VILLAGE ON FIRE

by Alecto

"A youkai is attacking!" A panicked villager screamed. "A demon is attacking the village!"

"How do you know?" Shouted another.

"The huts are on fire and the sky is getting dark!"

Of course that was the dead giveaway of a youkai assault on an innocent village; things spontaneously combust and the sky turns purple. How? Why? No one knows, it's just one of those things. The purple sky and fire are just for effect anyway, along with the dramatic background music, gusts of wind at just the right moment, and slow motion action. The long pauses and intense glares are pretty cool too.

Five travelers near the outskirts of the village heard the frightened cries and ran to investigate. Said five travelers happened to be Inuyasha, Kagome, Shippou, Miroku, and Sango.

"We heard screaming. Do you know where the youkai is?" Miroku inquired the nearest villager.

Before the villager could answer the youkai in question came into view.

"It's a water demon." Shippou said.

Inuyasha had unsheathed his sword and was ready to fight. "I can take this weak bastard on no problem!"

"If the village is being attacked by a water demon, then why are the huts on fire?" Kagome asked whoever cared to listen.

A villager who heard the miko answered. "I honestly don't know. Us village folk are usually too busy running around in circles screaming to think about it."

"It figures you idiots would be." Inuyasha commented. "I'm gonna go gut that youkai."

The hanyou took a running start before leaping high into the air and bringing his sword down on the offending demon's head. Crimson blood bubbled and gushed out around where Inuyasha's blade was sunk into the water youkai's skull. He removed his blade from the gouge and sheathed it.

"Well, that was quick." Inuyasha said. "What was the point of that anyway? We didn't even get a shikon no kakera! I'm sick of saving all these pansy-ass villages that are too weak to defend themselves. I mean, what's that point of it? We could be doing better stuff with our time, but instead we're saving these losers." The hanyou gestured towards some nearby village peoples with his thumb. "And it doesn't get us good ratings on TV either."

Kagome blinked. "Oookay…so what would be a better use of our time?"

Silence…

"I honestly don't know. It's up to those god awful writers to decide that."

"So what do we do until then?"

"Sit on our asses and wait for the next episode to come out."

Sango folded her arms. "Whose idea was it to only give me one line?"

Shippou gazed off into space thoughtfully. "Well there was that one line… Y'know, that line. The one that you said. Or maybe Inuyasha said it. But it was… I actually think it was more than one line. Yeah! It was two or three lines, and you said them. Or maybe it was Inuyasha. But the point I'm trying to make here is that one time you did have more than one line. Unless it was Inuyasha's line. If it was than the point I'm trying to get to you is pointless."

A villager dumbstruck on the sidelines pointed out, "Hey ummm… Our huts are still on fire."

(A/N: I really enjoy writing stuff like this, I'm not expected to type thousands of words and I don't have to be really descriptive and I can have no plotline whatsoever. Of course there is some OOCness, it's a parody. I had an urge to make fun of the fact that every time something bad happens to a village, things randomly catch fire regardless of what it is.)