Days came and went. That's how it was all Adrien's life. One day comes after another, and if he's lucky he'll have a nice story by the end of one. Well, "nice" might be a bit optimistic, but at least my life isn't boring? He thought, staring at the door of the Dupain-Cheng bakery.
I am Chat Noir, after all. He took a shaky breath, smelling the pastries from even outside the building. That means I can handle it.
Sure, he wasn't as strong or cunning as Ladybug, and he wasn't as skilled or even determined save when it came to protecting her. He didn't do as much as he should have, he let himself get distracted or get taken advantage of in battle, nearly always to Ladybug's detriment. Stop it, he thought, fighting away the thoughts that both Plagg and Ladybug have told him several times over were poisonous and inaccurate. You're doing what you can. Adrien clenched his jaw as the familiar thought flew through his head like a crazed bird. "What you can" isn't enough.
Adrien was Adrien.
People liked to tell him otherwise, but he knew. No one else did, though, unfortunately. Even the Dupain-Chengs who had all but adopted him. Even Nino, his best friend. For a long time, even Plagg (Though after the first time he transformed, and the suit automatically fit to bind his chest as much as possible, he knew that Plagg had some idea. Still he refused to tell him.). That's why, Adrien figured, this was really his own fault.
Because his dad found out, and the Agreste family name can't be associated with someone like Adrien. Obviously, that would be a travesty and cannot be allowed.
Obviously.
"Olivia?" Mrs. Cheng opened the door to the bakery, looking at Adrien questioningly. "What are you standing out here for? Come in!"
Adrien stood for a few seconds, too shell-shocked to do anything, before obediently stepping across the threshold into the warm building that he had somehow come to associate with family. Not the kind he had, but the idyllic kind he'd seen on television. The kind where the word actually carried a positive connotation. Or even, he guessed, one where it had a meaning at all.
Adrien heard Marinette come thundering down the stairs and through the door to the shop before yelping loudly and rushing back up. Her mother chuckled lightly at her behavior and turned to Adrien, dropping the humor from her eyes to look entirely serious. "Is everything okay?"
Her eyes held the kind of wisdom and love that came with being an experienced, wonderful mother. It made Adrien choke on his own words. No matter how hard he tried, with Mrs. Cheng rubbing his back lightly and guiding him to another room in the back before sitting him down, all he could do was shake his head. Also despite his best efforts, he felt his tears running down his cheeks even before moving out of the main room. Mrs. Cheng didn't say anything, she just hugged him tightly and let him hug her until he could manage to calm down.
"I'm sorry," he mumbled into her shoulder.
"You're fine," she said, "do you want to talk about it?"
"No." He let her go, sat straight in his chair, and brought his knees to his chest, hugging them. Despite his answer, he kept talking. "My dad kicked me out." Adrien kept his eyes focused resolutely on the table, but could feel the subtle tensing in Mrs. Cheng's hand as she continued to try to comfort him. "He told me I have three days before he disowns me completely."
Her voice was controlled and careful, but Adrien still picked up on the trace anger in it. "That's terrible." A pause. Adrien heard some thumping around above him, almost certainly Marinette. God, I hope she doesn't come down here right now. "Are you okay telling me why he'd do that?"
He moved his eyes to Mrs. Cheng's. He felt his heart quicken, but he knew he had to say it. He had to say it and he had to keep saying it no matter what until he found someone who wouldn't stop loving him. Because he'd already lost a family, a small, dysfunctional one, but still one he cared about. He knew he wasn't as strong as Ladybug, but he had to do what he could. "I'm transgender."
Marinette's mother paused. "Does anyone else know?" He shook his head and felt the tears renew themselves when she pulled him back into another hug. "Shh, it's okay. You're okay. We'll always love you." He clapped a hand over his mouth to stifle any sounds he made as he broke down.
Marinette had come downstairs then. She stood at the base of the stairs, watching with concern, until her mother told her to go back to her room. Adrien sucked in a deep breath. "It's okay. I'm sorry for bothering you." He pulled away, trying too hard to put on his best smile. "I should go."
He stood and only managed a single step towards the door before Mrs. Cheng caught his wrist. She gave Marinette a pointed look and only spoke after Marinette had gone back upstairs. "Where are you going?"
"I don't know."
"Then you're staying right here."
"But-"
"No 'but's. You're staying with us." Mrs. Cheng smiled, releasing him and gesturing for him to sit back down. "We'll take care of you."
"Y-you don't have to. I wouldn't want to-"
"Don't be ridiculous. I want to, and I know my husband will agree." Adrien choked up again, unable to properly respond. "But while you are here, Marinette will wonder why. Do you want to tell her? Or should we keep it quiet for now?"
He stared into her eyes. There was no room for argument, no room for stalling. It was advance or abscond, and well, he'd already come this far. "Sh-she should know."
Mrs. Cheng smiled and called Marinette.
"Olivia?" She asked tentatively, stepping carefully down the stairs.
Adrien furiously scrubbed the tears from his eyes. "M-Marinette! Hey."
