A/N: This started off as a tag to 7x08, it sort of got sidetracked along the way.
It wasn't a problem easily fixed. And they both knew it.
For Jane, Lisbon's safety and well-being would always be his top priority. Even if she resented him for it.
For Lisbon, well... there was the obvious problem of Jane's actions preventing her from doing her job as a cop. But if she were really honest with herself, the roots of this whole issue ran way deeper than that. Jane was a master manipulator. Bending people to his will came as easily to him as breathing. People he manipulated were sometimes not even aware of what he had done to them. And she hated it. She hated feeling as if she were just another mark, being controlled by a master puppeteer. She hated not being in control of her life.
Even if she understood the motivations behind Jane's actions.
She hated herself even more for that.
Here was a man suffering from the trauma of losing his loved ones once. Petrified that he would lose the woman he loved yet again. And she was mad at him for protecting her. For protecting himself from the consequent pain that would surely ensue should she die.
And yet she couldn't find it in her to give in to him. To leave her line of work which put her in constant danger.
No. She couldn't do that for the man she loved. It was almost as if she were being selfish.
But was it really being selfish to try to remain in control of your life? To maintain your identity? To avoid simply becoming Patrick Jane's girlfriend?
Wasn't he the selfish one? Wanting to control her for his own sanity?
It really wasn't a problem easily solved. Just thinking about it gave Lisbon a headache.
So Lisbon stewed silently the entire night after the case, ignoring the palpable tension in the car as she drove back to her place (she didn't bother asking Jane if he wanted to go back to the airstream. He could jolly well take a cab back if he wasn't comfortable), and the awkwardness as Jane watched her get ready for bed, not quite knowing what to do with himself. He eventually decided on the couch. Clever man.
xoxo
Jane woke her up the next morning, coffee in hand. She sat up and took the coffee blearily, struggling to figure out why she was more tired than usual. And then it all came back to her. What Jane had done, what she had felt.
Lifting her head to glare angrily at Jane, she was taken aback to be greeted by such forlornness.
'I'm sorry Lisbon. I'm sorry for making you angry. I never... I never wanted to hurt you again.'
Jane said morosely.
In that moment, any anger she felt dissolved.
All she was left feeling was an extreme sense of tiredness.
Placing her coffee cup down, Lisbon took Jane's hand, squeezing it gently.
Jane looked up and their gazes locked.
'I know,' she said.
The couple sat in bed for a moment, hands linked, eyes locked. Reconnecting after the pain and hurt of the previous day.
xoxo
Yet, things did not quite go back to normal. There were issues that needed to be ironed out. Issues that could not simply be ignored. They continued to discuss it, trying to work it out, albeit without the full force of emotions that had plagued that awful night.
This continued for three weeks until the Anderson case.
It started off as a fairly normal day. The team caught a case involving the death of Thomas Anderson, a final year computing student at a state university. Anderson had been found in a secluded area on campus by an early morning jogger, with multiple shot wounds.
'ME says time of death was in the early hours of the morning.' Cho said.
'Hm...' Jane said as he crouched down to examine the body closer.
'Jane? Thoughts?' Lisbon prompted.
'This guy was meeting someone he knew. He was prepared for the meeting. Look how he's warmly wrapped.'
'A clandestine affair maybe?' Vega said.
'Unlikely. The guy's in sweats and his shirt has a hole in it. I mean seriously! Who dresses like that for a clandestine affair?' Jane said incredulously.
'Okay so no affair. Maybe it was something illegal. Some disagreement occurred and he got shot.' Lisbon said.
'Maybe,' Jane shrugged.
'Anderson's got multiple shot wounds. So either this was very personal or it was done by someone who wasn't very experienced with a gun.' Vega said.
'I'm liking the 'not very experienced' part. Most of the gunshots don't look fatal. Of course we'll need the ME to confirm that.' Lisbon said.
'Okay. So we look into his life, look at his friends, acquaintances, classmates, anyone he was close to, and dig into the things that he did' Cho said.
Sounds boring. Run of the mill stuff. Probably a disagreement gone wrong or something else as banal as that. Jane thought.
