Translator's note:
Merry Christmas Fanfiction readers!
This is a little translation from Spanish to English, written by Hermione Weasley 26. Please take note that English is a second language for me and that my English friends are now in holiday vacations, but I HAD TO give you this to read for Christmas, it's so good! Really!
I hope you'll enjoy it as much as I did translating it.
Love,
Eriam
77/12/23
Dearest Lily,
I'm just writing to ask you how you are, how is your health, present and future. I hope it's good and that you're having wonderful holidays with your parents, relatives and friends. Careful with the Christmas turkey, you know what it's said about.
Best wishes,
James
77/12/23
Potter,
Idiot. Since you care, my health was good until I read your letter. If you think that this piece of shit of yours will make me forgive you to fight with Snape while you SWORE me you wouldn't, you are stupidest that I thought you were.
Would you please be so kind to me and drawn you down in your toilet,
Lily Evans
77/12/23
Sirius, mate, it hadn't worked out. Lily's still mad at me. And THIS time, it's YOUR FU FAULT, for I had to go to detention in your place so you wouldn't be in trouble and go out with Cutie-Mimi, Silly-Mimi, so maybe you could do something. All my progress with the red-haired are reduced to nothingness.
James
77/12/23
Hi Alice,
How are your holidays? Guess you've been filling yourself with cookies and cakes, as for me, my entire wardrobe's about to blow up. Eating like an aspirator.
Guess what? Potter wrote me. Do you remember, at school, I had given him 8,7 out of 10 for cuteness? Well, forget that. He actually failed. He's just an idiot. I wish I could never see him again. Do you think he will care that I gained a pair of kilos? God, a talking seal, I tell you.
Salutations from your seal friend, kiss you,
Lily
77/12/24
That's progress! Remember how she was screaming and running away when she was seeing you, while pulling her hair from her head? It's just because you are such a paranoiac, honey. But here come Dr. Sirius Love and he's gonna set everything. I sent Lily a tiny little gift from you that's gonna make the pussycat soften. Grrrrrrr…
With all the love from my lovely heart, Sirius
77/12/24
Hey Lils,
I'm not bad with the turkey mission. Every year's the same; my mother and her sisters are arguing at each other about plums; do we put them with the core, without the core, or do we really use plums or maybe it's date that we usually take… So we end up every year with 3 turkeys on the table and 3 shrews ready to kill those who won't say her one is the best one. I should turn vegetarian, honestly.
I don't think Potter will mind your two kilos. Anyway, even if you would wear a potato bag, shaved your hair and asked for being called "Bertto", he wouldn't mind. But I thought you hated him. Please, guide me, for my mental health.
Peace, love, etc etc… Alice
77/12/24
James,
I'm hiding to write while Sirius is busy taking my mom's Christmas tree ornaments and putting them under his tee shirt so that my aunts can touch to see how hard they are… Seriously, I'm still wondering how come your grandma didn't murder him…
Now, the thing is, I think you should know that Sirius sent Lily a matching underwear kit that's probably fitting in a baby's fist, I mean, a really small baby.
Hope you'll have time to fix things up, avoiding chair coming to your head for the second time from Lily's direction.
Happy Christmas, though. Even if you won't be happy Lily's receiving THIS.
Remus
77/12/24
Sirius
Do you remember me telling you once that my home was your home? Yeah? Then FORGET IT NOW, cause when Lily's gonna open her gift she'll kill me so YOU WON'T HAVE HOME ANYMORE. Oddly, knowing that you're gonna suffer is the only thing that cheers me a little.
You're just an IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT!
James
P.S. IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT…
77/12/24
Lily,
I know that you usually do or believe the opposite of what I say, but please, PLEASE. If you receive a gift from me, don't open it. I didn't send it, it's not from me, it's Sirius.
Since I know you'll open it anyway, I want you to know two things. So if you wanna strangle me, you'll have reasons. First, even if I didn't send the gift, I don't mind if you wanna show me if it fits you well. Second is… Lily! You could avoid wandering in the common room in nightdress? It's not really funny to hear commentaries in the dressing room after.
James
77/12/25
Gift open. Hope you have good dental insurance.
Lily
P.S. I dress up as I wish.
P.S. 1 I hope the Quidditch team dental is good too.
P.S. 2 Happy Christmas.
77/12/25
Happy Christmas!
