A/N: Hey everyone. This is a repost – I'm revamping this fic in an effort to actually finish it! Enjoy.
Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha. And I never will.
The Way It Has To BeChapter 1 – In the Dark
Miroku had a problem. One that was irresistibly consuming his every thought. And for the first time in a long time, it wasn't the Kazaana. But oddly enough, it was far more likely to kill him.
His troubles had begun a little over a week ago…
(begin flashback)
"Miroku-sama! Oh my God – are you alright?"
Miroku twisted his head in the direction of the voice, cursing the bandages covering his eyes. 'She sounds out of breath – has she been running?' he wondered. "Kagome-sama…forgive me for not standing in a lady's presence, but I'm more likely to fall on my face than anything," he said lightly.
"Huh? Oh, don't move! I just – I don't – what happened? I can't believe I was away…"
"Don't blame yourself," he rushed to reassure her. "Youkai don't just go into hiding while you're gone, it's true, but it's impossible for you to stay here all of the time."
"I should have been here!" she fretted stubbornly. "I could have stopped it!"
"Quite possibly," he agreed evenly. "But it's not that serious, really, Kagome-sama. Kaede-sama has said that the bandages will be off in a few days. It's by no means permanent."
"Oh, good," she sighed in relief, making Miroku wish that he could see her face at that moment. It wasn't often that he was the object of anyone's concern…
"Well," she said briskly, suddenly all business. "You, sir, are staying right where you are, and we'll look after you. Now, where, did that pillow of mine get to?" Intrigued, he listened to the sounds that signalled that she was rummaging through her belongings. While she was looking, he ventured a question.
"Kagome-sama?"
"Hmm?"
"Did you happen to see Inuyasha on your way here at all?"
"No," she replied, her voice sounding strangely flat. "He's…not here."
A wave of anger crept over him at her words. He hadn't been sure, what with being blinded by the venom from that damned snake youkai in that last battle, but he could have sworn that he had seen Kikyo standing off to the side somewhere nearby. If Inuyasha wasn't here, then chances were good that he was with her. "Kagome-sama-"
"He's with Kikyo, I know," she interrupted softly. His surprise must have shown on his face, because she chuckled lightly. "Sango-chan told me."
Miroku once again questioned the powers-that-be why such a loving, forgiving soul had been stuck with the incredibly dense hanyou. "Forgive me for asking, but…aren't you angry?"
The rummaging noises started up again, and she was mumbling to herself. "Damn pillow, where are you? I swear, I can't find anything these days…such a mess…"
He would not be deterred. "Kagome-sama?"
She gave a gusty sigh – he could almost see her blowing her bangs out of her face. "Of course I am. But the way I see it, there's not an awful lot I can do about it. No matter what happens, he'll go to her. Always." A saddened note entered her voice, making him frown. "That's the way it has always been."
A poignant silence hung in the air.
"A-ha!"
He jumped. "What?"
"Er…sorry. Found it! The pillow, I mean. You can't honestly tell me that you like laying with your head on the hard floor like that!" He heard her shift closer…his hands twitched in response. He sensed rather than felt her lean over him to lift his head and slip something unbelievably soft between him and the ground.
'Aah…that's nice…'
A soft floral scent surrounded him as she fussed over the pillow, making sure that it was just so. He breathed deeply, taking in as much as he could. It was intoxicating. Slowly, his cursed hand moved upwards, seeking out the feminine curves that he admired so avidly. And that's when it happened – the world turned upside-down.
He felt fingers fluttering softly on his cheek, his forehead…gently pushing his hair out of his bandaged eyes. The touch was so light; it reminded him of the silky fluttering of a butterfly's wing. His hand fell to the floor, all desire to grope completely gone. He let out a slightly shaky sigh as those feather-light fingers brushed his cheek once more, then lifted.
"Get some sleep, Miroku-sama," she murmured quietly, somewhere above his head. Her voice was a combination of caring, sadness and compassion, making him wish even more fervently that he could see her face. Just one look – to see that kind of caring directed at him…from anyone… He felt her getting up to leave and a sudden urgency gripped him. "Don't go."
She paused. "Alright."
Miroku listened to her settle herself comfortably beside him. But those delicate fingers didn't return as he had hoped. He reached out with his own hand, seeking hers…and his fingers brushed something that they really, really shouldn't have.
"Miroku-sama!" she scolded him hotly.
He cringed and waited for the inevitable. And waited some more. "What, no slap?"
She huffed at him. "You are impossible! Injured and blind, and you still try to cop a feel!"
A sly grin spread across his face instinctively. "Of course."
"Gah! Why, you…I'm not going to give you the punishment that you deserve right now, because I don't want to accidentally make your injuries worse. But don't worry, I'll just save it up for when you're better." Her words were angry, as usual in these circumstances, but this time he could hear the smile in her voice.
"Oh, good. Something to look forward to."
"Pervert," she said laughingly. Then she quietened. "Go to sleep, Miroku-sama. We need you well again." To his delight, the cool, gentle fingers returned, stroking over his face softly…lulling him to sleep.
(end flashback)
That had been a week ago. Since that day, Kagome had nursed him faithfully day and night, only leaving his side when necessary. It had surprised him, considering how great their need for Shikon shards had become. Naraku was in possession of the greater portion of the Shikon no tama, and every day of hunting time was precious. He had no idea how she had persuaded Mr. Impatience-with-dog-ears to remain in the village for so long, but he was immeasurably grateful.
And in the evenings, the butterfly-wing touches would return…the highlight of his day. Once everyone had either left for the night or fallen safely asleep, Kagome would shuffle over to his bedside and tell him stories of what had happened that day, running her fingers over his or his arm ever so gently. He wondered how she knew…knew that he craved the human contact, that it kept him anchored in a world that he couldn't see. He treasured those bedside conversations, keeping them close to his heart.
But today was the day when the bandages would come off. Kaede had looked him over that morning, and declared that he was ready to see again. He was both looking forward to it and dreading it immensely. Looking forward to being able to finally see once more…dreading the loss of those feather-light fingers.
Inuyasha was not helping matters any. "Damn monk, I would have been over that days ago…weak humans, take so long to heal –"
"Inuyasha!" Kagome's voice rang out angrily. "He's done very well to recover even this fast!"
"Hold still now, Miroku," Kaede warned him. He felt the touch of cold metal against the side of his head. Ah, Kaede was using those 'scissors' that Kagome had brought. Marvellous inventions, those. A few snips, and the material around his head had loosened. Kaede carefully removed the binding. "Keep your eyes closed." Miroku worked his facial muscles a bit, getting them used to their new freedom. "Alright…now open them slowly."
Miroku cracked his eyelids open a fraction. Light flooded into his vision, making him wince. "It's too bright…everything's blurry."
"Blink your eyes a few times, get them accustomed to the change. It'll clear up soon." He blinked obediently, feeling tears spill down his cheeks. Gradually his sight cleared, and he began to make out his surroundings. Shippo was sitting beside him, staring up at him worriedly. Kaede's face was directly in front of him, concern lining her features. Sango stood off to the side, fidgeting nervously. But they weren't who he wanted to see.
"Kagome-sama?"
"Over here, Miroku-sama," she called happily. He looked around – and saw her standing beside an irritated-looking Inuyasha. His heart fell. He hadn't expected it to hurt, seeing Kagome by her hanyou companion. But he wouldn't risk his life by challenging the man. After all, that was the way it was supposed to be.
Wasn't it?
But he would never, as long as he lived, forget those feather-light touches in the dark.