Forbidden Affections

by Liquidtopaz'xo

Chapter o1

I keep my eyes shut, praying for the brightness behind them to be possessed by the hallway lights. My bed felt distinct, along with my blanket as well as my whole vicinity. This feeling was very strange and unpleasant, I did not like it one bit.

Please Please be a dream. Let me wake up in Phoenix.

Or anywhere but here, for that matter.

Waking up is an understatement. I had not gotten one lick of sleep all night, my nerves were on edge so bad I kept twisting and turning. I even made shapes out of the shadows on the ceiling. Also counting sheep certainly doesn't work, take it from me.

At the moment I wanted to cry. First, due to the fact that I made the moronic decision to move to Forks, Washington just so my mom, Renee, could finally have her own life with Phil, my step-dad. Even though she told me (more like begged me) over and over again I did not have too, but me being thoughtful and considerate, rejected politely. Therefore here I exist, in this lifeless town called Forks, with my dad Charlie.

Not that I'm complaining about Charlie. He's actually a really great dad and I love him with all my heart. Especially since he keeps quiet about most things and he doesn't try to force answers out of me, unlike Renee. He respects my privacy and doesn't mind a little silence once in a while, he doesn't try to fill every silence with noise. That's what I love about him, and that's one of the pluses for moving to Forks in the first place. I had to find a way to get away from Renee and her needing to know every single detail of my life, what I'm doing, where I am, who I have a crush on, ect. But I love my mom, and I'm going to miss her while I'm here. But I want her to be happy, right?

Secondly, I itched to cry because my body just decided to get exhausted from lack of sleep. NOT to mention, today is the first of school. Correction, today is my first day of school. Everyone knows the first days of school are the worst. Getting lost in the hallways, not knowing where to eat at lunch, and you don't have any friends to converse with. That's a lot of embarrassment and I don't take being embarrassed very well. I can already see everyone whispering 'that must be Bella Swan,' and staring at me. Of course everyone would already have heard of me, no shock there. As small as this town is, I would be more shocked if no one at all had heard about me. I just hope no one crowds me, or talk to me for that matter. I am not in the mood for anything or anyone today.

A deep, reverberating voice broke though my depressing thoughts, "Hey, Bells. You up yet?"

I sigh, and reluctantly open my eyes to the luminous sun shining through my curtain. I yell back, "Yeah, I am." Unfortunately, I think to myself. I sit up in my bed and look around tiredly. The lavender walls and soft beige carpet were a stark contrast to my current mood. Maybe some black walls and a red carpet would have sufficed.

My feet touch the carpet and I walk across the room to the door and open it. I look to my left and I can see Charlie moving about in his room already dressed in his police uniform. His stomach just slightly hanging over his belt. Panic slightly rose as a lump in my throat as I thought of how I will be attracting attention to myself by being late as well as being the new girl.

"You gonna stand there or start getting ready. You only have a half hour," he looked on awkwardly for a second, "sorry I did not get you up earlier."

Breathing out a sigh of relief, I respond, "S'okay. I will be ready in a sec." I go into the bathroom.

Looking in the mirror, I see a girl who looks worn, exhausted, and very homesick. The girl in the mirror has thick, stringy, dark auburn hair that is five inches below her shoulder and tends to curl at the ends. She also was a little past due for a trim. Her eyes were a dull shade of blue-green, but her straight, thick and long eyelashes are what made her eyes stand out. You could almost call them beautiful. Her lips were nothing special, a little on the full side. But the lack of a smile or any emotion made her look so monotonous and not worth a second look (in her opinion). I grimace at the girl in the mirror, then turn the sink water on.

After finishing my morning duties, which Charlie proceeded to rush me through, I got dressed. Nothing special, just some dark jeans, a white long-sleeved u-neck sweater, a black caridgan with a pair of black boots. I look in the full length mirror on the back of my door (which I forgot to thank Charlie for), and came to the conclusion that I looked pretty decent, if not a little attractive. The mascara I put on made my eyes look not so tired, with the help of some lip gloss. Overall, I was satisfied with the way I look. Despite all the skin I'm covering up, it was necessary because it seemed to get below 200 degrees here.

I went downstairs and into the kitchen to grab a S'mores poptart. Charlie was already in his squad car, as I could hear him beeping the horn. As I was leaving, I started having second thoughts about this whole 'school' thing.

"You ready?" Charlie asked as he was already backing out of the driveway.

"Uh, yeah sure...I am."

That is one thing I cannot do properly, lie good.

"Okay." That is what I love about my dad, he doesn't push or dwell on things to long, something Renee definitely always did. "How'd you sleep last night?"

I yawned as if on cue, "Not at all. My nerves got to me really bad, you know?"

"Well hopefully they are not to hard on you. They should not anyway, all the kids in this town are very friendly and welcoming. I think you will like it." I could not disagree with that last statement enough. "You'll make friends, Bells. Do not worry about it."

"Yeah, I hope." That was the last of the conversation as we pulled into the school parking lot. I felt the stirrings of butterflies in my stomach and my nerves became agitated. I barely heard Charlie over the million thoughts running through my sleep deprived brain.

"Welcome to Forks High."