A/N: I've really been wanting to do this and because I was home sick I finally can. This story consist around James and Kendall, but does have Carlos an Logan in it, a lot. I hope you enjoy. of course I do not own big time rush or the lyrics in this story. And also all mistakes are mine.

~ means time skip in the story

_ Means different story

Age:6 Fear of the dark

"Mommy, when are they getting here'' Little six-year-old Kendall asked, excited for the days events.

"Soon sweetie, just be patient.'' Jennifer replied. the red-headed woman had invited the boys over for a sleep over, seeing as they were now in first grade. All the other parents thought it was a great idea and had agreed immediately.

"Ugh I'm so bored.'' Kendall whined. He wanted his best friends to get there and play with his new superhero toy his mom had gotten the day before.

The four boys had grown very close over the year, when they had met in kindergarten. It all started when Carlos had accidentally knocked over his water onto James cloths during snack time. the little Latino had apologized numerous times as Kendall and Logan helped him clean up the small mess. After that day they started going over to each others houses for play-dates. They had never had a sleep over so this would be the first time they would spend the night at Kendall's house.

Finally after what felt like forever to Kendall, he heard the door bell ring and jumped up. Carlos was the first to be dropped off since his papi had to go into the police station that morning.

"Carlos!'' Kendall cheered, running over and giving his friend a hug.

"Kenny!'' Carlos hugged back, glad to see his older friend. "Where's everybody else?'' Carlos asked, confusion crossing his features

"Mommy said they will be here soon. What's in the bag?'' Kendall looked over the Latino as he noticed the blue bag.

"My sleeping bag, pillow, and...'' Carlos pulled out an action figure from the small bag. ''My new Super Man toy.'' Carlos showed the other.

"Cool, My Spider man action figure is upstairs and I have more if Logan and James don't have one.'' Kendall said. Just as they were about to sit down, they heard the doorbell ring again. They both flew to the door, eyes lighting up when they fell on the smallest boy of the group.

''Logie!'' They both yelled in unison.

"Hey guys. Ahh-'' Logan cried when he was tackled to the ground in hugs, while the two adults just laughed and helped them back up.

"Alright, I'll see you later baby.'' Logan's mother planted a sloppy kiss to his cheek, earning an"EK!'' from her son. The others just laughed and pulled Logan into the living room.

"So, What did you bring?'' Carlos asked quietly. They had learned early on that Logan was a timid child and had to talk gently and quietly if they wanted Logan to talk back.

"Well, my mommy got me a new book that talks about plants and stars and the atmosphere and-''

"Okay okay, what else did you bring besides that?'' Kendall asked getting a little bored. He loved the kid to death, but space was not his thing. He would much rather play hockey with his friends than get a lecture about stupid stars.

"Umm, she also got me this,'' Logan pulled out his Bat man action figure and showed it to his friends.

"Awesome, now we just need James and then we can play superhero battles upstairs.'' Kendall cheered happily.

Not even two minutes later the door bell rang again and all three headed for the door once again.

"Jamie!'' Kendall was the first to tackle his friend in a hug.

"You excited Jamie?'' Carlos questioned. The little brunette nodded then turned back to his mom to tell her goodby since she had a flight to catch.

''Come on, let's go up to my room and play.'' Kendall insisted

James pulled on his overnight bag and followed his friends to the stairs. Just as they were about to run up to Kendall's room, Mamma Knight stopped them.

"Try to be quiet boys. The baby is still asleep.'' She explained, referring to Kendall's new born baby sister Katie. They all nodded and ran up the stairs to Kendall's room.

"So, what do you guys wanna do first?'' Kendall asked his friends, who now sat on the bed.

"How about superhero battles.'' Carlos suggested. Two of the three boys cheered, as they grabbed their action figures. But James, on the other hand, just folded his hands together and looked down at his lap.

"Come one Jamie, get your superhero and play with us.'' Kendall said, reaching for his best friend. James continued to look down and a small frown played on his features.