"W-what happened?" She asked, keeping her distance but reaching up slightly before dropping her hand.
Marinette's mother answered for him after his own attempt failed. "Olivia is going to be staying with us for a while," she said.
"I'm so sorry to intrude," he said immediately in response, seeing Marinette pale.
"My- my dad kicked me out because he found out I'm transgender. He said that if I don't deny it in three days he's going to disown me. I just… I didn't know where else to go."
Unlike her mother's, Marinette's reaction was totally uncontrolled. Adrien was taken aback by how furious she looked. Many emotions crossed her face, confusion, sympathy, but anger was the one that lingered. "He what?!" she exclaimed. "How could he- oh I am so going over there right now and-"
"Marinette," her mother said calmly, "let your father and I handle it."
Marinette argued, but her mother shut her down completely, carefully dismantling every argument Marinette made until she just sighed angrily and sat at the table near Adrien. She examined him curiously. "So, you're transgender?"
Adrien took in a shaky breath. "Yeah."
"So what are your pronouns? Do you, uh, do you have a name you'd rather we call you?"
"Adrien," he said. "My name is Adrien. Um… use he and him, please?"
Marinette nodded, looking determined, and stood. "Well Adrien, let's go get you set up, alright? We'll find a place for you to sleep, get you your toothbrush, and whatever else." She smiled, though her face was red and her words were just a little tense. "Mom has to go back to work."
Adrien woke up the next morning warm in a pile of blankets and breathing in the scent of bread. It was the latter that made him jump up, wondering where he was. Oh, he thought, placing a hand on his chest to feel his racing heartbeat, right.
"Oh, A-Adrien! You're awake." He turned to see Marinette, dressed thankfully (though only in her pajamas), but still drying her hair. She must have just gotten out of the shower. "Y-you can shower in there." She gestured with her head to the room behind her. "Mom will have bakery for us in the breakfast- I mean, breakfast in the bakery b-by the time you're out."
"Oh, thank you."
As she headed towards the stairs up to her room, she called casually over her shoulder. "Oh, and the green towels are yours. And don't worry about using my soap, if you don't mind smelling like me anyway, until we get you your own."
Adrien felt himself flush at the thought. Being a part-time cat, smell became something he had strong associations with, so smelling like her was… not uncomfortable, but it felt strangely intimate, especially given how she said it. He shook his head and got up from the couch, his bed "until we find something better". He grabbed his bag, containing Plagg, and rushed to the bathroom. When he closed the door, he let Plagg out.
Rather than the loud complaining he expected, Plagg just looked at him with his big eyes and glanced towards the door. His ear twitched once and he floated up to perch on Adrien's shoulder. Only after Adrien started the shower did Plagg say anything. "How are you holding up, kid?"
"I've been better," Adrien murmured, stripping to step into the shower (He had long since stopped being embarrassed about nakedness with Plagg).
"You'll get through it. You have people who care about you."
"I know. I'm sorry you're so cooped up now. And I don't have much money, so I can't buy you cheese all the time."
"You being okay is what's most important." Adrien stared at Plagg, who shrugged and stretched. "Well I'm going to make the most of being out. Don't hurry with your shower."
Adrien didn't hurry. Actually, he took a lot longer than usual. Partly because he had no idea how the temperature worked, so he spent a good few minutes just moving things, putting his hand under the water, trying something else, and testing the water again. Once he finally did set it so that it wasn't scalding (seriously, how did Marinette stand it?), things went relatively smoothly but for Plagg's sake, since he didn't know when the next time he could come out would be, he didn't rush at all. There was plenty of time before school.
Things were strangely okay for him. In a twisted, nebulous sort of way, it almost felt more like a sleepover than anything else. It hadn't really sunk in yet that he might never see his old room again, or that he was essentially broke and homeless. Shit. I am so unbelievably screwed.
His eyes were red again when he left the bathroom. If Marinette noticed, she didn't say anything.
The next day, Adrien made a choice. He had gotten up early and watched as Marinette's father hummed and danced a little as he set about making some croissants for their breakfast before school.
"Can I help?" Adrien asked quietly.
Mr. Dupain turned to look at him. "You want to learn how to bake?"
Adrien gulped with such a large man's gaze on him so intently. "Uh, yes sir. I do."
Marinette's father laughed. "Well then get over here!"
That was the day, the moment, that Adrien made his choice. If Marinette and her parents all could accept him into their family so readily, if he had all of them supporting him and he could learn to work, outside of modeling, and sustain himself, and someday pay back the Dupain-Chengs for their kindness, he didn't need to go back to his father. He reminded himself that he was Chat Noir, and he was Adrien. He wasn't Olivia, and he wouldn't ever be her. That's simply the way it was.
Nonetheless, that third day was tense for him. He kept thinking about how it was his last chance, how after that day ended he was stuck. And he knew he couldn't live off of Marinette's family forever. He'd do what he could to help out at the bakery, but that wasn't nearly enough for what they did for him.
