A/N: I own nothing. Just something I wanted to do after seeing The Name of the Doctor.
As it happened, the Doctor did not have to say his true name. River had been able to utter it, silent to all but the impenetrable door before them. Impenetrable, that was, until then. Events transpired, villains plotted, heroes won. The name had been unheard by anyone. Or so they thought…
"I've got a faint audio trace… sounds like a female voice" said a female voice.
"We can try to boost the gain. Press the funny green button," replied a cool male voice.
Weeks had passed since the Doctor had left for Trenzalore. A crack team of researchers from UNIT were at that very moment analyzing temporal echoes from space. At least, they thought that of themselves. They were, in reality, a couple of curious co-workers staying a bit late after hours.
"Is there any way we can adjust the vertical pitch? It's still a bit hazy. All I'm getting is everyone else."
"Oh? Like who?" the female replied.
"Well, there's the Doctor, of course, and a young female. Possibly the young Oswald girl. Records match other voices, but some are unknown. And the chorus of creepy voices."
"I know, Arthur. I'm glad you're doing that. UNIT discipline or not, those voices make me want to crawl under the table or something."
"True. About that vertical pitch, Jules?"
"Oh, sorry!" she adjusted a small knob.
"I've isolated her voice. Beginning re-recording and isolation subroutine, now!"
The computer he was working on began humming loudly. They walked over to a nearby table to enjoy texting and scones while the results compiled.
"It was really nice getting the job here at UNIT! I never thought my English degree from university would get me far, but here I am!"
In reality, she was just a simple paper-pusher, with a minimal amount of security clearance.
"True, I've at least got my audio tech skills."
He actually had applicable skills, but did not know exactly how to apply them, or be socially adept, so he did not have a high security clearance either. Both, however, knew about the Doctor. Just then, the machine "dinged."
Ding!
"The results are in!" Arthur jumped over to the machine and set up the speakers for playback.
"Let's take a moment before we play this. It's pretty serious stuff" Jules solemnly warned.
They sat and contemplated their almost non-existent personal connection to the Doctor, and how they were about to find out his secret, the darkest secret of the universe.
"Here it goes…" Arthur began the recording.
Static crackled for a few seconds. Then an attractive, but dangerous-sounding, female voice began speaking.
"Well sweetie. Look at the trouble you're in now. Guess I'll have to step in. My dear dear … Bob."
The recording ended with a pop.
"What!?" they both exclaimed.
"His name is…"
"BOB!?"