"You stand awkwardly behind Buffy as she asks Spike to stay with you for a while. "I know you'll keep them safe" Buffy gave Spike a knowing look, "But if anything happens to them, you're dust" Buffy warned before she turned, hugged you and left into the night. You looked around the musty crypt that Spike called his home, it was impressive really the way he had managed to make it resemble a living room.
"It's not a museum, love. Sit if you like" he nodded towards the dilapidated couch as you slowly made your way to sit in front of his tv.
"Can we watch a film?" you asked, feeling stupid as if you were a kid being babysat. You're 19, you don't need to ask permission you thought. Spike's face appeared to light up, although he changed his expression and turned back to the drink he was mixing in the corner. You knew Spike had a soft spot for you, it had been clear in the way he had always managed to appear when you were in danger, but you told yourself it was most likely because you were the only one of the Scoobies that really treated Spike as if he was a person.
"'Course we can, pet. There'll be something on the box, usually is" he said as he threw himself down, a glass in each hand. "Fancy it?" he asked as he held a glass out to you with a red liquid in it.
"It's not blood, is it?" You asked only half serious before reaching for the glass in his hands. Your fingers lightly touched his as the glass was handed over and both of you looked towards the tv just as quickly. You took a sip of your drink, it was a Vodka-cranberry. "My favourite" you whispered, glancing at Spike.
"I know" Spike said smugly, before realising he had given too much away, "Think I saw you order one at the Bronze once" he tried to cover himself. Spike started to flick through the channels as he took a big swig of his own drink, although his was more blood than cranberry. He finally stopped on a black and white movie that you didn't recognise, as you finished your drink and started to cross your legs for a more comfortable position on the small couch. Your eyelids started to feel heavy as you blinked to keep your eyes open, the empty glass tipping in your hands.
"You want another, pet?" He asked, motioning towards your glass as he got up with his own now empty glass in his hand.
"No, I'm okay thanks. I'm feeling a bit tired" You replied, you'd never been a heavy drinker and your day on the run from the latest big bad had finally caught up with you. He shrugged as he removed the glass from your weak hold and went to refill his own. When Spike returned, he sat himself closer on the couch than he had before although you weren't sure if he had noticed, you definitely had even through your sleepy state. Your eyes started to stay closed longer, comforted by his presence even though you thought you probably shouldn't be. Your head slumped backwards, landing on spike's chest. He tensed in surprise as he felt your weight shift against him but found himself smiling softly. He watched you for a while before slowly bringing his hand up to where your head rested on his chest and twirled his fingers between your hair, his touch a lot softer than you would have expected.
"I'm bloody drowning in you, love" He whispered, his words barely audible, a sadness in his eyes as he believed this was the closest, he would ever get to showing you how he felt. He leaned in and pressed a soft kiss on your forehead and your eyes snapped open as you turned to look him in the eyes. Spike's embarrassment was painted across his face as he found a sudden interest in the contents of his glass, not able to return your gaze.
"What did that mean?" You asked sitting up straighter, rubbing your eyes that were still heavy with sleep.
"What?" He pretended not to know what you meant, but his body shifted with an obvious discomfort.
"You're drowning in me?" you pressed further. You needed to know. Spike turned to face you, he took an unnecessary breath and looked you in the eyes.
"I didn't mean for it to happen, but I can't help myself and I just-I love you" He finally admitted.
"Spike-"
"Don't, okay? I get it. I know this- it isn't right." He interrupted, not willing to hear your rejection. He stood up and turned as if to walk away, down the stairs. You stood up and stared after him, were you going to do this?
"I feel the same" your words came out quiet, unsure if you should admit it. He stared at you, confused for a second before closing the gap between you and pressing you close to him as he caught you in a rough kiss, his hands in your hair as everything he has felt for you was rushing to the surface. He paused and pulled away, his hands cupping your cheeks on either side.
"You mean it?"
"I love you, Spike" you confirmed, as you both smiled at each other. He leaned down again, pressing a slower and gentler kiss to your lips.