Glancing up, he caught Lisbon's eye and gave her a small smile. At least he was together with Lisbon. Which meant that he could watch over her. Not that this case was proving to be dangerous. But you never knew. Not when one worked with the FBI. Even the most innocent case could escalate into something life threatening. Like the Marie Flanagan case. It was supposed to be easy. Safe. And yet Lisbon and him had wound up with guns pointed at them. Lisbon had wound up nearly being shot. And it was all his fault. For not pulling her out earlier when he could have done so easily. No. he had to go that extra mile which nearly gotten the woman he loved killed. Again.
He'd been vigilant since. Attempting to assess the risks of situations, and of the people involved in the case. This had led him to the conclusion that Lisbon was never safe. Every case had it's risks. Her job placed her in constant danger. He would never be able to completely protect her. That started him thinking about them leaving the FBI.
But Lisbon would never willingly give up being a cop. Her profession was at the core of her identity. Which just meant that he had to do better in protecting her. And so when the risks of her getting hurt, or worse, dying, had been to high, he pulled her out of the operation.
Which had led to her resentment.
From Jane's point of view however, it was far better to have Lisbon alive and angry, than well... dead.
Lisbon tilted her head and smiled back at him, filling him with warmth.
Yes, he would do anything to protect Lisbon.
xoxo
'Daniel Smith. He's hiding something.' Jane said.
'The pasty, skinny guy?' Lisbon asked.
Jane and Lisbon had just finished interviewing Anderson's course mates from one of his computing classes at the university.
'Yup. Him. He's hiding something.' Jane repeated.
'You think he's the killer?'
'I don't know. But he definitely has secrets. I don't know if you noticed, but he was really nervous when we talked to him.'
Lisbon rolled her eyes.
'Of course I noticed he was nervous! The guy was practically shaking! But I thought he might just be nervous because he didn't like the idea of talking to cops!'
'Meh! There are different types of nervousness. His was definitely a guilty nervousness.'
'He has no alibi. I'll ask Wylie to dig into his records and all, see if something pops.'
'Now that that's settled, how about some lunch? I saw this really cosy Italian restaurant just now. Wanna give it a try?' Jane asked grinning brightly.
'Jane... we're working a case.'
'Yeah, but we've still got to eat!'
'Yes, but this sounds like it's going to be a long lunch.'
'Aww come on Lisbon! It's not like we can do very much at this point. At least not until Wylie has dug up his records! Please Lisbon?' Jane whined pouting a little.
Lisbon sighed. 'Fine!'
Jane grinned. 'Honestly woman, you're really lucky I'm around to take care of you! What with all the poor eating habits you have!'
'What's this got to do with my eating habits? And what's wrong with my eating habits?'
'Really? What's wrong with your eating habits? You forget to eat all the time!'
'What's this got to do with anything. I was going to get lunch, I just wasn't going to spend an insanely long time having lunch! I have some work ethic, unlike some people I know.'
'You work yourself to death! That's not work ethic, that's called being a workaholic!'
The easy banter continued between the two as they headed for lunch.
xoxo
Despite Wylie's best efforts, none of Smith's records reflected anything suspicious.
'As far as I can see, this guy's a straight arrow. A bit of a loner maybe. He stays alone in a studio apartment near campus. But he's doing well in school. Topped his class last semester! Wow! His financials don't show anything suspicious. No large transactions of money or anything.' Wylie told Jane as he swivelled around in his chair.
'Hm... these cash deposits of $800 a month. When did it start?' Jane asked.
'Started about six months back. Why?' Wylie asked.
'Do you know where it's coming from?'
'Probably from some part time work or something. It's not a lot of money.'
'Lisbon! Did Smith say he had a part time job?' Jane called.
'I don't think it came up during the interview.' Lisbon replied.
'What happens to the money?' Jane asked.
'Most of it gets used up paying rent and other bills.' Wylie said.
'We need to find out where the money's coming from.' Jane said moving towards Lisbon.
'Really? It's only $800.' Wylie said quizzically.
'Lisbon! We need to go!' Jane said excitedly, helping her into her jacket.
xoxo
'Why do you think the $800 is suspicious Jane?' Lisbon asked as the two of them got out of the car heading towards Smith's apartment.