When the sun set on the third day, Adrien wasn't sure what he was, but he knew for a fact that he was not an "Agreste".
It took two weeks before Natalie called him. It took him less than a second to ignore it. He had gotten into a kind of schedule again. He'd wake up and get ready early, so he could help Marinette's father in the bakery for thirty minutes or so while Marinette herself was still getting ready before they headed off to school together. At first, they got all sorts of questions, mostly from Nino and Alya, as to why they always arrived at school together every day. Adrien still didn't really answer them, nor did Marinette, since she didn't want to out him, so aside from an increasingly concerned Nino and an increasingly frustrated Alya, school didn't change much overall. It was hard, but Adrien didn't want anyone to worry needlessly over him. He was already imposing on Marinette and her family. And after two weeks, he had started to get used to it.
He wasn't too big of a spender, despite his riches. Aside from mountains of cheese for Plagg, he tended to only get what he needed or the occasional game or book he just had to have (though he will admit there was a time when he spent like Chloe on holiday. A lot of the more… opulent furnishings in his old room were from that period.). Something didn't really sit right with him to spend all his father's money, and since he had an income from modeling anyway he tried to only spend what he earned himself. That being said, being estranged from his father did mean he was now unemployed, but he could handle it. He was helping out around the bakery after school as a kind of informal way of paying back the Dupain-Chengs. He told them that he just enjoyed helping, which he did. Even if he wasn't in debt to them, he'd be glad to help, but if they knew that was part of the reason, Adrien figured they'd forbid it. They're too generous with me.
After a second attempt at calling, Adrien received a text message instead.
Natalie: Olivia, your father would like to arrange a meeting with you.
Natalie: Forgive me. *Adrien.
Adrien let himself stew on that information for a few minutes before responding.
Adrien: I thought he didn't want anything to do with me. Or did he forget what "disown" means?
Natalie: He realized he was acting rashly, and would like to attempt to make amends.
Adrien: "Rashly"
He scoffed, placing his phone face down on the desk and looking up to watch Marinette tap away at her controller to dominate whatever game she had decided to play that day. Rashly is an understatement. He kicked me out! And now he wants me to just come right back to him?! I can't believe him. I should just ignore it, but… I can't live off Marinette's family forever. I owe it to them to at least try, right? Then I can get off their backs, let them get back to their lives.
"What's up Adrien?" Marinette looked over at him, furrowing her brow slightly.
He sighed and picked up his phone again. "Apparently, my dad wants to 'arrange a meeting' with me." He looked at the lone message that Natalie sent him in reply.
Natalie: We miss you.
"You don't look happy about that."
"Well when he said he was disowning me, I couldn't help but take it to heart, you know?"
Marinette paused the game and moved to sit next to him. "Then tell him to choke on one of his dumb fashion-forward ascots." Adrien just felt his jaw drop. He couldn't even think to do anything but stare at Marinette, who pointed her nose to the sky and grinned conspiratorially. "He made a big mistake when he did that."
"When he made the ascots?"
"Well, yes, but I meant when he disowned you."
"I gave him one of those ascots, you know," Adrien whined playfully.
Marinette rolled her eyes. "Anyway, and you have a family right here, if you don't want to, you definitely shouldn't go back." She leaned close to him, looking down at his phone. "What did he say?"
"Huh? Oh, he didn't say anything. Natalie just said he wanted a meeting with me."
"He disowns you and then can't even call you himself when he wants to talk to you again? Oh there's no way you're going back to that man. I forbid it. If you even try I will drag you back here and stuff you so full of macaroons that you won't be able to leave again. If he wants to talk to you, let him talk to you, not send his assistant to do it."
"You're… very passionate about this."
"Of course I am! He obviously hasn't realized how terrible of a mistake he made if he won't even call you himself. I'm not sending you back to the same place you came from." She folded her arms stubbornly and closed her eyes.
Which was probably a good thing, given how Adrien's cheeks heated up and his eyes watered. He glanced back at the phone and gulped down the lump in his throat. No, they want me here. I should stay if it's better here than there.
Adrien: I miss you too, Natalie, but dad can't just expect me to come back the moment he realizes what he did. I'm happier here.
Natalie: I'm glad that you're happy. Please think about it, though.
He stood by his decision. If his father wanted to disown him, he shouldn't expect any less in return. Still, Adrien knew it'd eat away at him. "I should tell your parents about this, see what they think."
Marinette nodded and backed away so he could stand and head downstairs.
Adrien fell into step with Marinette's father in the kitchen quickly and without any more than an enthusiastic greeting. He kept quiet for a few minutes, then hummed along with the tune that Mr. Dupain was whistling, and finally set down the bowl he was carrying and spoke. "Mr. Dupain?"
"Yes, Adrien?"
"My dad wants to meet with me."
His eyebrows rose and his lips sealed shut as he looked carefully at Adrien. "Do you want to meet with him?"
