over to the bags and gave Kaidan a nod before leaving.

Joker swerved his chair around and raised his eyebrow at Kaidan. "I'm hoping you two settled things because EDI can only 'forget' to recycle the oxygen of one room before it's noticeable. And we happen to not mind the occupants of the main battery and starboard observation deck."

Kaidan shot him a look of horror. "Jesus Christ, Joker! Everything's good, we're fine!" Joker shrugged and spun his chair back. Kaidan cast a look through the cockpit's window with a sense of peacefulness he hadn't felt in a very long time.

"Yeah. Everything's good."