Title: Happy Glitter Apocalypse: A bad!fic Valentine's Day Fic that's Depressing
PLZ R&R!
Sgwun was the happiest team in the EssGeeSea. They were happy because their team was the best. They always got the best assignments, and they always got the coolest sunglasses. Everybody else wanted to be on sgwun, but they couldn't, because they weren't hot enough.
On Valentine's Day, Jack got a Special Present from Sam, only he was sad because he couldn't tell anyone else about it. Damn regs," he said and kicked the table. A Happy Glitter Fairy disguised as the President appeared and handed him an envelope. It was pink, and had glitter all over it. "You are my favorite, Jack, so i got you this Special Envelope of Regulation-Breakage for Valentines." The prisedent said. "Yay!" Jack said, and ran to tell everyone the good news. It was going to be the best Valentine's present ever.
Except for blue jello, but Jack didn't like blue jello, he only liked the red kind.
Of course, the Gulde picked that moment to invade, and because Jack was distracted by all the pretty glitter on the envelope, he didn't notice in time to do anything about it and the mountain blew up and all the Goulds invaded earth and everyone was made into slaves to work until they died.
And there was no jello, blue or not.
Teh end.