Disclaimer: I don't own anything to do with General Hospital.
A/N: SPOILER: Scott Clifton has not renewed his contract. He will probably be gone by the end of the summer. I am having a really hard time dealing with this. I don't imagine many people will like this story. I don't even know how I feel about it. It's horribly depressing. There is no happy ending. It's just what it is. My sense of hopelessness I suppose, but I needed to write it for cathartic purposes. I just can't accept that Dilu is really over. I just can't. So for those of you who do read this, thank you.
Lost
Lulu stared at the phone that she had just slammed down on the receiver. She felt physically ill, alone and terrified. She couldn't gather the energy to believe or accept what she'd just heard. Dillon, the man she loved, the man that loved her, was in General Hospital's ICU fighting for his life from a stray bullet that had pierced his temple and entered his brain. His chances for survival were slim to none and Lulu refused to believe that she would lose him before he knew just how much she loved him.
She forced herself out of the chair and started running. She reached the hospital in record time. She barely took a breath when she stopped to ask the nurse for directions.
Now she stood in front of his room. She stared at the tube that was shoved down his throat and all of the other tubes that he was buried beneath. His hair was gone and replaced with a white bandage wrapped tightly around his head. She inhaled deeply before pushing open the door. Tracy acknowledged Lulu with a nod but no words were spoken between the two women while Tracy stood up to give Lulu a moment alone.
As the door clicked shut, Lulu's gaze fell to Dillon's hand. She reached for it and held it inside of both of hers. "Please don't leave me," she begged. "I need you. I love you."
He lay silent in his coma, unaffected by Lulu's declaration of love. She stroked her hand up and down his arm, praying to God that he would be okay.
Eventually her prayers stopped and she fell apart. She dropped her face into his lap and cried. She had never cried harder in her entire life and she realized that she didn't think she ever would again. Time suddenly began to bleed together. She couldn't leave him or face the reality that he was gone.
Over the next few weeks Lulu and Tracy remained by Dillon's side. Then it happened. One day his heart rate became erratic and then a loud, screeching sound alerted everyone his heart had stopped beating. Nothing could be done, no matter how many times they used the defibrillator. He was gone.
Lulu felt lost in a shell of her former self. She couldn't eat, nor sleep. She pushed everyone away and her life literally fell to pieces. She left Port Charles and tried to escape the void in her heart that held her, clutching at her heart like a paralyzing poison. Some days she didn't get out of bed. Other days she felt as though she would suffocate. Her nights were filled with the nightmares of what could have been, especially had she never had the abortion.
Time did nothing to ease her pain. She could not escape her grief. It consumed her and one night she just couldn't take it anymore. She lifted the razor blade to the tender pale, white flesh on her wrists. She cut into the skin and watched the crimson blood flow across the white linoleum. As her blood slipped away, she felt all energy dissipate from her body and then she too slipped away from the world that had done nothing but beat her down.