Today a man told me he loved me. Problem is, I've never seen or spoken to this man my entire life.
I was working the cash register when he first walked into the small little ice cream shop. I couldn't help but notice him right away; he was easily over six feet tall. His limbs were like skinny tree branches and he carried himself with an odd, confident sort of gait. His young face was surrounded by unruly, flaming red hair that looked too bright to natural. I found myself staring when he suddenly caught my eye with his own. His face instantly broke out into a wide grin, like we were old friends seeing each other for the first time in years. I don't think I noticed because I was too bust trying to act like I wasn't just caught staring at a complete stranger. My head is kept down while I finish ringing up the costumer I'm serving. A mother and her two kids, they're regulars.
Once they leave the stranger steps up to the counter. I reluctantly look up and his face seems like it is the very essence of happiness. "I love you," he says breathlessly without skipping a beat. I stare back at him, my eyes wide and my mouth agape. Before I can even say anything, he takes my hand and repeats himself. His bottle green eyes seem twelve times brighter when he's looking at me.
I yank my hand away and back up from the counter until I hit the wall behind me. Either this man escaped from the insane asylum or someone was playing a cruel joke. I'm glaring at him, which only seems to make him smile even more. I feel embarrassed and angry at the same time. I tell him he should leave; my hands are scrabbling blindly for the phone. His smile turns into a sad one and he asks me quietly, "Don't you remember me?"
"No!" I scream. Some of the patrons in the shop are starting to throw dirty glances at the man. He seemed to notice, but he leaned forward on the counter and begs for me to remember. I shake my head angrily. There's nothing TO remember, this man was insane! I finally grab the phone off the wall and poise my fingers over the numbers, a threat to call the police. He seemed to read what I was thinking. He raised his hands in surrender and backs away from the register.
"I'm sorry," he says, "I'm sorry." He looks away and his bright green eyes seem to dull over. I raise the phone again to remind him I could have the police here in a second, and he finally appeared to take the hint. "Sorry…Roxas," he whispered with one last glance before exiting the shop.
For a moment I couldn't move my body, and my eyes hadn't left the place the man was standing only moments ago. That man knew my name. I wasn't even wearing a nametag and he knew my name. I was pretty freaked out, but I was able to complete the rest of my shift without distraction. In fact, I had almost forgotten about the incident until I stepped outside and saw the man waiting for me at the corner. When he spotted me a grin split across his face and he jogged up to my side.
"I should warn you that I have mace," I growl, swinging my backpack over my shoulder. He just laughed; a laugh that was a little too friendly coming form a guy who was just threatened with pepper spray. I raised an eyebrow at him as he walked along side of me. One stride of his long legs would equal two of mine.
"You're still the same as ever Roxy," He placed his arm around my shoulder, which I quickly shrug off. I wrinkle my nose at the nickname and increase the space between us by taking a couple steps to the left.
"Don't touch me," I hissed, entirely uncomfortable with anything this man said or did. He looked a little put-off, but he nodded stiffly and shoved his hands into his pockets.
"Sooo, how long have you been working at the ice cream store?" He asked with a lopsided grin.
I felt my eyebrows furrow. Now he's trying small talk, is he? I decided not to encourage him so I kept my eyes forward and planned to keep my mouth shut until I reached the train station. The man however, was thinking on an entirely different level, if that still wasn't clear from before. He continued to playfully ask questions about myself, going on to the next one like he already knew the answer.
Finally I arrived at the train station, I reach into my bag and hand the tram employee my ticket card. He scans it and hands it back to me with an odd look at the rambling man next to me. I roll my eyes and slip the card back into my bag. I traveled on the train everyday to and from work, and I was always alone. All of the tram employees knew that. I walk past the gate and am closely followed by my new 'acquaintance'. He even followed me into the train car! I shoved him back out and blocked the door so he couldn't enter again. "No, I only paid for one ticket, you freeloader!" He wore a dejected look of a kicked puppy. I placed my hand on my hip and painted my face with a sarcastic smirk. "Ok listen, you crazy psychotic stalker," Why was he grinning at me like that? "I better not see you tomorrow, the day after that, or the day after that. Stop following me around or I WILL call the police and get a restraining order. Got it?" I explained this to him and he just smiled at me. He raised his hand and waved goodbye before the train's sliding door closed between us. The train squeaked against the rails and I plopped down into an empty seat. The car was empty; it usually is at this time of night. I slump forward and rub my temples. It seems that crazy redhead had given me a headache. I let out a shaky breath and try to calm myself. Looking out the window at the purple sky, I wondered why that man was so interested in me.
