You Look So Good in Love
A/N: So I was reading Catching Fire again and listening to some classic George... and this came out of it. We all know if it hadn't been for the bomb, Katniss would have chosen Gale, it was just Collins's way of taking the easy road and making it where Katniss didn't have to choose between them. Although I am Team Peeta, it's obvious she never really loved Peeta, not like he loved her. So this is a songfic I wrote to the King George song "You Look So Good in Love", in Peeta's point of view. This takes place in Catching Fire, after Gale was whipped and is knocked out from drugs; the scene where Katniss is sitting on the stool beside him. Hope you enjoy!
Disclaimer: Suzanne Collins owns Catching Fire and The Hunger Games series, and George Strait owns "You Look So Good in Love".
Oh, how you sparkle,
And oh how you shine.
The blush on your cheeks
Is more than the wine.
I sit the loaves of bread I just pulled out of my oven on the kitchen counter then say a quick hello to Katniss's mother and Prim before walking slowly to the room where Katniss is keeping careful watch over Gale. I can't help but be jealous of him, because I can tell Katniss cares more about him than she ever did about me—although maybe her being bent on keeping me alive in the Games should count for something—and that's why I still try to be nice when it comes to her and Gale. But I can't even explain the feeling that went through me as she told me about the kiss with Gale. I already knew most of our kisses meant absolutely nothing to her, but still, I wish I could be to her what he is. She blushed as she told me, and I only wished I could have that effect on her.
Maybe I shouldn't have tried to save Gale, should have let him get whipped until he died. But of course, I'm not that type of person. I'm too nice, and I would do anything for Katniss, anything to make her happy even if it means killing myself inside.
And he must do somethin'
That I didn't do.
Whatever he's doin'
It looks good on you.
I stand silently in the doorway, watching Katniss as she stares intently at Gale; he's knocked out from the morphling, and she's sitting beside him, holding his hand. I can't see much of her face, but I can see one thing: she's in love. Like she never has been with me, like she never will be. Aside from our tentative friendship, everything else between us is just a farce. No matter what I do, I know she'll never look at me like that. I wonder what exactly Gale did to garner such affection from her.
You look so good in love.
You want him, that's easy to see.
You look so good in love.
I wish you still wanted me.
She doesn't know I'm here. I watch as she begins to touch his face, everywhere. His eyebrows, his cheekbones, his nose, the hollow of his neck. Her fingers come to rest on his lips. She's never looked at me like that before, for real anyway. There was only once where I thought... I might mean something more to her. But watching her now, seeing the wheels turn in her mind as she realizes her feelings for Gale, I know I don't stand a chance. She'll loathe me forever for being forced to marry me, I see that now. And all I ever wanted was for her to love me, to want me like I do her.
He must have stolen some stars from the sky
And gave them to you to wear in your eyes.
I had my chances,
But I set you free.
And now I wonder why I couldn't see
I've seen the stars in her eyes when Gale comes up in a conversation. I don't think she's realized how much she truly loves him until now. I have no competition anywhere. Yeah, right. Gale's the one who has enchanted her; she gets this far off look in her eyes sometimes and I know she's thinking about him. I tried to hold on to her, did whatever I could to make Katniss love me, but now I see I was blind to the fact that there's someone else. All I can do now is set her free. But I can't. Because I'm selfish. Not to mention the fact that we'll all die by Snow's hand...
You look so good in love.
You want him, that's easy to see.
You look so good in love.
I wish you still wanted me.
"I'm so sorry," she whispers, and leans down to kiss him. I don't want to watch anymore. But I am immobilized in the doorway. For a moment I almost hope she sees me watching. But she never looks away from him.
I see Gale's eyelids flutter, then he looks at her; his eyes are glazed over from the drugs. "Hey, Catnip." Catnip. How very endearing.
"Hey, Gale," she says. At least Hawthorne's too drugged to see me in the doorway. Or I guess he only has eyes for her.
"Thought you'd be gone by now," he says.
I can't listen anymore, I'm finally able to move. Simply because I don't want to hear her response. I've never moved so quietly in my life.
Darling, I've wasted a lot of years
Not seeing the real you.
But tonight your beauty is shining through.
And I never took the time to let you know.
So before he takes you away
Please, let me say
She looked the most beautiful I've ever seen her as she looked at him with those gray eyes. Even if, for some reason, she ever does choose me over him—for real, not just for show—I know she'll never look at me like that. Maybe over time, but I doubt it. After all we've been through together, you would think she'd love me as more than a friend. But he already has her heart, has had it for a long time probably. I know I'm going to be hurt so bad, that the pain inside will be excruciating, but if Katniss is happy, it will be worth it and that will make me happy. For a while anyway. Until it hits me again that I've lost her.
I haven't slept in a few days, but I can't sleep now. I sit in front of her fireplace for a while, giving them time, before finally getting the fresh bread I brought out of the kitchen and going back. She's asleep. I watch her a while; she also looks so beautiful while she sleeps.
Finally, I give her shoulder a shake to wake her up. She's still holding on to Gale's hand for dear life.
You look so good in love.
You want him, that's easy to see.
You look so good in love.
I wish you still wanted me.
I try to mask my sadness, my hurt, but I know she sees the sadness when she looks up at me.
"Go on up to bed, Katniss. I'll look after him now," I say, trying to keep my voice neutral. I'm only offering because I love her so much, since I officially hate Gale.
"Peeta. About what I said yesterday, about running—" she starts, but I cut her off.
"I know." I know she'll never run without him. "There's nothing to explain."
"Peeta— " I think she knows that I've realized she's going to choose Gale Hawthorne.
"Just go to bed, okay?"
You look so good in love.
You want him, that's easy to see.
You look so good in love...
By the way, I wish I could say as she slowly stands, stretches, and makes her way out of the room, you look so good in love. I just wish it was with me.