My New Friend
The short, dysfunctional SIR unit trotted down the sidewalk, nursing a chocolate bubblegum milkshake, his master nowhere in sight. The Irken Invader had been hit with a large water balloon and ran, screaming, back to the home base, completely oblivious to the fate of the small robot. As the robot, dressed in a green dog costume, made its way down the street, it tripped several times, then got back up, not a care in the world.
Stopping at the crosswalk, he waited for the lights to change, signifying when it was safe to cross. A young woman, of about nineteen was crossing the street the opposite way, her arms full of groceries and did not see the light change to the bad light. A semi-truck came barreling through the intersection and was moments from hitting the girl, sending her into oblivion. Beneath the hood of the costume, the robot's eyes turned red, as it switched to duty mode. Igniting the rockets in its feet, the robot-dog shot across the intersection, tackling the girl to the sidewalk, sending her groceries back with her as the semi screamed past, startling the girl.
She sat up slowly, grimacing as she touched the back of her head gently, it had bounced on the concrete when she fell to the sidewalk. Blinking slowly, she looked around, seeing the robot in dog's clothing nursing his milkshake once more, not having dropped it, even throughout the chaos. "You...you saved me?" She asked softly, turning olive green eyes to the robot. The robot stopped slurping its milkshake, before turning seemingly vacant eyes to the girl.
"The bad light was on!" The 'doggy' replied in its crazed, little robotic voice.
"Dogs can't talk..." The girl muttered, cocking her head to the side, looking at the little green dog. "Nor are they green. And I'm sure they don't drink milkshakes..."
"Ish my disguise!" The 'dog' replied, before reaching up and unzipping its hood, revealing the adorable robot with large cyan eyes underneath.
The girl began to move, gathering the groceries that had spilled when she hit the ground. The robot moved and picked up one of the boxes, its eyes widening as it read the front of the box, "Tacos!"
"Yeah. Microwavable. Never had those before?" The girl replied, smiling a little, lifting the other bags as she began walking down the street.
The robot followed her down the street, its eyes staring at the box of microwavable goodness, like it was the secret to happiness. "C-can I have them?" The robot asked, looking up at her like she was a god. A god that blessed her followers with tacos. The girl stopped by a bench, setting the grocery bags down and sitting beside them. She reached down, picking up the robot, setting it on the bench beside her.
"Maybe. So, little taco-loving robot-dog...thing, what's your name? If you have one," She asked, intrigued by the completely adorable 'bot.
"GIR!" The robot replied, hugging the box to its chest, licking it occasionally, as if it could taste the taco-y goodness within.
"GIR, huh? Cute name. Does it mean anything?"
"I don't knoooooow!" GIR replied, nuzzling the box of tacos.
"Well, GIR, it's nice to meet you, I'm Jen."
"Hi Jennnnn!" GIR said, his voice fluctuating a little on the end of her name. "Tacoooos are goooood. I like tacoooos! Can I have your tacoooos?"
Jen chuckled a little at him, then nodded. "Sure, why not? I can get some more tomorrow. And you seem to want them more than me right now."
GIR's eyes widened and a big, goofy grin crossed his metallic features and he let off a high-pitched squeal/laugh. Suddenly, a voice from out of nowhere began screaming, "GIR! GET BACK TO THE BASE AT OOOONCE! I AM IN PAAAAAAIN! ATTEND TO MEEEE!" Jen winced, her index finger going to her ear, wiggling around in it a little, as if trying to get the ringing to stop.
"What on earth was that?" She asked, the sound having come from GIR's head.
"That's my masta!" GIR replied, hugging the box of tacos tightly.
"Your master?" Jen asked, cocking her head to the side, a little confused.
"He's trying to take over the world!"
"Take over the world?" Jen chuckled a little.
"Yeah! He sucks at it!" GIR said matter-of-factly, giggling a little as he hopped off the bench, starting in the direction of his house.
"It was nice meeting you, GIR. Thank you for saving me," Jen called after him.
GIR stopped, turning to face Jen, walking back over to her, setting the box of tacos down for a moment then hugging her leg, a sweet smile on his face. "You're my frienddddd..." GIR stated, like it was common knowledge. Jen smiled at the odd, little robot, shaking her head a little at the surreal events that had transpired in the past ten minutes. GIR turned once more, picking up the box of tacos before the rockets in his feet ignited and he was soon shrinking into the distance, leaving a cloud of exhaust in his wake. Jen stood, gathering her groceries, then continued onto her apartment building.
GIR landed in the front yard of his master's base, then walked inside the front door, still hugging the box of tacos. Zim, his master, appeared from beneath the floor, having been in his labs. "Where were you GIR? I get attacked by the large-headed Dib-creature and you disappear?" Zim demanded, shaking his small, Irken fist at the robot in front of him.
"I made a new frienddddd and she gave me tacooooos and I saved her liiiiiiiiiiiife..." GIR replied, going on about his adventure while Zim was gone, hugging his box of tacos tightly, grinning like a mad...robot.
"You had a chance to watch one of the filthy earth monkeys die and you stopped it? Why?" Zim shouted, getting even more annoyed with his robot accomplice.
Before GIR could reply, Zim threw up his hands, in exasperation, as he sighed, "You're becoming more worthless with each endeavor, GIR! Saving a filthy earthinoid for tacos! Worthless!" Zim scoffed, then moved into the kitchen, taking the 'toilet' down to his labs, leaving GIR in the living room, looking down at the box of tacos he hugged.
"She's my frienddddd..." He whispered softly before carrying the box into the kitchen to heat himself up some tacos.
The End