'The money is deposited in cash Lisbon.'
'Uh huh... so? Waiters get paid in cash. Many university kids wait tables. What so weird about that?'
'Yeah, but waiters don't get paid monthly. And their wage is largely dependent on tips. What's the chance that he gets the same amount every month?'
'There are other jobs that pay in cash Jane.'
'I know. But who would pay someone $800 in cash? Wouldn't a cheque be more practical?'
'So you think he was getting the money from somewhere dodgy?' Lisbon said as she pressed Smith's doorbell.
'Maybe.' Jane said as the door opened.
'You're the guys from the FBI right?' Smith said.
'Hi, sorry to disturb you. We just need clarifications on certain things.' Lisbon said as she flashed her badge.
'Yes... yes. Come in. What can I do for you?' Smith said hesitantly.
'We just wanted to check if you did any part time work. We noticed when checking your financials that you had a deposit of $800 made every month.' Jane said, glancing around Smith's house, taking in the details.
'You're checking my financial now? Am I being suspected for the Thomas's murder?' Smith said, voice rising with anger.
'It's just a routine check sir,' said Lisbon calmly.
'That's a beautiful painting! The brush strokes look as if it were an original Van Gogh.' Jane said moving closer to examine the painting that hung above Smith's couch.
'My my, I believe it might actually be a genuine Van Gogh. Where did you get this from?' Jane asked, turning around to look at Smith with a piercing stare.
'A Van Gogh? That's expensive!' Lisbon said as she walked towards the couch.
'I... That's not... that's not a Van Gogh.' Smith stammered.
'Meh. You're a terrible liar. It wasn't just the monthly $800 was it? There was more. A lot more. You don't look like that kind who would deal drugs... hacking maybe... ah... I'm right... you were hacking ... hacking into bank accounts and stealing money.' Jane said, watching Smith intently.
'I wasn't hacking into bank accounts. How... how is it that no one would know if I were?'
'Oh but you didn't take large sums. Oh no... You took small, negligible sums. Probably less than a dollar. Yes. But you took it from many people. No one would've noticed a discrepancy.' Jane said grinning.
'You have no prove I did that! Where's the money I supposedly stole?'
'My guess? Probably in an account created using a bogus identity. Anderson found out somehow, and you killed him.'
'Like I said. You have no evidence!'
'Not yet. But I'm sure if we search your house we would find a bank card with belonging to 'someone else' in your possession. After all, you had to use it to withdraw the $800 every month, to pay your bills because they're deducted directly from your legitimate account. Thomas Anderson caught you using the other bank card didn't he? He questioned why you were using someone else's card.'
At that moment, Smith yanked a nearby drawer open pulling out a gun and aiming it directly at Jane.
Immediately, Lisbon pulled out her glock.
'Put the gun down. No one needs to get hurt.' Lisbon said gently.
Smith however continued pointing his gun at Jane, a crazed look in his eyes.
'You think you are so clever! Asking all these questions. Thomas thought he was so clever too! He kept prying into things that he had no business in knowing. The idiot! So I lured him out. Told him I wanted to pass him some notes for the course I knew he wasn't doing well in. Lured him out and shot him. Who's the clever one now?'
'Daniel, you don't want to do this, put the gun down.' Lisbon said calmly as she approached him slowly.
At that, Smith whirled towards Lisbon. His attention focused on her.
'Come on Daniel, you don't have to make this worse than it already is.' Lisbon continued, maintaining eye contact.
Smith wavered, lowering his gun.
'That's right. It's all going to be fine. Now put the gun on the floor.' Lisbon said soothingly.
Smith hesitated for a moment, then bent down slowly, compliantly.
'Good! Everything's going to be okay.' Lisbon continued as she inched closer to him.
Suddenly, he sprang up, firing his gun at Lisbon.
The next few moments were a whirl.
Lisbon cried out in pain as the bullet hit her, firing her own weapon at Smith in the process.
