Meeting You
by Mina
Or, as FanFiction.net would tell you now, this is by Mina3. ;3 >3 =3 Hey, this looks cool! Standard disclaimers for Digimon apply. I make no money, no nothin' (other that pleasure at writing for some strange reason…) by doing this. You want to sue someone? Try a government or something instead.
Warnings: Um, shounen ai, a little fluff, a little angst, sappy, cute, and other such weirdness of that effect, and my return to the Digimon fandom? ^_^ I'd been meaning to write this for quite a while, but never seemed to get around to it. However, now that I've been swallowed by Digimon: Frontier, it seems my interest has been re-ignited. (By the way, if you were one of the people who volunteered to send me AVIs of 01/02, could you please e-mail again? Somehow my account got wiped… -_-;; Mina is saaad.)
Pairings: Yamatai, because the Goggle Boy is a knucklehead. Pre-Takahika, in a short dose. 'Nuff said.
The last day of primary school. No more dragging feet to Odaiba Primary with his sister trailing behind, no more playing soccer on the cramped but meticulously kept fields, no more sleeping through mathematics with boring Mrs. Kanagawa, no more daydreaming about the trouble he'd cause later when he met up with Yamato downtown…
There would be no more normalcies---and Yagami Taichi felt like crying at that realisation.
Not that he would cry, mind you. No, there wasn't any reason to cry, and though he *felt* like crying, he wasn't going to. It was just that…well… Digital Lords, but this felt stupid.
Sighing, he pulled his knees up under his chin, staring out over the park and the streets. The graduation ceremony had taken *forever*. Hikari hadn't been feeling well, so he'd convinced his mom and dad to take her home as soon as it was done, promising that he'd follow in a while. 'I just wanna spend some time in my old haunts,' he'd told his mom with a crooked grin, hand behind his head. She'd smiled and ruffled his hair, telling him to have fun, like she always did.
More like he didn't want to *leave* his old haunts he thought with a snort, scowling at the empty landscape from behind the safety of crossed arms. Was it really such a bad thing that he didn't want to lose this familiarity, that he didn't want things to change? It had been bad enough returning from the Digitalworld to find that nothing had changed in the real world---the first time, only a few hours had passed because the Digitalworld hadn't yet synchronised with the real world yet. It was unfair when so many things had changed for himself and the other Chosen Children, when *he* had changed… True, there were parts that some people remembered…his parents, the Motomiyas who lived in his apartment complex, a few other kids scattered around the city that recalled Vamdemon's roundup looking for the Eighth Child… But the real world as a whole recalled nothing of that miracle, and it burned---burned like his heart, which didn't want to forget a minute of it.
He supposed it wouldn't have been that big of a deal had he not been the only one apparently going through this…well, dramatic bout of depression, he guessed. Koushirou was perfectly content to be left behind the others as they moved on to junior high, Mimi was leaving for the United States and had shed only a few tears at her farewell party a few days ago, Hikari and Takeru were the best of friends and nearly inseparable so it was doubtful that they'd even notice the elder Chosen Children missing, Sora was looking forward to taking "lady-like" classes in a month which was just too strange to think about for long, Jyou was already well into his brainiac classes, and Yamato had been branching out with taking music classes after school.
Taichi supposed it was that he felt a little lost. Koushirou had been his best friend as a kid…but they'd grown apart during the affairs in the Digitalworld. Sora had been a close friend as well, but lately she'd started getting all *girly*, and he didn't know how to deal with that at all… And Yamato didn't help things either, in that respect. In the last few months, when girls started to hear about his music lessons and piano playing, and that he was learning the bass guitar too… They were everywhere! Taichi couldn't go anywhere with the friend he'd made in the Digitalworld without being mobbed by girls, and it was annoying at best, frightening at worst. Yamato didn't seem to notice, though, and that's what made Taichi even angrier: his nonchalance, his cold demeanour, his playing attitude. It reminded him a bit of the Digitalworld, but mostly it reminded Taichi of how Yamato had been while under Cherrymon's influence.
And now the last vestige of normalcy, stupid though it sounded, was gone with the end of his primary school career.
