In Trouble
I have used the original book as the starting date for Trixie's adventure in this story. In the Secret of the Old Mansion, published in 1948, Trixie had just turned 13. Thus this story occurs in 1953, when Trixie has just finished high school at the age of 18. It deals with the social morality of the time.
Prologue - Otis Reading
Siting here resting my bones,
This weariness won't leave me a lone,
Ten thousand miles I've roamed,
Just to make this dock my home,
I'm just going to sit on the dock of the bay,
Watching the tide roll away,
Just going to sit on the dock of the bay,
Wasting time.
I left my home in Georgia,
Headed for the Frisco Bay,
I've got nothing to live for,
Looks like nothings going to come my way,
I'm just going to sit on the dock of the bay,
Watching the tide roll away,
Just going to sit on the dock of the bay,
Wasting time.
I can't do what ten thousand people tell me to do,
So I guess I remain the same,
I'm just going to sit on the dock of the bay,
Wasting time.
Chapter One -Sitting on the Dock of the Bay
Wednesday 25th August 1953
Otis Reading wouldn't leave Trixie's head. The song, actually the words to the second verse played over and over in her mind like a record player suck on the same track. Quietly, she hummed the tune, trying to make sense of the sentiment. Somehow it seemed appropriate to her current situation. Alter all she was siting on the dock outside the boatshed by the Wheelers Lake, watching the still water in the late afternoon sun. And she was procrastinating. Yesterdays revelations meant she would be leaving home soon but not for the reason she intended.
Trixie knew what she had to do with the information she gained only a few sleepless hours previously. However knowing didn't give her the courage to do what she knew she must. Already Trixie had held her startling revelations to herself overnight when she should have gone to the people she loved for support and advice. For the first time in her eighteen years, Trixie had lost her spunk. She was afraid, no terrified because she had finally solved a mystery and wished she had never happened upon it. This time there was no action she could take to resolve the incessant workings of her mind.
How am I going to tell everyone I'm not going to college as they expected me to do? What will they say when I tell them I no longer have the desire to be a dective? How will the other Bob White's react to this? Will they even believe me? Trixie wondered, still finding it hard to encompass the truths she had suddenly discovered such a short time ago. I never thought this would happen to me. I never though life could become so complicated doing something I love. Will I be forced to give it all up? Do I really want too? And what if my family and friends don't or won't support my decision?
Worrying her lower lip was the only outward sign of Trixie's inner agitation although her mind continued to spin at a million miles an hour. As she had in the past, her attention was completely focused on the problem at hand.
A shadow covered her still form making Trix shiver in her bathing suit. Wet material against her cooling skin was simply not a priority until she could find a solution to her current problem. Trixie didn't have to look up to know who had disturbed her silent contemplation. She felt rather than saw the tall red haired man lowered his wiry frame to sit beside to her. Still dressed in town clothes, he had seen Trixie sitting on the edge of the lake, staring into the distance as he and his father had been chauffeured up the long drive to Manor House. Curled in a ball, Trixie's arms were wrapped around her legs with her chin wresting on top. Her posture alone communicated her disquiet. The moment he had seen her sitting there, so alone and untouchable, Jim knew he had to go to her.
Matthew Wheeler turned piercing green eyes on his son as the younger man asked their driver to stop and climbed out of the car without explanation. Jim ignored his father's unasked questions. Closer now, he towered over her inert form. Finally, Trixie turned her head to look up at him. Jim realised her eyes were troubled and her posture was protective.
'What's wrong Trix?' He asked, reaching out to comfort her as best he could. Draping his arm over her shoulders, a long sigh escaped Trixie's lips. He watched as she changed position. Shuffling closer to him, Trix laid her head on his shoulder but retained her guarded pose. Jim knew that obstinate look, he and the other bob whites had seen it often enough when Trixie was contemplating one of her mysteries. He would wait until she felt comfortable because Trixie wouldn't tell what was on her mind until she was ready.
'I'm in trouble Jim.' She whispered in his ear after several minutes of internal struggle.
Unsure why she has chosen these words to tell Jim about her crumbling world, Trix waited impatiently for his response. Trixie knew he understood when his body stiffened. It was the one reaction Trixie most feared. Yet the one reaction she knew Jim would make as his mind assimilated the news. Swallowing her disappointment Trixie attempted to move away, only to be trapped by Jim's strong grip.
Cursing himself, Jim tried to relax as he turned his green gaze on the girl at his side. He didn't have to stare long, her blue eyes told him all he needed to know. Neither knew how to break the sudden silence which had developed between them.
'Go into the boatshed and get dressed Trix.' He commented in a soft voice some minutes later, his head still buzzing with the implication of Trixie's short phrase. Yet his protective instincts told him he would need to step carefully. Trixie was incredibly fragile at this present moment in time and he was her only protection. 'I need a moment to think about this.'