"Well…" Adrien picked up the bowl again and started to whisk the contents together. He's my father. "Yes." But he disowned me, he lost the right to pretend to care. Right? "No. I don't know." Adrien shook his head. "What should I do?"
There was a deep rumbling from beside him as Mr. Dupain hummed in thought. "I assume you've already talked to Marinette about this?"
"She just got angry that he would even try to contact me again. She said that at least until he calls me himself, instead of having Natalie do it, I'm forbidden from going."
"That sounds like her. Well Adrien, she has a point." Mr. Dupain shrugged. "Your father did something absolutely terrible, and contacting you through his assistant isn't a good start at fixing it." I know it isn't. Still, I… "But it is a start. If he wants to meet with you, then he knows that he messed up. That's something, at least."
Adrien sighed. "I know I shouldn't go back. Marinette's totally right, as usual, but he's still… he's still my dad, you know?"
"I know, son. It's up to you. We can't tell you what to do, even if Marinette tries."
Adrien smiled. He always felt just a little warmer when Marinette's father called him "son". "But what do you think, though?" he asked.
"I think you should think carefully. Your father might not always know how to show it, but he does care about you." Adrien made a noncommittal noise as he considered. "And I think that if any father-child relationship is salvageable, you should give it your best shot."
Too bad my best has never been enough. For him especially. "I understand. Thank you."
"And you're always welcome here, even if you do move back there."
Marinette stopped stuttering around me, finally. I guess since I'm not a model anymore I'm not so intimidating to an aspiring designer. Or maybe it's just proximity. Either way, I'm glad. She had, relatively slowly, been relaxing around him, which made him feel slightly less awful about being her unexpected roommate since all traces of "totally flipping out and sprinting in the opposite direction" when she saw him had vanished. She had gotten fairly good about it fairly quickly, probably because she was more concerned with his well-being than with whatever caused her reactions, but it still remained and Adrien could tell that she was always tense.
When he tried to talk to her parents about it (and leave, because the last thing he wanted was to bother Marinette), they just laughed at him and told him not to worry about it. Naturally, that was about as helpful as a bullet-riddled spork, so when it all seemed to pass on its own Adrien was immensely relieved.
But after a few days, Marinette stopped running away from him. Another few days and she could carry conversations with him, and three weeks later there wasn't much of a hint that she was ever any shyer around him than anyone else. Adrien spent most of his free time, if he wasn't helping in the bakery, just hanging out with Marinette. Though he had seen elements of her personality before, usually if there was trouble or she didn't know he was there, he really got the chance to get to know her. He loved how focused she could get, how skilled she was at what she did, and especially how much she fought for what she believed in. Marinette was fearless when it came to it, even shouting that his father, Gabriel Agreste, needed to "fight her".
Nino for him was a calm, cool stone. A foundation really. Nino supported him and made him laugh when he felt like crumbling. Nino would always be integral to who Adrien was. He taught Adrien that people can be different and still be loved totally, that he doesn't have to be what his father dictated to be happy.
Marinette though, Marinette taught him to reach out and grab what he wanted. Marinette taught him passion and the drive to work for that passion. Adrien loved his extracurriculars, but even those he still had to go through the entire process of asking his father's permission. He had never just wanted to do something and did it for no other reason than that. He doubted his father would approve of him baking, Well, that's not true. Girls in the kitchen, am I right? Still it's just such a domestic thing, not something to advertise really. It's not classical, it's not a sport. He can't string me up in front of a crowd and proudly declare, "He's a pretty decent cook". That's what I meant, I guess, yeah. And regardless of what his father would think, it was the first hobby he'd taken up that wasn't carefully considered for him, and he loved doing it. He loved dancing like a dork and singing show tunes with Mr. Dupain as they worked together, or even when he'd need to be guided. Okay, maybe I just really like Marinette's dad, but I like baking too! He sighed to himself.
Ladybug smells like pastries a lot. I wonder if she likes to bake. I wonder if I can ever even tell her… No, it's too personal. Being transgender, all the stuff with moving in with Marinette, she wouldn't want to hear about that. Besides, I've kind of gotten through things. Mostly. I don't need to worry her with my petty issues.
As Marinette became more comfortable with him, he became more comfortable with her, and by extension, her parents. It really didn't take long at all for him to learn that they were people he could go to when he was upset or confused by anything, but it was only after a little bit of time, after he was more comfortable in the house and more comfortable with Marinette, that he started talking to them about anything other than what was relevant to his situation with his father. Even then he didn't talk much about his gender.
Things were improving, if nothing else. Adrien felt less like a free-loader and more like a guest. Recently, he had even begun to feel more like part of the family than even that. He still didn't tell anyone what happened or why, but having Marinette know and be there next to him at school, just knowing that she had his back, was a huge relief. He felt okay.
And then his father called.
Adrien let it ring a few times, looked over at Marinette. Nino looked over his shoulder at the phone, but Adrien just tilted it slightly in Marinette's direction so she could see. She caught her breath and nodded. "Go ahead, we'll give you some privacy. Come on, guys."