"James what's wrong?'' Logan asked calmly, seeing the the frown on his face.

"I...I don't have one.'' James said sheepishly.

"You can use this one.'' Kendall said. James lifted his head and saw Kendall handing him his Iron man action figure.

"Thanks Kenny.'' James said, taking the toy, and letting the battle commence.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Time skip~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hours later all four boys were found on the couch. Their limbs lazily laying on one another, watching one of Kendall's favorite movies, 'Spider man 2'. The boys had piled onto the couch about an hour ago and hadn't moved since.

By the time 9:30 had finally come around the movie had ended and all four boys were fighting to stay awake, when Mamma Knight had suggested to call it a night and get ready for bed. Of course they had all whined, but did as they were told, not wanting to upset Jennifer.

They each rolled out their sleeping bags and laid down. Logan laid beside Carlos, while James lied down beside Carlos and Kendall next to James at the end. Mamma Knight came around and kissed each boy before turning out the light. Three of the four boys closed their eyes, while a certain hazel eyed brunette boy came to the realization that his blonde friend didn't sleep with a nightlight anymore. His eyes widened in fear, but no way was he going to tell his friends. He was not a baby.

James held back a whimpered and scooted closer to Kendall's side. He turned on his side and locked his eyes on Kendall's small frame, letting his eyes slip shut.

James woke up, panting and sweating. His eyes brimmed with tears as he remembered his nightmare. his breathing was quick and shallow, and his body was shaking. A small whimper escaped his small lips as he tried to catch his breath. He wished he could be back home with his mommy and a nightlight. He was scared out of his mind, making more tears flow down his flushed cheeks.

Suddenly the small brunette heard movement and a hand grab his shoulder. James jumped and let another whimper escape his throat.

"James?'' A sleepy Kendall asked, sitting up a bit.

James remained quiet. He didn't want Kendall to know he was crying and acting like a big baby. James trembled as more tears fell from his face.

"Jamie, what's wrong?'' Kendall was becoming very worried for his friend and tried to wrap an arm around his shoulders, but James just flinched away.

"Jamie, I can't help if you don't tell me what's wrong.'' Kendall exclaimed. James couldn't take it anymore and jumped into Kendall's arms.

''I-It's so d-dark Kenny.'' James sobbed quietly so he wouldn't wake the others.

"It's okay. I'm here Jamie.'' Kendall cooed, running a small hand down James quivering back.

"D-don't let t-the m-m-monsters get me.'' James cried. clutching tightly to Kendall's shirt.

"I won't. I'll be your Knight.'' James pulled his face from his chest and looked at Kendall.

"Wh-what do y-you mean?'' James asked quietly.

"I'm a Knight. I'm supposed to protect the ones I love. That means you Jamie.'' Kendall explained. James settled back on Kendall's chest as they laid back down.

"Promise?'' James asked shyly

"I promise. I'll always be your Knight.'' with that they both feel into a much more peaceful dreamland

Age:15 Fear of rejection

To say James Diamond was stressed would be the understatement of the year, With hockey, choir, and tons of homework, he felt he would explode at any moment. But that wasn't the only reasons why he was so stressed. James harbored a deep secret that not even his best friend Kendall Knew. What's the secret the tall brunette had been keeping? James was gay. He had noticed new feeling for his blonde headed best friend Kendall about two years ago and they still haven't left his mind. He knew he shouldn't feel like this, but it was hard not to With Kendall's blonde hair, green eyes, and bushy eyebrows. And how Kendall could always make him smile, by laughing and always being there for him. He seemed so perfect.

How he longed for Kendall to just kiss him, to finally be able to call him his. Contrary to popular belief, James had never kissed a girl. He wanted his best friend to be his first. But that didn't seem possible, seeing as all the girls cooed over the captain of the hockey team. There was no way that Kendall Knight could ever be gay.

James?'' the brunette looked up and at his best friend from where he sat on the bench.

''What's wrong?'' Kendall asked.

