Disclaimer: I do not own DC Comics or any of these wonderful characters (though I wish I did!)

Chapter One:

Lunchtime in the cafeteria. Two-Face, ScareCrow, The Riddler, Poison Ivy, Harley Quin, sat down to pick at the globs of mush they called "food."

"I can't stand this!" the Riddler announced. "How do they expect us to eat this kind of slop! That's the riddle!"

Two-Face muttered something about "stupid riddles." ScareCrow pushed his plate away. Poison Ivy was cradling her salad and cooing to them in some strange language.

"Yeah!" Harley squeaked. "This food is disgusting! If Mr. J was here..." her voice broke up as tears filled her eyes.

"Oh no!" Two-Face groaned. Riddler rolled his eyes and scoffed. ScareCrow simply sighed.

"Oh, Red!" Harley sobbed, throwing herself at Poison Ivy, who dropped the salad.

"Get off me you insolent girl!" Ivy screamed, pushing Harley away and bending to pick up her salad. After gently tucking the salad back on the tray, she turned to apologize to Harley.

"Look, Harley, I'm sorry the Joker left you here...again. And I'm sorry he didn't say bye before he left...again. And I'm sorry he isn't here to do whatever foolish thing you want him to do which he most likely won't do...again. And I'm sorry that I'm going to have to go through this all...again. Now are you better?" she ended, patting Harley's back.

Before Harley could answer, a dark shadow fell over their table.

"I'm sorry, but I couldn't help noticing your friend's distress. Is there a problem?"

They all turned to look at the massive bald-headed man. He spoke with a Spanish accent, and he had sharp brown eyes. He would have been considered good looking, even handsome if it weren't for his abnormally large muscles, bulging with veins and the ugly looking scar that ran across his face.

"Bane," Ivy gasped. "How...I thought...When did you..."

"When did I get locked up?" he smiled. "It's been a month now, senorita." He said, taking a seat.

"That's impossible," Riddler spoke. "We would have known."

"Not if I didn't want you too, Edward" Bane replied. "See, I've been busy, and I didn't want to waste time socializing. Not that I don't enjoy your company, you see...but business is business."

"Oh?" ScareCrow spoke. "And what's this business?"

Bane smiled, his head thrown back a little as if he were reminiscing. "Well, you see," he said, easily. "It's simple. All I've been doing is taking over Arkham Asylum."

"Hmm," Two-Face snorted. "Good luck with that. First you have to deal with us. We control a portion of Arkham."

"So do I" Riddler said.

"And I" Scarecrow added.

"I have people who tend to my needs. And I would hate to give them up," Ivy said, a deadly note in her voice.

"Yeah," Harley said, finally composed and back to her cheery self. Though, right now she was grim. "Mistah J left me in charge while he's gone and he's not gonna like it if he comes back and hears this. So, no, I'm sorry, but you can't take over Arkham."

Bane patiently listened to them as they said their parts, before replying, "My friends, listen! Of course I'm not going to completely take over them. They will still listen to you, but through me. It'll be like nothing ever changed."

"Thanks, but no thanks," Two-Face answered sarcastically. "We don't need our people listening to us after getting the okay from you. You picked the wrong place to try that "business" out, buddy."

"Ah," Bane said sadly, dropping his head. "I'm sorry to hear you say that. I was hoping you could preserve the illusion, but alas, I see it is impossible."

"What are you talking about, you steroid-freak," Two-Face spat.

"Harvey, temper," Bane chided, as if talking to a child. "Well, amigos. I'm sorry it has to come to this, but..."

"Just spit it out!" Ivy yelled.

The air became pregnant with silence as all the Rogues waited in anticipation about what he was going to say. Then he spoke, four words:

"I've already taken control."