"This is just so *stupid*…"
Saying it out loud didn't make it any better. He sighed again, and wondered why he was still out sitting in the grass, rather than giving in to the inevitable and walking home. There weren't any answers to be found out here, no sudden epiphanies that would explain all his problems and get them to make *sense*.
Leaning over on his side in a half-attempt to get up, he winced, digging through his pocket and frowning when he removed a slightly-tarnished harmonica from his pocket. Now how had *that* gotten in his dress jacket? he wondered. It was especially strange to find Yamato's prized harmonica in his jacket when his blonde friend hadn't been over to his house in *weeks*.
He turned the instrument over and over in his hands, allowing his knees to settle on the grass, all thoughts of leaving the school park forgotten. That callused pads of his fingertips trailed over the metal, idly crossing scuffs and gloss with a small smile. Yamato's graduation had been two days earlier, over at Hirata Kanzaki Primary. Lucky jerk; his graduation hadn't been nearly as long as the one Taichi and Sora had to suffer through. Ishida-san and Takaishi-san had thrown a great party afterwards, and he had a lot of fun bashing Yamato over the head with a feather pillow, watching it rain white fluff in the mostly immaculate room while Yamato scowled from his sprawled position on the floor… He knew that Takeru had come to the graduation keep Hikari company, but had Yamato shown up…?
It was a *stupid* thing to wonder about, he told himself again as he rubbed briefly at the tip of his nose. Yama always did his own thing, and even though Taichi had invited him---well, it didn't matter if he'd shown up or not. Yama would continue to do his own thing, and Taichi would just have to continue being used to it.
He stared at the harmonica, eyebrows drawing together. And why these sudden thoughts about Yamato anyway? It'd been two days since he'd seen the boy, though they'd talked on the phone just last night. They'd made plans to go and see the newest kung fu flick from Hong Kong that was playing in the Odaiba theatre. So why was he intent on tying himself up in mental and emotional knots that he couldn't understand?
"Dammit, you blonde brat. You're not even here and I'm getting confused and pissed off at you at the same time!"
It was strange. He always seemed in control even if he wasn't always calm, always seemed to know what was going on and what he was going to do even when he didn't have the faintest *clue* in reality. He was good at putting up that front, that "I'm king of the world and don't try to tell me otherwise or I'll kick you!" attitude as Hikari was fond of saying.
But it wasn't true---and Yamato had understood that even better than Hikari.
Was it fear that was doing this? Yes…yes, that was part of it. As he'd already suspected, it was the fear of where his life was going to head now. What was he going to do? Where was he going to go? He was only twelve years old and he felt more confused in that moment than he ever had in the Digitalworld, even when facing down Apoclymon.
It was funny, to dwell on thoughts of "fear". Every time he'd felt afraid…Yama had always been there to hold his hand. Even though they'd both said it was childish and unnecessary, it seemed the greatest thing in the world to have someone else's flesh clasped in his hand, squeezing back when things looked bleak…
Taichi flopped backwards onto the grass, watching the spring clouds gather overhead. "This is so, totally stupid. Maybe Hikari's right…maybe my hair *is* eating my brain."
The breeze picked up, rustling through the newly budding tree limbs with a click-clack noise. Set to wallow in his self-pity a bit longer, Taichi was startled when a small snort of laughter made him realise that he wasn't alone.
Eyes wide, he scrambled upright and stared straight ahead, trying to appear nonchalant as he heard the stranger move closer. He relaxed with a small smile, though, when he realised it *wasn't* a stranger, and a familiar warmth settled against his back. "If it's so stupid, why do you keep thinking about it?"
The voice was low, soft, and it rumbled into him through their contact. Taichi closed his eyes, smile growing. "Probably because I'm stupid and I have more hair then brain cells."
"Yeah, and being self-deprecating it really going to help things."
"What are you, my mother?"
"No, but she was worried, which was why I got sent back here to look for you."
Back here…did that mean he *had* come to the graduation? His heart was pounding almost in his throat, ears hot, and Taichi wondered at the reaction. Why was it such a little thing seemed like a Big Deal all of a sudden? Like everything else he'd been pondering, it didn't make any sense. He laughed after a moment, settling back into a more comfortable position with his head pillowed on Yamato's shoulder. "Mom worries way too much."