"Nothing, just tired.'' James replied a little irritated. Kendall offered to help him up, but James just pushed him away, skating back onto the ice, not missing the hurt look Kendall gave him as he skated away. James hadn't meant to be mean or hurt him, but he was to upset to talk to anyone at the moment.

Kendall stood there kinda shocked that his best friend wouldn't talk to him. For a while he had noticed James acting a little weird around him, like when he would accidentally touch James' hand and a blush would creep up his face, or when he would help James with something and James would push him away trying to do it himself, or when he would help James write a song and he would catch the brunette staring at him.

"What's up his butt?'' Carlos asked as him and Logan skated over to the tall blonde.

"I don't know.'' Kendall answered. "He's been acting very strange lately.''

"Got any ideas why?'' Logan questioned him. Kendall looked over at James then back to his other best friends

"If I'm right, then I'll call you guys later tonight.'' Kendall skated off the ice and grabbed his bag.

"What does that mean?'' Carlos and Logan asked in unison.

"You'll see.'' Was Kendall's reply as he vanished into the cold evening.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Time skip~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

James huffed as he entered his house. He still had a ton of homework to do and hadn't eaten all day, though, he wasn't very hungry. The tall brunette headed up the stairs and climbed into his desk chair, pulling textbooks from his book-bag and laying them on the table. He decided to start on his Biology assignment then work his way through. setting his phone on the table, James picked up his pencil and started writing.

Just as he was about mid-way threw his paper he saw his phone buzz. James dropped his pencil and opened the new text message.

Kendork: Hey

James sighed, but replied anyway.

Jamie: Hi

He put the cell phone down and not even a minute later his phone buzzed again. He quickly opens the message up.

Kendork: Whatcha doin'?

James looked down at all the papers littering his desk and heaved a heavy sigh before replying.

Jamie: Nothin' you?

Before James can even set the phone down it buzzes again

Kendork: stuff, hey can I ask you something?

James contemplates this for a minute, what would Kendall want to ask? James sighed again and answered

Jamie: sure, I guess

A few minutes go by before another message pops up.

Kendork: Will you meet me at the park, I really need to talk to you.

James looks up at his homework then back to the phone.

Jamie: Yeah, be there soon.

James tucks his phone back into his pocket and runs down the stairs, grabbing his scarf and jacket. The cold Minnesota night hits his bare skin, sending a cold rush down his spine. He wraps the jacket closer to his body and heads for the park, which is about three minutes away.

Once he arrives he sees no sign of Kendall and is about to head back when he sees a red and black beanie coming towards him. Kendall seemed to be hiding something behind his back as he approached James.

"Hey.'' Kendall said softly.

"Hey.'' A small silence drifted between the two before James spoke again. "So, why are we out here, freezing our butts off.'' Kendall smiled and pulled his hand from behind his back. In his hand was a small white rose, James' favorite kind.

''James, I know things between us haven't been ideal lately and we don't spend a lot of time together, but I miss you so much. I miss your smile and your bright hazel eyes. I miss hearing you sing like an angel. I miss hearing your jocks. I miss the way you crinkle your nose when your frustrated. And, more importantly, I miss our time together.'' James nodded and kept silent as Kendall continued. '' James I miss everything about you and there is something I really have to ask you.'' James waited for a question, but it never came. Instead of Kendall leaned in placing his lips on James' soft pink ones. At first James was very shocked and surprised, trying to understand what was happening, but not even a second later the gears in his head began to turn and he melted into the light kiss. It felt like everything a kiss should be, just light and smooth.

Kendall broke them apart when air began to leave their bodies, begging for oxygen. Kendall looked up at James.

"I love you.'' James couldn't speak over the huge smile he was wearing, so Kendall just laughed and wrapped an arm around his waist, leading them to James' house. the walk to the house was quiet and peaceful, and in that moment everything was okay in James' world. They reached the front porch, James still smiling like an idiot. He turned back to Kendall, who had leaned in for a kiss goodnight. The tall brunette leaned in feeling the warmth of Kendall's lips against his, smelling like fresh hot coco. he thought nothing could ruin this night, that was until...