Trixie nodded and scrambled to her feet. Taking one last, long look at Jim, his feet dangling over the dock, his green eyes focused on the lakes distant shore, he didn't seem as disturbed as she though he would be. A smile touched the corners of his mouth and Trixie felt elated. Did he feel as delighted about this as she did? Just as suddenly his lips moved into a frown and he shook his head as though to clear it. Like his moment of stiffness, Trixie wondered what it meant. Unable to bear any more, Trixie did as she was bid before the tears started to stream down her face.
Well, you play with fire you're sure to get burnt, Jim though as the start of a smile threatened to break out on his face. Facing up to the fire is going to be another story altogether and I bet we will all feel a little burnt in the aftermath. The implications of Trixie's statement, of what it would mean for the both of them assaulted his mind. Still the hint of a smile lingered on his lips. I knew this could happen and I guess I'm not really surprised. After all we are young, both still so naïve if a little less innocent. Dad tried to warn me, I just didn't want to listen. Mother kept telling me it was the good kids who often get caught. I guess I didn't realise she knew what we were doing and didn't appreciate her meaning until now. But this will work, Jim promised himself, I'll make it work, if that's what Trixie wants. A frown covered his features, as he began to consider how Trixie must been feeling. Even if it's not what Trixie wants, we still have to make it work somehow.
Shaking his head, Jim remembered Trixie's frightened look which had turned trusting when he asked a silent question. I won't let her down, not the way I feel about her. Jim promised himself, knowing exactly what his next actions must be. The smile which threatened before returned. This time there was a slight sadness touching his lips and tightening his expression into determination.
When Trixie finally collected the courage to step out of the boat shed, Jim was waiting for her. Neither would remember who made the first move. Perhaps it was Trixie who flung herself desperately into Jim's out stretched arms hoping for restitution. Perhaps Jim opened his arms in a gesture of acceptance which Trixie acknowledge whole heartedly. Perhaps the truth was somewhere in between. What they would remember in the future was their need of each other at the moment when their young lives were about to change forever.
'We will make this work.' Jim promised in a determined whispered, tightening his grip on her. Clinging to him, Jim buried his head in Trixie's shoulder and crushed her with the intensity of his embrace.
A second later he was holding her slightly away from him. Searching the depths of Trixie's eyes for understanding, Jim had to be sure he had seen compliance in those china blue orbs. Attempting establish agreement between them without the aid of words, Jim was testing Trixie's determination and resolve. Tears welling in Trixie's eyes told him, she had come to the same conclusions. They had only one socially acceptable option under the circumstances.
'Some folks may think we are in trouble, Trix.' He stated, a sad smile covering his face. 'I don't believe we are.'
'How can you say that Jim?' Trixie asked, astounded at the slight smirk curling the corners of his lips.
'Because it's the way I feel.' To demonstrate his emotions, Jim drew her closer. Letting his intent show, he hesitated, allowing passion the felt for her build. There had always been deep and abiding feeling between them. Once they unleashed it, Jim found himself overwhelmed by the excitement Trixie managed to stir in him. When he could no longer stand to be so far away from her, he lowered his head and moulded Trixie's body to his own. Brushing his lips across her mouth only drove him crazy. He felt sensitised as he never had before. A renewing energy filled him yet he knew he needed to take this slowly, gently so as not to frighten Trixie with the depth of his new found passion. His current level of emotion could only be attributed to their predicament. Passion filled his kiss when he finally nibbled at her lips. Taking his time, he coxed her mouth open. When Trixie returned his caress, when she demanded more, Jim slowed their intimacy and began to pull away.
'Enough for now Trix.' He panted, keeping her body encircled by his strong arms and fighting his own instincts to continue what they had started. 'Come up to the house while I speak to Dad.'
'I guess…' Trixie swallowed hard, unable to look Jim in the eye. She felt ashamed and relieved at the same. Relieved because Jim was going to shoulder the responsibility for her troubles and ashamed because she felt such relief. Yet Trixie knew she wasn't strong enough to cope with recriminations at this moment. She had too many of her own encircling her mind, creating a vortex of insecurity and uncertainty. 'I guess we need to talk to Dad and Moms too.'
'Yes Trix,' Jim agreed, lifting her chin and forcing her gaze to his. 'WE need too.' He reinforced, correctly interpreting the sadness in her eyes.
'Oh, Jim.' Was all Trixie managed to get out before she dissolved in to a puddle of tears. 'Just hold me for a while. I need you so much now.' She sobbed against his chest.
Tightening his hold on her, Jim whispered in her ear. 'And I need you Trix. Remember we need to be here for each other. We will get through this, I promise. We will get through this together.'
Walking hand in hand in the light of a slowly sinking sun, Jim led Trixie toward Manor House. Each step was an effort for Trixie, who could only imagine the reception she would receive from Matthew and Madeleine Wheeler when they heard the news.
Will Mr and Mrs Wheeler ever speak to me again and if they do will they think very differently of me? Will I ever be truly accepted into this house after what I have done?