When I enter the shop the next day, I groan when I see the red-haired man sitting comfortably at one of the corner tables. He's absolutely beaming, he looked so happy to see me. I ignore him as best as I could and head into the back to start my shift.
The whole day, he sat at that table. The only time he moved was when he got up to get a newspaper from a nearby table that a costumer left behind. He sat back down and started skimming the headlines. I would occasionally shoot suspicious glares his way to see if he was ever up to anything, but he would always look up from his paper and our eyes would meet. I didn't like it. I didn't even go out for my lunch break in fear of having to talk to the man. But, when it was finally time to close down the shop for the day, he was waiting for me; crooked grin in place and newspaper tucked securely under his arm.
I made my usual route to the train station; it was pretty much a repeat from yesterday. The man was rambling about something excitedly, waving his arms with each explanation and detail. I had just paid for my ticket when I decided I couldn't take anymore of it.
"What is your deal!" I yelled, turning on my heel to face him.
"Huh? What do you mean?" He asked. His smile was faltering by a fraction.
"What I mean is, why are you doing this huh?" I make a quick gestured with my hand in between us. "Why are you following me around like I'm your long lost friend? I've never seen you my entire life!" I seethed.
His eyes saddened and he reached out to stoke my face, I slap it away before he can touch me. "Not in this life…no." He said quietly.
I feel myself bristle, "What do you mean, 'not in this life'?" Was this guy a nutcase or what? "What are you doing? Are you waiting for some sort of moment when you can take advantage of me like some creep and-"
"No no no no!" He cut me off so abruptly, his voice was laced with worry and I could see his eyes showed concern. "Please do not think that! God, that is the LAST thing I want you to think!" He hesitantly reached out to touch my face again, but he pulled back with his better judgment. He bit his bottom lip and looked like he was ready to grab me if I tried to run away. Just hold me and never let go. He let out a defeated sigh and his shoulders drooped. "The last thing I want for you to do is to hate me…" He slowly looked away and he clutched his chest, the spot that was right above his heart. I tried looking into his eyes; they were a dull green but seemed glassy.
I shifted my feet uncomfortable and adjusted the grip on my shoulder bag. "Well," I hesitated, not knowing what to say. "Why am I so special to you?" I honestly had nothing interesting about me; I was just a normal person. Short blonde hair that was always messy, boring blue eyes, what made ME stand out from the rest?
He tried to smile at me, but it looked like it was difficult. "Roxas, we were always together, er how do I explain this?" He scratched the back of his head and looked at his shoes in deep concentration. "Our souls, um…in past lives. We've always been together. Always…in love." He finished lamely, letting his arm flop down to his side. "And I'm sure you don't believe me and think I'm even crazier than before." I crossed my arms and raised an eyebrow. "But-but, How else could you explain how I know your name? Your favorite color?" His voice cracked at the effort he was defending himself with
"Oh yeah? What's my favorite color?" I asked, confident he was just taking random shots in the dark at this point.
A devious grin crept onto his face, "Green."
I growl angrily as my face turns red and I turn on my heel to finally board the train. "Goodbye!" I growl, I can feel steam fuming from my ears. The doors hiss closed and I'm at peace once more.
The man was back at the corner table when I arrived for my shift. Was he going to wait the whole day again? What has this man been doing with his life? I was planning on ignoring him again like I did yesterday, but my manager had other plans. Right before my break, he pulled me to the side and told me to take care of our new loiter. I tried to protest and tell him to have someone else do it, but I was the only one working the late shift at the time. Reluctantly I approached his table and felt like smacking that stupid smirk off his face. He leaned back in his chair and smugly laced his fingers together across his stomach.
"I'm going to have to kick you out if you don't buy something." I told him flatly.
His eyebrows shot up and he returned to his original position. "Oh well, uh. Anything you would recommend?" I couldn't help but smile to myself when I noticed I knocked him off his high horse.
I shrugged walked back behind the counter, "I dunno, but you better buy something soon."
"Alrighty then," He pushed himself up from the table and sauntered over to the displayed cooler by the register. He peered over through the glass to scan the tubs that were filled with ice cream of every color. He noticed an odd colored container that looked like it's never been touched; the smooth surface of light blue ice cream was shimmering with tiny ice crystals. "Sea salt ice cream?" he read off the label with a raised brow.
I didn't even look up, "Yeah, no one ever gets that kind." I vaguely wondered why my boss would even stock it.
"I'll get two cones of it," He said grinning at me.
I look up slowly, "Two?" There was no one else in the shop besides us.