Jane let out a woeful howl as he rushed forward to catch Lisbon, while Smith crumpled onto the ground, less than a metre away from them, dead.
xoxo
'Teresa!' Jane cried as he held Lisbon close to him
'Patrick, I need you... to... call an ambulance... and then... ca...call Cho.' Lisbon breathed.
Jane, eyes wide with horror and tears, just stared at her. There was so much blood. Lisbon was oozing so much blood. Her entire blouse was soaked with blood. It was all red.
Red. Blood, all warm and sticky. That awful metallic smell that hung in the air, that spoke of pain and death. It was as if he had returned to another time, to another place. Where another woman he loved lay lifeless. Covered in blood.
'Can... can you do that? Jane?' Lisbon continued softly.
Lisbon's voice snapped him back to attention. She wasn't dead. He could do something about it. It wasn't over yet.
'Yes. Hold on sweetheart. Hold on.'
With that, Jane fumbled for his cellphone, making the necessary calls, all the while cradling Lisbon, stroking her arm.
xoxo
It took the ambulance ten minutes to get there.
That ten minutes seemed like an eternity.
Jane spent the whole ten minutes holding Lisbon, stroking her hair. Speaking softly to her. Telling her to hold on, that she was going to be alright. Begging her not to leave him.
At one point, when Lisbon's eyes had fluttered shut for a moment, Jane's heart stopped beating for a moment. He shook her until she opened her eyes, all the while yelling her name with such heart-wrenching woe.
He hadn't even realised that he had been crying until a kindly nurse offered him some tissue at the hospital.
He'd sat at a corner, eyes wide, stricken with fear and anxiety throughout her operation. He hadn't even noticed when the rest of the team arrived and tried to talk to him. His surroundings were just a blur. The voices around him were distant, unintelligible. All he could think of was that Lisbon must be safe. That nothing must happen to Lisbon.
It wasn't until Cho shook him violently to tell him that Lisbon was out of the operating theatre that he snapped back to reality.
The doctor said Lisbon had been lucky that the bullet had not hit anything vital, that she was stable, and that Jane could go and see her, right after he cleaned himself up.
Looking down at himself, he realised he was still covered with Lisbon's blood. Cleaning up could wait. He needed to see her. Now.
Grasping Lisbon's hand tightly as he sat by the bedside, Jane breathed a sigh of relief. Lisbon was going to be alright. She would survive this. He brought her hand to his mouth and kissed it gently.
'Thank you for not leaving me, my love.' He whispered.
There he stayed, until a nurse came in and shooed him out to get changed and cleaned up.
xoxo
Lisbon's eyes fluttered open. She could hear the constant beeping in the background. Calm, hypnotic. Her right hand was clutched tightly by Jane, who had fallen asleep, his blonde head on her bed.
The pain she felt as she tried to sit up reminded her of what happened.
She got shot.
Jane had freaked.
She could hear his cry, even now, filled with horror and sorrow. She could see the fear and desperation in his eyes as he cradled her, willing her not to let go. Through the haze of the intense pain she had felt, one thing stood up. That was Jane unravelling, clinging on with desperation to her life, and with that, his sanity. It was something she never wanted to see again.
She wanted so much to tell him to move on from her should anything happen. To pick up the pieces and begin again. To tell him the things Angela hadn't had the chance to say. But she knew in her heart that he wouldn't be able to do it. Her death would spell the end of Jane's life.
Stroking Jane's hair gently, Lisbon made a decision.
She would leave the FBI.
Not because Jane wanted her to, but because she wanted to. Because she loved Jane, and she didn't want to see him in such pain and desperation ever again. And if leaving the FBI would help with decreasing the odds of her being in danger, she would do it.
Jane woke up just as her decision was made.
'Hey!' Lisbon said with a small smile.
'Hey!' Jane smiled back, gently drawing small circles on Lisbon's hand.
'You gave me a scare there.'
Lisbon smile grew.
'Maybe we should leave the FBI.' Lisbon said softly.
Jane stared.
Then he nodded slowly, solemnly.
'Yeah, maybe we should.' He said softly. Then louder, with a laugh, 'who knows what other kind trouble we can get into together.'
-END-
A/N: Thanks for reading this! Do review and let me know what you thought about it.