'Let me go in and talk to Dad first.' Jim couldn't help but notice Trixie's increasing trepidation as they neared his home. His honourable nature was at war with his knowledge of his father's famous temper. Subjecting Trixie to Matthew's enraged tongue would only frighten her further and maybe damage their fledgling relationship. To say he felt anxious at what he needed to achieve was an understatement. Yet Jim knew it was his duty and only the first step of many he would need to take today. He needed to be strong. Strong for Trixie, strong before his father's wrath but, most of all Jim needed to be strong to achieve peace within himself.
'Sit out here on the glider.' Jim pushed Trixie into the swing before she could argue. Silencing the words he saw gathering in Trix's eyes with a brief kiss on the top of her head, Jim turned a serious green gaze on her. 'I promise we will get through this Trix. I think talking to Dad first will be the most difficult step and I need to do it alone. He needs to hear this from me. Especially if he losses his red haired temper. I'm going to need all of my concentration and attention focused on keeping my own emotions under control. Right now you are frightened and afraid and more of a liability in your fragile state.'
'Jim?' Trixie was torn between wanting to be miles away and supporting Jim when he announced their troubles to his father. Feeling cowardly for the sudden relief washing over her after an almost sleepless night and emotionally heart wrenching day, Trixie could only nod her acquiescence while attempting to once again hold back her tears. 'It's just I wanted…'
'I know Trix. I understand but you can't fix all the worlds problems by yourself.' Squeezing her hand, Jim continued with a weak smile. 'Stay right here Trix, no matter how much shouting you hear.' His lips curling into a crooked grin, Jim kissed the top of her head once again. 'Dad may not like the situation but he will support us. I'll come and get you when he's had a chance to think it though and see it from our side.' Seeing she was about to interrupt him, Jim covered Trixie's lips with a finger. 'Save you strength for the battles you need to fight Trix. We still have to face your parents tonight. I need you to be strong then, for me.'
Nodding her agreement, Trixie watched Jim disappear through the front door and wondered for the tenth time in as many seconds if she had made the right decision in allowing Jim to face his father alone. She felt like a coward and yet was relieved to have this battle fought for her.
Jim's right, Trixie realised with a flash of insight, I have to save my strength for the battles that lay ahead. The battles where Jim will need my support and love to overcome his own insecurities and the objections of his closest friends.
'Dad?' Jim knocked at the same time he opened the door to his adoptive father's study.
'To what do I owe the pleasure?' Matthew Wheeler's instincts had been on high alert since noticing his daughter's best friend moping by the lake not an hour earlier.
He wasn't unaware of the developing relationship between his son and Trixie Belden. It had been developing for five years. Ever since the day his daughter and Trixie had found Jim as a half staved runaway at the old Frayne Mansion. The relationship had been cemented when Trixie lead his once shy and lonely daughter halfway across New York state looking for the heir to the Frayne fortune. The girl's success in finding him seemed to predestine this very moment. One Matthew Wheeler both regretted and hoped for, all be it at some time in the distant future.
This summer had brought Jim home from College at the conclusion of his third year of Law. It had also brought his friendship with Trixie to a climax. She was now eighteen and no longer merely the girl next door. Some evidence of the tomboy she had once been still remained. Matthew had been quick to see the appreciation in Jim's eyes at her new found maturity. His son saw this emerging young woman as a possible life long companion. Jim hadn't hesitated to show his interest by accompanying Trixie Belden to her Senior School Dance. They had been almost inseparable since that night. Neither the Belden's nor the Wheeler's had been successful in slowing the pace of their growing attachment.
But this is different. Matthew read the serious intention in his son's body language. I know why you are here James Winthrop Frayne and wished I didn't. It means you relationship has progressed much further and faster than I thought.
'I don't think you will find any pleasure in what I have to tell you.' Jim stated as he stood stock still in front of Matthew's desk. His face carefully schooled, waiting his father's reaction.
'I won't pretend not to understand Jim.' A deep frown covered the older man's features. His green eyes never left his son, weighing up each reaction his words brought. 'Nor will I pretend to be completely happy.'
Matthew's famous temper had been extinguished as he watched the interaction between Trixie and Jim by his lake. I may not have heard the words but I saw their body language and it told its own story. Only one circumstance could have Trixie Belden worried enough to apprehensively wait for Jim's return from New York. And now my son has just confirmed my worst suspicions.
Matthew sighed to himself as he quietly realised, I do believe I secretly expected this development.
'How do you feel about this Jim?' Matthew's piercing eyes locked onto those of his son in the hope he would see a flicker of emotion which would betray Jim's true feelings.
'Not unhappy.' A silly grin enveloped Jim's face as he finally admitted his clandestine pleasure at Trixie unexpected news. Realisation and understanding of his new situation had finally permeated Jim's conscious mind. He refused to buckle to social pressure and pretend to be soberly unhappy when he was openly delighted. Under Matthew's continuing scrutiny, he was forced to add. 'I have to admit this was always my goal. I think Trix assumed and I knew it was always going to happen one day. Now it will be sooner than I had anticipated because this event has forced my hand.'
