A/N: This is a prompt my friend (who is my prompt friend) sent me a week ago and it's probably the fastest I've written a oneshot.
Prompt: "kom has Dsm over for a practice and they're in like the living room or something with the furniture pushed out of the way (it's like 5 maybe 6 in the morning) and beca comes out in Pj's and is just "iT IS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP." So Kom takes everyone outside and makes then run instead (bonus points if beca trips on the pushed aside furniture)"
Beca rolled over in bed in her sleep, wrapping the blanket burrito she had made from tossing and turning all night tighter around her body. She sighed softly and nuzzled her head into the pillows beneath her, resting as peacefully as ever. She had Luisa by her side (or so she thought) and an unusually, but extremely comfortable bed. All was well in the world of Beca Mitchell.
"Mach es nochmal!"
Or not.
Am I dreaming? Please tell me I'm dreaming. I'm going to cry if I'm not dreaming. If I'm dreaming, why am I dreaming in German?
Beca opened her eyes slowly, trying to wake herself up more than the random burst of foreign shouting had. The lack of blinding sunlight pouring into the room through the window next to the bed frustrated her; she knew that she definitely shouldn't have been awake.
"Luisa," she groaned, her voice heavy with exhaustion. After what they had done earlier that night, Beca assumed that Luisa would have been in bed for the next week from fatigue. She felt around next to her on the mattress, expecting to find the warmth of DSM's illustrious leader's body in the fetal position (which was how she often slept) under the comforter. Instead, Beca's hand met a neatly made down comforter and fuzzy pillow. "Where the hell…?"
"Sie tanzen wie die lästigen mollig Mann aus dem Keller -Party!"
Beca's eyes widened at the yelling that resonated from outside Luisa's bedroom. She rolled over to face the alarm clock that displayed a blinking 4:45 am. She groaned so loud, she wouldn't have been surprised if someone came to Luisa's door with a noise complaint. She didn't want to get up, but if she was going to be asleep again before the sun rose, she had no choice. Her legs tingled as she wriggled her way out of the blanket burrito and flung them over the side of the bed, rotating her ankles in an attempt to regain feeling.
"Geben Sie mir 50 Push-ups!"
She understood 'push ups' and cringed.
Who the hell is doing push ups this early in the morning?
Beca reluctantly maneuvered herself out of bed and padded across the cold hardwood floor to the bedroom door, turning the doorknob slowly. She was anything but prepared to be blinded by the light that dimly illuminated the room from under the door. As the door creaked open, the light from the lights that had been turned on in the living room pierced her corneas, causing her head to ache.
"Luisa?" Beca called out as she stalked down the small hallway towards the living room, still trying to wake herself up completely. The foreign chattering in the distance ceased, disorienting the already extremely disoriented Bella.
I really hope this is a dream. If it was reality, I would be sleeping next to a hot German until next week.
As Beca approached the living room, she was greeted by all of the IKEA furniture she had helped Luisa purchase and build pushed up against the walls and Das Sound Machine, donned in assortments of black exercise wear, bunched up in the middle of the living room.
This isn't a dream, it's a nightmare. Why are they here? Why is the Kivik almost in the kitchen? Why is the Holmo on the Kivik? Where did the Lack go?
"Where's Lu– Kommissar?" Beca drowsily directed her question towards Pieter, who was standing in front of the group. Before he could respond, a familiar voice resonated from the middle of the room.
"You are weak, like an American." Grunting and a hard thud followed the thick German accent.
"I think you know," Pieter spoke with a grin, moving aside to reveal Aric, the group's beatboxer, face down on the floor with Luisa sitting legs crossed on his back.
"You make beats with your mouth, you cannot possibly be this weak."
"Hey," Beca quipped.
Luisa's eyes met cobalt blue ones brimming with exhaustion and frustration as she looked up from chastising the man under her.
"Tiny Maus, did I wake you?"
Beca scoffed, placing a hand on her hip.
"Did you wake me? Did you wake me?!" The volume of her voice increased with every word. "It is," Beca paused, stepping forward towards the group. Rather than making a swift and smooth entrance into the living room, the bottom of Beca's Star Wars pajama pants got caught on the Arkelstorp (IKEA for side table) that had been moved, sending her stumbling towards DSM.
Pieter caught Beca, who was now more alert, by the shoulders, attempting to prevent her from falling flat on her face and embarrassing herself in front of a bunch of Germans with unbelievably high standards for the human race.
"Thanks," Beca mumbled to Pieter as she stood up, straightening herself out and pretending she didn't almost eat shit in front of Das Sound Machine.
"It is," Beca continued, pointing at the clock that hung on the wall, "4:50 am! Normal people are usually asleep at this hour! Like me! I am usually asleep at this hour!"
Luisa climbed off of Aric's back and stood up, eliciting a sigh of relief from the burly German who was still face down on the ground.
