Ngoc Chau does not own Bleach.
Um, I think the premise of this prompt was better than the fic itself. I had originally planned for it to show how when he hurt Nemu, he also hurt himself. Because the idea went something like this: Nemu gets beaten up badly, broken and bleeding; Mayuri retreats into his office but he keeps the bruises and blood(he hit her too hard that he broke a few knuckles and they bled too) on his hands as a sort of self punishment for hurting Nemu. It's not just emotional pain, but it's also corporal pain.
So... um... please read and review.
Prompt: Pity
Everyone had said that he only beat her because he was afraid of other women. He took out his own insecurities and weaknesses on her to make himself feel strong, they said. Behind his back, they taunted that the only reason he made her wear that short skirt was because he had a fetish for it, because he liked to ogle her ass. They argued it was probably true because if he had built her for function, why the hell would he give her long hair and big tits? Why even a girl? Why not a man? They laughed that he probably had her because he was still in denial in his closet. And the only reason she was sticking by him was because he had put a self-destruct bomb inside her that he could activate if she ever so dared to leave him.
Perhaps the last one was true(Kurotsuchi Mayuri was, after all, a careful man). But Akon knew there was more to it.
In the beginning Akon had envied and hated(only slightly) his chief for having created her for himself, guarded her from all yet used her as his shield. Then soon, he felt only pity for that man. He along with a few other members had always had their suspicions about Mayuri's secret affection for his lieutenant and only recently was it confirmed by the concrete proof of the marriage certificate signed between the two of them and word of it being declined at a Captain's meeting.
Akon supposed that knowing that the shinigami spoke of this event angered him because Nemu appeared with more bruises than ever. At least once a day was a beating for her and often times it was simply for no reason. Everything had changed. His chief became all at once aloof and more brutal, no longer himself, but rather he was playing the character that everyone wrote after looking at him. There was passion but the hollow sort where you just give it all your might without really thinking about it. Akon wondered if his chief was trying to show everyone that he wasn't weak, that he didn't care for anyone and didn't need them at all, whatever it was, he was different. Nemu herself seemed different too, the way that she always stood closer to the chief would've made him think that she wanted to be hurt, that she was putting herself at his mercy for the hell of it.
Sighing.
He loved her.
Akon could've taken her for himself, protected her and hidden her away from his chief. He was but a rank below the lieutenant in the SDRI, she had some affection for him and he for her; any relationship they had would be allowed, even encouraged by all for he would not beat her. But when he thought back on his chief, debt and obligation stopped him from even coming close to her. Without Mayuri's recommendation when Urahara Kisuke was the captain and head of the organization, he probably wouldn't even be out of the Maggot's Nest.
Besides, pity is all the more stronger than desire. So is guilt.
Nobody could see that as Mayuri bloodied up and broke Nemu into pieces, the same thing was happening to Mayuri inside. They couldn't see that as she struggled to stay conscious just for him, to suffer along with him; he wasn't smiling, he wasn't laughing. As he smoked his cigarette and watched Mayuri bark at her while he kicked her on the floor, a thought came to him, 'The chief's fists must hurt if he's kicking her.' His white knuckles were bleeding, clenched tight together as he swung his leg downwards a few more times.
Now the same number of shinigami who mocked him at night stared with aghast eyes. He heard them question why he would still beat her if he tried to marry her. Breathing heavily, his mouth open with gasps coming out, Mayuri stormed out of the room away to his office. The shinigami and scientists there were unsure if they were to touch her or not. Akon knew, only an idiot wouldn't be able to figure it out.
Akon knew, he always knew what to do when their captain and lieutenant were busy. For as long as he remembered since the 12th's previous captain and lieutenant had disappeared on some scandalous charge, he had always been the third seat there.
He carried her to the 4th division, it was unlikely that Mayuri would want to see her now. She struggled to speak outside. Her voice was soft, ragged, it reminded him of fine cut class that had been shattered into jagged shards.
"Please… tell him… I… I'm sorry." The chief was really lucky to have a girl like that by his side. So few had someone like that, maybe that was why he was so angry? He wasn't allowed to have her, but had protocol ever stopped him? No, it never did and Akon could only wonder why Mayuri was taking this one so personally. If anything, he would've assumed that Mayuri would've just spat in their faces, not caring... Apperantly he did care enough to do this...
First he had felt envy, jealousy, and now all he knew for them was pity.
It grew when he returned back to the labs and went to inform his chief that he had taken Nemu because she was in the way in the labs. He was at his computer, but Akon knew it was just for show. Perhaps he had been resting earlier, most likely thinking about how he and Nemu was a piece choice of gossip chewed up and spat out at in the barracks of the Gotei 13 and possibly lower classes. He noticed the hands most of all, how stiff they looked. He wouldn't have been able to use the keys with fingers like those that were too stunned to move. They were red with her blood, with his blood too. Despite the white paint, he could see the flourishing blue and yellow bruises beneath the chipping blood. He felt, but he could not bring himself to do anything about it. He could not feign the same concern as most people. That was what the Maggot's Nest did to everyone, what this job did to your own mind; you begin to stop caring about others, your only concern is the idea coming to life. You are all at once empathetic and apathetic...
Akon took a whiff of his cigarette before pointing out, "Chief, you're getting blood everywhere."
He still didn't turn around, his voice sounded colder than usual in that it gave Akon shivers to hear it directed at him, "Leave it, I'm too busy right now to wash it off."
It was a lie. It was a blatant lie. He didn't seem so busy before when he was hitting Nemu. Besides that, he had seen how the hand had shook and trembled as it was raised up. He was hurting and he wasn't doing anything to stop it. He was prolonging it, hands like that weren't any use to anybody, especially in their line of work.
Shrugging his shoulders, Akon said goodbye and resumed his work, not before changing into a different lab coat. Though the blood made it look all the more professional, he supposed that the chief didn't need any reminders. As much as Akon thought that he should be more protective toward the women and hateful to the father, he found that he could not summon up those feelings. It was easier to feel sorry for them.
Almost in a daze, he wondered what it must've felt like: to not be allowed to love someone and be loved by them, to hurt them because they wanted you to for your own good and reputation, to not be able to cry and talk to someone about it.
They deserved only pity, he thought.
I've just realized that perhaps in an AU, it's easier to imagine Mayuri being able to marry Nemu rather than their own universe. Which I think is really sad. So... tell me what you think, please review in suggestions or critique or send them in a PM.
Plus, I'm not even sure, but my own little mind is telling me that Akon must've been the one to reveal the marriage because he does work on surveillance, he seemingly does have a lot of authority in the SDRI, he also loves Nemu and is envious of Mayuri, and it is often the one who's closest who betrays you. I'm not really confirming it because I'm not really sure, but I would hint that Akon probably let slip to the captains about this marriage and afterwards, he feels guilty about what he's done and tries to atone for it. Here is his atonement.
Epilogue
The next day, everybody tasted something funny in the water and smelled something odd in the air. Then they all fell sick. A few days later, they woke up with virtually no recollection of the previous month or so and everything went to hell for a few hours before they were ordered to just get over it and get back to work.
Akon smiled and sought no words of appreciation from anyone, the selected amnesia was merely marked it off as a joke done by the 11th division. Those brutes believed anything they were told.
It's better to have loved and lost, than to ever have loved at all.
As much as he would like to disagree with that; whenever he saw his Chief smiling at the lieutenant, when he thought that they were alone or that no one was looking, Akon had to smile too.
Pity is powerful, but Love is always stronger.