Nodding at the completely honest answer, Matthew would never admit to being taken by surprise. 'Does Trixie know that?'
'Not yet.' Jim had the tenacity to look slightly embarrassed. 'She wouldn't believe me right now, not under the circumstances. But I intend to show her every day how much she means to me.'
By god, the sudden thought occurring to Matthew showed on his face, I have to ask. I have to know the lengths my son would go to, to get what he wants.
'Jim, did you plan this? Did you deliberately set out to…' Matthew couldn't continue his thoughts. Jim's reaction when he seized his father's meaning was immediate and explosive.
Sudden white hot anger infused into Jim's stance. He couldn't believe his father had asked him such a question. Working hard to keep his voice level and his famous temper under control, Matthew saw the danger in his son's eyes and couldn't help but smile at his reaction. It gave him the answer he wanted before Jim could say a word. And he was glad.
'No.' His anger subsided as suddenly as it had been generated. 'Well not intentionally.' He admitted somewhat embarrassed now his initial reaction had passed and he was able to consider the question logically.
Nodding into the silence, Matthew asked aloud, 'What do you intend to do?'
'What I need to.' He answered defensively, still reeling from his father's comments. 'I wanted to tell you first. Then Trixie and I will need to talk to Mr and Mrs Belden tonight. Arrangements need to be made in the next week or so.' Jim kept his tone level as his mind catalogued and sorted his still jumbled thoughts. In the back of Jim's mind he wondered if his reaction completely honest. Maybe they hadn't be a carefully as they might because Jim knew he could support himself and Trixie if the need arose. 'I will need access to some of the interest generated from my inheritance to finish college and build a home on Ten Aces. I was hoping we could rent the apartment you brought three years ago in Boston until I finish at Harvard next summer. Then we will move back to Sleepyside if the job offer with your New York office is still available. That way Trixie can be close to her family and friends when she needs them.'
'You seem to have it all sorted out.' Matthew commented still eyeing his son. Especially for a young man who only learnt his girl is in trouble this afternoon. It's almost as if you planned this Jim, subconsciously. 'What does Trixie think? I understood she was anxious to start college in the fall with Honey and Dianna.'
Neither of the men had seen the woman in question timidly creep down the corridor. Each minute she had been left with her own thoughts seemed like an hour to Trixie. Biting her lip, she had listened for rased voices from the direction of Matthew Wheelers office. Hearing nothing, Trixie's apprehension had increased until her curiosity got the better of her. She just had to know what was going on. Trixie needed to know what Jim was telling his father. She also felt guilty forcing him to face his father's wrath alone.
'Jim?' She questioned half hidden by the heavy door which had been left ajar.
With Matthew sitting and Jim standing on opposite side of the carved wooden desk, it appeared to Trixie as though they were engaged in a pleasant familiar discussion. Neither wore the angry or conciliatory expressions Trixie anticipated. Hearing only Matthew's last comment confused Trixie.
Has Jim told him yet? Trix wondered. Have I interrupted before Jim's had the chance to speak to his father? Have I ruined everything?
'Come in Trixie.' Matthew invited casually, his bodies posture at odds with his calm invitation. His tone may have been level at the hesitant expression on Trixie's face, inwardly, however he was sardonically smiling at her uncharacteristic behaviour. So this is what it takes to make the egmatic Trixie Belden self conscious and very unsure of herself, he thought. 'Jim and I were just discussing your future.'
'Jim?' Trixie once again looked to him for support, as though a single gaze would communicate what he expected of her.
Standing in the Wheeler's opulent house made her feel uncomfortable for the first time in her memory. Unsure of the conversation before her arrival, Trixie looked to Jim to for direction.
What am I suppose to do? She silently pleaded with her blue eyes.
This event, Trix suddenly realised, will change every aspect of my life. My expectations for myself have changed just as other peoples expectation of me will change. What dose Jim expect of me? What will the Wheeler's expect of me? What will my parents expect of me?
As if he read her mind, Jim reached for her. Without hesitation, Trixie flew into his embrace, knowing she would find strength, love and devotion there. She forgot about Matthew Wheeler sitting not ten feet from them as Jim's hold turned intimate. And then he bent his head and kissed the curly locks on her crown. The gesture, Trixie was becoming to understand, signalled Jim's need for emotional support when he was feeling vulnerable and torn between unenviable choices.
He's not as stoic as people believe. Trixie realised. Jim is able to hide his emotions, making people think he is composed, when really he's emotionally confused or in turmoil creating self doubt. And yet I complete him, I make up for his weaknesses with my strengths, as he dose for me. I can offer him the same strength, love and devotion he gives me when I am in need.
For the first time, Trixie Belden truly understood the bond they had forged and how much difference it would make to the outcome of this unexpected mystery.
'Is Dad right Trix?' Jim asked gently, his eyes searching for her answer. 'Are you looking forward to college in the fall?'