"James!'' James turned away and looked directly at his mom, nothing but fear evident in his clear eyes.

"M-Mom.'' James stuttered.

"James, I can't believe you would do this. My only son gay. That's a disgrace, you're a disgrace.'' She seethed with anger and disappointment.

"Wait mom I c-can explain. I t-thought you were s-supposed to be back t-tomorrow'' James tried to reason. tripping over his own words.

"Why would you do this to me!'' Brooke yelled, now breaking down and sobbing. '' And you to Kendall, I thought you were different.

"Wait, we can explain. It's not Ja-.''

"No, I don't want an explanation. I want you out, NOW!''She yelled, causing Kendall to grab James by the arm and run down to his house.

As they entered Kendall's house James couldn't help but let the tears fall. Kendall lead him to the living room, where a fire was still roaring, and had James sit down. Instantly a sob tore through James vocal cords. The blonde scooped the sobbing boy into his arms and into his lap. James wrapped his lengthy arms around Kendall's waist, burying his head into the crook of his neck.

"It's okay Jamie, It's going to be okay.'' Kendall tried to sooth.

"N-No i-i-it's not.'' James cried.

"Yes it is. remember what I told you when we were six and you were still afraid of the dark?'' Kendall asked running a hand through his hair. James just shook his head.

"I told you I would always be your Knight.'' Kendall reminded, making James lifted his head and look at him.

"Promise?'' James asked quietly.

"I promise, I'll always be your Knight.'' James quieted down and let the light humming of Kendall lull him to sleep, while Kendall protected him from the world.

Age: 17 Fear of stormy nights and nightmares (Not as long as the other two)

A certain blonde, green eyed boy awoke from his light sleep when something outside his window flashed, like a camera set on high. Kendall immediately flung off the comforter and made his way to the bathroom when the need to pee became to much. He quickly relieved himself than made his way back to the bedroom. He grabbed the navy blue comforter and pulled it back up, sighing in content when his body was wrapped in warmth. Just as his eyes were about to drop a loud clap of thunder drew from outside. He heard the person in the other bed shift around some. not long after more and more lighting and thunder came from outside. Kendall could here the harsh pounding of the rain against the window. A sudden cry came from the other bed. Kendall was up in a flash, running over to his boyfriend's bed.

"James, James wake up!'' Kendall grabbed The brunettes flailing arms, stopping him from thrashing, but not waking him up from his horrible nightmare.

"I'm-I'm so-sorry, Please. I-I...'' James cried out, tears beginning to fall like bullets down his finely shaped cheek bones and down his neck onto his shirt.

"James, Baby wake up. Please it's just a nightmare. They're not real.'' Kendall pleaded, kissing James' cheek softly.

James hazel eye's shot open upon recognizing his boyfriend's calm voice.

"K-Kendall?'' James croaked through broken sobs.

"Yes, yes Jamie it's me.'' Kendall cooed. The blonde boy pulled his lover into his arms as James wrapped himself around Kendall. James felt a burning in his eyes as more tears quickly raced down his face. Kendall began rubbing his back and shushing him, trying to calm him down a little.

"Do you want to talk about it?'' Kendall asked. For a long while James remained quiet, flinching every time a loud clap of thunder rang in his ears. But eventually James felt calm enough to try and tell his lover what he had dreamed about.

"I-I...I was there again.'' James said simply, just loud enough for only Kendall to hear above the pounding rain.

"What do you mean baby?'' Kendall asked gently, caressing his tan cheek.

"Minnesota, W-With my m-mom.'' James stuttered. Instantly an emotion of anger boiled underneath Kendall's skin. He hated that James relived these horrible things in his own dreams. He hated that James had to remember the day his mother disowned him...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Time skip~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Flash back

''Are you sure you want to go through with this Brooke.'' James' mothers lawyer and life long friend asked.

"I'm sure I do not want a fag for a son.'' Brooke spat. She looked at her son across the small court room, sending him a glare, then turning back to her lawyer.