There was silence, and a hand briefly trailed through his hair and across his forehead. "I was a little worried, too."
The admission was spoken softly, and only served to confuse Taichi further. "Huh? Why?"
"You've just been…I dunno. Quiet. Withdrawn. Moody. If you don't watch it, Yagami, you're going to give me a run for my money in the "attitude" department."
"Never. You'll be the crown-prince and reigning champion forever." It was an automatic retort, but Taichi bit his lip as he thought about what Yamato had said. "I haven't been *that* bad, have I?"
"Honestly?"
"Yeah."
"You've been scaring me a lot lately. You used to talk all the time. Now when you talk, all I hear is 'blah, blah, blah'."
Taichi cocked his head to the side, sherry brown eyes straining for a look at Yamato's face. "What's that supposed to mean?"
Yamato turned and looked at him; it caused Taichi's head to slip off the blonde's shoulder and disrupt his balance. He ended up flopping into the grass with an undignified squeak. "It means you're talking, but you're not really *saying* anything, Taichi. And that's not like you."
Frowning again, Taichi looked away from the searching blue gaze. "Maybe that's because it seems stupid."
"That's all I've heard you say for the last twenty minutes. *What's* stupid, Taichi-kun? I can't help if you won't tell me what's going on."
Help… Looking up at the semi-cloudy sky, Taichi raised his hands in front of his face. It seemed odd to see them without gloves even though he hadn't worn gloves since those days in the Digitalworld, since Agumon had to be left behind, since he had decided to knock down an isolated boy's walls only to find that boy had come knocking back… "Maybe I'm afraid to tell you."
"Why? Because you think it's stupid?"
"…Maybe." Ah, yes, evasiveness at its best. What was he going to tell Yamato anyway? 'I was confused because I was thinking that everything stable in my life was leaving, and for some reason my thoughts kept returning to you and I don't know why?' Sounded like grounds for filing stalker charges, if not filing for outright insanity certification.
Yamato sighed, lying down on the grass with his chin pillowed in his hands. "That's such a copout. You know, Tai-kun, we've been through a lot together---and I really mean that, not just as some patronising bullshit. You helped me through a lot of things, you know. Why is it so hard to let me do the same for you?"
Taichi shook his head. "It's different." He set his jaw and kept his eyes closed; if he looked at Yamato, his will would cave, and he couldn't have that happen when he didn't understand what was going on in his head.
"Why? Because you're the one struggling this time? That puts a whole new, not-so-nice spin on our relationship, you know, if that's what this is all about."
There was anger there now, barely contained in Yamato's rich voice. It made Taichi clench his eyes shut until they hurt, hands balling into fists at his sides. He just wasn't any *good* at this! Sure, he could speak his mind and put his foot in his mouth in spectacular fashion, but that wouldn't fix anything. Not this new problem or his old ones, not the ones that were real or the ones that were the product of his imagination…
A hand gently closed on his fist, forcing the fingers to relax with repetitive strokes from guitar-callused fingertips. "Fine. You sit there and be all clammed up and confused for awhile---I'm going to talk, then, and you're going to listen."
It was a strange twist---Taichi being silent and Yamato talking---but Taichi merely bit his tongue and held his breath, waiting to see if Yamato would actually make good on his threat.
"You know better than anyone why I play at the lone wolf gig. I hate people---I hate their pettiness, their cruelties, their selfishness. And when I saw the way you were with Takeru when we first ended up in the Digitalworld…well, I didn't think you were any different. I thought you were patronising, and a liar---here you were telling my little brother who was scared witless that things would be okay and we were going to get home. I still don't know where you came up with that speech, but it was a damn good one---if I'd been just a little less cynical, I would have jumped in line to follow you.
"You're always telling me how stupid you are, which pisses me off, you know? Sure, you may not be the best student, but you're not flunking out by any means. You have a wonderful gift with people and with soccer, which is the envy of a lot of people. You're a natural born leader, and while you don't have a whole helluva lot of tact, your honesty…your sincerity…your hope… it made us all believe in you and what you said."