'I want to be with you.' Trixie whispered into the front of his shirt. 'If I can enrol in college in Boston for a semester I will. If not…' Trixie shrugged, realising this part of her life could wait. For now there were more important considerations than her further education.
'There is no reason why Trix couldn't complete next semester and finish her degree part-time if she wanted to.' Jim boldly told his father, not wanting to hold her college experience to ransom. Yet he was wondering how much his special girl's life was about to change and consequently his own in the next year.
Chapter Two – Feeling Out of Sorts
Thursday 18th July 1963
Trixie Frayne was grumpy. I feel funny. Light headed and achy, as though I have the flu again. Perhaps I should make an appointment to see young Dr Ferris. This has gone on long enough. She thought to herself, wondering where she would find the time with three young and energetic children currently home from school for the long summer break. Not to mention an absent husband who was taking on more responsibility at work. Matthew Wheeler was grooming Jim to take over the reigns of the family company since his daughter showed no interest in business. Jim was thriving with the challenge while his wife was wilting a little more every day from the increased domestic responsibilities.
'But Mommy!' Six year old Katie Frayne wailed, breaking into Trixie's private revere, returning the conversation to its earlier topic. 'Uncle Regan is teaching Jamie and Davie to ride.' Stomping her mini sized foot on the wooden kitchen floor, a mutinous look covered the little girls face. It competed with several smudges from the garden where Trixie had unsuccessfully attempted to divert her daughter's attention since her brother's departure earlier in the day.
Trixie forced herself to stop smiling at her daughters' antics. She recalled so many similar situations in her younger years when Brian and Mart had been doing boy things without her. I complained just a loudly at my own Mother for the same reason. Oh how time repeats itself, she struggled to hide her amusement under a stoic expression.
'It's not fair, I want to ride too.' Katie continued when she thought her mother was ignoring her plea. This time her voice took on a slightly wheedling tone. 'I want to go to Granddaddy Wheelers right now and learn. The boys are always doing everything without me and you let them.' Once again the little foot hit the floor. 'It's all because I'm only a girl.'
'Katie.' Taking in a calming breath, Trixie wondered how her headstrong daughter could look so much like Jim and yet be as determined as she had been at the same age. 'Uncle Regan promised to begin teaching all three of you to ride on the weekend. The boys are up at Manor House helping Uncle Regan muck out the stables and get ready for the new ponies. Your granddaddy brought three ponies so you could all learn to ride, together. You will just have to wait until Saturday morning when your daddy and I take you to the big house along with your brothers. Unless you want to help the boys move horse manure and hay.' Pausing to watch the horrified expression cross her youngest Childs face, Trixie was force to giggle inwardly at Katie's reaction to the dirty job. 'Besides, your cousins are coming with Aunty Honey this afternoon and I expect you to help me entertain our guests.'
'Are they staying with Granddaddy Wheeler or Granddaddy Belden?' Katie frowned, not remembering this piece of information. Her pale face pinched in a disgusted look as the implications of her Mothers request finally sunk in. 'Maddy is two whole years younger than me.' Katie wailed, a scowl covering her features at the thought. 'She likes playing dress ups with dolls. I hate dress ups and I hate dolls. And Matthew is just a baby. He can't even talk!'
While you, like your Mother at the same age, like chasing your brother's around the country side and getting into the same mischief as they do. Trixie Frayne, your husband is always telling you the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Where our daughter is concerned, Jim is right. Shaking her head, Trixie looked down at her red haired, green eyed child and was thankful she hadn't received Jim's freckles and temper. Although she has my temperament and that is hard enough to deal with at the moment.
'First of all Katie Helen Frayne, I don't want you stamping your foot in temper.' Trixie's expression turned serious as she chastised her youngest child. Instantly Katie's eyes became large and round. Her mother rarely used that tone of voice with her. She was instantly contrite. Trixie knew it wouldn't last long. 'And yes,' She immediately softened, 'Aunty Honey, Uncle Brian and your cousins are staying at Manor House because they are moving back to Sleepyside and their new house isn't ready. Daddy told you last week that Uncle Brian is going to be the new doctor at the hospital and live in town. Lastly Aunty Honey will be here with your brothers very soon. I expect you to play with Maddy this afternoon nicely.' Trixie remonstrated. 'You may have to compromise Katie and find something you and Maddy both like to play.'
'All right.' The mutinous look was back. Katie added under her breath as she scrambled out of the kitchen before she her mother could ask her to help prepare lunch, 'but only because I have too!'
'Trix, you don't look yourself.' Honey glance at her friend of fifteen years for the hundredth time in two hours. This time she was determined to say what was on her mind. Both her mother and mother in law had expressed concern over Trixie's health in the last week. Now Honey understood their apprehension. The change in her best friend over the last two months was astounding. Dark smudges pooled beneath both of Trixie's eyes and she seemed utterly exhausted. Added to that, Trixie had picked at the food on her plate over lunch which was unusual for her healthy, active friend. The last time they had met in New York, Honey had felt decidedly frumpy beside her slender, fit sister in law as she was still overcoming the birth of her second child. Honey missed her usually exuberant friend's happy banter as even conversation appeared to drain her limited reserves of strength. 'Is something going on between you and Jim I should know about.'