"Yup," He went to the register and leaned on the counter in front of me, "One for me, and one for you. You're going on break soon, yeah?" He said this confidently, and I wanted to punch off that self satisfied look he seemed to be wearing since yesterday.
"Well, I don't think my boss would like it if-"
"Pshaaw, c'mon! He's not here; I just saw him leave about ten minutes ago! I'm even paying for you, we'll just sit over at the table and…talk." His eyes were just begging me.
I practically jam in a couple buttons of the register when I ring up his order. "Alright fine, if it will get you to stop bugging me…" I scowl. The man's eyes brightened, to the point when it looked like an acid green, which hurt my eyes to look at.
I bring over both of the cones to the table he took a seat at. He takes it with a thank you and starts eating it but stops when he noticed me looking at my own cone with a skeptical look. "What's wrong? This was your favorite ice cream flavor, well…before. I thought it was kinda funny since your work has it." I grumble and hesitantly take a lick. It was an odd sort of flavor for ice cream. At first it was like licking a saltlick, but than a creamy vanilla flavor spread over my tongue. "Well?" he's leaning over the table now, excited to see my reaction, like it would cause some sort of break through.
I shrug, "'s okay." I said quietly.
He just grinned and leaned back in his chair. "I knew you would like it. I've never seen you this timid before."
"Shut up!"
He tilted his head to the side and had a fake look of hurt on his face. "And yet, you revert so quickly to your stubborn brashness. Roxas, you're still the same." He laughed a little.
I take another lick of my ice cream, "Stop talking about me in that past life or whatever. It's weird." I felt like he was always comparing me to some other person, even if it was supposed to be me.
"Alright, I'm sorry. I know it makes you uncomfortable, I'll stop. We can just…" He sighed and ran a hand through his hair, "we can just start over."
I let out an empty laugh, "yeah, because claiming we were lovers from another life isn't such a good way to break the ice."
He looks at me sheepishly and smiles.
Over the next few weeks, we develop a sort of routine. He may not wait inside the shop while I work, but he's always there when it's time to close up. Everyday he buys us each a cone of sea salt ice cream, and we eat it on our way to the train station. It was getting easier to talk to him, and our conversations flowed smoothly. I felt less hostile towards him and even laughed at some of his lame jokes. I found out a lot about him; he prefers dogs over cats, his favorite color is blue, and he hates cars that are yellow. Every once in a while he would tell a story of some adventure or situation we had in our past lives. He would always start them off cautiously in case I would object to it, but I enjoyed them. I would nod and smile, which would make those eyes of his illuminate.
One day, when I'm paying for my train ticket, I can't find my card. I dig around in my bag, but it was useless.
"Crap, I must have forgotten it at the shop, and I already locked it up for the night!" I groan and hit myself in the head.
The red head laughs and pulls out his wallet. "Don't worry about it Roxy, I got it covered. I expect free ice cream tomorrow though." He said with a wink. He handed the tram employee some money and we passed through the gate. What surprised me slightly was that he followed me onto the train car, just like the first night we met. "I bought two tickets, I wanted to keep you company." He said with a shrug.
My mouth forms an 'o' shape and I take my usual seat by the window. He quietly followed me and took the seat to my left. We sit in silence as the train starts to creep along the tracks. I finger the strap on my bag, something had been bothering me. It's been a month or two since our first encounter, and this man still hasn't told me his name. A little weird for someone who claimed to be your past love, not even telling me your name.
"Um," he looks over to me, a gentle smile gracing his features.
"Yes…?" He teased.
"This might be weird or whatever, but, what's your name? You never told me. Not once this entire time." I said this quietly, I could see something in his eye I couldn't quite identify.
He looked past me, "Roxy, you should already know my name, all those times, the adventures we had…" He looked wistful as he explained.
I shook my head, "You know I don't." I felt my soul grow heavy with grief as I said this to him.
He chuckled sadly. "You always said that you would be the one to remember, and never forget. You're always so stubborn." He reached out and caressed my cheek. I didn't pull away this time. "Said that if anything, it would be you looking for me." I stayed silent, I didn't know what to say, but I felt like crying. His eyes were overflowing with hopelessness; he grabbed my face and pressed our foreheads together. "You have to remember," he whispered. "Remember my name." He choked down a sob in his throat. "Please. Please remember." He closed his eyes. "Please say my name."
"I'm sorry, I…I can't" I squeezed my eyes shut, hot tears running down my face. I couldn't look at him; the sight was just too heart-wrenching. I have caused all of this man's happiness, and misery. I wanted to remember. I wanted to say this wonderful man's name, but...I couldn't. He buried his head into my shoulder and cried, I held onto him tightly, to never let go.