Yamato fell silent for a moment, and Taichi tried to find his voice. 'Where is this going?' he wanted to ask. 'Why are you doing this, bringing up these things that I want to remember but feel falling away from me?'
"You've been pulling away from us, though." The blonde's voice was soft, like the whisper of the breeze through the half-naked tree limbs and his fingers over Taichi's hand. "And I don't understand why."
It took a couple of tries and he was hoarse when he began, but slowly Taichi started to speak. "I never thought about it much when we were in the Digitalworld. I nearly lost all of you at some point or other, but you more so than the others. Not even Hikari tried to die on me as many times as you did, and she used to be predisposed to that kind of thing. And while…well, I did understand the whole lone wolf thing. It's because that's how I was, even though it never really seemed that way. Koushirou and Sora were my only real friends; I didn't let myself get close to anyone else, but I never…never really *depended* on them either."
Yamato chuckled. "Hard, isn't it---to admit that you need someone else."
Taichi swallowed, turning his face away to stare out at the darkening sky over the still skeleton-like trees. That's how he was: half-naked, half-skeleton, open from the inside out for Yamato to view and mix up to his heart's content. "I don't need anyone."
This was strange, stupid, and just plain not *fair*.
"I do." The admission was firm, as was the hand that squeezed his, lacing their fingers together. "Since I met you…I've needed someone just as much as I need my brother, my mom and dad…maybe even *more* than I need them. They're family, and you…you're something else."
Gods but this was confusing! Taichi finally turned to look at the blonde, shivering at the way sapphire blue eyes were watching him intently. "We've only known each other for a year, you know. Well, outside of the fact that we *all* used to live in the same complex."
"More like a lifetime if you count the time that passed in the Digitalworld." Yamato grinned, squeezing Taichi's hand once again. "And it's because of that that I can be honest with you: nothing between us is trifling---ever! No matter how silly you think something is, or how stupid it sounds, you can always tell me."
Taichi eyed him warily. "Promise you won't laugh?"
"Promise."
"Promise you won't beat me black and blue and make me call 'Gennai'?"
Yamato rolled his eyes but smiled. "Promise."
"Promise you won't run out and tell the others, along with any tabloid reporters you happen to come across?"
"Taichi…!"
"All right, all right!" Sighing, Taichi spoke his fears. "Everything's changing again. Nothing's going to be the same, and I don't know what to do. I don't know how to *deal* with all of this happening at once. And I keep getting mad at you and I don't even know why…"
"I used to get jealous of your sister," Yamato interjected with a laugh. "Remember right after the Vamdemon incident, before we returned to the Digitalworld for that last showdown? She was always getting sick because of the distortions, and you'd drop *everything* to make sure she was all right. It was the first time I'd ever dealt with you having your attention focused elsewhere. All the problems of our little group used to revolve around me in some way, so we were always fighting, always talking, always *together.* I got used to you always being there…and it was weird when you weren't."
Taichi snapped his head around while Yamato was talking, eyes going wide. "Really?"
"Really. Probably the same way you've been feeling since you realised that graduation was looming and we were going to be separated?"
"Well…uh…"
"We're not, though. I took my entrance exams for Odaiba Junior High, same as you." Yamato's smile was gentle and it reflected in his eyes, and Taichi contemplated what a change it was from the barriers of ice that used to be there.
To say that he was bewildered would have been an understatement. Taichi sat up, barely noticing that his hand was still linked with Yamato's. "But I thought you were gonna go for that magnet school! You worked so hard at the entrance tests and all those music lessons…"
Yamato shrugged. "Why bother? I spent too long investing myself in you to just let you escape from me for something as temporary as that."
It wasn't that their words to each other were a farce---no, that wasn't it at all. A dance, perhaps? An intricate pattern of steps that would lead to something beautiful if only they could get the order right… Yes, that seemed like it was it. But what were those steps? Where was the pattern? And the order…
'What do I mean to you?' he wanted to ask. 'What do you mean to me?' But he was young, and he was scared…very, very scared of what the answers would be.