'You mean apart from the fact my husband leaves the house before six most mornings and doesn't return home until after eight? Or the fact that he misses his children getting up and going to bed every night of the week.' Trixie grinned at her friend but the true strain of running a large almost self-sufficient house hold could be heard in her voice. If I could only shake off this persistent virus, everything would go back to normal, I know it, Trixie told herself. 'Actually Honey it's not as bad as that. Jim spends as much time with the kids on the weekend as he can. He assures me the hours he is currently putting in with your father will stop soon. I couldn't have asked for a more supportive husband and father. Besides with Brian continually studying to become a paediatric consultant for the last decade, you would be one of the few people who understand.'
'Believe me I do!' Exclaimed Honey, remembering many a night when her tired husband would just get to bed, only to be called out and she would have to cope with a new baby on her own. Those residency days were well behind them now Dr Brian Belden was a consultant. 'So if you and Jim aren't having problems, then why do you look like…' Words failed the usually diplomatic woman.
Honey was greeted with the sound of Trixie's laughter and it warmed her heart to see some colour infusing into pale cheeks. 'Its OK Honey, you can tell me I look like death warmed over several time.' Turning serious, Trixie's attention was captured by the empty coffee cup in her hand. 'I don't really know what the problem is.'
'Then why you are so tired, Trix? Is it because Jim's not around to shoulder some of the responsibility?' Honey refused to let the subject drop entirely. Intuition and being a doctor's wife told her there was more to this story than her sister in law was letting on. 'I can understand you being run down but Moms said you hadn't been yourself lately.'
'Do you know you're beginning to sound like Brian?' Trixie teased.
'You didn't answer my question.' Honey reminded, not willing to let the subject be changed.
'Would you mind looking after my brood one day next week, so I could go and see Dr Ferris in peace?' The pleading look in Trixie's eyes begged Honey not to continue with her questions because Trixie was just as puzzled by her lack of vigore as those who cared about her. And it was worrying her more than she let on.
'Why don't you call his office now and see if you can get an appointment this afternoon, before the weekend.' Honey suggested. 'If you slip away now I could stay with the children and they wouldn't even know you had gone. Besides neither of our husbands will be home before supper so we could meet up in town this evening.'
'Thanks Honey.' Hugging her best friend and thanking her for her silent support, Trixie reached for the phone and dialled the number.
Friday 19th July 1963
'Where are Jamie and Davie, Katie?' Unable to hear her boys, Trixie started to worry. She didn't have the energy to go chasing after nine year old James and seven year old David. In fact today she didn't have the energy for anything.
Trixie didn't feel well enough too get dinner preparations underway for her family and wondered how Jim and the children would respond to burgers at Whimpies. Her fatigue was both physical and mental since her appointment with Dr Ferris yesterday afternoon. He had ordered several blood tests, unsure and unwilling to comment on cause of her current medical condition. His inability to diagnose a simple flu had worried Trixie more than living with the fear that something was wrong. The waiting had caused her a restless night and worried Jim, although he hadn't commented. Feel1ng her disquiet, Jim had held her close all night and waited for Trixie to unburden herself on him. This morning he had called to office and informed his sectary he would be in late. Forcing Trixie to stay in bed after a bout of nausea, Jim had dressed and fed his children before taking them to his Mother in laws home for the day.
'I want you all to come inside and wash up for dinner.' Trixie ordered as her daughter scrambled outside to look for her elder brothers. 'Your daddy's coming home early today.'
At least I hope you do Jim, I really need you here to distract the three little monsters while I try to get some rest or I will never get rid of this feeling of constant exhaustion, Trixie silently prayed to herself. I've been in bed most of the day and yet I feel drained.
The sound of the back door opening and three little sets of feet stomping into the house coincided with the incessant ringing of the telephone. Fearing the voice on the other end, Trixie picked it up gingerly as she watched her three children troop through the back door to the laundry sink.
'Frayne House.' She almost whispered.
'Mrs Frayne?' A pleasant voice asked.
'Yes.' The answer was little more than a croak yet Trixie knew she had to get a hold of herself before her children entered the kitchen and heard this one sided conversation. Clearing her throat, Trixie attempted to concentrate on the voice telling her to hold for Dr Ferris.
'Trixie?' The young medic's amused tone permeated her frozen brain. 'I have some very good news for you.' He paused, sensing his patient needed time to absorb his information. 'I have just received your blood results from the laboratory in White Plains and can definitely give you the reason for your fatigue and nausea over the last month.' Without further fuss, young Dr Ferris read out her result and explained the implications to his nervous patient. 'How do you feel about this Trixie?' He asked with concern when she had remained silent for several seconds.
