titlee: pretender
a/n: FFFFF. feel like this is really crappy (like crappier the my NORMAL stuff so) soobbbb. this was sooo quickly made. just, yeah. but I had desperate block, friend requested something, this is late for the contest. sobbb. hope anyone can enjoy this ;_; for calling superman's contest!
fandom: Pokemon
characters: N.
genre: angst? littlebitsy bit of romance?
rating: K+
pretender
N's spindly fingers grasps Reshiram's white mane harder as they surge through the air, into the weak sunlight and through the wispy blue sky. N pretends he isn't crying (because, because, maybe the water running down his face, he can't feel it, so, it can't be there—right? Right?) and he convinces himself that he is strong. But then he remembers White's pretty face, with the large, ocean-blue eyes she has and the barely controllable hair, and the tears come back up again.
N sometimes (always) wonders if White misses him. Probably not. Maybe. He likes to think she misses him, as Reshiram curves a corner, and then he remembers White has other people. N is alone. White has Cheren and Bianca and Black, and all of them love her.
Nobody loves N. Anthea didn't, Concordia didn't. Ghestis didn't—he veered away from the topic, chasing the father he had loved out of his mind. N found this sad. Whoever he loved (White, for instance) never loved him back.
White has always been strong, with the way her eyes brightened up at challenges, the way her fists coiled up during arguments, the way she could tighten her focus and make sure stray strands didn't fall loose. That's the thing. Its the fact that White is stronger then N. In soul, battling, and feelings. She is stronger.
He wants to believe maybe White is weaker then he thought, but that means N would be admitting he doesn't know White at all, so that wouldn't work. Sometimes (many times) he wonders if White even thinks about him. White doesn't think about people like him though, so probably not. She has too many friends to keep her company to think about the gangly, green-haired boy with the waning smile and awkward words. Because White has Cheren and Bianca and...
But now he is going in circles, so he blinks a few times to ward off any threatening tears away (ignoring the salty streaks of liquid sadness that had already coursed down the smooth skin of his face), and clings harder to Reshiram, pretending that he is the hero and that he and Reshiram will save the world.
They soar over the night sky as cold stars twinkle in mockery. N is still pretending.