She gave him an encouraging smile and pulled Nino and Alya away across the courtyard, sending concerned glances back at him as she walked.
He answered the phone. "Hello?"
"Olivia." There was some rustling on his father's side of the call, and his voice sounded breathy, not quite as stoic as usual. He almost sounded surprised.
"What do you want?" Adrien tried not to sound bitter, mostly because he knew he was in public and getting emotional wouldn't be smart in the school courtyard.
"Olivia, come home and let's talk about this."
Adrien scoffed. "Why would I want to talk to you? Actually, why would you want to talk to me? I thought you knew what 'disown' meant when you told me to get out of your house."
"Be sensible."
"What isn't sensible here is that you disowned your own son. The only other unbelievable thing is that you think I even want to see you after that."
"You're angry."
"Oh you're damn right I'm angry." Adrien decided to pout rather than yell, just to spare himself from attracting everyone's attention. "After what you did, if you expect anything else then you're the one who's not sensible."
There was silence on the line for a while. Adrien looked out to Marinette, but she was talking to Alya and Nino with her back to him. "…You've made it clear that you have no interest in talking. I'll stop taking your time then. Goodbye."
"Bye." Adrien hung up quickly, before either of them could change their minds and especially before his father could hang up on him.
He sighed, sinking down onto the stairs and dropping his head into his hands. It's easier to talk to him like that when it's over the phone. I'm not sure I'd be brave enough in person.
With great effort, he stood and started towards his friends. They had been hanging out after school, waiting for Alya and Nino to get picked up, but Adrien really just wanted to be someplace private at that moment.
"Are you okay, buddy?" Nino asked as he approached.
Adrien just sighed again and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Not really." He looked up again after feeling Nino's hand on his shoulder. "Hey Marinette?"
"Yeah?"
"Can we go home now?"
"Of course." She looked over to their friends. "Sorry guys, we're going to go."
"Wait, hold up," Alya said. "What do you mean? Why do you need to ask Marinette to go home?" She narrowed her eyes at Adrien. "And why do you have to go together?"
Ah, shit. "It's not a big deal," Adrien said, kicking the ground lightly. "Just some personal stuff. Don't worry about it."
Marinette sent him a look that clearly told him it was very much not "not a big deal", but she just shrugged to Alya. "More importantly," Nino said, "girl you're upset because your dad called. Do you really want to go home right away?"
Oh god, I'm an idiot. "Nino's right," Marinette said. "Why don't you come over instead?" Adrien picked up on the hints and thanked every god that may have existed that Marinette was a quicker thinker than he apparently was.
"I'd love that. Thanks Marinette."
The two made their getaway before they could be interrogated further. "Wow," she said once they left the campus, "smooth."
"I wasn't thinking. Sorry."
"It's fine. Maybe you should tell them, though? We wouldn't have to be so cloak and dagger about it then. And maybe they'll stop thinking we're secretly dating."
Adrien felt his breath involuntarily hitch. "Sorry, they what?"
Marinette smirked, though her face was red (about as red as his own). "They think we're dating behind their backs, and doing a terrible job of hiding it."
"Why would they think that?"
He just received a flat look. "Adrien we come to school together every day."
"So?"
"We also hang out in most of our free time, and leave school together."
"They don't know that though! We usually wait until they leave before we do."
"We don't wait until the entire school is empty, Adrien, and Alya has spies everywhere. Trust me, she knows."
"O-oh. I'm sorry." He hung his head, staring at the sidewalk.
"Sorry? Why are you sorry?"
"Well Alya's bugging you about us, and if people think we're dating then- I mean if there was someone you liked, they'd- uh…"
"I think I get it." Adrien could imagine the blush on her cheeks rivalled his, but he stubbornly refused to look. I'm just so much trouble for her. "Don't worry about it. There's no one I'd rather- I mean, it won't mess anything up for me, is all I'm saying. And Alya wouldn't be my best friend if I couldn't handle her."
Adrien breathed out a sigh. Thank god.
Can I be civil? With him, it's kind of a hit or miss at this point. I know he'll be perfectly refined and infuriatingly calm. If I can manage the same thing, then maybe I should meet with him. Just so we don't end on the note we did. But I'm so scared to go back, too.
"Adrien? Marinette told me that your father called?"
"Mrs. Cheng." He smiled, letting himself breathe out some of the tension in his shoulders. "Yes ma'am, he did. He… wanted me to go back to talk."
"Again? He must really want to talk to you."
Adrien gripped his cup of tea carefully and took a sip. "I suppose."
"Do you still not want to talk to him?"
"Honestly?" Adrien leaned back in his chair and stared at the ceiling. "I don't think he deserves to have me go back. And I honestly don't think I deserve to have to listen to him again. But at the same time I'm curious to know what he has to say. He called me himself, that's strange, normally Natalie would do it. And… well he's still my dad. Is it bad that I want to see him again?"
"Not at all, sweetheart."
"I'm just not sure that even if I do go back, I'll be able to keep it together."
"Would you like us to come with you?"