'Relieved and stupid.' Letting out the breath Trixie didn't realise she had been holding, a silly smile covered her face. Crushing the phone between her neck and head, Trixie covered her stomach with both hands, still unable to believe what the doctor had told her. 'I don't know why I didn't pick it up myself.' She berated. 'After all its not like I haven't been through this before.'
Laughing at her tone, the doctor said. 'You wouldn't be the first and I sure you won't be the last. Anyone with three children could miss the signs. Especially when coping with said children on school vacation and you spending all your time and energy looking after them. I'll transfer you back to my assistant and she will make another appointment for you in two weeks. Take care of yourself until then and try to get some rest.'
'I will try.' Trixie promised, her mind still reeling. Feeling both relieved and nervous at the same time, Trixie wondered how she would break her news to Jim and the rest of her family. Well at least I know and that is one worry off my mind. Jim, how on earth are you going to react to this.
'Mom, are you k?' Jamie looked troubled. He had been watching his mother for several seconds and wasn't sure he liked the way she was talking on the phone. 'I think you need to sit down. You look kind of funny, like a ghost, all white.'
Smiling at her eldest child, Trixie constantly wondered at his analytical, enquiring mind. James Winthrop Frayne III possessed the same steel trap mind his father did. 'Honey, Mommy is great.' Kneeing down she hugged her little boy who only accepted the affection because he knew his mother needed the contact. Pulling away at the earliest moment, Trixie's smile deepened. 'I love you so much Jamie.'
'Do you love me too?' Davie's bottom lip stuck out.
He ran to into his mothers open arms when she nodded. 'Yes I love you too Davie.' Trixie kissed the top of his gold and red head. 'Did Katie tell you we are all going out to Whimpies for burgers tonight.'
'Really!' David Winthrop Frayne II shouted at the top of his lungs and did a little dance in the middle of the kitchen floor. 'Is daddy coming too. Mommy I want daddy to come too!'
'Daddy's coming too.' Jim's calm voice issued from the porch door. Holding his daughter in his arms, his eyes captured Trixie's in an assessing gaze. 'We will talk later.' He mouth above the heads of his children as they ran to greet him. Putting Katie on the floor, Jim managed to bear hung all three little bodies at once.
'Do you love us too daddy?' Katie asked, sounding confused.
'Yes Katie, daddy loves all his family with all his heart.' Once again Jim's troubled eyes reached out for those of his wife.
Saturday 19th July 1963
''What's up Trix?' Jim asked after kissing his wife and noticing her flushed cheeks on pale skin. 'You look unhappy and bothered.'
'Your daughter!' Exclaimed Trixie as she threw her hands in the air at her youngests antics. Once again she had wheedled her way into a riding lesion with her brothers when she was suppose to play with Joan Heathfield's daughters. The Heathfield's had brought acreage on Glen Road close to the Albany Post Road and had two girls about Katie's age.
'She's half yours too.' Jim commented, a smile covering his face. Of all their children, Katie Helen Frayne was the most likely to upset her mother with her impetuous nature and sprit of adventure. Mostly because my wife and daughter are far to much alike for there own good, Jim chuckled to himself.
'Prove it.' Eyeing her husband wirily, Trixie continued. 'She looks just like you with all that curly red hair and bright green eyes.' As though that were proof enough.
'True.' He confessed. 'But I think I must remind you that Katie acts just like you at the same age or so my mother in law continues to remind me. My boys, now they take after their father, being honourable, level headed…'
'Those boys are defiantly mine!' Trixie interrupted, a mock scowl covering her features. 'You only need to look at a photo of Mart at the same age to see the resemblance.'
'David's hair is more my colour than Marts.' Protested Jim, wondering why they were arguing about their children, all be it in fun, when they finally had the day to themselves. 'And James the 3rd has almost green eyes just like his dad.'
Confused, Jim pulled slightly away from Trixie. Able to look at her with more objective eyes, Jim didn't like what he saw. She looked exhausted and run down.
'Alright, you win as usual.' Defeated, Trixie sighed, seeing a twinkle of mischief light her husbands eyes disappear in a flash. 'Our children all carry part Belden and Frayne. Happy now?' She attempted to distract him.
Laughing half heartedly, Jim kissed his wife again. This time solidly on the lips and captured her in his arms refusing to let her go.
'Not nearly!' He had wanted to continue kissing her, yet there was something Trixie was withholding from him. After years of marriage, Jim knew when his wife had something important on her mind. She had been covering it up for months now. Last night something essential had changed and Trixie had been pensive all through the family dinner at Whimpies. Feeling she needed time to herself to work through the problem, Jim respected her silence. This morning he had tried to give her some space. Coming home from walking his children to the Manor House Stables for their first riding lesion had given him time to think. And now you are going to tell me what is going on in that head of yours Trixie Frayne because I am tired of worrying about you and the state of your health. 'How are you feeling? You seem out of sorts. Has that flu faired up again?' The worry in his expression was mirrored in his voice.
To say his wife's bouts of sickness over the last few months had worried him was an understatement. At first he had believed Trixie's excuse of her increased responsibilities now he was working such long hours. That explanation had long ago ceased to relieve his mind of anxiety for her health.