Jamesie dear, don't you miss me? Of course you do! I don't understand your reaction; Lily will love it for sure! The sex-shop girl told me that it was latest fashion and that the transparent fabric is really comfy!
Remus wants to write something:
It might be not that bad, James. One day, she'll forgive you. Or not. But it's surely not that bad.
So, that's it. Remus' mom waiting for me in the kitchen.
We kiss you lovingly
Sirius
P.S. from Remus: My mom wants to keep him away from the Christmas tree, just in case he had the brilliant idea of using the top angel as something else… Courage and happy Christmas.
Remus
77/12/25
Alice, I hate Potter.
I hate him like we hate pimples, hair that don't want to be straight or chocolate-less cakes. And he's hopeless. You know what he sent me, this git? Barbie size underwear!
I wish that all the James Potter of the Entire World disappeared. By the way, Happy Christmas and thanks for the agenda!
Smacks!
Lily
77/12/26
Hi Lily,
Thank you for the silver quill; it's a really good one.
I don't know what to say, everything sounds weird… well… clearly sounds Black. James is a little corrupted, but he's still having a sense of common courtesy. You should trust him for once… or at least, let him explain the situation before passing on him with a chainsaw…
See you on Friday.
May strength be with you.
Alice.
77/12/27
Pad, Moony,
I'm living the deepest depressing days of my life since two days. The future mother of my 15 children is not talking to me anymore. And that's a major problem considering the fact that it puts in danger de conception of those children.
But there's still reassurance. When we'll be back at Hogwarts, I'll tell everyone Sirius is sleeping every night with his lucky-blanket. That will make me feel better for sure.
Remus, thanks for the broom polisher. I'm quite sure Sirius will appreciate when I'll make him try it by an opening that is not his nose.
Attentively,
James.
77/12/28
I forgive you.
Ha! You believed it. Innocent.
Lily
77/12/28
Alice,
Maybe you're right, but I don't want to check. James is an idiot. Immature. I really don't know how I could have seen him as a "possible", but I was surely under hallucinogen.
Meeting day after tomorrow at 10:30 at King's Cross?
Kiss you
Lily
77/12/29
James,
Hard feelings are bad. Provoke wrinkles. Be happy and present the other cheek when someone hit the first, as greatest philosopher of all times says.
With all my deepest affection,
Sirius
P.S. Keep the blanket away from all this. The poor one is not guilty.
77/12/29
It's over, reddish, enough. But we'll clear up things first. You laugh at me, fine, make a fool of me, fine, punch me, take my worst enemies' sides… but don't you dare, DON'T YOU DARE trying to beat me in my territory, jokes.
Plus… maybe you like playing with my feelings. Cause you clearly know that I'm crazy about you, more than Sirius is crazy about himself, that I kiss the ground where you walk and that nothing makes me happier than the "'Morning James. 'Evening James." you say when you pass by me in the Great Hall. Still, you're torturing me.
So you know what? I'm not gonna endure this longer. Over. From now on, you don't exist for me. I don't want to hear about you, ever.
The New James
Note in Alice and Lily's friends' carriage:
77/12/30
Girls, there's some urgent things I have to fix and I don't think I'll be able to come back here. See you at school.
Alice, do you remember the last letter I wrote you? Forget it all.
Lils
77/12/30
James,
You'll be surprise that I give you that letter right in the middle of the platform and leave without a word. The truth is I couldn't speak to you in front of Remus and this jerk of Black.
You're an idiot. Your last letter was idiot and the entire situation is idiot. Still, you're right… for this… Do you mind if we go in the Head-Students carriage and discuss about it? We have to talk… And I also want to show you a gift I received for Christmas… might be familiar to you.
This package contain your present… I would like you to show me, see if it's the good size.
Don't delay,
Lily
Note in the marauder's carriage:
Kids, the day is here. Alleluia Alleluia Alleluia! Don't wait for me. I have things to do (blink blink)! I'm the happiest man of the world!
Sirius, did I told you how much I love you? Well, I won't say it now, but I think that this country needs more brains like your.
James
Note on the door of the Head-Students carriage:
GO GET AN HOTEL
There are things that kids shouldn't see, neither do we.
Alice, Remus and Sirius
P.S. from Sirius: I think I took the right size…
So, I hope you liked it! You can let a review that I will send to the wonderfull author! Thank you and have a good holiday season!