Adrien shot upright, staring intently at her. "You'd do that?"
"Of course."
Adrien took a deep breath. "Thank you."
"You don't need to thank us. We'll always be here to support you." She gave him a hug and moved away to go back to work, or whatever she had to do at the time.
Adrien took out his phone and stared at it for a while. How should I do it though? I kind of told him off when he called me. He had almost finished his tea when the idea came to him. I can't let him have the upper hand. He always uses those dumb power plays. If he's serious about this, then I'm going to show him he can't control me anymore. He felt a tug at the edge of his lips, curling them into an uncertain smirk. That's right. I have to beat him at his own game, and that starts from the moment I contact him.
He unlocked his phone and stared for a moment at his father's contact, thought for another minute, and opened the text conversation with Natalie.
Adrien: Excuse me, Natalie, when is the next time my father is free?
Natalie: Sunday, at 4. Do you want me to schedule a meeting?
Adrien: No thank you, I want to ask him myself.
Natalie: Very well.
He sighed, finishing his tea before his phone vibrated one more time.
Natalie: It's good to hear from you.
He sucked in his breath and navigated through the phone to his father's contact. He frowned, and looked up again. "Mrs. Cheng?" he called.
"Yes?"
"Could I arrange the meeting with my father to happen here?"
Mrs. Cheng popped her head back into the room and smiled at him. "I think that's a wonderful idea."
He grinned and opened up a text conversation.
Adrien: I'll meet you at the Dupain-Cheng Bakery at four this Sunday. It's at 12 Gotlib Street. Confirm with me if you're still interested.
I set the date and time, and the location. If he really wants to make up with me, this is the start. And okay, maybe it just feels good to use his own power tactics against him.
"Adrien!" Marinette's voice made him look at the stairs leading to her room. "Could you come help me with this?"
He sighed with a smile, knowing that she was working on some new fashion project. Undoubtedly she'd be measuring him and making him hold fabric and possibly even making him try on some clothes. He loved it, more for her passion and enthusiasm than any of his own.
As he made his way up, after putting the cup away, he felt his phone vibrate and looked at the message from his father reading simply "I'll be there".
Just stay calm, stay smart, stay focused. You'll be fine. Adrien frowned and fiddled with the buttons on his shirt. He was dressed fairly nicely, since he knew his father would be in his permanent suit, but he still set the precedent for being more casual by forgoing the tie and leaving his dark grey button-up shirt unbuttoned at the top. Unlike his father, if they were actually in the shop portion of the bakery, he wouldn't have seemed all that out of place. Which was exactly the look he was going for. He wanted his father to understand that what they were going to do wasn't business.
Marinette sat with him until her parents came into the room with Gabriel Agreste just behind. When they came in, she stood, placed a hand on his shoulder, and passed them to watch the bakery so that both of her parents could sit in on the conversation. She was pretty adamant at first about being there herself, but her parents convinced her that that way was for the best. While Adrien would have loved to have her there as well, he had to agree that it was best that both adults were there rather than one.
"You can sit here," Mr. Dupain said, pulling out a chair, "across from Adrien." When Adrien saw his father's jaw tighten, he couldn't help but think, Wow, Mari's parents are good. Establish from the start that I'm going by Adrien here, nice.
Things were tense and quiet while they just sat there. Marinette's mother started making some tea and asked if his father would like any and how he wanted it, but until she had brought the tray to the table, no one spoke any more than that.
Once Mrs. Cheng had taken her seat, to Adrien's left, putting him between her and her husband, she calmly took a sip of her tea and arched an eyebrow at his father. "You wanted to talk to Adrien, so say what you wanted to say."
"Very well." Adrien's father trained his gaze on Mr. and Mrs. Dupain-Cheng in turn first. "Firstly, I would like to thank you both for taking care of my daughter."
"Son," Marinette's mother said sharply, "and we were only treating him as any parent should."
Oh damn. Gabriel cleared his throat, not letting any reaction to her words show, and focused on Adrien. "Olivia, I have behaved rashly and in a… somewhat juvenile fashion." It's not much but god how hard is it for him to say that? "I should not have treated you as I did. I hope you can come to forgive me."
Adrien felt Marinette's father's hand clap him on the back, which steeled his resolve. He didn't want to be difficult, but even despite the apology there was something that, after living with the Dupain-Chengs, he couldn't stand hearing from the people who were supposed to be his family. "Maybe if you apologized to someone who actually exists, they'd be able to respond."
Gabriel's jaw tightened, but he didn't show any other sign of what he was feeling. "I believe I did."
"I'm not Olivia."
"Don't be ridiculous. That is your name."
"My name is Adrien"
"That is not-"
"Mr. Agreste," Mrs. Cheng said, cutting him off. "If you can't even call your son by his own name, then I don't see what we're accomplishing here."
"She is not a boy."