"I'm sorry, Maus, I didn't know our little rehearsal would be such a bother," Luisa attempted to apologize to the tiny, fuming woman who stood in front of her.
"If you were sorry, you and your army of judgmental dummen Köpfe would shut the hell up so I can sleep!" Beca huffed, crossing her arms in front of her chest.
"My sweet Maus, when did you learn German?" Luisa flashed a triumphant grin at Beca, feeling like the little insults she constantly threw at the group were finding their way into Beca's fairly limited vocabulary.
"Don't flatter yourself, Chloe has called Das Sound Machine that at least three times within the past week." Beca's response shifted Luisa's grin of victory into her signature smirk.
"Wir sollten sie 'verschroben Maus' nennen," Pieter suggested, nudging Luisa in the side with his elbow.
Luisa chuckled and nodded, crossing her arms across her chest to mirror a very frustrated Beca.
"Sie ist verschroben, aber sie ist niedlich." No sooner than the words left Luisa's mouth, laughter erupted from the group behind her.
Beca furrowed her brows at what she could only assume was an insult, considering the judgy Germans who were still in the living room continued to laugh maniacally behind Luisa and Pieter.
"I want water," Beca huffed, shoving her way past the German girls that were huddled right behind Pieter. "Out of my way, Vagina Atem."
The girls scoffed, covering their mouths with their hands.
"Hat mir den Atem riechen wie Vagina?" the small brunette asked the two other girls she was just pushed into by Beca, cupping a hand over her mouth.
Beca was glad she could put an insult she heard Luisa throw at Pieter often to good use.
"She is very, very cranky," Pieter whispered in Luisa's direction.
Before Luisa could respond, Beca came barging out of the kitchen with a Frozen cup and handful of Oreos.
"Why is the fucking coffee table in the middle of the kitchen?!" Beca asked Luisa loudly, Oreo crumbs falling from her mouth as she spoke. As if she wasn't disoriented enough.
"We didn't want to dance on the tables and the couches so we moved them all," Pieter responded for Luisa.
"The middle of the kitchen, though? Like, really? I could have tripped and died, it's fucking dark in there. No IKEA furniture belongs in the kitchen. Ever," Beca replied, shoving the Oreo cookies into the pocket of her pajama pants.
"We will move it back when we are finished with are booty kicking dance rehearsal," Pieter promised the tiny ball of frustration and enervation that stood in front of him. He wasn't quite sure why, though, considering the fact that she didn't live there.
"Thanks. Now if you don't mind," Beca cleared her throat so she could project to every single dummen Köpfe in the room, "please shut the fuck up or get out so I can go back to sleep. Thanks so much."
As Beca turned around to head back to bed, Luisa stopped her, placing a hand on her shoulder.
"Wait, Maus," she spoke sweetly, which Beca wasn't used to.
"What?" Beca turned around, growing angrier and angrier at every second she wasn't in bed and asleep.
"Where do you expect us to go?" Luisa gestured to the group behind her.
"I don't know, to hell?" Beca replied sarcastically, taking a loud sip out of the Queen Elsa cup in her hand.
Luisa furrowed her brow at Beca's response.
"Look, Maus. I understand you are tired, but that doesn't mean you need to be, how do you Americans say, a dickdumpster."
Beca stared at the German woman with a straight face.
"I hope you realize what you just said. I'm going to sleep." Beca waved her cup in the air as she turned back around, heading towards the bedroom.
"But what do we do?" Luisa called after Beca, who was walking into the bedroom.
"Run 10 miles, I don't know!" Beca called back, slamming the bedroom door shut right after.
Luisa sighed, walking back towards Das Sound Machine.
"What are we doing?" Pieter questioned as Luisa approached him.
She gestured for him to wait.
"Wer will 5 Meilen laufen?" Luisa called out to the group, immediately eliciting dozens of moans and groans. "Go!"
"Warum ist sie hier?" a voice asked loudly from the middle of the group as they shuffled towards the door.
"Noch ein Wort, und wir führen Sie eine weitere Meile," Luisa responded, ushering DSM out the door. She wouldn't have heard the end of it if the group found out what happened the night before.
Translations
"Mach es nochmal!"
"Do it again!"
"Sie tanzen wie die lästigen mollig Mann aus dem Keller -Party!"
"You dance like the annoying chubby man from the basement party!" (Bumper)
"Geben Sie mir 50 Push-ups!"
"Give me 50 push ups!"
"Wir sollten sie 'verschroben Maus' nennen."
"We should call her 'cranky Maus'."
"Sie ist verschroben, aber sie ist niedlich."
"She is cranky, but she is cute."
"Hat mir den Atem riechen wie Vagina?"
"Does my breath smell like vagina?"
"Wer will 5 Meilen laufen?"
"Who wants to run 5 miles?"
"Warum ist sie hier?"
"Why is she here?"
"Noch ein Wort, und wir führen Sie eine weitere Meile."
"One more word and we run another mile."