I got very inspired after going to this post-Christmas dinner yesterday and seeing the EXACT same thing happen between these two little itty-bitty kids as what is written here. It was soooo precious that I had to make a fic from it. And since I've been wanting to write a ShikaIno story forEVAR (they are so CUTE together!) this is what you get. Enjoooooyyyyy!


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ITTY-BITTY

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Ahem, so once upon a time there were two little itty-bitty kids who loved each other very, very much.

Their names were Ino and Shikamaru.

Nah.. scratch that. They actually HATED each other very very much.

Here, see for yourself:

It is Christmas in the Nara household. Three-year-old Shikamaru is polishing his new shougi set (what?! He's mature for his age!!). Ino, also three years old, is having fun rolling on the floor and playing with her new dolls (what?! She's normal for her age!!). They are both sitting in a nice little playing tent they BOTH got for Christmas (which by the way the grown-ups worked their ass off to put up).

Shikamaru has to pause in his shougi set-cleaning to lift up his bum a little (he had too many beans for dinner... and you know what beans can do to you).

He shifts back to his original position comfortably, only to be suddenly shocked out of his elements when the worst sound EVER pierced his ears.

It is Ino, red in the face and bawling her eyes out.

All at once the grown-ups come rushing over and start fussing over her. Shikamaru's mama looks at him reproachfully and scolds, "Did you hit Ino again? How many times do I have to talk to you about this, Shikamaru!!! Little boys should not bully little girls!!"

Shikamaru only stares back. He has gotten used to this kind of incident.

Let's just say it wasn't the FIRST time Ino started randomly crying for no reason!! I mean, all Shikamaru did was SIT DOWN!!! (and fart but since he didn't smell anything too bad Ino couldn't be crying over THAT could she!!)

Actually, he was right, Ino didn't smell anything. But unbeknownst to him when he sat back down, he sat on Ino's hair (remember she was lying on the floor). And obviously when Ino tried to move she ended up yanking her own hair, creating A LOT of pain and suffering.

Hence the crying.

Anyway, so Ino is prone to crying. Shikamaru could only postulate with annoyance that it was because she was a girl and girls did troublesome things like cry all the time. When little girls grow up, they stop crying and start SCREAMING. This is a most likely accurate theory because his mother screams at his dad all the time.

And when Ino cries, SHIKAMARU gets the blame. Even when he usually didn't do anything wrong (nothing he was aware of anyway).

Even though Shikamaru has to deal with this kind of totally unrighteous treatment, he still sucks it up like the little man he was.

But then on this fateful day, as Ino quiets down to sniffles and the grown-ups return back to the kitchen (where they were in an intense game of poker), Shikamaru's mama (as she looks over her shoulder) says, "Shikamaru, be good or I'm taking away your shougi set! I'm serious!"

Shikamaru looks at Ino.

And sees her stick out her tongue with a very smug smile on her cute baby face.

And even though Shikamaru has an IQ of 200 (unbeknownst to him), he went against his better judgement.

Because there is always a time when emotion vanquishes reason!!!

And Shikamaru was VERY emotional. Very angrily emotional. Because Ino just laughed at his SHOUGI SET being taken away and... ooh, that just takes the cake!!!

So what did Shikamaru do as his revenge?

Why, he took the plastic giant fork (a gift from the Akimichi clan) lying next to him and whacked Ino on the arm.

And you know what? HE ENJOYED IT.

As you can surely guess, what follows is a lot of wailing and shrieking. And kicking. (As a plus Ino chose to kick the tent, resulting in the tent collapsing and then a lot of irritated grown-ups groaning.)

Thus ends a lovely Christmas at the Nara household!!

Ahem. So what is the moral of the story? That there were once two little-itty kids named Ino and Shikamaru who hated each other very, very much. The end!

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"You know, I really wish you'd stop telling that story," said Ino.

"But why? It's a great story!!" chuckled Ino's dad, Inoshi, who was very cheery when he gets a bit drunk. "And it's all true!! Here, you want to see those pictures again? We have this great shot of you trying to bite Shikamaru's ear..."

Shikamaru sighed. "I remember. I had to use my shougi board to shield myself."

Ino crossed her arms. "Yeah, yeah, you and your stupid daaaarrling shougi board!"

"... are you jealous of my shougi board, Ino? Or should I say, were you jealous?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh, I get it. So that's why you stuck out your tongue."

"Shikamaru, stop being so full of yourself!"

"Ow! What was that for?"

"For that time! That stupid fork hurt you know!"

"I thought you said you don't remember."

"I don't!! Now wipe that smirk off your face or do you want me to hit you again!!"

"Ahem."

They turned to look at the interruption. "WHAT?!"

"Um... can we get on with it please? I still have another ceremony to perform after this."

"Oh, sorry." Ino looked sheepish. Shikamaru muttered "troublesome" which caused Ino to step on his shoe.

The priest cast them a nervous glance (wouldn't want to see the outcome of this one, he thought). "Ok, then. I'll begin."

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to join this man and this woman..."


HERE ENDS THE STORY OF TWO ITTY-BITTY KIDS WHO HATED

BUT ALSO LOVED

EACH OTHER VERY, VERY MUCH

(f i n)