"He is what he says he is. Look, Mr. Agreste." She smiled sweetly at him as she spoke. "Whether you believe that a person can be transgender or not, is it not impolite to refer to people by names they don't wish to be called? Or by pronouns they don't wish to use? Adrien has asked you to call him Adrien, and to not do so would be very disrespectful, don't you think so?" Have I ever mentioned how much I love you? Adrien thought as he stared at Marinette's mother. Oh god, I'm not sure anyone has ever talked to my dad that way.
Gabriel raised one eyebrow carefully, examining her. "You have… a point."
They all fell into an uneasy silence. "Is that it?" Adrien asked.
"Yes. I simply wished to apologize, and to let you know that you are welcome home."
"Warm welcome," Adrien muttered. He stood. "Well then, if that's all, I'm sure you're very busy. I wouldn't want to keep you."
Adrien thought he saw an odd expression cross his father's face as he passed by, but he just pushed through his urge to hesitate and took the stairs down to the bakery, where he washed his hands before falling into place beside Marinette, who was preoccupied by taking an order (which he went ahead and started to assemble, just putting pastries in a box) and couldn't immediately question him.
Well that was… better than expected? I probably just shouldn't have agreed to it. I'm glad he apologized and everything, but I really had nothing to say to him. And I really shouldn't have taken off like that. He glanced toward the stairs. No one had yet come down, so he figured the adults were still talking. But I just… really don't have anything to say to him. At least we didn't start yelling.
The adults came downstairs about ten minutes later. Adrien had quietly told Marinette what happened and he was wiping the counter when his father passed by. He looked up and got a nod and nothing more. He wasn't quite sure if he was glad for that.
He just went back to what he was doing. At least until the akuma attacked.
When he heard the screaming, Adrien didn't think twice about running out the front door to see what was going on. He just ran, and when he saw the black energy flying towards a woman on the street, he grabbed her wrist and yanked her out of its path.
He put his hands on her shoulders, asking if she was okay, and scanned the street for the akuma.
When he saw The Hanged Man, his own father, he felt his chest constrict. He had trouble breathing. My dad became an akuma? But… He quickly ordered the woman to hurry inside the closest building, and ducked away before his father saw him. It must have actually upset him, even if he didn't let it show. He really does feel bad about what he did.
Adrien rubbed his face, trying to focus, and called Plagg to transform him.
"Ladybug!" He was glad to see his partner had already arrived when he came out again.
"Chat Noir!" She rushed to his side, using her yo-yo as a shield as she ran.
"Any ideas, My Lady?"
"Only that I think I know who he is." Chat Noir choked out a small noise in response. "I think he's Gabriel Agreste."
I mean, I know that, but why would she? "That was quick."
Ladybug frowned, hesitated. "He just had something painful happen." I know. It's my fault. If I'd just sat and listened and talked a while longer. If I just wasn't so harsh. "Chat! What's wrong?"
He shook his head. "Nothing, My Lady. Let's just go save him."
"Right, come on."
The two leapt in sync, each taking the cues from the other and working together as best as they could. The Hanged Man was one of the tougher akuma recently, or maybe it was because both Chat Noir and Ladybug seemed a little bit put off by him. Chat couldn't help but wonder who Ladybug was and how she knew what was happening with his father. And if she knew it was his fault.
The Hanged Man was a looming presence, just like Gabriel Agreste was. They all fought in relative silence for a long time until, tired out and heaving for breath, Chat Noir found himself with The Hanged Man standing over him. Ladybug was still recovering from the large blow she had taken just after his, and was on the ground some distance away, no help.
"You remind me of my son." The Hanged Man said monotonously. Chat felt what must have been his heart breaking. "He doesn't like me. I ruined everything with him. I wish I could express to him how much I regret what I have done."
"Have," Chat Noir wheezed, still caressing his torso, "have you tried?"
"Yes." The Hanged Man showed no emotion, and just took a single step closer, and then another as he kept speaking. "But I managed to mess up that as well." Chat Noir backed up into a wall. "My son is a strong and capable young man. He is intelligent and kind. I am proud of him, but he has no idea. He believes that I hate him as much as he hates me."
"W-why are you telling me this?"
The Hanged Man examined him carefully. His face was blank, as always, and when he spoke it was without any significant intonation. Still, it made Chat Noir weak at the knees. "You remind me of him. I never told him how much I love him, and now he'll never believe me if I do."
"I think he knows already." Chat kicked The Hanged Man as hard as he could in the chest and reached for the ascot at the akuma's neck as he sprinted past, to free himself from the wall. The Hanged Man was too fast, however, and side-stepped him in time. Chat hurried over to Ladybug instead, helping her to her feet.
She looked at him curiously. "You're crying." She said simply, reaching up and gently wiping at his mask.
"Sorry."
"Let's save him. We can talk about it later if you want, okay?"
Chat Noir nodded, sniffed, and wiped at his eyes himself. "Sorry," He repeated, "let's do it."
It was a long and difficult fight, one that Chat knew would leave him sore even after he transformed back, but eventually, they managed to snag the ascot (the one that, Chat Noir belatedly realized, was the one that he himself had given to his father as a Christmas gift years before) and release the akuma. After the butterfly had been cleansed and released, he stood numbly watching as his father reappeared on the ground, several hours' worth of memory missing and wondering how he had gotten where he was.
