Warehouse 13
Claudia Donovan
"…he killed my friend"
You have to be strong, and that's the worst part. You can't break down and let any of them know the pain you are feeling.
So, you have no one to turn to when the nightmares keep you up at night.
You have experience with nightmares, of course. With everything you've been through, it would be more surprising if you didn't. You have long been accustomed to the images of dark, towering figures that bring physical pain. You recently became used to a mental world where Joshua never returns and forever haunts you as a ghost.
These dreams, however, are new, and unusual, and utterly terrifying.
You see the man you have come to see as a father kill one of your closest friends.
You see him pull the trigger.
You see the bullet enter her body.
You see the surprise on her face. Not pain, not fear. Just surprise. Surprise that this man she had trusted could turn on her.
Then she fades away. She doesn't fall to the floor. She doesn't vanish in a blink. She fades.
And she is still trying to help him.
Then it isn't her anymore, it's Joshua, or Steve, or Myka, or Pete, and he always shoots them, and they always fade, and you can never do anything about it.
He kills them, over and over again. They fade away, and you are alone once again.
You always wake up shaking. Your body chilled, but sweating at the same time. Silent tears wet your skin. You never get back to sleep.
You let them believe that you have recovered. You let them believe that you have moved on.
You hide your dark eyes beneath makeup. You hide your subdued attitude behind the façade of actually maturing.
You can't let them know that you are hurting.
Its only nightmares, after all, and you have dealt with them before.
I wrote this to avoid writing Myka angst after that episode. I am, of course, writing Myka angst now.
I own nothing