Statue Shenanigans
By Kiki Lelsissia
Rated T to be safe.
Some implied pairings, including Axel/Roxas.
Disclaimer: This did actually happen to me, but I turned it into fanfiction. That means I don't own it.
Warning: Slash! Hilarious and dirty situations. Fictional characters making fools out of themselves in public.
Oh yeah… I'm trying to write this in third person using past tense. If I made any errors, please tell me.
DEDICATED TO Jyo-chan. Because she's cool, her stories make me laugh, she dedicated something to me, and she needed motivation. :D
Thoughts are in italics!
The students of Destiny Islands High School, well, the choral students at least, were on a school trip. Said school (read: choral) trip consisted of going to Radiant Garden, singing in a competition, going on a ghost tour, and spending the following day at an amusement park. But I'm getting ahead of myself. This story is about what happened shortly before the ghost tour…
-woo!-
Roxas O'Neil was bored. Six hour bus rides do that to people. Especially to sophomores with ADD. Sure, it was a charter bus, but still. Having to be stuck in a small bus seat with your hyperactive best friend next to you sucked. However, the bus was gone for now. Roxas and his friends were currently standing in historic downtown Radiant Garden. Their chorus teacher and the chaperones were standing in a group, discussing what to do before the ghost tour started.
"Hey, Roxas!" Someone called.
Roxas turned around to see some of his best friends waiting for him.
"We're gonna go walk around until the tour starts. You coming?" His seatmate, Axel Delacruz, asked.
Roxas shrugged. "Yeah, sure. Not like I got anything else to do."
Roxas, Axel, Demyx Belmonte, Xigbar Benedict, Zexion Pletcher, and a few others headed off up the cobblestone street.
A few moments later, Axel stopped.
"Hey, guys! Let's get a picture with this statue!"
Pence Merchant, being the one with the camera, volunteered to take the picture. Everyone watched as Axel posed with the statue. It was of some famous person to Radiant Garden, Yen Sid maybe?
Roxas felt himself blushing. This… this was…
"Axel?! What the?"
Axel looked up. "What?"
"Dude, are you…?" Xigbar asked.
"Axel, that looks incredibly wrong."
Zexion sighed. The statue, whoever it was, was sitting on a bench. Axel had draped himself just about on top of the statue, and was doing a peace sign for the camera with a very… dirty expression on his face. Time for Zexion to vacate the premises temporarily… before it got too much weirder.
"Ooh! Ooh! My turn! Pence, take my picture too!"
Demyx ran over, pushed Axel away from the statue, and promptly seated himself on its lap. Right before Pence took the picture; Axel snuckbehind them both and gave Demyx bunny ears.
Roxas shrugged. "Hey, may as well."
He had consumed a lot of sugar on the trip to Radiant Garden, so his brain was functioning on a serious sugar high. That is, it wasn't functioning. The next thing Roxas knew, he and Axel were both messing with the statue, Axel embracing it dramatically and Roxas acting like a scorned lover.
Pence found himself chuckling as he snapped picture after picture of his friends in compromising positions with the statue. Xigbar had joined in as well, having nothing better to do.
Xigbar had posed for a picture, poking "Yen Sid" in the eye and miming an evil laugh. Demyx perched on top of the statue's head, don't ask how he managed it. He looked like he was trying to eat the head.
"Yen Sid" was holding a book, and Axel's next picture was of him pointing at the book with a shocked expression.
"Yen Sid, I'm shocked!"
He was pretending the book was porn or something, Roxas guessed.
The next picture was of Axel and Roxas, both fake kissing one of the statue's cheeks while Demyx and Xigbar looked on in shock.
Pence grabbed a random passing student, turned out to be Naminé Jacques, a mezzo soprano in the Destiny High Chorus, and got her to wield the camera so he could join. After a few pictures she (now blushing heavily) passed it off to another choral student, alto Selphie Tilmitt. Needless to say, Selphie kept it for a while.
A few more pictures. Demyx played air sitar while sitting in "Yen Sid's" lap. Xigbar jumped over the statue while Roxas lay"asleep" beside it. Axel scared Roxas half to death after jumping on him while he was pretending to sleep. Pence gave the statue a hug. And Selphie's personal favorite picture, taken right after Axel jumped on Roxas: the two of them making out while sitting on the statue's lap.
"Whoa…" Pence murmured.
All Roxas could think was "Hey… this is really nice…"
The sounds of an approaching tour group jolted the friends out of their sugar filled, dirty little world. And by approaching I mean "right on top of them because they didn't notice."
"And this is Ansem the Wise, ruler of Radiant Garden before the war…"
Roxas paled, having just realized that he was making out with his best friend, his male best friend, on top of a statue of Ansem the Wise. Axel laughed and took Roxas' hand, pulling him away from the tour group.
"Oh man, that was Ansem the Wise!"
"All those statues look the same, dude." Xigbar laughed.
Pence retrieved his camera from Selphie and rejoined the group, waving his camera triumphantly.
"Who wants copies of these?"
Almost the entire group laughed and raised their hands.
A moment later, Zexion came over, having stopped reading his book long enough to see that they were leaving.
"What did I miss?"
No one replied for a moment until…
"Hey, there's another statue!"
-Owari-
A/N: Actually inspired by some good old statue molesting done by me and my friends on our chorus trip in late April. I was not the one wielding the camera, that's all I'll say… :D I loved it so much, I decided to turn it into a oneshot and share it with the world. Well, the yaoi fan world at least. Took me a while to get this out, but that's okay. A bit short, but I think the situation makes up for it.
All for Jyo-chan, to increase her motivation on her current story, Ontruim La Vida, and because I've felt like I owed her a dedication for a long time. So I finally stopped being lazy and did it. Hope you enjoyed it!
If you need anything to read, I definitely recommend any of Jyo-chan's stories. They're all awesome. Or you could look at my others; I have five oneshots and a recently finished chapter story. Jyo-chan is number 15 on my favorite author list.
Hope you enjoyed it! Please review. :3
Thanks!
-Kiki