Ladybug silently wrapped an arm around his waist and guided his hands around her neck. She threw her yo-yo and carried them both off to a nearby building, tall enough that no one would see them. "Chat, what's wrong?" She knelt in front of him when he sat down and buried his head in his knees.
She gently pulled him open, so he could see her and she could see him. "What's wrong, Kitten?"
That's the first time he's ever told me he loved me.
"Chat, talk to me." She wiped again just below his eye.
The thought that I don't like him was enough to make him get akumatized.
"Shh, don't cry."
He wore the ascot I gave him years ago. And I didn't even notice.
Ladybug hugged him tight, and her whispers were only punctuated by Chat's quiet sobs and the beeping of both their miraculous. Her grip slackened as she hesitated. He hugged her tighter. "Please don't go," he whispered. "I'm so sorry. I'll- keep my eyes closed- wear a blindfold- I don't care just please don't leave me alone."
He wasn't crying because his father wasn't as bad as he thought. No, his father did terrible things. He controlled Adrien's life, never gave any sort of reinforcement, and obstinately fought Adrien any time he even tried to bring out something entirely him instead of just what he was ordered. And it all culminated in the worst transgression of all, he disowned Adrien.
So he wasn't crying because he suddenly learned that his father was secretly a decent person all along. He wasn't. He was crying because despite that, his father tried his best.
And it wasn't enough.
"It's never enough," he mumbled. "God, why can't I ever do anything right?" Everything was just a huge spiral of bad decision after bad decision
"You're doing fine, Kitten," Ladybug murmured into his ear. When the hand in his hair suddenly stopped being gloved, Chat's eyes were already closed. He screwed them shut as tight as he could anyway.
He could feel Ladybug's racing heartbeat against his chest as he held her tightly. "I'm sorry. I won't look."
"I know you won't." He felt his own transformation end, and he buried his head in the crook of Ladybug's neck. "U-uh…" she said, a moment after.
He knew she didn't look, so the only other thing that would shock her was the fact that she now had breasts being pressed against her instead of the relatively flat frame his suit allowed. "I'm so, so sorry, Ladybug. I just keep screwing everything up."
He tried to let her go, but she pulled his closer, if it was possible. "No you aren't. You're fine. I love you, and that's not going to change, Tomcat."
He almost laughed. "Tomcat". That's a new one.
Adrien had a long conversation with Marinette and her parents the next day. He told them everything. Not about Chat Noir, but everything he felt. He told them about how he felt like an actor on a stage, being forced to play the role of Olivia when she had long since lost her welcome in the theater. He told them about how he was always so scared of being imperfect, because he had to be the absolute best he could be in a vain attempt to please his father. He told them about his frustrations with how he could never seem to get any kind of approval. If he did well, it was expected, and if he did wrong, he was scolded.
He even told them about how much he loved working at the bakery, about how safe and welcome he felt when he walked into their home ("Our home", they corrected him). He told them about his fears that he was exploiting them, and how terrified he was of taking advantage of these people he loved. He told them about how even though their home was so much more lively than his old one, it was the first place he felt comfortable enough to really relax.
He told them about how much it meant to him that they never questioned him, and immediately started calling him Adrien when he asked, and how careful they, especially Marinette, are to still use the wrong name and pronouns in public so that he could come out when he was ready. He told them how much he loved them all, if love was quantifiable it'd be more than all the oceans and all the skies and probably everything else in the universe too. He told them about his fears of coming out even to Nino and Alya, even though he knew it was dumb to feel scared in that situation.
And he told them about how he had no idea what he was supposed to do.
Unanimously, they told him to stay right where he is.
"If you're happier here than you are with your father then here is right where you'll stay," Mrs. Cheng told him.
"We didn't intend to have a second kid, but we don't love you any less because of that," Mr. Dupain joked.
Marinette just took his hand and smiled. "You're an okay roommate," She said, "I've had better. But you're not dreadful." He stuck his tongue out at her. She returned the gesture, giggling. "I'm kidding, of course." She pulled him into a hug and left it at that.
A few minutes later, after a lot of joking and laughing, Adrien called his father.
"O- Adrien?" The man's voice through the phone sounded confused, maybe just a tiny bit hopeful, but it was too masked by the façade of stoicism that Adrien couldn't be totally sure.
"Dad," he said, "I've decided."
"Did you?"
"I'm staying with the Dupain-Cheng family."
There was a long pause. "I see. I understand."
"But if it's okay, I'd like to come back every once in a while. I don't want to cut you out."
There was a loud exhalation on his father's side of the call. "That's more than okay. Thank you. I'll try to be a better father."
"I know. Dad, I want us to be okay. And I think part of that is that I need to live here. If I went back, we'd just fall into old habits and neither of us would have learned anything."
"I understand."
"I still love you."
"… I love you too, Adrien."