Kendall sat next to him, holding his hand with his grandmother on the other side. James always admired his grandmother. She didn't care who James dated. She just wanted her grandson to be happy. She had always supported her grandson in all his choices.

"Then it's settled." Brooke signed the last of the papers and giving full custody of James to his grandmother.

As the meeting came to an end the lawyer demanded that they say their goodbye's before leaving for good. James carefully approached his mother, terrified to the bone to even speak with her. He hadn't seen or talked to her since the night she threw him out.

"Just take this and leave.'' Brooke shoved an envelop into his hands harshly and starts to walk away, but James grabbed her by the shoulder before she could leave.

"Wait.'' He says quietly.

"What. Haven't you done enough.'' Brooke turns around and looks directly into his eyes.

"Why can't I just explain myself to you?'' James question, his own blood boiling with anger now.

"Because there is nothing to explain. You just can't get it through you're thick head can you? I tried all my life to make sure you were happy and this is how you repay me? How am I supposed to have any grandchildren? Why would you do this to me? I thought you loved me, but I guess not. I can never love a son who chooses this life style. I can never Love you..."

end of flash back

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Time skip~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kendall rocked the now sobbing boy in his arms. The anger had completely diminished, leaving the to in sorrow. Kendall couldn't stand the way his lover grieved over this. James is a hiccuping, crying mess. The storm outside making it worse.

"A-Am I th-that much o-of a sc-screw-up?'' James whimpers, clutching his hands on Kendall's t-shirt.

"Never, you are not a screw up. I know it's hard baby, but you'll always have me. What you went through was hard, and I know that, but you'll make it through this and I'll be there every step of the way.

"Then why does she hate me?'' James choked out. Kendall felt all the hurt and pain in that small sentence. Another silence fell over them as Kendall continued to run the others back and rock them back and forth while James cried harder on his shirt.

After another 30 minutes had gone by, James was still sobbing away and it seemed like everything Kendall was trying to do wasn't working. But it didn't take long for an idea to form in his head. Kendall detached himself from his boyfriend earning another heart wrenching cry stabbing at his heart.

"It's okay I'm just getting something.'' Kendall leaned down and kissed him on the cheek before reaching under his bed and pulling out his guitar case. He strummed to make sure it was in tune than began the only song he knew would calm his distressed lover down.

"Come stop your crying it will be alrightJust take my hand hold it tight
I will protect you from all around you
I'll be here don't you cry

For one so small, you seem so strong
My arms will hold you
Keep you safe and warm
This bond between us can't be broken
I'll be here don't you cry

Cause you'll be in my heart
Yes you'll be in my heart
From this day on for now and forever more
You'll be in my heart
No matter what they say
You'll be here in my heart always

Why can't they understand the way we feel?
They just don't trust what they can't explain
I know we're different, but deep inside us
We're no that different at all

Cause you'll be in my heart
Yes you'll be in my heart
from this day on for now and forever more
You'll be in my heart
No matter what they say
You'll be here in my heart always
Always...''

Kendall lifted his head to see more tears flowing down James face, but he knew they were tears of joy. James quickly wrapped his arms around Kendall as he set the guitar on the floor and lied back down with his lover safely resting in his arms.

"Thank you Kenny.'' James whispered, tears starting to dry up.

"No problem. I'll always be your Knight.'' Kendall reassured.

"Promise?'' James asked.

"I promise.''

"And one more thing.'' James said before sleep completely took them away.

"Yes?'' Kendall asked a little sleep induced.

"I love you.'' James kissed Kendall on the cheek lightly.

"I love you too.'' Kendall rested his head on James' and let the sounds of softer rain take him away.

~Fin~

A/N: Alright, again I hope you liked that. Please please Please leave a review. I spent a lot of time on this and I really want to know what you think. Also if you're reading any of my others stories I will try to update soon and one last thing. If you like sick fics I have one called 'collection of sick fics' and I will do any pairing you want slash or friendship.

~Mambrino~