Some things, though, were simple---and perhaps this was another one of those 'simple' things that only seemed to be complex. Deciding to take a chance, Taichi looked down at their interlocked hands, brow furrowing. He slowly pulled his hand free, wanting to test something but not wanting to hurt Yamato's feelings. He stared at his thumb and index finger, a faint smile tugging on one corner of his lips.
"What is it?"
"Something I saw my parents do when I was really little. I don't know where they got the idea from, or why I suddenly thought of it, but…" He held his thumb and finger forward, other fingers curled under, in what looked like a sloping letter 'C'. "Here, you do it to."
"This'd better not be another one of your crazy ideas that is going to get me swarmed by a herd of screaming girl-things…"
"Oh, just do it already!"
Yamato complied with a sigh, holding his fingers out. They touched, thumb tip to thumb tip, fingertip to fingertip, and Yamato stared in fascination as Taichi began to trace the shape they formed with his free hand.
"Two people can share the same heart, you know? I think it's like that with us, even when we don't think so."
"One heart…"
Taichi looked up with a sheepish laugh. "Sounds corny, huh? But with all the thinking I was doing earlier, all the stuff we were talking about, all the crazy stuff that's been going around in my head for what seems like *forever*… Well, it's the only explanation I could think of. Being a hothead and a braggart is easy…but being real is different. With you, I can be real…which is why I think I was afraid when I met you."
"You? Afraid?!"
"For a little while. Until I learned that I could trust you with the real me…just as you eventually learned the same."
"…You know, we sound like some weird, sappy couple from those romance shows my mom watches in the afternoon. The ones where she sighs and laughs and cries and goes through a box of tissues while her brain melts out onto the floor."
Taichi laughed, grabbing Yamato's hand and falling into his chest as if it were a matter of course. "Soap operas? You really think we sound that bad?"
"Well, sort of." Setting laughter aside, Yamato stared seriously down at the boy looking up at him from his lap. "No promises of 'I love you'." It lay unspoken between them; after witnessing his parents' divorce, it was the one thing Yamato was afraid of.
"I'm not sure I even know what that is."
"And forever…"
"Whatever forever we're allowed, my heart will be with yours."
The vow was solemn and serious---and the look given by sherry brown eyes shook Yamato to the core. "Despite everything…I would never take back meeting you."
Taichi smiled, and the sun spilled from behind the clouds, dispelling the promised gloom of rain. After that, it was a simple matter of gentle lips sealing an unspoken and unrealised promise that had been made upon their meeting.
Two souls.
One heart.
Forever…and always.
It was late---probably past midnight---when two pyjama-clad youngsters crawled through the darkness of the spare room, where two young men lay curled in a pile of blankets and pillows. Carefully they searched through a discarded dress jacket until they found what they were looking for.
Pausing to look at the two boys, sleeping peacefully with hands intertwined and smiles on their faces, the two shadows slipped quietly from the room and headed down the hall.
"Phew! I thought for sure Oniichan would wake up and catch us!" said the blonde boy, sliding with relief into his sleeping bag on the floor. He carefully placed the shiny harmonica in his bag, patting it to reassure himself that it was safe and sound.
"You too, huh?" said Yagami Hikari with a heartfelt sigh, stumbling over him into the lower bunk. "But I think it worked."
"It better have!" Takaishi Takeru's sharp retort was punctuated by a loud yawn. "We went through too much trouble to have it fail."
"What about the others, though?" Hikari gave her friend a worried look, brushing her bangs out from her eyes. "What are they going to think?"
"Who cares?" Takeru spoke quietly, sleep heavy in his voice as he smiled up at her with slitted blue eyes. "They'll be happy, right? That's all that matters."
Hikari smiled in return, settling her head down on her pillow. "You're right, Takeru-chan. Good night."
"You too, Hikari-chan."
Two young souls, united in cause. As sleep enveloped them, their breathing fell from the separated rhythm of two to the synchronisation of one. But they were too young to realise the significance, too innocent to care other than what they already understood.
Two souls.
One heart.
Forever…and always.