'I went to see the doctor on Thursday.' Trixie was glad of the introduction Jim had give her. She didn't quite know how to tell him what the problem was.
'And?' The word was loaded. After almost ten years of marriage to Trixie, he knew when she had bad news. A shiver rand the length of his body.
'Oh Jim.' She reached out to him and he took her in his arms, holing her tight in anticipation. Trixie's actions frightened him.
'Just tell me Trix.' He soothed. 'What ever it is, we will cope with it,'
'I'm in trouble again!' She shuddered, waiting for Jim to stiffen in response to her words as he had so many years ago at the lake.
'Is that all?' Relieved by the news, he held his wife at arms length, scanning her face for her reaction to this pregnancy. 'Don't you want this baby Trixie?'
'Yes, but the night Katie was born, you said we should learn how babies where made.' Trixie almost wailed before drawing Jim closer and wrapping her arms around his waist. She needed his support and love now more than ever. This pregnancy was already proving to be more difficult than her first three. 'You said it was time to stop producing any more little Frayne's.'
'Trixie!' He scolded, remembering the conversation to which she referred. 'You hand only just turned twenty-two and already we had three children under the age of three. I though that was enough for you to cope with at the time.'
Conclusion – How Time Repeats Itself
Tuesday 29th March 1969
Helen Belden sat in a rocking chair her son-in-law had made especially for her last year when she had come to live with Trixie and Jim Frayne and their four children. Peter had suffered a stroke early the year before and passed away a few days later. Mart Belden and his lovely wife, Dianna now lived at Crabapple Farm, in the hollow between the Fraynes Ten Acres property and Dr Brian Belden's family situated at Manor House on the opposite hill.
How could I have become so lucky, Helen thought, only Peter's sudden death has caused a shadow on my perfect world. Still I have Trixie and her children underfoot every day and never a board moment. If I become complacent there are my son's wifes and their young families within easy walking distance. I have always wanted to paint this country and now I have the time since Jim rebuilt the Summer house as my studio. Life is almost perfect.
Bobby, or Robert Belden as he now prefered to be called, had anounced the production of his first child with his wife Irene last month. They lived in Croton surrounded by Birch-in-laws who were eagerly awaiting the frist grandchild. It's not far to travel, Helen reminded herself whimsically as the picture her daughter and granddaughter made suddenly evoked an old memory.
'Oh, Mom,' Katie moaned, running her hands through her short, red curls. 'I'll just die if I don't have a horse.'
Trixie looked up from weeding a row of plants in the fenced in vegetable garden. 'Katie,' she said, trying to look stern. 'If you died as many times as you thought you were going to, you'd have to be a cat with nine lives to be with us for one day.'
'I don't care!' Tears of indignation welled up in Katie's eyes round green eyes. 'With James and David at camp this summer, I'll die of boredom. I mean it Mom.'
'Trixie!' Helen Belden couldn't keep the laughter out of her voice as she remembered a similar conversation with her thirteen year old daughter many years in the past. 'Cast your mind back 22 summers,' she teased, enjoying the humour not yet apparent to her 35 year old daughter.
Not waiting for a responce from her only daughter, Helen watched six year old Peter Frayne charge out of the house. 'I seem to recall a young woman complaining of much the same problem before Honey Wheeler moved to town and she had a season, or several of mischieve. Not to mention two older brothers away at camp and a younger sibling underfoot.'
'Don't remind me!' Trixie grined up at her mother. 'Jim is constantly telling me how time repeats its self.'
'What dose Granny mean Mom,' Katie asked perplexed.
'Your grandmother was just reminding me of a summer when I was your age, Katie and I felt much the same as you do now. Uncle Mart and Brian were away at camp. They just happened to be the same age as James and David, sixteen and fourteen. Back then Uncle Robert was only six years old, the same age as Peter is now.' Grining at the memories, Trixie hoped her children wouldn't get into as many mysterious adventures as she had lead the Bob White's into. Or give me the grey hairs I gave my Mother!
Getting up from her rocking chair, Helen found it hard not to see the humour in the situation. 'If time repeats itself in the next generation, it won't be long before your daughter is in trouble.' A deep chuckle escaped Helen's control. There was more than one meaning to her comment. She knew the moment Trixie understood her sentament by the horrified look on her daughters features.
'I think Jim and I just decided to ground Katie until she turns 21,' Trixie's eyes followed her mothers retreating figure all the way to the summer house. Unlike Helen, Trixie didn't see the funny side of it, not even if she suddenly realised her Mother had only been 20 when Brian entered the world. And married only seven months! At least both our marriages turned out to be happy and long even if they strated hastily.
'What...what do you mean Mom!' The tears welled in the corners of Katie's eyes.
'Katie, what do you know about boys,' Trixie turned a serious gaze on her developing child. Oh Jim, life never prepared me for this. I think I would prefer our children to become involved in solving mysteries than discovering the secert of the oppostie sex.